Dalton Academy for Watchers.
willow_wren and I are in the middle of creating this crossover AU between Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Glee's Dalton Academy Warblers. We're still working on fics and drabbles, but in the meantime, we ended up RPing this little scenario out over MSN.
It will be turned into proper fic soon, but the raw transcript was just so funny we couldn't wait to share it. Be warned, it gets seriously cracky towards the end.
Dalton Academy for Watchers
Precautions
maybe he thinks Logan is pretending to have a soul so he can infiltrate the Academy and OMG KILL US ALL (Trent)
David: *sigh* Trent... Logan has a soul... but if you're really unsure, you can ask him to bite you
Trent: well THAT's not going to prove anything, Angel totally bit the Slayer before when he had a soul... maybe we can put a chip in his head
Wes: Trent, we are not going to perform brain surgery on Logan
Blaine: why not? it's not like you can kill him?
Nick: We wouldn't dare go near him with a scalpel and whatnot
Jeff: Scalpel?
Nick: Isn't that what brain surgeons use?
Wes: GUYS! we're not going to operate on Logan!
David: besides, Dean William has already determined Logan has a soul
Trent: William Dalton is already a vampire!!! One of the most notorious vampires that ever lived, have you SEEN his record?! Of COURSE he'll side with his own kind
Jeff: maybe Nick and I could do a spell
Trent, Wes, David, Blaine: NO!
Nick: so then how do we determine if Logan has a soul
Trent: i could stalk him
Blaine: you totally said that without shame, right?
Trent: there's no such thing as shame when it comes to the welfare of the future Watchers Council
Blaine: okay. I have to ask... you think Logan doesnt have a soul... what makes you think that I have one, then?
Trent: *snort* please Blaine...
David: *trying not to smirk*
Blaine: You know, just because I'm a vampire doesn't mean I don't have feelings! *sulking*
Wes: and there's your answer Blaine
Trent: because no self-respecting soulless vampire would go around pouting the way you do
Blaine: *clutches his heart* you stake me, Trent
Jeff: Trent! Don't you dare make Blaine cry!
Trent: see? you make people want to cuddle you... you have a soul
Nick: I dunno... I've heard Chris mention he'd like to cuddle Logan
Chris: *sputters, looks up in horror, turning very very red* I said no such thing!
David: completely different context, Nick
Blaine: you're all breaking my heart, I hope you know
Jeff: I think I know of a spell that can fix that
Wes, David and Trent: NO SPELLS, JEFF.
Jeff: *pouts*
Blaine: *pats his arm*
Nick: Don't you dare make Jeff cry, you guys!
Jeff: *wibbles*
Blaine: *sulks* Jeff pouts cuter than i do
Wes: *frowns, looking at David* Did...did he just say that?!
David: Kurt would beg to differ, Blaine. And yes, yes he did.
Wes: *rolling his eyes* And he wonders why we know he's got a soul...
Blaine: my feelings! you're wounding them!
Jeff: stop wounding Blaine's feelings... especially since you all wont let me use magic to heal them :(
Nick: Stop making Jeff pout!
Trent: they're all possessed!
Jeff: *complete 180 and perks* exorcism?
*deadpan stares from Wes, David and Trent*
Trent: It's a figure of speech, Jeff.
Nick: *shrugging* I've never heard it before
Trent: For goodness' sakes, Nick! *throws hands in the air and walks out*
Chris: *after being silent for the entire time...* Hey guys? You know how I researched on Logan for that presentation?
Wes: what about it Chris?
Chris: Well, he DOES have a soul. *goes back to his work*
David: *looks at Wes*
Jeff: oh... well then I'll just go tell Trent.. *gets up*
Blaine: *pulls him back down* uhh no *smirks* After hurting my feelings, I think we should let Trent find out for himself.
And then Nick and Jeff look at each other (before Wes speaks)
Nick: I thought you had a soul, Blaine...
Wes: but how do YOU know, Chris?
Blaine: well you all just assumed I did
Jeff: wait, so you DON'T have a soul?
Jeff: you LIED to me?!
Nick: facepalm
Chris: *turns a little red* I think he saw I was a little worried that he'd bite me, so...he told me. *shrugs*
Jeff: *poooouuuut* I can't believe you lied to me Blaine!
