of others and idols

[punx_grrl]

I love to hear stories from friends who tell me all they are doing for the Kingdom. They are feeding the homeless, witnessing on the streets, going on missions trips, speaking in their churches, walking so closely to the Lord that they can hear His heart's desire for them pounding through His chest. It is so encouraging. I hear all these things and i want to be a part of it. I want to be closer to the Lord so that i can work more for "His Kingdom come". i desire more of what He wants from me. But i've realized that to be able to properly do these desires of my heart that are outwardly shown through actions, i need to first be right in my heart. I need to desire more of the Lord in our relationship together. i need to have a full heart for Him. Not a heart that desires others and idols. i know that i truely do want the Lord more in my life. But i know that i sometimes try to fill the desire i have for knowing more of God and growing closer in my relationship with Him with actions and deeds. Without deeds, faith is dead; but without faith deeds are like dirty rags. They go hand in hand. I can't substitute one for another. i need to pursue more of Jesus in my life, so my actions for His Kingdom are just that. Without the Lord i am nothing. I need to understand that my works are meaningless without God and without His Spirit in me.

For above all else, the Christian life is a love affair of the heart.
-Eldredge, J. The Sacred Romance pp. 8