Heechul/Hyukjae (Donghae, Hyukjae) fic
title: learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss
Heechul/Hyukjae (Donghae, Hyukjae)
humor, angst, romance, fluff
NC-17
late late late birthday!fic for shieldkitten. I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS. IT KILLED ME DEAD. IT'S NOT AT ALL LIKE WHAT YOU WANTED. BUT I GOT THE PAIRING RIGHT. ALSO, PORN. (akjsdlkajdslj ;_; never again.)
"Heechul has been going out late at night," Donghae said, throwing himself onto the sofa and propping his feet up on Hyukjae's lap; careful not to drop what he was carrying. "It's suspicious, don't you think?"
Hyukjae hit the power button on the television remote, giving up on what he had hoped would be quiet Hyukjae time, and looked over at Donghae. "What?"
Donghae had set down most of the half-dozen bottles he had brought in with him and was currently emptying the contents of one of them into a metal bowl that he'd placed in his lap. Held under his right arm was a hat that Hyukjae was almost certain didn't belong to Donghae at all. It looked like one of Shiwon's. "Heechul; he's been acting suspicious," repeated Donghae.
"Oh," said Hyukjae, grabbing for the television and planning to go back to what he had been doing. "I haven't noticed anything different."
Donghae stared at him as if he were a little slow. "Of course you haven't. He only goes out at night when everyone else is busy or sleeping." Donghae picked up a small bottle full of a dark blue liquid, and poured it into the bowl that had been filled with what looked to Hyukjae like shampoo. He started mixing them together with his fingers.
"Oh," said Hyukjae. "Do you know why?"
"No! He won't tell me, which is even more suspicious, if you ask me. He tells me things." Donghae sat up straight and nearly upturned the bowl and all of its contents. "What if he's gotten into some kind of trouble and needs my help but is too afraid to ask? Or what if he's going out every night to gamble all of his money away? It's an addiction, Hyukjae. Or what if it's a fan who is blackmailing him into dating her and soon it will be a big scandal because she's carrying his child and Heechul has to move out to the country and become a farmer and raise a family of children with a woman who wants him to sing Miracle all the time? Have you thought of that?"
Hyukjae blinked slowly. "No, I don't think I've ever thought of any of that before in my life."
Donghae rolled his eyes. "That's why you're always so unprepared, you know." He painstakingly began pouring the now dark-blue mixture back into the original bottles he'd brought with him which, upon second look, were actually shampoo bottles. "I think what we'll have to do is follow Heechul. Tonight."
Hyukjae looked away from Donghae's blue-tinged fingertips and up to his dark brown eyes, hoping he had misheard. "Wait, what?"
"Tonight," said Donghae, screwing the caps back onto the bottles. "We'll sneak out after Heechul and find out what he's up to. I already have a plan, too. I'll go upstairs and wait for him to leave, and then I will call you and we can meet in the lobby and follow him in the shadows. It'll be easy." Never in his life had Hyukjae thought he'd be even halfway decent at stealth. And Donghae's plan left much to be desired, as well.
Hyukjae opened and closed his mouth a few times, unable to think up any appropriate response to Donghae's clear and unfortunate madness. "Why me?"
Donghae waved a hand over the odd assortment of things he'd carried in with him and gave a lopsided grin. "I didn't have time to find anything of yours, so you are the only one I can trust right now." He flipped over the hat that Hyukjae had nearly forgotten about and held up a large packet of glitter. "I was bored."
Oh, thought Hyukjae. "Oh."
*
Donghae had gone back to his own apartment nearly two hours earlier, and Hyukjae had successfully put all of Donghae's weird ideas and crazy schemes out of his mind. He had just changed into his pajamas and was about to crawl into bed when his phone rang and he had to fish it out from somewhere deep in his pile of dirty clothes.
"Heechul is leaving! Go follow him down to the lobby," Donghae practically yelled through the phonelines.
Hyukjae started to form a response along the lines of "No; sleeping!" but Donghae cut him off before even the first word left his mouth.
"Go," he said. "Now! Hyukjae, we have to find out the truth."
"Fine," Hyukjae sighed, shutting his phone and trying not to think too hard on the fact that he'd be attempting to sneak around the city in his pajamas, or that he was tired and just wanted to go to bed, or even that he was pretty sure he'd vowed some time ago never to listen to Donghae ever again.
As quietly as he could, Hyukjae put on his shoes and slipped out of the apartment. He pressed the button for the elevator and too late realized that might not have been the best idea when the doors slid open and Heechul was standing there giving him a none-too-friendly look. Hyukjae just stood there, staring, like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.
The doors started to close, but Heechul stuck his hand out to stop them, never once looking away from Hyukjae. "Are you getting on?" he asked.
"Yes? Yes! I have...things. I have to do things. Now," Hyukjae replied, trying to sound casual and not at all like the world's very worst ninja he could possibly be. He stepped inside the elevator and immediately his phone started to ring again.
"Hyukjae?" Donghae whispered, "change of plans. You're going to have to go by yourself. Hankyung is staging an inquiry about his blue-tinged hair. If you ask me, it's not that ba--" The line cut off. Hyukjae wondered if he should be at least a little worried.
The rest of the short ride down to the lobby was spent in silence. When the doors finally opened again, Heechul walked out without saying another word to Hyukjae. He head out the front of the building with Hyukjae trailing behind as best as he could without being too obvious. Hyukjae hid behind some bushes as he watched Heechul walk down the sidewalk toward the main road where he hailed a taxi, forgoing his own car.
Without even thinking, Hyukjae ran toward the street and waved over the first available taxi he saw. "Follow that car!" he said before he was even fully in the backseat. The cab driver looked at Hyukjae in his rearview mirror, then ahead toward the taxi Heechul was in, then back to Hyukjae.
"Please?" Hyukjae tried.
The cab driver sighed heavily, but pulled away from the curb and started driving after Heechul.
*
"Stop!" cried Hyukjae. "Stop here." He ducked lower in the backseat of the taxi and pressed his face against the window, watching as Heechul got out of his cab in front of SM's main office building in Seoul. The taxi Hyukjae was in pulled up to the curb at the corner across the small side street. They idled there as Hyukjae watched Heechul walk toward the back entrance, nod to the security guard on duty, and head inside the back entrance.
The cab driver eyed Hyukjae wearily while tapping his fingers roughly against the steering-wheel.
"Er," Hyukjae said, when he was pretty sure it was safe to get out without being spotted. "Thanks." He pulled out all the cash he'd brought with him, handed it over without even looking at the meter, and scrambled out onto the sidewalk as fast as he could. He was positive he'd over-payed by at least double, but he couldn't help but feel a little judged by the other man. And to make it worse, Hyukjae was pretty sure he deserved that judgement. Only a lunatic would be sneaking around at night in their pajamas chasing after another man for no other reason than they were told to by an equally crazy person.
Swiftly, Hyukjae crossed the small street and crept around to the back entrance of the building. The security guard noticed him almost immediately and raised an eyebrow at Hyukjae's poorly concealed approach.
Hyukjae straightened up, stepped out of the shadows, and attempted to make himself appear less awkward than he felt. "Hi. I'm just here too-" He waved his arms around a little to express something innocent and not at all like stalking. "I'll just go in."
The security guard nodded and stepped out of the way so Hyukjae could pass.
*
It didn't take nearly as long to find the room Heechul was in as Hyukjae had thought. Mostly because Heechul happened to be in the first room he checked, but that was overlookable. Hyukjae quietly opened the door a small fraction and peered inside.
Heechul was in the room with the music turned up high enough so even if Hyukjae made any kind of noise, Heechul probably wouldn't hear him. The song changed to a different one with a faster beat and Heechul closed his eyes and started to dance. His movements were awkward and stiff and Hyukjae thought he looked like he was off a beat every few steps.
After a minute or so, Hyukjae felt as if he were intruding on something he really shouldn't be seeing and he tried very, very hard to leave without getting caught, except he wasn't nearly lucky enough for that. He caught his foot on the bottom of his pants, lost his balance and tried to regain it by clinging to the door, but instead he tripped over his own foot and went crashing to the ground. The door slammed open behind him to add emphasis to his graceful arrival, if him being sprawled out on the floor wasn't obvious enough for Heechul.
"What are you doing here?" Heechul ground out, teeth clenched. He stormed over to Hyukjae and pulled him up until they were standing face to face. "Did you follow me?"
"No! Yes. Maybe?" Hyukjae tried to take a step back, but Heechul had a firm grip on the collar of his shirt. "It was Donghae's idea!"
Heechul's eyes widened and he pushed Hyukjae out of the way so he could look out of the room. "Is Donghae here?" He asked, turning back to Hyukjae.
Hyukjae shook his head. "No, he made me come alone." Hyukjae realized how stupid he sounded, but he saw how Heechul relaxed slightly at his answer.
"Good," Heechul said. "He can't keep a secret. And you," Heechul once again grabbed hold of Hyukjae collar in a firm grip. "If you tell anyone I will never stop hurting you."
Hyukjae swallowed, or at least tried to, but he found that his throat had gone dry and his pulse had sped up and he feared he was about to have a heart attack.
Heechul sighed, rolling his eyes. "You're so easy," he said, letting go of Hyukjae. "I wouldn't actually hurt you, you know."
"Oh," Hyukjae answered.
"But if you tell anyone, I will make your life miserable," added Heechul, turning away.
"Oh," said Hyukjae, voice coming out hoarse. He swallowed again and took a deep breath. "Um. I saw you. Before. I could help you, if you want. If you're trying to improve, that is. I could...help," he finished lamely.
Heechul cocked his head to the side and gazed over at Hyukjae. "Okay," he said, after a moment of consideration. "But you can't tell anyone. If everyone started to think that I care about these things, they'd want me to try harder more often. I like where I'm at most of the time." His features hardened. "This is a secret you will take to your grave."
Hyukjae's eyes widened and he nodded his head vigorously. "Okay," he repeated.
*
The next day, Hyukjae was woken up by Donghae throwing himself onto his bed, stealing all of his blankets, and pressing his ice-cold feet against Hyukjae's bare skin. "So, what did you find out last night?" Donghae asked.
Without even opening his eyes, Hyukjae tried to simultaneously push Donghae off of his bed and steal back his blankets because he was cold and Donghae had his own bed somewhere else. He was successful in neither area, and somehow ended up loosing his pillow too. "Go away," he mumbled, rolling over.
"Tell me what happened," Donghae insisted, poking Hyukjae in the ribs.
"Nothing happened, I couldn't find him. Give me back my pillow," Hyukjae said.
Donghae curled up against Hyukjae's back and moved the pillow around so they were sharing it. "Really?"
"Yes," replied Hyukjae, wriggling around a little to get more comfortable.
"Too bad," said Donghae. He adjusted the blankets so that they were wrapped around both of them. "I bet it's something interesting, too."
"Yeah," Hyukjae breathed out, content, and already falling back asleep.
*
Hyukjae was once again sat in front of the television trying to enjoy a movie during what was supposed to have been quiet Hyukjae time, but instead he was joined by Donghae and Sungmin and somehow his alone time had turned into something entirely different altogether. Sungmin was lying down with his head resting in Donghae's lap and Hyukjae had been relegated to footstool duty for a second time.
"Weird how?" Sungmin asked, tilting his head back to look up at Donghae. "Maybe he's just tired lately. More than usual. You could also be imagining things."
"That one gets my vote," said Hyukjae. He tried to discreetly turn the volume up on the television, but was caught by Donghae who grabbed the remote from his hands and shut it off. Hyukjae flopped back against the sofa in defeat.
"Weird like, you know, weird," said Donghae in response to Sungmin's question. "Suspicious. Hyukjae tried to follow Heechul a few nights ago, but it didn't work."
"Oh," Sungmin said, as if it were perfectly natural for Hyukjae to fail at something.
"Hey-" Hyukjae started to say before he was cut off when the front door slammed open.
"Hyukjae!" Heechul called out, practically running over to them. "You're coming with me." He grabbed hold of Hyukjae's wrist and tugged him up into a standing position.
Donghae and Sungmin stared up at the two of them in confusion. "Why are you taking Hyukjae?" Donghae asked, having regained his senses after the initial shock of seeing Heechul.
"He owes me food," Heechul answered easily. He started walking toward the door, fingers still wrapped around Hyukjae's wrist.
"Bring back something for us!" Sungmin called after them right as they reached the front door.
*
"If you wanted me to come with you, you could have just asked instead of making something up," Hyukjae said, finally, as they stood inside one of the dance practice rooms in the early hours of the morning. "I wouldn't have said no."
Heechul gazed at him for a moment or two, quiet and contemplating, before the corners of his mouth turned up and he smacked Hyukjae on the back of the head. "I think it's time for a break," he said, hitting the power button on the music system and picking up his water bottle. He sat down, back against the mirrored wall and after a second, Hyukjae joined him.
"Thanks," said Heechul. "For doing this and keeping it a secret." He didn't look at Hyukjae, but instead stared intensely at the far side of the room. "You didn't have to."