Nick: *GLARES at Blaine*
Wes: *stares at them in utter confusion*
Blaine: *too busy soaking up the attention* I have a soul!
Jeff: then why did Nick say you didn’t
Blaine: you shouldn't believe everything Nick tells you
Jeff: *complete 180 again* Oh... so when Nick said he thought you had a huge massive crush on our current Lima Slayer... i shouldn't believe him?
David: wait, what?!
Blaine: *stares at Nick in horror* THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET!
Wes: Blaine Anderson, you are NOT going to be a distraction to my Slayer
Blaine: he's not your Slayer yet, Montgomery
Wes: Yes, well, he will be once I graduate.
Chris: i don’t think Wes is the one you need to fear
Wes: *chucks a paper ball at him*
Blaine: please... Wes is about as scary as a teddy bear
Wes: much like you, then, Blaine
David: you've never met Coach Sylvester yet have you, Blaine?
Chris: Coach Sylvester *shudder*
Nick: I'm convinced she might be part demon
Jeff: *puppydog eyes*
Wes: *rolls eyes* NO EXORCISM, JEFF.
Jeff: *sad puppydog eyes* but... I saw this spell to identify demons in the McClay Manuscripts...
Nick: ... wait... you read those?!
Jeff: *nodnodnod*
Nick: *puppydog eyes*
Wes: ... David... a little help here?
David: *chuckling* Nah, man, this is too much fun
Blaine: so... who's Coach Sylvester and why should i be afraid?
Wes: She's Kurt's...mentor...until I graduate. She can be a little...
Nick: Crazy?
Chris: Terrifying?
David: Demonic?
Wes: *glares at everyone* Scary.
Blaine: *shrugs* I'm a vampire
Jeff: a cuddly one
Blaine: *glares*
David: *falls off his chair*
Jeff: I meant that in a good way, I swear!
David: *rolls around on the floor* *gasping* make... make them stop... please
Chris: he wont stand a chance against Coach Sylvester
Blaine: *hurt* Of course I will!
Nick: unless he pouts her to death
Blaine: *throws his shoe at Nick*
Jeff: OMG! Don't make Blaine cry!
David: *holding his sides* oh please make them stop!!! I can't breathe!!
Nick: *throws the shoe back*
Blaine: *catches it with his awesome vampire reflexes* Thanks, Nick. My foot was getting cold.
Nick: can't be any colder than your jokes
Chris: ... oh burn....
Blaine: *pouts* You know, I don't have to sit here and listen to you take shot after shot at me. Vampires have feelings too!
Wes: you could always go help Trent stalk Logan
Logan: *walks in with a glass of red liquid and sits in an armchair, crossing his legs oh so elegantly* oh is that what he's trying to do then?
Chris: *blushes as red as the liquid in his glass*
Jeff: *peers* is that blood?
Logan: AB neg
Blaine; *rolls his eyes*
Logan: so why is Trent attempting to stalk me?
Blaine: He doesn't think you have a soul. And yet, everyone's convinced that I can't NOT have one.
Logan: *smirks* Well of course YOU'VE got a soul. Next to Angel, you're the tamest vampire there is. Besides, have you seen the way you pout?
Blaine: I have a cute pout!
Logan: *raises an eyebrow* That's my point, Blaine.
David: *still on the floor* i can't take much more of this
Jeff: I offered to do a spell...
Nick: Jeff, let it go...
Logan: *looks at Jeff curiously* Because your spells have a history of going so well...
Jeff: I'm still learning! Even Willow Rosenberg took years to master everything!
Logan: *smirks* Willow...good times...
Jeff: *jaw drops* You knew Willow Rosenberg?
Blaine: mmm.. *nods in agreement*
Jeff: Blaine?! You too?
Blaine: told her red was always her color...
Jeff: *puppydogeyes.. iloveyousomuchblainelovelovelove*
Blaine: *smug*
Logan: her girlfriend agreed with you
Jeff: .... *crushed*
Blaine: *scowls at Logan* Way to rain on my parade, Logan.
Nick: *cuddles Jeff* it's okay.. she would have been too old for you anyway
Jeff: *sniffles* Age doesn't matter when it's true love.
Wes: *rolls his eyes* Really, Jeff? Really?
