*gasp* it's an update
as we all know i haven't updated in a while but that's ok. i'm doing it now. i'm sorry for my lack of enthusiam to update i've just become really bad at it. i'll come on here with the full intention of updating and then i'm like ehhh it's too much effort. i've been kinda blah lately. here's the scoop:
i've been working a lot but not 1/2 as much as i'd like to be. my "boss" erin is a fucking whore douche bag who is like on a mega power trip and she needs to learn her fucking place. so here's whats up with that. i used to work every sunday right... that wasn't a big deal although it could be a pain in my side sometimes it was nice because there isn't a whole lot to do on sundays anyways. well that came to a screeching friggin halt because erin now has elizabeth working in the department on sunday nites so i no longer have my sunday. which cut back my hours. :-/ ok that's not the worst part. because we are on holiday hours now we're open later which means in return the store is getting more hours. well not so for me. erin decided that i only need to work 5-10 or 6-10. what the fuck? seriously... it's not worth it for me to drive to work for only four hours. i'm sitting her ass down tomorrow when i go in and i'm telling her what's up. i want more hours and i want them in my department. this week i have the "joyous" (hint the sarcasm) pleasure of working in functional housewares (toasters/storage/crap/etc) tuesday and then working in bedding (the hole of the store which i fucking hate) on thursday morning. that's right in the am. now i am not a morning person in the slightest and that will come to a stop as well. i hate working mornings and they all know that but with her it's a common thing where she will schedule me to close at nite and then open the next morning. i dont have the privlege of living close to work. i drive anywhere from 20mins to 1/2 hour for work everyday and then that same length of time home. so i have a bitch drive. i also drive the furthest to and from work besides the general manager kevin. so i hate closing and then opening because when i close i do not get home until around 11ish and then i change into my jammies and talk on the phone for a bit and because i'm so used to not going to bed until 1-2 am i dont fall asleep until then or even afterward. and then i'm up and about at 7am so i can be at work for 9. it's complete shit. so i'm giving her a talking to and if i don't get better hours then they can fuck themselves at lnt and i'll go work elsewhere. it isn't fair to me that one week i'll have a full schedule of 37.5 hours and then the next week i'm cut down to 15. that's complete bullshit. i have bills just like everyone else in that store and i'm getting sick of being pushed around. this should be a fun talk seeing as in erin is a fucking bimbo dumbass who can't grasp the simple concept of time. *rolls eyes* wish me luck on that.
things at home haven't been incredibly terrible. but then again i'm never really there to deal with anything. if i'm not at work or at my grandparents or aunt's house then i'm over at matt's or hanging out with people. oh well... thanksgiving with the family was interesting as all holidays are. it wasn't actually too bad. it was kind of fun in a strange way. who would've known.
friends have been kinda strange lately. i am starting to feel like i'm losing my best friend. :-/ it feels like holly and i aren't as close anymore and that really sucks. maybe it's because she's at school and i never ever get to see her and that's a bitch and a 1/2. but even when we hang out or talk it just doesn't seem the same anymore. :'( there are a few things i want to talk to her about but i dont want her to get all upset/offended. it's nothing really bad but idk... i'm just worried about losing her. it sucks that i feel like this is happening but idk. i dont really want to address the issue that i really want to talk to her about in here because i dont think it's fair to bring up a subject in my journal that shouldn't be exposed to the whole wide world. it's just sometimes i wish i didn't have to share holly with other people. that i could have her all for myself all the time but i know that's not fair to everyone else. :-/ idk...
it's weird for the past two days i really haven't been answering my phone for anyone that's called. i think i have like 9 unheard voicemails sitting in my mailbox right now and i have no desire to listen to them because for one reason or another they'll probably just depress me.
i've been feeling really down lately. idk... time alone isn't really helping, reading time isn't either, work time blows so that doesn't help that just worsens the situation. and when i hang out with matt or sam or jess or steph it doesn't seem to come into play. :(
i dont know what i need to make it go away or to make it feel better. i'm glad senses fail is in 19 days though. two days of that should make my life a lot better. :) i hope. :-/ i mean it's not terrible but i guess i've just been missing out on a lot and that has been upsetting me.
i just want to spend time with my holly anne and have things go back to how they were last time this year and hang out with sam and jess more. i miss our ruby's nites soooooo much. when we had those nites i could get so much off my chest and walk away feeling better. i haven't seen jess in over a month and that makes me sad. i miss her. and see more of matt. we have such a good time when we hang out. :) we're such goofballs and it's just nice to sit around and relax and hang out with him and his friends.
this holiday season just seems to have such a large black cloud hanging overhead. :'( i just can't get into the holidays. i wasn't really excited for thanksgiving and i'm not exactly looking forward to xmas. idk... things just kinda suck and i dont want the holidays to come. all i really want this year is to be able to spend more time with my friends and get into school. maybe get a few new articles of clothing, a subscription to ap mag, and being able to buy presents for the people i want to. thank god my sister and i are splitting a lot of the cost. we're both paying 1/2 for my parents and our niece. what we got for my memere and pepere was cheap but thoughtful and what we're doing for our 2 aunts and uncles is nice and yet inexpensive. my sister and i agreed to spend no more than 20 on each other which is cool and neither of us are buying for our brothers. there are only two people that i'm buying for that are all on my own costs. but i'm not too worried about it. one person is pretty much done and the other i'm not too concerned about either. but that's all i want for xmas. it's not a lot for a girl to ask now is it?
i'll stop taking up all your time now. again i apologize for the lengthy update i've forced you to read.
