.:i thought that the world had lost it's way, then I fell in love with you and you took that away:.
I was so motivated to clean yesterday. I got home from Miguel's house around 9ish in the morning (I couldn't sleep after he went to work) and I just started cleaning. Oh yes, and watching "Sex and the City" reruns on HBO on Demand.
Time Warner is terrible. Not like it is directly their fault or anything, but my HBO on Demand kept dying out on me, and it took me like 2 hours to watch a 28-minute episode of SATC. I called to tell Time Warner how important it was that I had full access to these episodes. Sir you don't understand, my roommates are all gone, my neighbors are gone, my boyfriend is at work, and all I want to do is watch the struggles of Carrie Bradshaw. Fendi, Gucci, Prada, what will she choose? Do you understand my situation? "No ma'am, I don't."
I cleaned the dishes that were in the sink first, because they were the smelliest. (I had fully intended on doing all of this cleaning prior to my departure to Christmas Hell, but just never had the time to do so with all of my last minute shopping.) So anywho, cleaning. I cleaned the dishes in the sink and that was disgusting, then moved on to the dishes on the counter and throwing away old pizza and Taco Cabana that had been residing on my kitchen table for something in the 2-week range.
My floor is fucking vile, I don’t even walk barefooted in my own apartment, I think I'll mop tonight, or soon at least. It's a damn good thing we have hard wood floors though; I would hate to see what carpet would look like after we lived with it for 5 months.
I stabbed myself with a pen this morning, it was obviously completely unintentional, but painful nonetheless. I was in a hurry, was trying to put the pen and the cap back together as one, and bam! right on the pointer finger on my left hand, I even started to bleed. This is just another indicator that Meggy and I are about as "special" as they come. Also, it's probably the office supply god getting even with me. I stole that pen from work.
Mullet. Why? Why god, why? I arrived at Grandma's house for Christmas, (aka the RedNeck Christmas) and my little cousin, 12-year-old Alan, runs out of the house to greet me. Dear god, I thought, a small hairy animal has attached itself to my cousin's neck! Get it off of him! Jesus help him! To bad he wasn't being attacked though; it was just this nasty fucking mullet. This child has lost his way; his dad, my ex-uncle, is weird, and has tainted the boy forevermore. He sat with me and Seth (my favorite cousin of all time) during dinner, and proceeded to tell us how he had been "outsmarted by a squirrel". I shit you not; he actually said those exact words. [This is where I will pause and let you insert your own jokes.] Seth and I were laughing so hard at him (he thought we were laughing with him) that we could barely speak.
Later that day, I approached my aunt, mullet's mother, about the condition of her son's hair.
Me: Aunt Margaret, is there a valid excuse for Alan's hair?
Her: You should have seen it before I took him to Sid.
Me: Who is Sid?
Her: The man at the barber shop who cut Alan's hair.
Me: Sid should be shot.
I took a picture of it, side view and all, for all of my Austin friends. It's just something you have to see to believe.
I worked out hardcore yesterday. Not just a little "I'm gonna work out just to say I worked out" sort of thing; I did legs, arms, abs, jogging, the bike, the whole 9-yards so to speak. I am paying for it now though. Pain. So much pain.
My New Years resolutions include leading a healthier lifestyle and quitting drinking beer. I honestly think that the healthy lifestyle thing will be so much easier than the beer thing. Candace not drinking beer? Blasphemy! I think I can do it though, as long as I keep vodka and diet tonic in close reach.
I was going to wait until the 1st to start the workout routine, but why wait, it's only 3 days, I'll start now. Miguel has started working out too, or he is at least talking about working out, and he tells me he is "a totally different person" when he starts working out. He said no more beer drinking and he is completely focused for a healthier life once he sets his mind to it. I could totally deal with that. I need that kind of influence in my life.
Time Warner is terrible. Not like it is directly their fault or anything, but my HBO on Demand kept dying out on me, and it took me like 2 hours to watch a 28-minute episode of SATC. I called to tell Time Warner how important it was that I had full access to these episodes. Sir you don't understand, my roommates are all gone, my neighbors are gone, my boyfriend is at work, and all I want to do is watch the struggles of Carrie Bradshaw. Fendi, Gucci, Prada, what will she choose? Do you understand my situation? "No ma'am, I don't."
I cleaned the dishes that were in the sink first, because they were the smelliest. (I had fully intended on doing all of this cleaning prior to my departure to Christmas Hell, but just never had the time to do so with all of my last minute shopping.) So anywho, cleaning. I cleaned the dishes in the sink and that was disgusting, then moved on to the dishes on the counter and throwing away old pizza and Taco Cabana that had been residing on my kitchen table for something in the 2-week range.
My floor is fucking vile, I don’t even walk barefooted in my own apartment, I think I'll mop tonight, or soon at least. It's a damn good thing we have hard wood floors though; I would hate to see what carpet would look like after we lived with it for 5 months.
I stabbed myself with a pen this morning, it was obviously completely unintentional, but painful nonetheless. I was in a hurry, was trying to put the pen and the cap back together as one, and bam! right on the pointer finger on my left hand, I even started to bleed. This is just another indicator that Meggy and I are about as "special" as they come. Also, it's probably the office supply god getting even with me. I stole that pen from work.
Mullet. Why? Why god, why? I arrived at Grandma's house for Christmas, (aka the RedNeck Christmas) and my little cousin, 12-year-old Alan, runs out of the house to greet me. Dear god, I thought, a small hairy animal has attached itself to my cousin's neck! Get it off of him! Jesus help him! To bad he wasn't being attacked though; it was just this nasty fucking mullet. This child has lost his way; his dad, my ex-uncle, is weird, and has tainted the boy forevermore. He sat with me and Seth (my favorite cousin of all time) during dinner, and proceeded to tell us how he had been "outsmarted by a squirrel". I shit you not; he actually said those exact words. [This is where I will pause and let you insert your own jokes.] Seth and I were laughing so hard at him (he thought we were laughing with him) that we could barely speak.
Later that day, I approached my aunt, mullet's mother, about the condition of her son's hair.
Me: Aunt Margaret, is there a valid excuse for Alan's hair?
Her: You should have seen it before I took him to Sid.
Me: Who is Sid?
Her: The man at the barber shop who cut Alan's hair.
Me: Sid should be shot.
I took a picture of it, side view and all, for all of my Austin friends. It's just something you have to see to believe.
I worked out hardcore yesterday. Not just a little "I'm gonna work out just to say I worked out" sort of thing; I did legs, arms, abs, jogging, the bike, the whole 9-yards so to speak. I am paying for it now though. Pain. So much pain.
My New Years resolutions include leading a healthier lifestyle and quitting drinking beer. I honestly think that the healthy lifestyle thing will be so much easier than the beer thing. Candace not drinking beer? Blasphemy! I think I can do it though, as long as I keep vodka and diet tonic in close reach.
I was going to wait until the 1st to start the workout routine, but why wait, it's only 3 days, I'll start now. Miguel has started working out too, or he is at least talking about working out, and he tells me he is "a totally different person" when he starts working out. He said no more beer drinking and he is completely focused for a healthier life once he sets his mind to it. I could totally deal with that. I need that kind of influence in my life.