When Jake had left the party, he hadn’t meant to be gone so long or run so far. He needed to clear his head, needed to feel the cold bite through his thick fur. He’d caught the wolf scent by accident and had followed the trail until he’d found a pack of wolves. Wolves bigger than any regular wolf on Earth and while he couldn’t communicate with them, they’d been willing enough to let him run with them. Maybe because he was still bigger.
They’d run far and by the time he realised he couldn’t see Fandom anymore, the snow had covered their tracks and stolen away their scent. He’d been relieved when he finally did find the causeway as the sun had gone under behind the white snowy peaks. Not that the tightness in his chest had gone away and he took hours packing his bag for the cabins where usually it’d take him fifteen minutes.
By the time he made it down to the cabins, it was stupidly late and Jake felt the last 24 hours catch up with him. Courage Wolf, it kind of felt like a joke right now. He quietly entered the cabin, turning right into his alcove even as he wanted to check on the one beside his. He blinked at the stacked cots there and dropped his duffel bag on the ground before giving in and checking to see if the extra cot was what he thought it was.
He found a pile of blankets and what he presumed was a girlfriend underneath. Her breathing was too muffled for him to make out if she was awake or not, but the invitation was obvious and despite everything, he couldn’t turn it down. He kicked off his shoes and wriggled out of his shirt and jeans before he approached the pile of blankets, lifting them so he could slide in.
She'd squeezed her eyes closed the moment she heard him in the cabin and it was kind of a wonder he hadn't heard her heart trying to thump right out of her chest in agony as she waited to find out if he was going to stay or just walk out on her again.
When he settled down on the floor under her blankets, she instantly slid closer, drawn in by his natural warmth and that little part of her that had feared he wouldn't want to sleep there. A smarter girl probably would have kept her mouth shut, but this was Caroline. "Took you long enough to remember I'd miss you."
At least she was whispering for their cabinmates sake.
"Sorry," he murmured, his throat tight and his voice broke on the whisper. He didn’t know what else to say and he reached for her instead, wrapping his arm around her waist in a gesture that was becoming all too familiar for them.
She sighed, snuggling back against his chest and pulling his arm more tightly around her. "I should've followed you," she added, having come to that conclusion during all her overthinking - somewhere between the anger of the afternoon and the worry of the evening and thinking she’d been an idiot not to realize it the night before.
His reaction was instant as she pulled him closer and his arm tightened around her reflexively as he buried his face in her hair, eyes squeezed shut. He’d expected her to be pissed at him, or at least to push him out. Not this, not to let him hold her and not those words, which made it hard to remember why he’d left in the first place.
"I wasn’t exactly awesome company," he said finally, knowing that was an understatement.
"I know, but I shouldn't have listened to you," she sighed, mostly frustrated with herself for trying to enjoy the party when he'd told her to because of course that had just upset him more. "I was stupid, trying to have fun when you were miserable."
"Fuck, Caroline," he made a frustrated sound, but at least he was managing to keep his tone down. He wasn't aware of how tightly he was holding on to her, though. "It was your party, you should have enjoyed it. It's not your fault. I know you're not going to kiss anyone else. I know that you're mine, but I keep doing this."
He was so going to crush her on accident and she had to squirm a little, trying to thread her fingers with his to get him to let go. "Did you figure out why?" She had to hope that his disappearance had helped him in some way.
He blinked and slowly released his hold, threading his fingers through hers and he wondered if she realised now just how much he did need her. "Because it's what I am," he admitted, sounding bitter. "I wish I could just ignore him or pity him, but it pisses me off to watch him flirt with you and know that he's picturing you..." He stopped, trying not to get caught up in it again. "It's like something inside of me snaps and it won't be happy until I've ripped out his throat. So instead I ruin everything."
Did he need her when being with her inspired these sorts of thoughts? It seemed seriously messy. "You didn't ruin everything," she said quietly, petting her free hand over his arm to try and soothe him. "I don't think anyone but me even noticed."
Possibly, but he also wanted her to turn around and wrap her arms around him and say it would be alright. He didn't feel alright. "You keep telling me I'm perfect," he murmured, "but I'm not. I've been screwing up so much lately, and maybe you should be mad. I don't know why you'd want to put up with a jealous control freak of a boyfriend."
She couldn't suppress the urge to turn around and wrap her arms around him at that, whispering as she looked into his eyes. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm just really stupid for falling for you."
Now that she did what he wanted, he was the one to tense up. Not that he could hold it against her since she'd just agreed with him and he didn't seem able to see that maybe she was just teasing him. "Do you want me to go?"
"Oh sweetie, no." Kissing his cheek she hugged him a little tighter, her teasing having failed terribly. "Just calm down, okay? If I thought it would make you happy, I would totally try my best to be mad and hate you. But it won't so I can't because I don't and you have to get over that. No more running away from me."
They’d run far and by the time he realised he couldn’t see Fandom anymore, the snow had covered their tracks and stolen away their scent. He’d been relieved when he finally did find the causeway as the sun had gone under behind the white snowy peaks. Not that the tightness in his chest had gone away and he took hours packing his bag for the cabins where usually it’d take him fifteen minutes.
By the time he made it down to the cabins, it was stupidly late and Jake felt the last 24 hours catch up with him. Courage Wolf, it kind of felt like a joke right now. He quietly entered the cabin, turning right into his alcove even as he wanted to check on the one beside his. He blinked at the stacked cots there and dropped his duffel bag on the ground before giving in and checking to see if the extra cot was what he thought it was.
He found a pile of blankets and what he presumed was a girlfriend underneath. Her breathing was too muffled for him to make out if she was awake or not, but the invitation was obvious and despite everything, he couldn’t turn it down. He kicked off his shoes and wriggled out of his shirt and jeans before he approached the pile of blankets, lifting them so he could slide in.
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When he settled down on the floor under her blankets, she instantly slid closer, drawn in by his natural warmth and that little part of her that had feared he wouldn't want to sleep there. A smarter girl probably would have kept her mouth shut, but this was Caroline. "Took you long enough to remember I'd miss you."
At least she was whispering for their cabinmates sake.
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"I wasn’t exactly awesome company," he said finally, knowing that was an understatement.
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