"It's no problem," Hyukjae responded, barely managing not to stumble over his words. "We're in this group together and I'd do anything for all of the members." He grinned, thinking back to Donghae suspecting something weird going on. "Donghae thinks you're being blackmailed by one of the fans into dating her," he said. "It's all he's been talking about for days and he's determined to get to the bottom of it."
Heechul took a sip from of his water and asked, "Do you like him?" lips still pressed to the rim of the bottle.
"What?" Hyukjae choked a bit on the air in his lungs and sat up so fast he knocked into Heechul causing him to spill some of his water over his face and chest. "Sorry," he said, patting Heechul down in a pathetic attempt to fix what he'd done. His eyes lingered for a moment at where Heechul's white shirt had become nearly transparent and was clinging to his skin. Hyukjae looked away, hoping Heechul hadn't noticed. "It was an accident. Sorry."
Heechul carefully screwed the lid back onto the bottle and set it down, out of the way, and tried to wipe the water off of his chin with the bottom of his shirt. "Do you like Donghae," he asked again after sufficiently drying himself.
Hyukjae could feel his face turning red in embarrassment. "No! I mean, everyone like's Donghae, but I. No. Not like...that. I mean. Not that. It's just that everyone likes Donghae."
Heechul's lips were pressed in a tight line and Hyukjae wondered if he had said the wrong thing for the millionth time in his life. "Do you like Donghae?"
Heechul smacked him on the back of his head again, then stood up. "You're an idiot. Break's over; make me a better dancer like you said you would."
"Sure, yeah," replied Hyukjae, going to turn the music back on.
"And this time, show me the moves slowly so I know what I'm supposed to do," Heechul added. "Not everyone is born with the ability to flail their limbs in rhythm and call it dancing like you do."
*
Almost the entire group were backstage before an interview and Hyukjae was resting his head against Eeteuk's shoulder. He was trying to sleep while listening to Eeteuk and Kangin talk softly between themselves. As he neared an almost completely unconscious state, he felt something cold press against his neck, causing him to snap his eyes open, sit up straight, and look wildly around the room.
"Here," Heechul said, waving a can of juice in front of his face, almost hitting him on the nose. "Take it."
Hyukjae blinked a few times before cautiously accepting the drink from Heechul's outstretched hand. "Thank you," he mumbled, still not entirely sure what was going on or why Heechul was giving him things when it wasn't exactly in his nature to do so. Especially to Hyukjae who wasn't quite sure if he was really still asleep.
Heechul sighed loudly. "I had extra change."
"Oh, um." Hyukjae looked around and saw that nearly everyone else in the room was watching them intently. Donghae looked to be pantomiming something behind Shindong and Sungmin seemed to be nodding in agreement to whatever it was. "Thank you anyway. You didn't have to," he finished.
Heechul sighed once more. "Of course I didn't. You're an idiot." He turned on his heel and walked off to, presumably, find someone more worth his time to talk to.
"That was different," Eeteuk said after a moment.
Kangin snorted. "Yeah. What was that about?"
Hyukjae shrugged and popped the tab on the can. "He had extra change."
*
Hyukjae was sprawled out on the floor of one of the practice rooms, dripping sweat, and forcing oxygen into his lungs through sheer determination. "You aren't getting any better," he wheezed in a rare moment of candor brought on by complete and total exhaustion. "We've been at this for hours, non-stop -- why won't you stop? -- and I can't remember what it was like to sleep. I can't feel my left side. This is the end and you've killed me."
Heechul, who had fallen somewhere to Hyukjae's right, flopped his head to the side. "We've stopped; not moving is the same as stopping. Stop being so dramatic, it doesn't suit you. When did you start talking to me like that?"
"When I couldn't feel half of my body anymore," Hyukjae answered. "Sorry."
"Don't apologize," said Heechul.
"I wasn't thinking," Hyukjae continued. "Donghae sometimes talks to you that and. I don't know. Sorry."
"Donghae is allowed to talk to me however he wants. I like him," Heechul responded, shifting onto his side.
Hyukjae closed his eyes. "Everyone likes him."
"You've said that," sighed Heechul.
"Oh," said Hyukjae. "Sorry."
"Stop apologizing!" Heechul snapped, rolling back onto his back and further away from Hyukjae. "You lied to me before. I know how you feel about him."
Hyukjae bolted upright, despite his protesting muscles, and stared down at Heechul wide-eyed and ready to run. "I didn't! I don't. I mean," he faltered. "I didn't lie. And I don't anymore. I did but...not anymore." He shrugged one shoulder and looked anywhere but back at Heechul. "It was a while ago and I don't anymore. Not like that."
"He knew." Heechul sat up and faced Hyukjae, but still kept some distance. "He never said anything, but I think he knew. I knew, of course, but I know everything."
"Oh." Hyukjae wondered if then would be a good time for the Earth to open up and swallow him alive. It was the only decent thing to do.
"You talk about him a lot," said Heechul. "I wasn't sure if you still did."
Hyukjae blinked a few times and felt his face flush with embarrassment. "I didn't notice."
Heechul went quiet, face blank, then lay back down and shut his eyes. "Okay."
"What?" Hyukjae asked, unsure of what had just happened.
"You need to figure out how to be a better teacher," Heechul answered. "Or I'll have to find someone else who knows what they're doing with me."
*
"You've been acting strange lately," Donghae said, joining Hyukjae at the kitchen table where he had been trying to eat a full meal before someone else could come in and take half of it. It had happened several times before. Whenever he ate with anyone else in the group, somehow half of his plate would become theirs and sometimes more than half if he didn't guard it well enough. Someone had even found his hidden stacks of chocolates in case of a food emergency.
"It's true, you have been," added Sungmin, taking the chair on his other side. Hyukjae was slightly shocked to see Sungmin there and it must have shown on his face because Sungmin shrugged and stole a piece of his meat. "Donghae made a convincing argument so I've been helping him watch you."
"I know what I'm talking about," said Donghae around a mouthful of Hyukjae's rice. He leaned in close and Hyukjae could smell his shampoo. It was dark and heavy, unlike Heechul's which was flowery and lingered in his nose all throughout the next day after they'd spent time together. "Is Heechul making you do things you don't want to do? You don't really have to take orders from him; he just tells you that because he knows you will."
"Yeah, I know," Hyukjae responded. He pushed his plate away in defeat when he realized half of it had already been eaten in the previous few minutes where he'd been distracted. "He's not that bad."
Sungmin pressed the back of his hand to Hyukjae's forehead and peered at him worriedly. "You are acting suspicious. I thought Heechul scared you." He took hold of Hyukjae's wrist in his other hand and started checking his pulse, using the clock on the wall to time it.
"He never scared me!" protested Hyukjae, swatting off Sungmin's hands.
"Intimidated," Donghae corrected, grinning at him, smug. "It's all those late nights together, isn't it?"
"Who's spending late nights together?" Eeteuk asked, joining them in the kitchen and rummaging through the refrigerator. "Is this one of those things I should know, but really don't want to?" He pulled out a plastic jar and lifted the lid a little to get a better look at the contents. Immediately he closed the jar again and shoved it as far back into the refrigerator as it would go and moved on to the next container of something unidentifiable.
"Heechul and Hyukjae," said Sungmin, tilting his head up toward Eeteuk. "They've both been sneaking out a night and not getting back until late in the morning."
"Together!" Donghae clarified. "At first it was just Heechul, but then Hyukjae went to follow him and when he got back he told me that he couldn't find Heechul but ever since they've both been sneaking out. Together."
Eeteuk turned around to face them, holding something in a bag that looked like bread except the wrong color, a bowl of what might have been jello if jello was somehow both more liquid and much lumpier, and something that Hyukjae didn't think looked like any kind of food at all. "They have?" He looked at Hyukjae, eyebrow raised in intrigue. "You have?"
"It's nothing!" Hyukjae argued, standing up and pushing his chair back. "Nothing is going on and no one is acting suspicious!"
"I don't think you can judge your own suspiciousness," said Donghae. "There are rules against that. And even if there weren't, how can we trust a suspicious person to tell us whether they are or not being suspicious? Your answer would be questionable at best."
"He's right," agreed Sungmin.
"I'm staying out of it," Eeteuk said, shoving the food-like-products back to wherever they had come from. "But you have been acting odd recently." He sat down at the table and dragged Hyukjae's plate closer to his side and began to eat from it.
*
Hyukjae was confident in his directional skills enough to realize that after nearly an hour of driving, he and Heechul were definitely not even close to the company building, or even still in Seoul. His cheek was pressed to the cool window of Heechul's car as he watched the lights flash by in silence. Not even the radio was on and Heechul hadn't said a word since they'd gotten into the car and Hyukjae wasn't even sure how to start a conversation at that point.
He cleared his throat, opened his mouth to speak, then snapped his jaw shut again, teeth clicking together. He figured it was too late to have any input on where they were going anyway. Surreptitiously, he peeked out of the corner of his eyes to look at Heechul. He studied Heechul for a while as the passing lights from the street illuminated his profile.
"What?" Heechul asked, focused on the road in front of them and giving Hyukjae the impression that he really did know everything.
"Nothing," responded Hyukjae. He looked away.
Finally, Heechul pulled off of the highway and onto a smaller road in what looked to be the middle of nowhere. He stopped the car and got out. "Come on," he said, leaning down to look at Hyukjae through the open car door.
Hyukjae did as he was told and got out of the car quickly. He jogged a few steps to catch up with Heechul who had already begun to walk off in the direction of a small, hard to see pathway. "Where are we?" Hyukjae asked, glancing around nervously. "If you're planning to kill me, make sure Junsu gets my old socks."
"You're an idiot," Heechul reaffirmed. He took hold of Hyukjae's hand and tugged him forward to where the path opened up onto a small playground.
They walked over to the set of swings near the center and each took a seat. The moonlight lit the area well enough that Hyukjae could see Heechul clearly. He watched as Heechul pushed off from the ground, but didn't make any move to keep his momentum until he was eventually stopped again.
"Where are we?" Hyukjae repeated.
"It doesn't matter where we are," answered Heechul. He reached out and grabbed one of the chains holding up Hyukjae's swing and pulled him over to his side. "I decided that we needed a break. All work and no play makes you boring." He tilted his head to the side to regard Hyukjae, and the moonlight hit him perfectly causing his eyes to shine and his hair to sparkle and for a moment Hyukjae forgot who he was with. Then Heechul released his hold on the chain, resulting in Hyukjae swinging rapidly from side to side. "I don't like boring," said Heechul.
Hyukjae dug his heels into the ground to stop his movement, then slowly began to rock the swing back and forth. He turned to Heechul, smiling. "Thank you for bringing me out here. It's really nice."
Even in the darkness, Hyukjae could see Heechul rolling his eyes. "You don't have to make it sound like I never do anything nice. You really are so--" He sighed. "It's what friends do."
If possible, Hyukjae smiled wider. "Yeah." He twisted his swing around so that he could reach Heechul with his foot and push him just hard enough to spin him around.
"Hey!" Heechul yelled, indignant, and scrambled to retaliate.
*
"I think Donghae and Sungmin are right and there is something weird going on with you." Yehsung wrapped an arm around Hyukjae and rested his chin against his shoulder. He smiled for the cameras and winked to the fans outside who's screams had increased at his actions. "I saw you coming in this morning and you were covered in dirt."
Hyukjae waved to the fans as he shrugged Yehsung off of him. "I fell," he said.
"There was sand all over the floor in the hallway and in the bathroom," Yehsung said, taking his seat.
"I fell in a sandbox," Hyukjae amended. "A few times."
Yehsung blinked once, then nodded slowly, trying to absorb the information he had gotten. "A sandbox. You were in a sandbox. It's all so clear now."
"With Heechul," Eeteuk commented. He had been occasionally flipping through the pages going over the things they needed to cover that night and dancing around to the music that they were playing on their radio show and that filled the room. "He was complaining about sand in his shoes when I left. I thought it was a metaphor." Yehsung and Hyukjae turned to him and Eeteuk shrugged.
"We were just spending time together," Hyukjae insisted. "It's what friends do."
Judging from the way Yehsung's eyes widened almost comically, and the way Eeteuk stopped all movement and sat back down in his chair, arms folded and eyebrows raised, Hyukjae thought that maybe he hadn't said the right thing. "What I meant--"
"Friends?" Yehsung inquired, leaning his elbows on the desk and propping his chin up with his hands. "That's new."
"Hyukjae," Eeteuk started, appearing at a loss for words. "Friends? Heechul has a lot of friends, but since when have you been one of them? Not that you aren't a good friend and all, and I like you, you're very nice, but-- And not that I think anyone wouldn't be lucky to count you as a friend. It's just that. With Heechul. What I'm trying to say is." Eeteuk stopped talking.
"It's weird," said Yehsung. "I think he's trying to say that it's weird."
"I don't think--" Hyukjae was cut off again as on of the PDs signaled that they were going back on air and that maybe this time they should try to act somewhat professional or else she would take away all of their toys before they caused any real damage.
