this has been a time and a half.
It's an absolutely beautiful day outside. We've had weeks and weeks of rain, grassy knolls hiding patches of mud and puddles on uneven areas of pavement. It's sunny outside, it might even be a little bit hot, dare I say. As always, there are pounds of work to do and not enough time to sit outside and enjoy the day.
I have a story to write for Ground Control that has been put off to the side because of the mounds of essays and midterms from the past two weeks. I'm only taking three classes but each had a paper due that was worth a huge part of our grades. My mind is muddles and I'm barely able to think right now. This is not the right time to force myself to buckle down. My mindset is just not ready for it at the moment and I just feel it's going to be a trying time for myself to be able to put things together.
I also have to write an expositional story for The New U about Qtrax.com which I hadn't even heard about until the Monday email came around from the Entertainment editors. Okay that research won't be tough to come by and I could write about how it might effect the music downloading world at large but I'm still having trouble bringing my ego back up from hurt.
I went to tear up for the first time in a good year and a half or so. I sat there and felt a little less intimidated because everyone around me was either my age or a little younger. The times I had gone before I was a scared little freshman at the coat tails of anyone who would let me write about something. They went through the paper, not many comments here and there but there were a few. They got to the cover of the Entertainment Section which had my show review of Mars Volta playing the Bren Center. This wasn't even going to be covered in the first place but we went ahead and put it together.
Man had it been torn a new one. Someone didn't know who the band was, there was another comment about having unimportant details that didn't do much for the show, someone else said that it wasn't a review of what happened at the show but a description of unimportant details. I understand, maybe the way I write is for a group that should already know the scene, should already be in tuned with what sort of things they might be set up to expect but I was just so embarrassed. I doubt anyone but the section editors knew it my my writing and all I wanted to do was crawl away and run out that door and just leave.
Okay I'm over it now. Here goes clearer, more concise writing - something I've always struggled with - and something everyone will be able to understand. It just gets to me because here I am, set up for wanting to do this for the rest of my life and this late in the game, this fucking late, there is still a lot of fine tuning that needs to be done. It's just a frightening realization and at this point in the collegiate sphere I should be set to perfection and ready for the world. It's just a matter of questioning myself and taking a closer look at what I can do.
Basically I have to understand that for different venues there are different modes of writing. I know I'm capable of molding myself into each of those types and it's a matter of hard work as well. I suppose the moments I've written about in the past have been just to get the story done and out there. I've put my mark on each project but thinking back there could have been more blood and not just a light sweaty perspiration.
Okay okay okay okay here goes.
I have a story to write for Ground Control that has been put off to the side because of the mounds of essays and midterms from the past two weeks. I'm only taking three classes but each had a paper due that was worth a huge part of our grades. My mind is muddles and I'm barely able to think right now. This is not the right time to force myself to buckle down. My mindset is just not ready for it at the moment and I just feel it's going to be a trying time for myself to be able to put things together.
I also have to write an expositional story for The New U about Qtrax.com which I hadn't even heard about until the Monday email came around from the Entertainment editors. Okay that research won't be tough to come by and I could write about how it might effect the music downloading world at large but I'm still having trouble bringing my ego back up from hurt.
I went to tear up for the first time in a good year and a half or so. I sat there and felt a little less intimidated because everyone around me was either my age or a little younger. The times I had gone before I was a scared little freshman at the coat tails of anyone who would let me write about something. They went through the paper, not many comments here and there but there were a few. They got to the cover of the Entertainment Section which had my show review of Mars Volta playing the Bren Center. This wasn't even going to be covered in the first place but we went ahead and put it together.
Man had it been torn a new one. Someone didn't know who the band was, there was another comment about having unimportant details that didn't do much for the show, someone else said that it wasn't a review of what happened at the show but a description of unimportant details. I understand, maybe the way I write is for a group that should already know the scene, should already be in tuned with what sort of things they might be set up to expect but I was just so embarrassed. I doubt anyone but the section editors knew it my my writing and all I wanted to do was crawl away and run out that door and just leave.
Okay I'm over it now. Here goes clearer, more concise writing - something I've always struggled with - and something everyone will be able to understand. It just gets to me because here I am, set up for wanting to do this for the rest of my life and this late in the game, this fucking late, there is still a lot of fine tuning that needs to be done. It's just a frightening realization and at this point in the collegiate sphere I should be set to perfection and ready for the world. It's just a matter of questioning myself and taking a closer look at what I can do.
Basically I have to understand that for different venues there are different modes of writing. I know I'm capable of molding myself into each of those types and it's a matter of hard work as well. I suppose the moments I've written about in the past have been just to get the story done and out there. I've put my mark on each project but thinking back there could have been more blood and not just a light sweaty perspiration.
Okay okay okay okay here goes.