i hope you all had a lovely thanksgiving and enjoyed ur time off school :) and that if i dont update before xmas you all enjoy yourself. i'm really going to try to get better at this again. i'm sorry for the bitchfest about work in the beginning.
xoxox... love you all
~amanda~
i've been working a lot but not 1/2 as much as i'd like to be. my "boss" erin is a fucking whore douche bag who is like on a mega power trip and she needs to learn her fucking place. so here's whats up with that. i used to work every sunday right... that wasn't a big deal although it could be a pain in my side sometimes it was nice because there isn't a whole lot to do on sundays anyways. well that came to a screeching friggin halt because erin now has elizabeth working in the department on sunday nites so i no longer have my sunday. which cut back my hours. :-/ ok that's not the worst part. because we are on holiday hours now we're open later which means in return the store is getting more hours. well not so for me. erin decided that i only need to work 5-10 or 6-10. what the fuck? seriously... it's not worth it for me to drive to work for only four hours. i'm sitting her ass down tomorrow when i go in and i'm telling her what's up. i want more hours and i want them in my department. this week i have the "joyous" (hint the sarcasm) pleasure of working in functional housewares (toasters/storage/crap/etc) tuesday and then working in bedding (the hole of the store which i fucking hate) on thursday morning. that's right in the am. now i am not a morning person in the slightest and that will come to a stop as well. i hate working mornings and they all know that but with her it's a common thing where she will schedule me to close at nite and then open the next morning. i dont have the privlege of living close to work. i drive anywhere from 20mins to 1/2 hour for work everyday and then that same length of time home. so i have a bitch drive. i also drive the furthest to and from work besides the general manager kevin. so i hate closing and then opening because when i close i do not get home until around 11ish and then i change into my jammies and talk on the phone for a bit and because i'm so used to not going to bed until 1-2 am i dont fall asleep until then or even afterward. and then i'm up and about at 7am so i can be at work for 9. it's complete shit. so i'm giving her a talking to and if i don't get better hours then they can fuck themselves at lnt and i'll go work elsewhere. it isn't fair to me that one week i'll have a full schedule of 37.5 hours and then the next week i'm cut down to 15. that's complete bullshit. i have bills just like everyone else in that store and i'm getting sick of being pushed around. this should be a fun talk seeing as in erin is a fucking bimbo dumbass who can't grasp the simple concept of time. *rolls eyes* wish me luck on that.
things at home haven't been incredibly terrible. but then again i'm never really there to deal with anything. if i'm not at work or at my grandparents or aunt's house then i'm over at matt's or hanging out with people. oh well... thanksgiving with the family was interesting as all holidays are. it wasn't actually too bad. it was kind of fun in a strange way. who would've known.
friends have been kinda strange lately. i am starting to feel like i'm losing my best friend. :-/ it feels like holly and i aren't as close anymore and that really sucks. maybe it's because she's at school and i never ever get to see her and that's a bitch and a 1/2. but even when we hang out or talk it just doesn't seem the same anymore. :'( there are a few things i want to talk to her about but i dont want her to get all upset/offended. it's nothing really bad but idk... i'm just worried about losing her. it sucks that i feel like this is happening but idk. i dont really want to address the issue that i really want to talk to her about in here because i dont think it's fair to bring up a subject in my journal that shouldn't be exposed to the whole wide world. it's just sometimes i wish i didn't have to share holly with other people. that i could have her all for myself all the time but i know that's not fair to everyone else. :-/ idk...
it's weird for the past two days i really haven't been answering my phone for anyone that's called. i think i have like 9 unheard voicemails sitting in my mailbox right now and i have no desire to listen to them because for one reason or another they'll probably just depress me.
i've been feeling really down lately. idk... time alone isn't really helping, reading time isn't either, work time blows so that doesn't help that just worsens the situation. and when i hang out with matt or sam or jess or steph it doesn't seem to come into play. :(
i dont know what i need to make it go away or to make it feel better. i'm glad senses fail is in 19 days though. two days of that should make my life a lot better. :) i hope. :-/ i mean it's not terrible but i guess i've just been missing out on a lot and that has been upsetting me.
i just want to spend time with my holly anne and have things go back to how they were last time this year and hang out with sam and jess more. i miss our ruby's nites soooooo much. when we had those nites i could get so much off my chest and walk away feeling better. i haven't seen jess in over a month and that makes me sad. i miss her. and see more of matt. we have such a good time when we hang out. :) we're such goofballs and it's just nice to sit around and relax and hang out with him and his friends.
this holiday season just seems to have such a large black cloud hanging overhead. :'( i just can't get into the holidays. i wasn't really excited for thanksgiving and i'm not exactly looking forward to xmas. idk... things just kinda suck and i dont want the holidays to come. all i really want this year is to be able to spend more time with my friends and get into school. maybe get a few new articles of clothing, a subscription to ap mag, and being able to buy presents for the people i want to. thank god my sister and i are splitting a lot of the cost. we're both paying 1/2 for my parents and our niece. what we got for my memere and pepere was cheap but thoughtful and what we're doing for our 2 aunts and uncles is nice and yet inexpensive. my sister and i agreed to spend no more than 20 on each other which is cool and neither of us are buying for our brothers. there are only two people that i'm buying for that are all on my own costs. but i'm not too worried about it. one person is pretty much done and the other i'm not too concerned about either. but that's all i want for xmas. it's not a lot for a girl to ask now is it?
i'll stop taking up all your time now. again i apologize for the lengthy update i've forced you to read.
i hope you all had a lovely thanksgiving and enjoyed ur time off school :) and that if i dont update before xmas you all enjoy yourself. i'm really going to try to get better at this again. i'm sorry for the bitchfest about work in the beginning.
xoxox... love you all
~amanda~