Eeteuk and Yehsung took their places for the show, while Hyukjae was left thinking about Heechul and how he could admit that it was maybe a little weird, but that he liked how things were going. Even if he wasn't entirely sure what was going on most of the time and he hadn't gotten a good night's sleep in weeks, but he couldn't seem to really care about that.
Eeteuk kicked him under the desk and Hyukjae remembered where he was and what he was supposed to be doing. He grinned at the fans and slipped easily into his dialogue with Yehsung.
*
"It's not that scary," Heechul said, folding his legs under him and adjusting the blanket so that most of it covered himself, but a little was spared for Hyukjae. "Stop closing your eyes and just watch it."
They'd turned the lights out in the room and were sitting together on the sofa watching a movie that Heechul had picked out and Hyukjae regretted having agreed to watch with him. It was dark and raining and they were all alone, pressed shoulder to shoulder, and watching the dead rise up and slaughter people in a small town that Hyukjae had never heard of before. Occasionally Heechul would shout at the screen when something particularly gruesome was about to happen and he was rooting for the rotting corpse with the axe because clearly the couple who had wandered into that abandoned building were too stupid to live anyway.
Hyukjae partially covered his eyes with his hands as the young, handsome, and rich captain of the soccer team wandered out into the dark and foggy woods to look for his girlfriend who had disappeared in act one. Eaten alive, Hyukjae recalled. He had missed a lot of the plot due to the amount of times he had looked away or covered his ears and shut his eyes, but he had been certain that the young, handsome, and rich soccer captain had been the main character and therefore exempt from a bloody death. As the character on the screen had his throat ripped out by his former science teacher turned mindless zombie, Hyukjae figured he had called that one wrong.
"Oh my God," Hyukjae croaked as the camera zoomed in on the school bully being disemboweled by what remained of the chess team. "Oh my God."
"It's not that bad," Heechul admonished. Blood splattered against the camera lens and the cheerleader with a heart of gold ran through the street, slid on the entrails of the crotchety old town mechanic, and was caught at the last second by the strangely attractive class nerd. "The blood and decapitations aren't that bad," he corrected. "The plot is a little bad."
Hyukjae grabbed what little corner of the blanket that had been bestowed on him and tried to cover his head. "Tell me when people stop getting killed and eaten."
"You're such a little girl," Heechul said, reaching over and yanking the blanket down. "Watch the movie." He neatly tucked the blanket back around Hyukjae's lap, then turned his attention back to the screen just as the the class nerd and the cheerleader with a heart of gold started to run through a cemetery. The decapitated head of the town's former mayor dropped from a tree, causing Hyukjae to shriek and then try to cover his outburst with a cough and desperate hand waving.
"I can't believe that scared you," said Heechul incredulously.
"I'm not scared!" Hyukjae insisted, though his argument was somewhat weak since he had recovered his eyes with his hands. "I'm just... the light hurts my eyes." He could practically feel Heechul laughing at him, not to mention the popcorn that had been thrown at his head.
"It's not that scary," Heechul repeated, flicking another kernel of popcorn at him. "You do know that zombies aren't real, right?"
"Of course I know that." Hyukjae dropped his hands into his lap. He kept his focus on Heechul so he could at least put up a brave front even though he still wanted to hide under the blankets until someone turned the lights back on.
"Good," said Heechul. "Then watch the movie like a grownup."
Hyukjae forced himself to look back at the movie, just in time to see the cheerleader with a heart of gold get her limbs torn off in a dark shed where blood was dripping from the ceiling.
*
Consciousness returned to Hyukjae slowly. Sounds were slightly muted and his arms and legs felt numb and warm and he could have easily fallen back asleep, except that the voices in the room became more and more distinct and he found himself waking up just a little more as he couldn't stop listening to whoever was talking. He also realized that the reason his right arm felt numb was because it was completely asleep.
"Should we wake them up?" someone asked, voice somewhat low as if they were trying to be quiet, but not doing a very good job of it. "They look comfortable." It sounded like Shindong.
"I need to find my camera first," came a second voice, snickering. Hyukjae vaguely recognized it as belonging to Kyuhyun.
"That's a good idea," said Donghae, instantly recognizable, even when Hyukjae was having a hard time remembering his own name.
"No," another voice whispered vehemently. "No cameras, no-- is that water? No throwing water on anyone. All of you leave." Definitely Eeteuk.
Hyukjae began to drift off again as he listened to the sound of shuffled footsteps retreating out of the room.
"Hey," said Eeteuk, prodding him in the shoulder with his bony fingers. "Wake up."
"Go away," mumbled Heechul. He shifted a little, jostling Hyukjae due to their probable close proximity to each other.
Hyukjae could feel Heechul's fingers pressed lightly to his hip and he cracked an eye open to see just where they were. "Oh," he said, hurrying to sit up and nearly colliding with Eeteuk who had been bent over them. "Sorry. I. Sorry." Sometime during the night Hyukjae had fallen asleep and had ended up nearly completely sprawled on top of Heechul. "I think I drooled on your shirt."
Heechul glanced down at his chest, tugging at his shirt to get a better look at it. He rubbed at his eyes a few times, stretched, and sat up slowly. "I was going to push you onto to the ground when you fell asleep on me, but you're really heavy." He stood up, wrapped the blanket around himself, and started off toward the bathroom. "You owe me a new shirt," he called back.
Eeteuk took Heechul's place next to Hyukjae on the sofa. "Do I want to know what is going on?"
"If you find out, tell me," said Hyukjae.
*
"Shouldn't we be working on your dance technique? Improving your skills? Mastering the basics of male-oriented routines?" Hyukjae questioned, watching Heechul shuffle the deck of cards with an experienced hand.
"What?" Heechul paused momentarily, then resumed his way of shuffling the cards that was usually reserved for pros and people who were going to take your money one way or another. "Oh, right. Maybe next time. Tonight we play cards."
"But," Hyukjae leaned back against the cool mirrored wall of the practice room, "why did we have to come all the way over here?" He pulled his knees to his chest and yawned. "If we stopped sneaking out then everyone, and especially Donghae, would stop saying I've been acting suspicious. They all know they we've been leaving together."
"That's because you're not very good at hiding things," Heechul cut in.
"I can hide things! It's only that this time...I couldn't," Hyukjae floundered. "And if we aren't here to practice, then why can't we just stay back with everyone else or invite them along."
Heechul dropped the deck of cards he had been holding and they scattered over the floor. "Because," Heechul said. "It's not about dancing and it never was. I like my time alone whenever I can get it, but then you-- you are such an idiot. I knew how you felt about Donghae and I knew how he felt about you, but then--"
Faster than Hyukjae could comprehend, he was being pushed to the ground with Heechul above him and Heechul's lips against his own in a kiss. Heechul's hands were pressed to his, their fingers laced together. Someone's heartbeat thudded against their ribcage, but Hyukjae couldn't tell who it was. He guessed it was probably his own.
Then it was over and Heechul pulled away and sat back on his heels. Hyukjae took a few shallow breaths, unable to think, then took in a deep shuddering gulp of air. He lifted himself up onto his elbows and tried to speak. "I--"
"We should go," said Heechul, standing up. "I should go. Clean up, will you?" He didn't wait for an answer before he was out of the door, leaving Hyukjae alone.
*
Donghae approached Hyukjae in the hallway outside of a show they were recording together, that was currently taking a break for a set change. He slung his arm around Hyukjae's neck. "Did something happen the other night? You've been acting off for days. Like your world has spun off its axis and about to go crashing into the sun."
Hyukjae poked Donghae in the ribs. "I'm fine," he said, smiling. "Since when have you paid so much attention to me? Don't you have anything better to do?"
Donghae shrugged. "Since always, and no. This recording and bothering you have filled my entire schedule for the rest of the day, and some of tomorrow as well. You should feel lucky to have my undivided attention. Not many get such an honor."
"Yeah," said Hyukjae. "Really lucky. Thank you for showing me the light. My world was darkness until you came along and filled it with your nagging and light." His phone buzzed in his pocket as he spoke, disrupting the flow of his dramatic statement.
"That's been happening all day! Who keeps messaging you?" asked Donghae, removing his arm from around Hyukjae and standing back.
"I don't know," Hyukjae replied, trying to sound uninterested, though he feared that Donghae would hear the tense tone of his voice. "It's probably nothing important." He tried to brush off Donghae's curiosity.
"You don't know that," said Donghae, reaching into Hyukjae's pocket before Hyukjae could get away or even change the subject. He brandished the phone with a flourish. "You should check."
Nervously, Hyukjae flipped open his phone and looked at the text messages he'd been getting for the past hour. All of them were from Heechul and none of them were anything he wanted to read. He scanned them anyway.
We need to talk. --Heechul
11:09am
I have to explain some things and I just want you to listen. --Heechul
11:15am
Meet me in my room tonight. --Heechul
11:23am
I don't know your schedule, but I'll wait up. --H
11:30am
You have to be here. --H
11:41am
I just want to talk.
12:03pm
"So," Donghae tried to catch a glimpse of what was written. "Anything important? Life or death? About to careen into some kind of inferno, such as the sun? You do look a little wobbly." He put a comforting hand on Hyukjae's shoulder and stared at him with sincere concern showing on his face. "If something happened, you can tell me. You know that, right?"
"No...it's nothing," replied Hyukjae, pocketing his phone once again. He steadied himself mentally and tried not to think about Heechul because he didn't know what to think about Heechul. He was confused and somehow every thought he'd had lately had lead him back to thoughts of Heechul and even more confusion. "I'm just tired and I forgot some of the script for later."
"Okay," Donghae accepted that answer, though it was a few moments before he nodded and grinned. "Okay." He started marching off down the hallway a few paces, then turned around and walked backward. "Hey, let's go somewhere tonight. You've been neglecting me lately. I've just decided that and I am very hurt. You will buy me food and there will be merriment. Perhaps there will also be fun and games. Likely a close encounter with some fans, seeing as they are everywhere. Are you up for it?"
Hyukjae laughed and fell into stride next to Donghae as they began to walk back toward the recording studio together. "Sure, except for the part where you think I will be paying for food."
*
A night out with Donghae was exactly what Hyukjae had needed to take his mind off of all the things he didn't understand lately. Especially since the moment they stepped out of the car and into the mall that was rather unfortunately crowded with teenagers for a school night, they were spotted by fans and he didn't have time to think of anything besides escape. The group of young girls never approached them, however they followed close behind and snapped pictures every few seconds. Every few minutes one of them would yell out a marriage proposal and the others would giggle.
"You said we wouldn't need disguises," Hyukjae whispered heatedly, pulling his hat lower in a futile attempt to make him look like someone else. "You said there wouldn't be a lot of people here!"
Donghae tugged his own cap a little lower. "And you listened to me. After all these years, I can't believe you haven't learned anything." He grasped Hyukjae's arm at the elbow and started walking briskly toward the other end of the building. The girls behind them matched their pace.
They started to walk faster and faster until they were in a full out run and Hyukjae wished he had worn better shoes.
"This way," Donghae made a sharp turn around a corner, dragging Hyukjae with him. They ducked into the aquarium on their right. "Two, please," said Donghae, handing over some money and grabbing the tickets before the woman at the counter even figured out what had just happened. He pulled Hyukjae inside where it was dark and nearly empty and would be a little harder to follow them.
"That was fun." Donghae let go of Hyukjae's arm and turned to him with a wide grin. "We should do this more often. Make it a weekly thing."
Hyukjae opened and closed his mouth, failing to find the right words. "No," he settled on.
"Fine," said Donghae, still grinning and looking far too amused. "I want to get pictures with the fish." He wandered off further into the aquarium leaving Hyukjae to trail behind him.
*
After nearly an hour, they'd only made it to around the halfway point because every few feet Donghae would pause in front of a fish tank to pose and take pictures of himself. Occasionally he would drag Hyukjae into the shot and more often than not, they'd both end up trying to imitate the fish for the photo. It was a long process in which Donghae would smush Hyukjae's cheeks together, tell him he wasn't doing it right, but end up taking the picture anyway and then laughing at how silly they both looked.
"I've figured out what's going on with you and Heechul," Donghae said, pressing his forehead to the glass that separated them from a cage of bats to try to get a better look. "I've known you both for a long time, so it was easy when I thought about it."
"I don't understand," said Hyukjae, shifting from foot to foot.
Donghae turned back around to face him and cocked his head to the side curiously. "You don't?"
Hyukjae shook his head No. "What did you figure out?"
Donghae smiled fondly and linked his arm with Hyukjae's and bumped their shoulders together. "You're a little slow sometimes," he said. He glanced around them for a moment, then drew Hyukjae over to a darker corner where even if someone did walk into the room, they wouldn't be able to see the two of them.
Donghae sighed softly, looked around one more time, leaned in and kissed Hyukjae on the lips. Hyukjae's eyes widened and he pulled back abruptly. "I--"
"You're one of my best friends," said Donghae. "I love you, but. It wouldn't have worked. I want you to be my best friend until we're old and our hair is grey and all of this is just a memory that we talk about all of the time to anyone who will listen. I want you to be my best friend forever."
