(no subject)
sometimes i have a lapse in judgment and miss winter
usually its fall i miss but sometimes winter
i just saw a picture from winter and kyles tiny studio apartment that for some reason i really miss right now
because it was the closest thing, i think, to adulthood.
i swore up and down that i didnt like it, but im really thinking fondly of it right now. it was a tiny little sad place, really, and quite tacky. but it began to feel a bit like home. because it was kyle's home and that made me need to love it. because i stayed there a lot, had my own sleeping spot that wasnt comfortable but i got used to it, and cleaned a lot. there was never a better picture than when kyle was mopping the bathroom floor while standing in the bathtub in his shorts
we're gonna have so much fun in our own home.
this year he's living with six other guys
and that might not feel so much like home
but winter will be here somewhat soon
then i have to battle the weather the weekends i want to visit
or he wants to visit then he drives it
then i sit around and worry a lot lot lot because the way i see it, if i died in a car accident i would like that too much, but if kyle died my life would be miserable for a long while, probly wouldnt marry. id be in trouble.
i dont base my life on him, tho, just my plans. i need him alive.
but winter
one winter, britani my best friend til death, and i, laid on her bed, staring out the new falling snow, and listened to adore by the smashing pumpkins. we didnt even really need to talk. and thats the best winter album ever. and i can only listen to it in the winter. and i miss it, cuz its kindve like machina is like that too
fall will be exciting tho because i love the colors.
its no secret anymore. my place of work is moving. to a building across the street and down the block a bit with a huge window in front and space for couches and club chairs (which the boss has already purchased), a stage for shows, a new espresso machine, a party room, more workspace, wireless internet, a separate kitchen THAT CLOSES AT THREE, and all of the things that i have always wanted it to be. this will be an amazing way for me to finish out my years of work there and im glad its happening while kyle's gone at school cuz ill have something more to focus on.
and when kyle and i have our shop, itll be called motley brew (tm) and we'll sing "grounds, grounds, grounds" to the tune of "girls girls girls" by motley crue and we'll work together and i just wrapped josh and sarah's gift and ive told myself im not whining at kyle anymore about marriage cuz he doesnt forget
and oh ya, im quitting smoking so im going to be consuming much more caffeine in the coming days and im leaving a week from saturday for idaho.
usually its fall i miss but sometimes winter
i just saw a picture from winter and kyles tiny studio apartment that for some reason i really miss right now
because it was the closest thing, i think, to adulthood.
i swore up and down that i didnt like it, but im really thinking fondly of it right now. it was a tiny little sad place, really, and quite tacky. but it began to feel a bit like home. because it was kyle's home and that made me need to love it. because i stayed there a lot, had my own sleeping spot that wasnt comfortable but i got used to it, and cleaned a lot. there was never a better picture than when kyle was mopping the bathroom floor while standing in the bathtub in his shorts
we're gonna have so much fun in our own home.
this year he's living with six other guys
and that might not feel so much like home
but winter will be here somewhat soon
then i have to battle the weather the weekends i want to visit
or he wants to visit then he drives it
then i sit around and worry a lot lot lot because the way i see it, if i died in a car accident i would like that too much, but if kyle died my life would be miserable for a long while, probly wouldnt marry. id be in trouble.
i dont base my life on him, tho, just my plans. i need him alive.
but winter
one winter, britani my best friend til death, and i, laid on her bed, staring out the new falling snow, and listened to adore by the smashing pumpkins. we didnt even really need to talk. and thats the best winter album ever. and i can only listen to it in the winter. and i miss it, cuz its kindve like machina is like that too
fall will be exciting tho because i love the colors.
its no secret anymore. my place of work is moving. to a building across the street and down the block a bit with a huge window in front and space for couches and club chairs (which the boss has already purchased), a stage for shows, a new espresso machine, a party room, more workspace, wireless internet, a separate kitchen THAT CLOSES AT THREE, and all of the things that i have always wanted it to be. this will be an amazing way for me to finish out my years of work there and im glad its happening while kyle's gone at school cuz ill have something more to focus on.
and when kyle and i have our shop, itll be called motley brew (tm) and we'll sing "grounds, grounds, grounds" to the tune of "girls girls girls" by motley crue and we'll work together and i just wrapped josh and sarah's gift and ive told myself im not whining at kyle anymore about marriage cuz he doesnt forget
and oh ya, im quitting smoking so im going to be consuming much more caffeine in the coming days and im leaving a week from saturday for idaho.