Jeff: look at Blaine and the Slayer!!!
Logan: wait, what?
Blaine: *groans* IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET!
Enjoy!
It will be turned into proper fic soon, but the raw transcript was just so funny we couldn't wait to share it. Be warned, it gets seriously cracky towards the end.
Dalton Academy for Watchers
Precautions
maybe he thinks Logan is pretending to have a soul so he can infiltrate the Academy and OMG KILL US ALL (Trent)
David: *sigh* Trent... Logan has a soul... but if you're really unsure, you can ask him to bite you
Trent: well THAT's not going to prove anything, Angel totally bit the Slayer before when he had a soul... maybe we can put a chip in his head
Wes: Trent, we are not going to perform brain surgery on Logan
Blaine: why not? it's not like you can kill him?
Nick: We wouldn't dare go near him with a scalpel and whatnot
Jeff: Scalpel?
Nick: Isn't that what brain surgeons use?
Wes: GUYS! we're not going to operate on Logan!
David: besides, Dean William has already determined Logan has a soul
Trent: William Dalton is already a vampire!!! One of the most notorious vampires that ever lived, have you SEEN his record?! Of COURSE he'll side with his own kind
Jeff: maybe Nick and I could do a spell
Trent, Wes, David, Blaine: NO!
Nick: so then how do we determine if Logan has a soul
Trent: i could stalk him
Blaine: you totally said that without shame, right?
Trent: there's no such thing as shame when it comes to the welfare of the future Watchers Council
Blaine: okay. I have to ask... you think Logan doesnt have a soul... what makes you think that I have one, then?
Trent: *snort* please Blaine...
David: *trying not to smirk*
Blaine: You know, just because I'm a vampire doesn't mean I don't have feelings! *sulking*
Wes: and there's your answer Blaine
Trent: because no self-respecting soulless vampire would go around pouting the way you do
Blaine: *clutches his heart* you stake me, Trent
Jeff: Trent! Don't you dare make Blaine cry!
Trent: see? you make people want to cuddle you... you have a soul
Nick: I dunno... I've heard Chris mention he'd like to cuddle Logan
Chris: *sputters, looks up in horror, turning very very red* I said no such thing!
David: completely different context, Nick
Blaine: you're all breaking my heart, I hope you know
Jeff: I think I know of a spell that can fix that
Wes, David and Trent: NO SPELLS, JEFF.
Jeff: *pouts*
Blaine: *pats his arm*
Nick: Don't you dare make Jeff cry, you guys!
Jeff: *wibbles*
Blaine: *sulks* Jeff pouts cuter than i do
Wes: *frowns, looking at David* Did...did he just say that?!
David: Kurt would beg to differ, Blaine. And yes, yes he did.
Wes: *rolling his eyes* And he wonders why we know he's got a soul...
Blaine: my feelings! you're wounding them!
Jeff: stop wounding Blaine's feelings... especially since you all wont let me use magic to heal them :(
Nick: Stop making Jeff pout!
Trent: they're all possessed!
Jeff: *complete 180 and perks* exorcism?
*deadpan stares from Wes, David and Trent*
Trent: It's a figure of speech, Jeff.
Nick: *shrugging* I've never heard it before
Trent: For goodness' sakes, Nick! *throws hands in the air and walks out*
Chris: *after being silent for the entire time...* Hey guys? You know how I researched on Logan for that presentation?
Wes: what about it Chris?
Chris: Well, he DOES have a soul. *goes back to his work*
David: *looks at Wes*
Jeff: oh... well then I'll just go tell Trent.. *gets up*
Blaine: *pulls him back down* uhh no *smirks* After hurting my feelings, I think we should let Trent find out for himself.
And then Nick and Jeff look at each other (before Wes speaks)
Nick: I thought you had a soul, Blaine...
Wes: but how do YOU know, Chris?
Blaine: well you all just assumed I did
Jeff: wait, so you DON'T have a soul?
Jeff: you LIED to me?!
Nick: facepalm
Chris: *turns a little red* I think he saw I was a little worried that he'd bite me, so...he told me. *shrugs*
Jeff: *poooouuuut* I can't believe you lied to me Blaine!
Nick: *GLARES at Blaine*
Wes: *stares at them in utter confusion*
Blaine: *too busy soaking up the attention* I have a soul!