Hyukjae reach down to hold Donghae's hands and rested his head on Donghae's shoulder. "Yeah, I get that now. I want that, too."
"Good," Donghae said. "I'm still not going to tell you what I figured out, though."
Hyukjae shoved him playfully. "I've changed my mind. I want a new best friend," he called back, marching further into the aquarium.
Donghae skipped after him, laughing, and threw his arms around Hyukjae's neck from behind. "Too late; you're stuck with me. Who else is going to keep you sane?"
Hyukjae struggled against Donghae's hold, unable to get him to let go. "I don't think that's the right word for what you do," he noted.
*
They went their separate ways when they got back to the apartment building. Hyukjae went up to his apartment, while Donghae hung around the lobby talking to Kibum who had been on his way out, back to where he lived. Inside, Sungmin and Kyuhyun were engaged in a video game battle. Ryeowook stood over them and was trying to coerce them both into going to sleep because they were loud and he wanted to sleep and if they didn't agree to at least be quiet then he'd take the game system and drop it from the roof.
Sungmin and Kyuhyun both gave half-hearted, distracted mutters of agreement, which was apparently enough for Ryeowook who trudged out of the room yawning. He gave a small wave at Hyukjae when he passed by.
Hyukjae walked over to Sungmin and Kyuhyun and sat down next to them on the floor. "How long have you been playing?" he asked.
"A few hours. Kibum was here for a while, but he had to leave," Sungmin replied, not taking his eyes away from the screen.
"He was just mad that I beat his high score," said Kyuhyun.
"They're both mad that I wiped the floor with them," Sungmin added cheerfully. He hit a few buttons and one of the players in the game flew through the air after being punched by the other guy.
Kyuhyun jabbed at the buttons on the controller to counterattack. "Beginners luck," he grumbled.
Hyukjae was about to say something to that when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out without thinking and checked the message.
Are you coming?
1:52am
He hit the power button and shoved the phone back into his pocket. "I'm going to sleep," he said, straightening up.
*
Hyukjae yawned, rubbed at his eyes with his palms, and mentally tried to slow time so he could stay in bed and sleep longer. Maybe if he had another few hours, he thought, he could actually even fall asleep. Instead his alarm went off, piercing the quiet of his bedroom with its loud beeps.
He rolled over, nearly falling out of bed, too tired to properly move his legs, and trudged into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He'd only just gotten the toothbrush in his mouth when the door, not even fully closed, slammed open and ricochet off the adjoining wall.
"If you weren't going to show up, the least you could have done was tell me!" Heechul yelled, gripping the door-frame. "I waited for you for hours and this morning I find out they you were out with Donghae all night." He seemed to deflate at that. "You should have told me." Gently, Heechul shut the door and leaned back against it.
"I--" Hyukjae paused and spit out the mouthful of toothpaste into the sink and set down his toothbrush. "I didn't think." The stood their in silence for a while. Hyukjae shifted to rest his hip against the sink and tried to refrain from fidgeting anymore than that, though it was difficult. He was nervous and didn't know what to say and he wished Heechul was still yelling at him instead of staring down at the floor. Hyukjae didn't know how to deal with Heechul in that kind of situation. Though, if he were perfectly honest with himself, he clearly didn't know how to deal with Heechul at all.
"I'm not Donghae," Heechul said, looking up from the floor and straight at Hyukjae. "I'm not like him at all."
Hyukjae nodded his head, not sure if there was something he should be saying. "I know that."
"Nothing was supposed to happen," Heechul continued as if Hyukjae hadn't even spoken. "I was going to stop feeling anything for you, because I didn't want to, because you have a funny smile and you're so stupid, because... But then you showed up that night and you stuck around and I thought. Sometimes you would look at me the way I wanted you to, and I thought..."
Heechul turned his back to Hyukjae. "I liked spending time with you, without you being afraid of me," he said, opening the door. "That's what I was going to say last night."
Hyukjae stood still as he listened to Heechul's retreating footsteps. His breath was caught in his throat and he was fighting the desire to run after Heechul or to crumple to the ground. After a few more seconds, he heard the front door open and shut and then he began to move. He walked out into the hallway and in the direction of Sungmin's room. He opened the door quietly and slipped inside, noting that the other bed in the room was empty.
Carefully, he crawled into Sungmin's bed and pressed himself against Sungmin with little thought about waking him up. "I heard yelling. Was that Heechul?" Sungmin asked, cracking one eye open. "Hey, what's wrong?" He wiped at Hyukjae's eyes and wrapped an arm around his waist. "What happened? Hyukjae, are you crying?"
Hyukjae buried his head against Sungmin's neck. "I don't know," he said.
*
"You're an idiot," Donghae said, sitting down next to Hyukjae in the gated parking lot of the building where they were recording for a talk show. Eeteuk and Kangin were still inside of the building somewhere, probably trying to sort out why they were running so far behind schedule. It was only the four of them that day, and Hyukjae was glad about it. Even more so when he found he had time to wander off alone instead of having to deal with questions and cameras. Though it would have been nice to know the right answer to something for once.
"I'm starting to agree with that," Hyukjae said, ducking his head down and staring raptly at his shoes. He had hoped that he'd managed to get out of the building without Donghae seeing where he was going because he knew that Donghae would want to talk.
"Whatever happened with Heechul--"
"He kissed me," Hyukjae interrupted, blushing, and trying to hide his face from Donghae even more.
"Oh," said Donghae. "Yeah, I guessed it was something like that. Well, maybe not that, exactly, but I know he cares about you a lot. That's what I figured out the other day. He's been acting as if nothing is wrong these last few days, but I know him and I know you. And I know that you're both being stupid." He tilted to the side so they were shoulder to shoulder. "You need to fix this."
Hyukjae sighed. "I don't know how. He wanted to talk before, but I was afraid to face him and now we aren't talking at all. I want to make things right, but I'm afraid I'm just going to make things worse. I don't know what to do."
"That's because you're an idiot," Donghae pointed out. "First you should try figuring out how you feel about Heechul and go from there. I know that you care about him, so just expand on that. Even if you don't feel the same way he does, he still deserves to hear it from you." He reached over and took hold of Hyukjae's hand. "The worst thing that could happen already has."
"You're right," said Hyukjae. He held onto Donghae's hand and stared at their fingers laced together. "When did you get so wise?"
"I've always been this way," Donghae sniffed. "It's just taken you this long to notice."
*
Hyukjae sat on the edge of his bed, stood up, walked forward a few feet, turned around and sat back down. He stood back up and repeated his actions. "Do I like Heechul?" He asked the empty room. "Maybe. No. Maybe." He flopped backward onto his bed and pulled his pillow over his face. "Yes," he said, voiced muffled.
He sat up, hugging the pillow to his chest. "Maybe." Hyukjae was aware that if anyone else was in the room they'd likely be telling him to stop acting like a little girl, prompting him to check the door just to make sure that he had locked it. Secure in the knowledge that he wouldn't be walked in on while talking to himself, he spun on his heel and paced the room back and forth. After a minute or two of that he collapsed back onto the bed with a heavy sigh.
"Yes," he announced. "Maybe."
Without thinking, Hyukjae unlocked his door and marched out of his bedroom and out of the apartment. It was when he was riding the elevator up to the next floor that he remembered he was wearing pajamas that didn't even look like his own, and barefoot. "This is a bad idea," he said, right as the doors slid open and he saw that Heechul was standing on the other side. "Oh, hi," he managed to say after a moment of surprise.
"Are you getting out?" Heechul asked. "I have somewhere to--"
"No, wait," Hyukjae cut in. "I...Can we talk?"
Heechul's mouth was pressed in a thin line and Hyukjae was afraid that he'd refuse him. "Okay," he said finally. He turned around and headed back inside the apartment. Nervously, Hyukjae followed a few steps behind him.
"Talk," Heechul said, shutting his bedroom door.
Hyukjae stood in the middle of the room, terrified of what was going to come out of his mouth. He wished he had thought about it more, or prepared some kind of speech, or even asked Donghae for more guidance and wisdom. "The other day, I shouldn't have avoided you. I'm sorry," he said, deciding that was the best way to start.
"Is that all?" Heechul put his hand on the doorknob.
"No," Hyukjae rushed over to keep Heechul from leaving. He pressed his hand to Heechul's over the doorknob. "No, I...I don't understand you," he said, dropping his hand. "You intimidate me sometimes, but I like being around you. And I like the idea of you liking me and Donghae told me that I need to fix this, but I don't know how and I'm afraid that I can't because I'm probably going to say the wrong thing. I like you, though." Hyukjae snapped his mouth closed, unsure where all of that had come from.
"Alright," Heechul said, not moving.
"I guess I'll just go now." Hyukjae started toward the door, but in a flash Heechul had him pinned against the wall.
"That took you a long time to figure out," he said, lips just above Hyukjae's. "I was beginning to think you never would. Don't do that again."
Hyukjae nodded vigorously, eyes wide. "Yeah."
Heechul smiled, bright and genuine. "Good." He kissed Hyukjae, soft and warm and completely different from the one before. "Are those your clothes?" Heechul asked, pulling back to kiss up Hyukjae's jaw then down his neck.
"I think they're Sungmin's," he answered distractedly, tilting his head back. His sharp intake of air was involuntary as he felt Heechul press his knee between his legs.
"Take them off," Heechul said, trailing his fingers up under Hyukjae's shirt and tracing his ribcage.
"What?" Hyukjae would have jumped back if there had been any room behind him. Instead he blinked at Heechul, startled. "You-- what?."
Heechul rolled his eyes, and stepped away from Hyukjae just far enough to have room to pull his own shirt over his head. "Now you," he said. He rubbed his hands lightly over Hyukjae's hips, but made no other moves.
Hyukjae could feel himself blushing from head to toe as he pulled the drawstring on his pants, loosening them enough to fall to the floor. His shirt came off next as he tossed it off to the side and tried to look anywhere but at Heechul, completely aware that he was standing in his underwear and all he wanted was for Heechul to touch him.
He felt himself being tugged closer to Heechul, and then they were kissing again, except this time it was more heated. Heechul bit lightly against Hyukjae's lips and ran his fingernails down his back. Hyukjae ran his hands over the flat planes of Heechul's stomach, before slowly unbuttoning his jeans without his hands shaking.
Heechul smirked against his mouth and lead him backward until Hyukjae's felt the back of his legs hit Heechul's bed. He fell back against it and Heechul crawled on top of him, kissing his lips, neck, and taking one of Hyukjae's hands in his own. With his other hand, he reached down and pressed gently against Hyukjae's erection. Hyukjae shuddered, a soft moan escaping him.
He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on breathing as he felt Heechul pull his underwear, exposing him completely. Then Heechul's warmth was gone. Hyukjae opened his eyes, trying to focus, only to see Heechul's mouth hovering over his cock and dart his tongue out to lick at the slit. He squeezed at Heechul's hand that was still locked to his. He dropped his head back down to the mattress, too overwhelmed with the feeling of Heechul sucking leisurely on the head of his cock.
Something warm and slick was wiped against his inner thigh, but before Hyukjae had any time to think about it he cried out sharp and shocked as Heechul slid a finger into him. "Oh, God," Hyukjae breathed out.
Heechul shifted slightly and kissed Hyukjae's hip. "No, but I like that." He moved his finger in and out slowly, then added another and another until Hyukjae is canting his hips against Heechul's hand.
"Please," he said, voice cracking.
Heechul pressed another kiss to his hip before sliding his fingers out. He positioned himself above Hyukjae, pressing Hyukjae's knee up as Hyukjae wrapped his other leg around Heechul's waist. "Please," Hyukjae he repeated, tightening his hold on Heechul's hand and running his fingers through the soft hairs at the back of his neck.
Heechul entered him slowly, causing Hyukjae to whine faintly in the back of his throat. He wriggled his hips, attempting to pull Heechul in further. The slow pace didn't last long. Heechul began to fuck him, hard, and bite against his collarbone, meaning to mark. Hyukjae pumped his own cock in time to Heechul's thrusts until he came, spilling into his own hand and crying out. It didn't take long for Heechul to follow him over the edge, rolling his hips a few last times to ride out his orgasm.
"I don't think I can move," said Hyukjae, having finally caught his breath and idly running his fingers along Heechul's spine as Heechul continued to bite and suck against neck.
"Good," Heechul said.
*
Hyukjae woke up surrounded by warmth and with a pleasant sort of fog in his brain.
"You snore," Heechul mumbled, mouth pressed against the back of his neck.
Hyukjae flailed his limbs wildly, momentarily confused and disoriented. He landed on the floor tangled in Heechul's blankets. Heechul looked down at him, over the side of the bed. "Good morning," he said.
"Hi," replied Hyukjae, brain finally catching up with him.
Heechul reached a hand out to him. "Coming back up here?"
Hyukjae took hold of Heechul's hand and pulled himself back up and into the bed, dragging the blankets with him. "Yeah," he said, wrapping a leg around Heechul. He tucked his head under Heechul's chin and closed his eyes. "Good morning."
