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oh, dear livejournal, the backburner dweller, how i usually dont miss thee.
ive been finding lately how much i need to leave this area. ive been getting really stressed lately, mostly at work, although i love my job. i really do, but im completely burnt out. i wake up in the morning knowing i have to go in to clean and i can barely drag myself out. knowing i have to go into eco isnt so bad, but it still just makes dragging myself around so hard.
this weekend couldve been worse, though. britani somehow connived kyle into going out with us by offering to buy him booze (which she did not, which is hilarious) and i think we all had a good time. kyle and i talked about our future house a lot. i love thinking about that, and i didnt realize he did, too. that makes me really happy.
sometimes i dont think many people understand our relationship. which doesnt matter, i guess, it just makes it hard because they think im just choosing him over them. which im not doing intentionally. our relationship is multi-faceted, whether or not people realize that. and it takes a lot of work. long distance sucks. fortunately we only have one more 2-week span to go, and maybe not, even, if its a saturday i have off. it seemed like only a couple of months ago he moved down there and i was looking down the barrel of a 200 mile gun. i was scared to death and didnt even know if we'd make it. and now he's got under a month to go, speckled with "me-weekends." the leaves are budding on the trees (in greenville at least, here theyre still barren) and its giving new life to the atmosphere and the future that im not as nervous about as i was.
im moving. in less than four months, depending upon when idaho happens. i was really scared of the concept, and i talked to kyle about it, and he helped me realize its not something to be nervous about, but something i have to do. especially now that he cant get off-campus housing. its a bummer, but itll be easy to get through, especially since ill be a 20 minute drive away (much like home), and bobby will be off-campus. screw you, bobby! im so happy, really, that kyle has a friend that i like so much. considering. i think next year will definitely be an adventure for me (and my kittie!). itll be really new. im so excited to see what my space will be like and what job ill have. id like to think about bartending, but i dont know. i hate the idea of working til 1 or 2 in the morning.
i need this change. and i guess this will be a sort of proverbial step down the aisle for me (teehee)(is it REALLY all i think about?)(who knows!), or at least a step toward. i just feel like every time kyle and i have a weekend together, we grow closer. its like being on a fast train, sometimes. like i feel like i could never be closer to my destination, then in a blink of an eye, we're bound even tighter. i love us. a lot lot lot (robot chicken love).
i think i need to finish my chocolate easter bunny.
we're going to have a studio in a second bedroom for my paints and his drums and we'll be in there together and it will be <333.
ive been finding lately how much i need to leave this area. ive been getting really stressed lately, mostly at work, although i love my job. i really do, but im completely burnt out. i wake up in the morning knowing i have to go in to clean and i can barely drag myself out. knowing i have to go into eco isnt so bad, but it still just makes dragging myself around so hard.
this weekend couldve been worse, though. britani somehow connived kyle into going out with us by offering to buy him booze (which she did not, which is hilarious) and i think we all had a good time. kyle and i talked about our future house a lot. i love thinking about that, and i didnt realize he did, too. that makes me really happy.
sometimes i dont think many people understand our relationship. which doesnt matter, i guess, it just makes it hard because they think im just choosing him over them. which im not doing intentionally. our relationship is multi-faceted, whether or not people realize that. and it takes a lot of work. long distance sucks. fortunately we only have one more 2-week span to go, and maybe not, even, if its a saturday i have off. it seemed like only a couple of months ago he moved down there and i was looking down the barrel of a 200 mile gun. i was scared to death and didnt even know if we'd make it. and now he's got under a month to go, speckled with "me-weekends." the leaves are budding on the trees (in greenville at least, here theyre still barren) and its giving new life to the atmosphere and the future that im not as nervous about as i was.
im moving. in less than four months, depending upon when idaho happens. i was really scared of the concept, and i talked to kyle about it, and he helped me realize its not something to be nervous about, but something i have to do. especially now that he cant get off-campus housing. its a bummer, but itll be easy to get through, especially since ill be a 20 minute drive away (much like home), and bobby will be off-campus. screw you, bobby! im so happy, really, that kyle has a friend that i like so much. considering. i think next year will definitely be an adventure for me (and my kittie!). itll be really new. im so excited to see what my space will be like and what job ill have. id like to think about bartending, but i dont know. i hate the idea of working til 1 or 2 in the morning.
i need this change. and i guess this will be a sort of proverbial step down the aisle for me (teehee)(is it REALLY all i think about?)(who knows!), or at least a step toward. i just feel like every time kyle and i have a weekend together, we grow closer. its like being on a fast train, sometimes. like i feel like i could never be closer to my destination, then in a blink of an eye, we're bound even tighter. i love us. a lot lot lot (robot chicken love).
i think i need to finish my chocolate easter bunny.
we're going to have a studio in a second bedroom for my paints and his drums and we'll be in there together and it will be <333.