Jeff: then why did Nick say you didn’t
Blaine: you shouldn't believe everything Nick tells you
Jeff: *complete 180 again* Oh... so when Nick said he thought you had a huge massive crush on our current Lima Slayer... i shouldn't believe him?
David: wait, what?!
Blaine: *stares at Nick in horror* THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET!
Wes: Blaine Anderson, you are NOT going to be a distraction to my Slayer
Blaine: he's not your Slayer yet, Montgomery
Wes: Yes, well, he will be once I graduate.
Chris: i don’t think Wes is the one you need to fear
Wes: *chucks a paper ball at him*
Blaine: please... Wes is about as scary as a teddy bear
Wes: much like you, then, Blaine
David: you've never met Coach Sylvester yet have you, Blaine?
Chris: Coach Sylvester *shudder*
Nick: I'm convinced she might be part demon
Jeff: *puppydog eyes*
Wes: *rolls eyes* NO EXORCISM, JEFF.
Jeff: *sad puppydog eyes* but... I saw this spell to identify demons in the McClay Manuscripts...
Nick: ... wait... you read those?!
Jeff: *nodnodnod*
Nick: *puppydog eyes*
Wes: ... David... a little help here?
David: *chuckling* Nah, man, this is too much fun
Blaine: so... who's Coach Sylvester and why should i be afraid?
Wes: She's Kurt's...mentor...until I graduate. She can be a little...
Nick: Crazy?
Chris: Terrifying?
David: Demonic?
Wes: *glares at everyone* Scary.
Blaine: *shrugs* I'm a vampire
Jeff: a cuddly one
Blaine: *glares*
David: *falls off his chair*
Jeff: I meant that in a good way, I swear!
David: *rolls around on the floor* *gasping* make... make them stop... please
Chris: he wont stand a chance against Coach Sylvester
Blaine: *hurt* Of course I will!
Nick: unless he pouts her to death
Blaine: *throws his shoe at Nick*
Jeff: OMG! Don't make Blaine cry!
David: *holding his sides* oh please make them stop!!! I can't breathe!!
Nick: *throws the shoe back*
Blaine: *catches it with his awesome vampire reflexes* Thanks, Nick. My foot was getting cold.
Nick: can't be any colder than your jokes
Chris: ... oh burn....
Blaine: *pouts* You know, I don't have to sit here and listen to you take shot after shot at me. Vampires have feelings too!
Wes: you could always go help Trent stalk Logan
Logan: *walks in with a glass of red liquid and sits in an armchair, crossing his legs oh so elegantly* oh is that what he's trying to do then?
Chris: *blushes as red as the liquid in his glass*
Jeff: *peers* is that blood?
Logan: AB neg
Blaine; *rolls his eyes*
Logan: so why is Trent attempting to stalk me?
Blaine: He doesn't think you have a soul. And yet, everyone's convinced that I can't NOT have one.
Logan: *smirks* Well of course YOU'VE got a soul. Next to Angel, you're the tamest vampire there is. Besides, have you seen the way you pout?
Blaine: I have a cute pout!
Logan: *raises an eyebrow* That's my point, Blaine.
David: *still on the floor* i can't take much more of this
Jeff: I offered to do a spell...
Nick: Jeff, let it go...
Logan: *looks at Jeff curiously* Because your spells have a history of going so well...
Jeff: I'm still learning! Even Willow Rosenberg took years to master everything!
Logan: *smirks* Willow...good times...
Jeff: *jaw drops* You knew Willow Rosenberg?
Blaine: mmm.. *nods in agreement*
Jeff: Blaine?! You too?
Blaine: told her red was always her color...
Jeff: *puppydogeyes.. iloveyousomuchblainelovelovelove*
Blaine: *smug*
Logan: her girlfriend agreed with you
Jeff: .... *crushed*
Blaine: *scowls at Logan* Way to rain on my parade, Logan.
Nick: *cuddles Jeff* it's okay.. she would have been too old for you anyway
Jeff: *sniffles* Age doesn't matter when it's true love.
Wes: *rolls his eyes* Really, Jeff? Really?
Jeff: look at Blaine and the Slayer!!!
Logan: wait, what?
Blaine: *groans* IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET!
Enjoy!