Heechul/Hyukjae (Donghae, Hyukjae)
humor, angst, romance, fluff
NC-17
late late late birthday!fic for shieldkitten. I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS. IT KILLED ME DEAD. IT'S NOT AT ALL LIKE WHAT YOU WANTED. BUT I GOT THE PAIRING RIGHT. ALSO, PORN. (akjsdlkajdslj ;_; never again.)
"Heechul has been going out late at night," Donghae said, throwing himself onto the sofa and propping his feet up on Hyukjae's lap; careful not to drop what he was carrying. "It's suspicious, don't you think?"
Hyukjae hit the power button on the television remote, giving up on what he had hoped would be quiet Hyukjae time, and looked over at Donghae. "What?"
Donghae had set down most of the half-dozen bottles he had brought in with him and was currently emptying the contents of one of them into a metal bowl that he'd placed in his lap. Held under his right arm was a hat that Hyukjae was almost certain didn't belong to Donghae at all. It looked like one of Shiwon's. "Heechul; he's been acting suspicious," repeated Donghae.
"Oh," said Hyukjae, grabbing for the television and planning to go back to what he had been doing. "I haven't noticed anything different."
Donghae stared at him as if he were a little slow. "Of course you haven't. He only goes out at night when everyone else is busy or sleeping." Donghae picked up a small bottle full of a dark blue liquid, and poured it into the bowl that had been filled with what looked to Hyukjae like shampoo. He started mixing them together with his fingers.
"Oh," said Hyukjae. "Do you know why?"
"No! He won't tell me, which is even more suspicious, if you ask me. He tells me things." Donghae sat up straight and nearly upturned the bowl and all of its contents. "What if he's gotten into some kind of trouble and needs my help but is too afraid to ask? Or what if he's going out every night to gamble all of his money away? It's an addiction, Hyukjae. Or what if it's a fan who is blackmailing him into dating her and soon it will be a big scandal because she's carrying his child and Heechul has to move out to the country and become a farmer and raise a family of children with a woman who wants him to sing Miracle all the time? Have you thought of that?"
Hyukjae blinked slowly. "No, I don't think I've ever thought of any of that before in my life."
Donghae rolled his eyes. "That's why you're always so unprepared, you know." He painstakingly began pouring the now dark-blue mixture back into the original bottles he'd brought with him which, upon second look, were actually shampoo bottles. "I think what we'll have to do is follow Heechul. Tonight."
Hyukjae looked away from Donghae's blue-tinged fingertips and up to his dark brown eyes, hoping he had misheard. "Wait, what?"
"Tonight," said Donghae, screwing the caps back onto the bottles. "We'll sneak out after Heechul and find out what he's up to. I already have a plan, too. I'll go upstairs and wait for him to leave, and then I will call you and we can meet in the lobby and follow him in the shadows. It'll be easy." Never in his life had Hyukjae thought he'd be even halfway decent at stealth. And Donghae's plan left much to be desired, as well.
Hyukjae opened and closed his mouth a few times, unable to think up any appropriate response to Donghae's clear and unfortunate madness. "Why me?"
Donghae waved a hand over the odd assortment of things he'd carried in with him and gave a lopsided grin. "I didn't have time to find anything of yours, so you are the only one I can trust right now." He flipped over the hat that Hyukjae had nearly forgotten about and held up a large packet of glitter. "I was bored."
Oh, thought Hyukjae. "Oh."
*
Donghae had gone back to his own apartment nearly two hours earlier, and Hyukjae had successfully put all of Donghae's weird ideas and crazy schemes out of his mind. He had just changed into his pajamas and was about to crawl into bed when his phone rang and he had to fish it out from somewhere deep in his pile of dirty clothes.
"Heechul is leaving! Go follow him down to the lobby," Donghae practically yelled through the phonelines.
Hyukjae started to form a response along the lines of "No; sleeping!" but Donghae cut him off before even the first word left his mouth.
"Go," he said. "Now! Hyukjae, we have to find out the truth."
"Fine," Hyukjae sighed, shutting his phone and trying not to think too hard on the fact that he'd be attempting to sneak around the city in his pajamas, or that he was tired and just wanted to go to bed, or even that he was pretty sure he'd vowed some time ago never to listen to Donghae ever again.
As quietly as he could, Hyukjae put on his shoes and slipped out of the apartment. He pressed the button for the elevator and too late realized that might not have been the best idea when the doors slid open and Heechul was standing there giving him a none-too-friendly look. Hyukjae just stood there, staring, like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.
The doors started to close, but Heechul stuck his hand out to stop them, never once looking away from Hyukjae. "Are you getting on?" he asked.
"Yes? Yes! I have...things. I have to do things. Now," Hyukjae replied, trying to sound casual and not at all like the world's very worst ninja he could possibly be. He stepped inside the elevator and immediately his phone started to ring again.
"Hyukjae?" Donghae whispered, "change of plans. You're going to have to go by yourself. Hankyung is staging an inquiry about his blue-tinged hair. If you ask me, it's not that ba--" The line cut off. Hyukjae wondered if he should be at least a little worried.
The rest of the short ride down to the lobby was spent in silence. When the doors finally opened again, Heechul walked out without saying another word to Hyukjae. He head out the front of the building with Hyukjae trailing behind as best as he could without being too obvious. Hyukjae hid behind some bushes as he watched Heechul walk down the sidewalk toward the main road where he hailed a taxi, forgoing his own car.
Without even thinking, Hyukjae ran toward the street and waved over the first available taxi he saw. "Follow that car!" he said before he was even fully in the backseat. The cab driver looked at Hyukjae in his rearview mirror, then ahead toward the taxi Heechul was in, then back to Hyukjae.
"Please?" Hyukjae tried.
The cab driver sighed heavily, but pulled away from the curb and started driving after Heechul.
*
"Stop!" cried Hyukjae. "Stop here." He ducked lower in the backseat of the taxi and pressed his face against the window, watching as Heechul got out of his cab in front of SM's main office building in Seoul. The taxi Hyukjae was in pulled up to the curb at the corner across the small side street. They idled there as Hyukjae watched Heechul walk toward the back entrance, nod to the security guard on duty, and head inside the back entrance.
The cab driver eyed Hyukjae wearily while tapping his fingers roughly against the steering-wheel.
"Er," Hyukjae said, when he was pretty sure it was safe to get out without being spotted. "Thanks." He pulled out all the cash he'd brought with him, handed it over without even looking at the meter, and scrambled out onto the sidewalk as fast as he could. He was positive he'd over-payed by at least double, but he couldn't help but feel a little judged by the other man. And to make it worse, Hyukjae was pretty sure he deserved that judgement. Only a lunatic would be sneaking around at night in their pajamas chasing after another man for no other reason than they were told to by an equally crazy person.
Swiftly, Hyukjae crossed the small street and crept around to the back entrance of the building. The security guard noticed him almost immediately and raised an eyebrow at Hyukjae's poorly concealed approach.
Hyukjae straightened up, stepped out of the shadows, and attempted to make himself appear less awkward than he felt. "Hi. I'm just here too-" He waved his arms around a little to express something innocent and not at all like stalking. "I'll just go in."
The security guard nodded and stepped out of the way so Hyukjae could pass.
*
It didn't take nearly as long to find the room Heechul was in as Hyukjae had thought. Mostly because Heechul happened to be in the first room he checked, but that was overlookable. Hyukjae quietly opened the door a small fraction and peered inside.
Heechul was in the room with the music turned up high enough so even if Hyukjae made any kind of noise, Heechul probably wouldn't hear him. The song changed to a different one with a faster beat and Heechul closed his eyes and started to dance. His movements were awkward and stiff and Hyukjae thought he looked like he was off a beat every few steps.
After a minute or so, Hyukjae felt as if he were intruding on something he really shouldn't be seeing and he tried very, very hard to leave without getting caught, except he wasn't nearly lucky enough for that. He caught his foot on the bottom of his pants, lost his balance and tried to regain it by clinging to the door, but instead he tripped over his own foot and went crashing to the ground. The door slammed open behind him to add emphasis to his graceful arrival, if him being sprawled out on the floor wasn't obvious enough for Heechul.
"What are you doing here?" Heechul ground out, teeth clenched. He stormed over to Hyukjae and pulled him up until they were standing face to face. "Did you follow me?"
"No! Yes. Maybe?" Hyukjae tried to take a step back, but Heechul had a firm grip on the collar of his shirt. "It was Donghae's idea!"
Heechul's eyes widened and he pushed Hyukjae out of the way so he could look out of the room. "Is Donghae here?" He asked, turning back to Hyukjae.
Hyukjae shook his head. "No, he made me come alone." Hyukjae realized how stupid he sounded, but he saw how Heechul relaxed slightly at his answer.
"Good," Heechul said. "He can't keep a secret. And you," Heechul once again grabbed hold of Hyukjae collar in a firm grip. "If you tell anyone I will never stop hurting you."
Hyukjae swallowed, or at least tried to, but he found that his throat had gone dry and his pulse had sped up and he feared he was about to have a heart attack.
Heechul sighed, rolling his eyes. "You're so easy," he said, letting go of Hyukjae. "I wouldn't actually hurt you, you know."
"Oh," Hyukjae answered.
"But if you tell anyone, I will make your life miserable," added Heechul, turning away.
"Oh," said Hyukjae, voice coming out hoarse. He swallowed again and took a deep breath. "Um. I saw you. Before. I could help you, if you want. If you're trying to improve, that is. I could...help," he finished lamely.
Heechul cocked his head to the side and gazed over at Hyukjae. "Okay," he said, after a moment of consideration. "But you can't tell anyone. If everyone started to think that I care about these things, they'd want me to try harder more often. I like where I'm at most of the time." His features hardened. "This is a secret you will take to your grave."
Hyukjae's eyes widened and he nodded his head vigorously. "Okay," he repeated.
*
The next day, Hyukjae was woken up by Donghae throwing himself onto his bed, stealing all of his blankets, and pressing his ice-cold feet against Hyukjae's bare skin. "So, what did you find out last night?" Donghae asked.
Without even opening his eyes, Hyukjae tried to simultaneously push Donghae off of his bed and steal back his blankets because he was cold and Donghae had his own bed somewhere else. He was successful in neither area, and somehow ended up loosing his pillow too. "Go away," he mumbled, rolling over.
"Tell me what happened," Donghae insisted, poking Hyukjae in the ribs.
"Nothing happened, I couldn't find him. Give me back my pillow," Hyukjae said.
Donghae curled up against Hyukjae's back and moved the pillow around so they were sharing it. "Really?"
"Yes," replied Hyukjae, wriggling around a little to get more comfortable.
"Too bad," said Donghae. He adjusted the blankets so that they were wrapped around both of them. "I bet it's something interesting, too."
"Yeah," Hyukjae breathed out, content, and already falling back asleep.
*
Hyukjae was once again sat in front of the television trying to enjoy a movie during what was supposed to have been quiet Hyukjae time, but instead he was joined by Donghae and Sungmin and somehow his alone time had turned into something entirely different altogether. Sungmin was lying down with his head resting in Donghae's lap and Hyukjae had been relegated to footstool duty for a second time.
"Weird how?" Sungmin asked, tilting his head back to look up at Donghae. "Maybe he's just tired lately. More than usual. You could also be imagining things."
"That one gets my vote," said Hyukjae. He tried to discreetly turn the volume up on the television, but was caught by Donghae who grabbed the remote from his hands and shut it off. Hyukjae flopped back against the sofa in defeat.
"Weird like, you know, weird," said Donghae in response to Sungmin's question. "Suspicious. Hyukjae tried to follow Heechul a few nights ago, but it didn't work."
"Oh," Sungmin said, as if it were perfectly natural for Hyukjae to fail at something.
"Hey-" Hyukjae started to say before he was cut off when the front door slammed open.
"Hyukjae!" Heechul called out, practically running over to them. "You're coming with me." He grabbed hold of Hyukjae's wrist and tugged him up into a standing position.
Donghae and Sungmin stared up at the two of them in confusion. "Why are you taking Hyukjae?" Donghae asked, having regained his senses after the initial shock of seeing Heechul.
"He owes me food," Heechul answered easily. He started walking toward the door, fingers still wrapped around Hyukjae's wrist.
"Bring back something for us!" Sungmin called after them right as they reached the front door.
*
"If you wanted me to come with you, you could have just asked instead of making something up," Hyukjae said, finally, as they stood inside one of the dance practice rooms in the early hours of the morning. "I wouldn't have said no."
Heechul gazed at him for a moment or two, quiet and contemplating, before the corners of his mouth turned up and he smacked Hyukjae on the back of the head. "I think it's time for a break," he said, hitting the power button on the music system and picking up his water bottle. He sat down, back against the mirrored wall and after a second, Hyukjae joined him.
"Thanks," said Heechul. "For doing this and keeping it a secret." He didn't look at Hyukjae, but instead stared intensely at the far side of the room. "You didn't have to."
"It's no problem," Hyukjae responded, barely managing not to stumble over his words. "We're in this group together and I'd do anything for all of the members." He grinned, thinking back to Donghae suspecting something weird going on. "Donghae thinks you're being blackmailed by one of the fans into dating her," he said. "It's all he's been talking about for days and he's determined to get to the bottom of it."
Heechul took a sip from of his water and asked, "Do you like him?" lips still pressed to the rim of the bottle.
"What?" Hyukjae choked a bit on the air in his lungs and sat up so fast he knocked into Heechul causing him to spill some of his water over his face and chest. "Sorry," he said, patting Heechul down in a pathetic attempt to fix what he'd done. His eyes lingered for a moment at where Heechul's white shirt had become nearly transparent and was clinging to his skin. Hyukjae looked away, hoping Heechul hadn't noticed. "It was an accident. Sorry."
Heechul carefully screwed the lid back onto the bottle and set it down, out of the way, and tried to wipe the water off of his chin with the bottom of his shirt. "Do you like Donghae," he asked again after sufficiently drying himself.
Hyukjae could feel his face turning red in embarrassment. "No! I mean, everyone like's Donghae, but I. No. Not like...that. I mean. Not that. It's just that everyone likes Donghae."
Heechul's lips were pressed in a tight line and Hyukjae wondered if he had said the wrong thing for the millionth time in his life. "Do you like Donghae?"
Heechul smacked him on the back of his head again, then stood up. "You're an idiot. Break's over; make me a better dancer like you said you would."
"Sure, yeah," replied Hyukjae, going to turn the music back on.
"And this time, show me the moves slowly so I know what I'm supposed to do," Heechul added. "Not everyone is born with the ability to flail their limbs in rhythm and call it dancing like you do."
*
Almost the entire group were backstage before an interview and Hyukjae was resting his head against Eeteuk's shoulder. He was trying to sleep while listening to Eeteuk and Kangin talk softly between themselves. As he neared an almost completely unconscious state, he felt something cold press against his neck, causing him to snap his eyes open, sit up straight, and look wildly around the room.
"Here," Heechul said, waving a can of juice in front of his face, almost hitting him on the nose. "Take it."
Hyukjae blinked a few times before cautiously accepting the drink from Heechul's outstretched hand. "Thank you," he mumbled, still not entirely sure what was going on or why Heechul was giving him things when it wasn't exactly in his nature to do so. Especially to Hyukjae who wasn't quite sure if he was really still asleep.
Heechul sighed loudly. "I had extra change."
"Oh, um." Hyukjae looked around and saw that nearly everyone else in the room was watching them intently. Donghae looked to be pantomiming something behind Shindong and Sungmin seemed to be nodding in agreement to whatever it was. "Thank you anyway. You didn't have to," he finished.
Heechul sighed once more. "Of course I didn't. You're an idiot." He turned on his heel and walked off to, presumably, find someone more worth his time to talk to.
"That was different," Eeteuk said after a moment.
Kangin snorted. "Yeah. What was that about?"
Hyukjae shrugged and popped the tab on the can. "He had extra change."
*
Hyukjae was sprawled out on the floor of one of the practice rooms, dripping sweat, and forcing oxygen into his lungs through sheer determination. "You aren't getting any better," he wheezed in a rare moment of candor brought on by complete and total exhaustion. "We've been at this for hours, non-stop -- why won't you stop? -- and I can't remember what it was like to sleep. I can't feel my left side. This is the end and you've killed me."
Heechul, who had fallen somewhere to Hyukjae's right, flopped his head to the side. "We've stopped; not moving is the same as stopping. Stop being so dramatic, it doesn't suit you. When did you start talking to me like that?"
"When I couldn't feel half of my body anymore," Hyukjae answered. "Sorry."
"Don't apologize," said Heechul.
"I wasn't thinking," Hyukjae continued. "Donghae sometimes talks to you that and. I don't know. Sorry."
"Donghae is allowed to talk to me however he wants. I like him," Heechul responded, shifting onto his side.
Hyukjae closed his eyes. "Everyone likes him."
"You've said that," sighed Heechul.
"Oh," said Hyukjae. "Sorry."
"Stop apologizing!" Heechul snapped, rolling back onto his back and further away from Hyukjae. "You lied to me before. I know how you feel about him."
Hyukjae bolted upright, despite his protesting muscles, and stared down at Heechul wide-eyed and ready to run. "I didn't! I don't. I mean," he faltered. "I didn't lie. And I don't anymore. I did but...not anymore." He shrugged one shoulder and looked anywhere but back at Heechul. "It was a while ago and I don't anymore. Not like that."
"He knew." Heechul sat up and faced Hyukjae, but still kept some distance. "He never said anything, but I think he knew. I knew, of course, but I know everything."
"Oh." Hyukjae wondered if then would be a good time for the Earth to open up and swallow him alive. It was the only decent thing to do.
"You talk about him a lot," said Heechul. "I wasn't sure if you still did."
Hyukjae blinked a few times and felt his face flush with embarrassment. "I didn't notice."
Heechul went quiet, face blank, then lay back down and shut his eyes. "Okay."
"What?" Hyukjae asked, unsure of what had just happened.
"You need to figure out how to be a better teacher," Heechul answered. "Or I'll have to find someone else who knows what they're doing with me."
*
"You've been acting strange lately," Donghae said, joining Hyukjae at the kitchen table where he had been trying to eat a full meal before someone else could come in and take half of it. It had happened several times before. Whenever he ate with anyone else in the group, somehow half of his plate would become theirs and sometimes more than half if he didn't guard it well enough. Someone had even found his hidden stacks of chocolates in case of a food emergency.
"It's true, you have been," added Sungmin, taking the chair on his other side. Hyukjae was slightly shocked to see Sungmin there and it must have shown on his face because Sungmin shrugged and stole a piece of his meat. "Donghae made a convincing argument so I've been helping him watch you."
"I know what I'm talking about," said Donghae around a mouthful of Hyukjae's rice. He leaned in close and Hyukjae could smell his shampoo. It was dark and heavy, unlike Heechul's which was flowery and lingered in his nose all throughout the next day after they'd spent time together. "Is Heechul making you do things you don't want to do? You don't really have to take orders from him; he just tells you that because he knows you will."
"Yeah, I know," Hyukjae responded. He pushed his plate away in defeat when he realized half of it had already been eaten in the previous few minutes where he'd been distracted. "He's not that bad."
Sungmin pressed the back of his hand to Hyukjae's forehead and peered at him worriedly. "You are acting suspicious. I thought Heechul scared you." He took hold of Hyukjae's wrist in his other hand and started checking his pulse, using the clock on the wall to time it.
"He never scared me!" protested Hyukjae, swatting off Sungmin's hands.
"Intimidated," Donghae corrected, grinning at him, smug. "It's all those late nights together, isn't it?"
"Who's spending late nights together?" Eeteuk asked, joining them in the kitchen and rummaging through the refrigerator. "Is this one of those things I should know, but really don't want to?" He pulled out a plastic jar and lifted the lid a little to get a better look at the contents. Immediately he closed the jar again and shoved it as far back into the refrigerator as it would go and moved on to the next container of something unidentifiable.
"Heechul and Hyukjae," said Sungmin, tilting his head up toward Eeteuk. "They've both been sneaking out a night and not getting back until late in the morning."
"Together!" Donghae clarified. "At first it was just Heechul, but then Hyukjae went to follow him and when he got back he told me that he couldn't find Heechul but ever since they've both been sneaking out. Together."
Eeteuk turned around to face them, holding something in a bag that looked like bread except the wrong color, a bowl of what might have been jello if jello was somehow both more liquid and much lumpier, and something that Hyukjae didn't think looked like any kind of food at all. "They have?" He looked at Hyukjae, eyebrow raised in intrigue. "You have?"
"It's nothing!" Hyukjae argued, standing up and pushing his chair back. "Nothing is going on and no one is acting suspicious!"
"I don't think you can judge your own suspiciousness," said Donghae. "There are rules against that. And even if there weren't, how can we trust a suspicious person to tell us whether they are or not being suspicious? Your answer would be questionable at best."
"He's right," agreed Sungmin.
"I'm staying out of it," Eeteuk said, shoving the food-like-products back to wherever they had come from. "But you have been acting odd recently." He sat down at the table and dragged Hyukjae's plate closer to his side and began to eat from it.
*
Hyukjae was confident in his directional skills enough to realize that after nearly an hour of driving, he and Heechul were definitely not even close to the company building, or even still in Seoul. His cheek was pressed to the cool window of Heechul's car as he watched the lights flash by in silence. Not even the radio was on and Heechul hadn't said a word since they'd gotten into the car and Hyukjae wasn't even sure how to start a conversation at that point.
He cleared his throat, opened his mouth to speak, then snapped his jaw shut again, teeth clicking together. He figured it was too late to have any input on where they were going anyway. Surreptitiously, he peeked out of the corner of his eyes to look at Heechul. He studied Heechul for a while as the passing lights from the street illuminated his profile.
"What?" Heechul asked, focused on the road in front of them and giving Hyukjae the impression that he really did know everything.
"Nothing," responded Hyukjae. He looked away.
Finally, Heechul pulled off of the highway and onto a smaller road in what looked to be the middle of nowhere. He stopped the car and got out. "Come on," he said, leaning down to look at Hyukjae through the open car door.
Hyukjae did as he was told and got out of the car quickly. He jogged a few steps to catch up with Heechul who had already begun to walk off in the direction of a small, hard to see pathway. "Where are we?" Hyukjae asked, glancing around nervously. "If you're planning to kill me, make sure Junsu gets my old socks."
"You're an idiot," Heechul reaffirmed. He took hold of Hyukjae's hand and tugged him forward to where the path opened up onto a small playground.
They walked over to the set of swings near the center and each took a seat. The moonlight lit the area well enough that Hyukjae could see Heechul clearly. He watched as Heechul pushed off from the ground, but didn't make any move to keep his momentum until he was eventually stopped again.
"Where are we?" Hyukjae repeated.
"It doesn't matter where we are," answered Heechul. He reached out and grabbed one of the chains holding up Hyukjae's swing and pulled him over to his side. "I decided that we needed a break. All work and no play makes you boring." He tilted his head to the side to regard Hyukjae, and the moonlight hit him perfectly causing his eyes to shine and his hair to sparkle and for a moment Hyukjae forgot who he was with. Then Heechul released his hold on the chain, resulting in Hyukjae swinging rapidly from side to side. "I don't like boring," said Heechul.
Hyukjae dug his heels into the ground to stop his movement, then slowly began to rock the swing back and forth. He turned to Heechul, smiling. "Thank you for bringing me out here. It's really nice."
Even in the darkness, Hyukjae could see Heechul rolling his eyes. "You don't have to make it sound like I never do anything nice. You really are so--" He sighed. "It's what friends do."
If possible, Hyukjae smiled wider. "Yeah." He twisted his swing around so that he could reach Heechul with his foot and push him just hard enough to spin him around.
"Hey!" Heechul yelled, indignant, and scrambled to retaliate.
*
"I think Donghae and Sungmin are right and there is something weird going on with you." Yehsung wrapped an arm around Hyukjae and rested his chin against his shoulder. He smiled for the cameras and winked to the fans outside who's screams had increased at his actions. "I saw you coming in this morning and you were covered in dirt."
Hyukjae waved to the fans as he shrugged Yehsung off of him. "I fell," he said.
"There was sand all over the floor in the hallway and in the bathroom," Yehsung said, taking his seat.
"I fell in a sandbox," Hyukjae amended. "A few times."
Yehsung blinked once, then nodded slowly, trying to absorb the information he had gotten. "A sandbox. You were in a sandbox. It's all so clear now."
"With Heechul," Eeteuk commented. He had been occasionally flipping through the pages going over the things they needed to cover that night and dancing around to the music that they were playing on their radio show and that filled the room. "He was complaining about sand in his shoes when I left. I thought it was a metaphor." Yehsung and Hyukjae turned to him and Eeteuk shrugged.
"We were just spending time together," Hyukjae insisted. "It's what friends do."
Judging from the way Yehsung's eyes widened almost comically, and the way Eeteuk stopped all movement and sat back down in his chair, arms folded and eyebrows raised, Hyukjae thought that maybe he hadn't said the right thing. "What I meant--"
"Friends?" Yehsung inquired, leaning his elbows on the desk and propping his chin up with his hands. "That's new."
"Hyukjae," Eeteuk started, appearing at a loss for words. "Friends? Heechul has a lot of friends, but since when have you been one of them? Not that you aren't a good friend and all, and I like you, you're very nice, but-- And not that I think anyone wouldn't be lucky to count you as a friend. It's just that. With Heechul. What I'm trying to say is." Eeteuk stopped talking.
"It's weird," said Yehsung. "I think he's trying to say that it's weird."
"I don't think--" Hyukjae was cut off again as on of the PDs signaled that they were going back on air and that maybe this time they should try to act somewhat professional or else she would take away all of their toys before they caused any real damage.
Eeteuk and Yehsung took their places for the show, while Hyukjae was left thinking about Heechul and how he could admit that it was maybe a little weird, but that he liked how things were going. Even if he wasn't entirely sure what was going on most of the time and he hadn't gotten a good night's sleep in weeks, but he couldn't seem to really care about that.
Eeteuk kicked him under the desk and Hyukjae remembered where he was and what he was supposed to be doing. He grinned at the fans and slipped easily into his dialogue with Yehsung.
*
"It's not that scary," Heechul said, folding his legs under him and adjusting the blanket so that most of it covered himself, but a little was spared for Hyukjae. "Stop closing your eyes and just watch it."
They'd turned the lights out in the room and were sitting together on the sofa watching a movie that Heechul had picked out and Hyukjae regretted having agreed to watch with him. It was dark and raining and they were all alone, pressed shoulder to shoulder, and watching the dead rise up and slaughter people in a small town that Hyukjae had never heard of before. Occasionally Heechul would shout at the screen when something particularly gruesome was about to happen and he was rooting for the rotting corpse with the axe because clearly the couple who had wandered into that abandoned building were too stupid to live anyway.
Hyukjae partially covered his eyes with his hands as the young, handsome, and rich captain of the soccer team wandered out into the dark and foggy woods to look for his girlfriend who had disappeared in act one. Eaten alive, Hyukjae recalled. He had missed a lot of the plot due to the amount of times he had looked away or covered his ears and shut his eyes, but he had been certain that the young, handsome, and rich soccer captain had been the main character and therefore exempt from a bloody death. As the character on the screen had his throat ripped out by his former science teacher turned mindless zombie, Hyukjae figured he had called that one wrong.
"Oh my God," Hyukjae croaked as the camera zoomed in on the school bully being disemboweled by what remained of the chess team. "Oh my God."
"It's not that bad," Heechul admonished. Blood splattered against the camera lens and the cheerleader with a heart of gold ran through the street, slid on the entrails of the crotchety old town mechanic, and was caught at the last second by the strangely attractive class nerd. "The blood and decapitations aren't that bad," he corrected. "The plot is a little bad."
Hyukjae grabbed what little corner of the blanket that had been bestowed on him and tried to cover his head. "Tell me when people stop getting killed and eaten."
"You're such a little girl," Heechul said, reaching over and yanking the blanket down. "Watch the movie." He neatly tucked the blanket back around Hyukjae's lap, then turned his attention back to the screen just as the the class nerd and the cheerleader with a heart of gold started to run through a cemetery. The decapitated head of the town's former mayor dropped from a tree, causing Hyukjae to shriek and then try to cover his outburst with a cough and desperate hand waving.
"I can't believe that scared you," said Heechul incredulously.
"I'm not scared!" Hyukjae insisted, though his argument was somewhat weak since he had recovered his eyes with his hands. "I'm just... the light hurts my eyes." He could practically feel Heechul laughing at him, not to mention the popcorn that had been thrown at his head.
"It's not that scary," Heechul repeated, flicking another kernel of popcorn at him. "You do know that zombies aren't real, right?"
"Of course I know that." Hyukjae dropped his hands into his lap. He kept his focus on Heechul so he could at least put up a brave front even though he still wanted to hide under the blankets until someone turned the lights back on.
"Good," said Heechul. "Then watch the movie like a grownup."
Hyukjae forced himself to look back at the movie, just in time to see the cheerleader with a heart of gold get her limbs torn off in a dark shed where blood was dripping from the ceiling.
*
Consciousness returned to Hyukjae slowly. Sounds were slightly muted and his arms and legs felt numb and warm and he could have easily fallen back asleep, except that the voices in the room became more and more distinct and he found himself waking up just a little more as he couldn't stop listening to whoever was talking. He also realized that the reason his right arm felt numb was because it was completely asleep.
"Should we wake them up?" someone asked, voice somewhat low as if they were trying to be quiet, but not doing a very good job of it. "They look comfortable." It sounded like Shindong.
"I need to find my camera first," came a second voice, snickering. Hyukjae vaguely recognized it as belonging to Kyuhyun.
"That's a good idea," said Donghae, instantly recognizable, even when Hyukjae was having a hard time remembering his own name.
"No," another voice whispered vehemently. "No cameras, no-- is that water? No throwing water on anyone. All of you leave." Definitely Eeteuk.
Hyukjae began to drift off again as he listened to the sound of shuffled footsteps retreating out of the room.
"Hey," said Eeteuk, prodding him in the shoulder with his bony fingers. "Wake up."
"Go away," mumbled Heechul. He shifted a little, jostling Hyukjae due to their probable close proximity to each other.
Hyukjae could feel Heechul's fingers pressed lightly to his hip and he cracked an eye open to see just where they were. "Oh," he said, hurrying to sit up and nearly colliding with Eeteuk who had been bent over them. "Sorry. I. Sorry." Sometime during the night Hyukjae had fallen asleep and had ended up nearly completely sprawled on top of Heechul. "I think I drooled on your shirt."
Heechul glanced down at his chest, tugging at his shirt to get a better look at it. He rubbed at his eyes a few times, stretched, and sat up slowly. "I was going to push you onto to the ground when you fell asleep on me, but you're really heavy." He stood up, wrapped the blanket around himself, and started off toward the bathroom. "You owe me a new shirt," he called back.
Eeteuk took Heechul's place next to Hyukjae on the sofa. "Do I want to know what is going on?"
"If you find out, tell me," said Hyukjae.
*
"Shouldn't we be working on your dance technique? Improving your skills? Mastering the basics of male-oriented routines?" Hyukjae questioned, watching Heechul shuffle the deck of cards with an experienced hand.
"What?" Heechul paused momentarily, then resumed his way of shuffling the cards that was usually reserved for pros and people who were going to take your money one way or another. "Oh, right. Maybe next time. Tonight we play cards."
"But," Hyukjae leaned back against the cool mirrored wall of the practice room, "why did we have to come all the way over here?" He pulled his knees to his chest and yawned. "If we stopped sneaking out then everyone, and especially Donghae, would stop saying I've been acting suspicious. They all know they we've been leaving together."
"That's because you're not very good at hiding things," Heechul cut in.
"I can hide things! It's only that this time...I couldn't," Hyukjae floundered. "And if we aren't here to practice, then why can't we just stay back with everyone else or invite them along."
Heechul dropped the deck of cards he had been holding and they scattered over the floor. "Because," Heechul said. "It's not about dancing and it never was. I like my time alone whenever I can get it, but then you-- you are such an idiot. I knew how you felt about Donghae and I knew how he felt about you, but then--"
Faster than Hyukjae could comprehend, he was being pushed to the ground with Heechul above him and Heechul's lips against his own in a kiss. Heechul's hands were pressed to his, their fingers laced together. Someone's heartbeat thudded against their ribcage, but Hyukjae couldn't tell who it was. He guessed it was probably his own.
Then it was over and Heechul pulled away and sat back on his heels. Hyukjae took a few shallow breaths, unable to think, then took in a deep shuddering gulp of air. He lifted himself up onto his elbows and tried to speak. "I--"
"We should go," said Heechul, standing up. "I should go. Clean up, will you?" He didn't wait for an answer before he was out of the door, leaving Hyukjae alone.
*
Donghae approached Hyukjae in the hallway outside of a show they were recording together, that was currently taking a break for a set change. He slung his arm around Hyukjae's neck. "Did something happen the other night? You've been acting off for days. Like your world has spun off its axis and about to go crashing into the sun."
Hyukjae poked Donghae in the ribs. "I'm fine," he said, smiling. "Since when have you paid so much attention to me? Don't you have anything better to do?"
Donghae shrugged. "Since always, and no. This recording and bothering you have filled my entire schedule for the rest of the day, and some of tomorrow as well. You should feel lucky to have my undivided attention. Not many get such an honor."
"Yeah," said Hyukjae. "Really lucky. Thank you for showing me the light. My world was darkness until you came along and filled it with your nagging and light." His phone buzzed in his pocket as he spoke, disrupting the flow of his dramatic statement.
"That's been happening all day! Who keeps messaging you?" asked Donghae, removing his arm from around Hyukjae and standing back.
"I don't know," Hyukjae replied, trying to sound uninterested, though he feared that Donghae would hear the tense tone of his voice. "It's probably nothing important." He tried to brush off Donghae's curiosity.
"You don't know that," said Donghae, reaching into Hyukjae's pocket before Hyukjae could get away or even change the subject. He brandished the phone with a flourish. "You should check."
Nervously, Hyukjae flipped open his phone and looked at the text messages he'd been getting for the past hour. All of them were from Heechul and none of them were anything he wanted to read. He scanned them anyway.
We need to talk. --Heechul
11:09am
I have to explain some things and I just want you to listen. --Heechul
11:15am
Meet me in my room tonight. --Heechul
11:23am
I don't know your schedule, but I'll wait up. --H
11:30am
You have to be here. --H
11:41am
I just want to talk.
12:03pm
"So," Donghae tried to catch a glimpse of what was written. "Anything important? Life or death? About to careen into some kind of inferno, such as the sun? You do look a little wobbly." He put a comforting hand on Hyukjae's shoulder and stared at him with sincere concern showing on his face. "If something happened, you can tell me. You know that, right?"
"No...it's nothing," replied Hyukjae, pocketing his phone once again. He steadied himself mentally and tried not to think about Heechul because he didn't know what to think about Heechul. He was confused and somehow every thought he'd had lately had lead him back to thoughts of Heechul and even more confusion. "I'm just tired and I forgot some of the script for later."
"Okay," Donghae accepted that answer, though it was a few moments before he nodded and grinned. "Okay." He started marching off down the hallway a few paces, then turned around and walked backward. "Hey, let's go somewhere tonight. You've been neglecting me lately. I've just decided that and I am very hurt. You will buy me food and there will be merriment. Perhaps there will also be fun and games. Likely a close encounter with some fans, seeing as they are everywhere. Are you up for it?"
Hyukjae laughed and fell into stride next to Donghae as they began to walk back toward the recording studio together. "Sure, except for the part where you think I will be paying for food."
*
A night out with Donghae was exactly what Hyukjae had needed to take his mind off of all the things he didn't understand lately. Especially since the moment they stepped out of the car and into the mall that was rather unfortunately crowded with teenagers for a school night, they were spotted by fans and he didn't have time to think of anything besides escape. The group of young girls never approached them, however they followed close behind and snapped pictures every few seconds. Every few minutes one of them would yell out a marriage proposal and the others would giggle.
"You said we wouldn't need disguises," Hyukjae whispered heatedly, pulling his hat lower in a futile attempt to make him look like someone else. "You said there wouldn't be a lot of people here!"
Donghae tugged his own cap a little lower. "And you listened to me. After all these years, I can't believe you haven't learned anything." He grasped Hyukjae's arm at the elbow and started walking briskly toward the other end of the building. The girls behind them matched their pace.
They started to walk faster and faster until they were in a full out run and Hyukjae wished he had worn better shoes.
"This way," Donghae made a sharp turn around a corner, dragging Hyukjae with him. They ducked into the aquarium on their right. "Two, please," said Donghae, handing over some money and grabbing the tickets before the woman at the counter even figured out what had just happened. He pulled Hyukjae inside where it was dark and nearly empty and would be a little harder to follow them.
"That was fun." Donghae let go of Hyukjae's arm and turned to him with a wide grin. "We should do this more often. Make it a weekly thing."
Hyukjae opened and closed his mouth, failing to find the right words. "No," he settled on.
"Fine," said Donghae, still grinning and looking far too amused. "I want to get pictures with the fish." He wandered off further into the aquarium leaving Hyukjae to trail behind him.
*
After nearly an hour, they'd only made it to around the halfway point because every few feet Donghae would pause in front of a fish tank to pose and take pictures of himself. Occasionally he would drag Hyukjae into the shot and more often than not, they'd both end up trying to imitate the fish for the photo. It was a long process in which Donghae would smush Hyukjae's cheeks together, tell him he wasn't doing it right, but end up taking the picture anyway and then laughing at how silly they both looked.
"I've figured out what's going on with you and Heechul," Donghae said, pressing his forehead to the glass that separated them from a cage of bats to try to get a better look. "I've known you both for a long time, so it was easy when I thought about it."
"I don't understand," said Hyukjae, shifting from foot to foot.
Donghae turned back around to face him and cocked his head to the side curiously. "You don't?"
Hyukjae shook his head No. "What did you figure out?"
Donghae smiled fondly and linked his arm with Hyukjae's and bumped their shoulders together. "You're a little slow sometimes," he said. He glanced around them for a moment, then drew Hyukjae over to a darker corner where even if someone did walk into the room, they wouldn't be able to see the two of them.
Donghae sighed softly, looked around one more time, leaned in and kissed Hyukjae on the lips. Hyukjae's eyes widened and he pulled back abruptly. "I--"
"You're one of my best friends," said Donghae. "I love you, but. It wouldn't have worked. I want you to be my best friend until we're old and our hair is grey and all of this is just a memory that we talk about all of the time to anyone who will listen. I want you to be my best friend forever."
Hyukjae reach down to hold Donghae's hands and rested his head on Donghae's shoulder. "Yeah, I get that now. I want that, too."
"Good," Donghae said. "I'm still not going to tell you what I figured out, though."
Hyukjae shoved him playfully. "I've changed my mind. I want a new best friend," he called back, marching further into the aquarium.
Donghae skipped after him, laughing, and threw his arms around Hyukjae's neck from behind. "Too late; you're stuck with me. Who else is going to keep you sane?"
Hyukjae struggled against Donghae's hold, unable to get him to let go. "I don't think that's the right word for what you do," he noted.
*
They went their separate ways when they got back to the apartment building. Hyukjae went up to his apartment, while Donghae hung around the lobby talking to Kibum who had been on his way out, back to where he lived. Inside, Sungmin and Kyuhyun were engaged in a video game battle. Ryeowook stood over them and was trying to coerce them both into going to sleep because they were loud and he wanted to sleep and if they didn't agree to at least be quiet then he'd take the game system and drop it from the roof.
Sungmin and Kyuhyun both gave half-hearted, distracted mutters of agreement, which was apparently enough for Ryeowook who trudged out of the room yawning. He gave a small wave at Hyukjae when he passed by.
Hyukjae walked over to Sungmin and Kyuhyun and sat down next to them on the floor. "How long have you been playing?" he asked.
"A few hours. Kibum was here for a while, but he had to leave," Sungmin replied, not taking his eyes away from the screen.
"He was just mad that I beat his high score," said Kyuhyun.
"They're both mad that I wiped the floor with them," Sungmin added cheerfully. He hit a few buttons and one of the players in the game flew through the air after being punched by the other guy.
Kyuhyun jabbed at the buttons on the controller to counterattack. "Beginners luck," he grumbled.
Hyukjae was about to say something to that when his phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out without thinking and checked the message.
Are you coming?
1:52am
He hit the power button and shoved the phone back into his pocket. "I'm going to sleep," he said, straightening up.
*
Hyukjae yawned, rubbed at his eyes with his palms, and mentally tried to slow time so he could stay in bed and sleep longer. Maybe if he had another few hours, he thought, he could actually even fall asleep. Instead his alarm went off, piercing the quiet of his bedroom with its loud beeps.
He rolled over, nearly falling out of bed, too tired to properly move his legs, and trudged into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He'd only just gotten the toothbrush in his mouth when the door, not even fully closed, slammed open and ricochet off the adjoining wall.
"If you weren't going to show up, the least you could have done was tell me!" Heechul yelled, gripping the door-frame. "I waited for you for hours and this morning I find out they you were out with Donghae all night." He seemed to deflate at that. "You should have told me." Gently, Heechul shut the door and leaned back against it.
"I--" Hyukjae paused and spit out the mouthful of toothpaste into the sink and set down his toothbrush. "I didn't think." The stood their in silence for a while. Hyukjae shifted to rest his hip against the sink and tried to refrain from fidgeting anymore than that, though it was difficult. He was nervous and didn't know what to say and he wished Heechul was still yelling at him instead of staring down at the floor. Hyukjae didn't know how to deal with Heechul in that kind of situation. Though, if he were perfectly honest with himself, he clearly didn't know how to deal with Heechul at all.
"I'm not Donghae," Heechul said, looking up from the floor and straight at Hyukjae. "I'm not like him at all."
Hyukjae nodded his head, not sure if there was something he should be saying. "I know that."
"Nothing was supposed to happen," Heechul continued as if Hyukjae hadn't even spoken. "I was going to stop feeling anything for you, because I didn't want to, because you have a funny smile and you're so stupid, because... But then you showed up that night and you stuck around and I thought. Sometimes you would look at me the way I wanted you to, and I thought..."
Heechul turned his back to Hyukjae. "I liked spending time with you, without you being afraid of me," he said, opening the door. "That's what I was going to say last night."
Hyukjae stood still as he listened to Heechul's retreating footsteps. His breath was caught in his throat and he was fighting the desire to run after Heechul or to crumple to the ground. After a few more seconds, he heard the front door open and shut and then he began to move. He walked out into the hallway and in the direction of Sungmin's room. He opened the door quietly and slipped inside, noting that the other bed in the room was empty.
Carefully, he crawled into Sungmin's bed and pressed himself against Sungmin with little thought about waking him up. "I heard yelling. Was that Heechul?" Sungmin asked, cracking one eye open. "Hey, what's wrong?" He wiped at Hyukjae's eyes and wrapped an arm around his waist. "What happened? Hyukjae, are you crying?"
Hyukjae buried his head against Sungmin's neck. "I don't know," he said.
*
"You're an idiot," Donghae said, sitting down next to Hyukjae in the gated parking lot of the building where they were recording for a talk show. Eeteuk and Kangin were still inside of the building somewhere, probably trying to sort out why they were running so far behind schedule. It was only the four of them that day, and Hyukjae was glad about it. Even more so when he found he had time to wander off alone instead of having to deal with questions and cameras. Though it would have been nice to know the right answer to something for once.
"I'm starting to agree with that," Hyukjae said, ducking his head down and staring raptly at his shoes. He had hoped that he'd managed to get out of the building without Donghae seeing where he was going because he knew that Donghae would want to talk.
"Whatever happened with Heechul--"
"He kissed me," Hyukjae interrupted, blushing, and trying to hide his face from Donghae even more.
"Oh," said Donghae. "Yeah, I guessed it was something like that. Well, maybe not that, exactly, but I know he cares about you a lot. That's what I figured out the other day. He's been acting as if nothing is wrong these last few days, but I know him and I know you. And I know that you're both being stupid." He tilted to the side so they were shoulder to shoulder. "You need to fix this."
Hyukjae sighed. "I don't know how. He wanted to talk before, but I was afraid to face him and now we aren't talking at all. I want to make things right, but I'm afraid I'm just going to make things worse. I don't know what to do."
"That's because you're an idiot," Donghae pointed out. "First you should try figuring out how you feel about Heechul and go from there. I know that you care about him, so just expand on that. Even if you don't feel the same way he does, he still deserves to hear it from you." He reached over and took hold of Hyukjae's hand. "The worst thing that could happen already has."
"You're right," said Hyukjae. He held onto Donghae's hand and stared at their fingers laced together. "When did you get so wise?"
"I've always been this way," Donghae sniffed. "It's just taken you this long to notice."
*
Hyukjae sat on the edge of his bed, stood up, walked forward a few feet, turned around and sat back down. He stood back up and repeated his actions. "Do I like Heechul?" He asked the empty room. "Maybe. No. Maybe." He flopped backward onto his bed and pulled his pillow over his face. "Yes," he said, voiced muffled.
He sat up, hugging the pillow to his chest. "Maybe." Hyukjae was aware that if anyone else was in the room they'd likely be telling him to stop acting like a little girl, prompting him to check the door just to make sure that he had locked it. Secure in the knowledge that he wouldn't be walked in on while talking to himself, he spun on his heel and paced the room back and forth. After a minute or two of that he collapsed back onto the bed with a heavy sigh.
"Yes," he announced. "Maybe."
Without thinking, Hyukjae unlocked his door and marched out of his bedroom and out of the apartment. It was when he was riding the elevator up to the next floor that he remembered he was wearing pajamas that didn't even look like his own, and barefoot. "This is a bad idea," he said, right as the doors slid open and he saw that Heechul was standing on the other side. "Oh, hi," he managed to say after a moment of surprise.
"Are you getting out?" Heechul asked. "I have somewhere to--"
"No, wait," Hyukjae cut in. "I...Can we talk?"
Heechul's mouth was pressed in a thin line and Hyukjae was afraid that he'd refuse him. "Okay," he said finally. He turned around and headed back inside the apartment. Nervously, Hyukjae followed a few steps behind him.
"Talk," Heechul said, shutting his bedroom door.
Hyukjae stood in the middle of the room, terrified of what was going to come out of his mouth. He wished he had thought about it more, or prepared some kind of speech, or even asked Donghae for more guidance and wisdom. "The other day, I shouldn't have avoided you. I'm sorry," he said, deciding that was the best way to start.
"Is that all?" Heechul put his hand on the doorknob.
"No," Hyukjae rushed over to keep Heechul from leaving. He pressed his hand to Heechul's over the doorknob. "No, I...I don't understand you," he said, dropping his hand. "You intimidate me sometimes, but I like being around you. And I like the idea of you liking me and Donghae told me that I need to fix this, but I don't know how and I'm afraid that I can't because I'm probably going to say the wrong thing. I like you, though." Hyukjae snapped his mouth closed, unsure where all of that had come from.
"Alright," Heechul said, not moving.
"I guess I'll just go now." Hyukjae started toward the door, but in a flash Heechul had him pinned against the wall.
"That took you a long time to figure out," he said, lips just above Hyukjae's. "I was beginning to think you never would. Don't do that again."
Hyukjae nodded vigorously, eyes wide. "Yeah."
Heechul smiled, bright and genuine. "Good." He kissed Hyukjae, soft and warm and completely different from the one before. "Are those your clothes?" Heechul asked, pulling back to kiss up Hyukjae's jaw then down his neck.
"I think they're Sungmin's," he answered distractedly, tilting his head back. His sharp intake of air was involuntary as he felt Heechul press his knee between his legs.
"Take them off," Heechul said, trailing his fingers up under Hyukjae's shirt and tracing his ribcage.
"What?" Hyukjae would have jumped back if there had been any room behind him. Instead he blinked at Heechul, startled. "You-- what?."
Heechul rolled his eyes, and stepped away from Hyukjae just far enough to have room to pull his own shirt over his head. "Now you," he said. He rubbed his hands lightly over Hyukjae's hips, but made no other moves.
Hyukjae could feel himself blushing from head to toe as he pulled the drawstring on his pants, loosening them enough to fall to the floor. His shirt came off next as he tossed it off to the side and tried to look anywhere but at Heechul, completely aware that he was standing in his underwear and all he wanted was for Heechul to touch him.
He felt himself being tugged closer to Heechul, and then they were kissing again, except this time it was more heated. Heechul bit lightly against Hyukjae's lips and ran his fingernails down his back. Hyukjae ran his hands over the flat planes of Heechul's stomach, before slowly unbuttoning his jeans without his hands shaking.
Heechul smirked against his mouth and lead him backward until Hyukjae's felt the back of his legs hit Heechul's bed. He fell back against it and Heechul crawled on top of him, kissing his lips, neck, and taking one of Hyukjae's hands in his own. With his other hand, he reached down and pressed gently against Hyukjae's erection. Hyukjae shuddered, a soft moan escaping him.
He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on breathing as he felt Heechul pull his underwear, exposing him completely. Then Heechul's warmth was gone. Hyukjae opened his eyes, trying to focus, only to see Heechul's mouth hovering over his cock and dart his tongue out to lick at the slit. He squeezed at Heechul's hand that was still locked to his. He dropped his head back down to the mattress, too overwhelmed with the feeling of Heechul sucking leisurely on the head of his cock.
Something warm and slick was wiped against his inner thigh, but before Hyukjae had any time to think about it he cried out sharp and shocked as Heechul slid a finger into him. "Oh, God," Hyukjae breathed out.
Heechul shifted slightly and kissed Hyukjae's hip. "No, but I like that." He moved his finger in and out slowly, then added another and another until Hyukjae is canting his hips against Heechul's hand.
"Please," he said, voice cracking.
Heechul pressed another kiss to his hip before sliding his fingers out. He positioned himself above Hyukjae, pressing Hyukjae's knee up as Hyukjae wrapped his other leg around Heechul's waist. "Please," Hyukjae he repeated, tightening his hold on Heechul's hand and running his fingers through the soft hairs at the back of his neck.
Heechul entered him slowly, causing Hyukjae to whine faintly in the back of his throat. He wriggled his hips, attempting to pull Heechul in further. The slow pace didn't last long. Heechul began to fuck him, hard, and bite against his collarbone, meaning to mark. Hyukjae pumped his own cock in time to Heechul's thrusts until he came, spilling into his own hand and crying out. It didn't take long for Heechul to follow him over the edge, rolling his hips a few last times to ride out his orgasm.
"I don't think I can move," said Hyukjae, having finally caught his breath and idly running his fingers along Heechul's spine as Heechul continued to bite and suck against neck.
"Good," Heechul said.
*
Hyukjae woke up surrounded by warmth and with a pleasant sort of fog in his brain.
"You snore," Heechul mumbled, mouth pressed against the back of his neck.
Hyukjae flailed his limbs wildly, momentarily confused and disoriented. He landed on the floor tangled in Heechul's blankets. Heechul looked down at him, over the side of the bed. "Good morning," he said.
"Hi," replied Hyukjae, brain finally catching up with him.
Heechul reached a hand out to him. "Coming back up here?"
Hyukjae took hold of Heechul's hand and pulled himself back up and into the bed, dragging the blankets with him. "Yeah," he said, wrapping a leg around Heechul. He tucked his head under Heechul's chin and closed his eyes. "Good morning."