I hope your heart jumped into your fucking throat.
Yesterday morning, I saw a wondrous thing.
I was driving along in traffic, headed to work, and there was a Ferrari ahead of me and to the right, in the slow lane. I was moving along nicely in the fast lane, not pushing my luck, but pretty happy that traffic wasn't oppressive. I looked in my rearview mirror, and saw a big Mercedes sedan coming up fast...I mean, 100+ mph.
What I saw scared me - not because he was going so fast, but because A) he was weaving in and out of cars, and B) it was a big, unmodified luxury sedan; knowing what I know about performance cars, that big boat doesn't have the suspension to handle a 100+ mph slalom without losing control.
The dude in the speeding Mercedes swerved around a few cars, and when he realized I was in his way, he swerved so close to me, he damn near clipped my rear bumper...he had to have missed by mere inches. My fucking dog was in the car...I got pissed. After clipping past me, he got stuck behind the Ferrari, and since everyone in both lanes got scared, everyone hit their brakes and the dude got stuck in the slow lane next to me.
I, being who I am, gave him the middle finger, which he smiled and returned gladly. I made the snap judgment that he was probably coked up. When traffic let up, he jumped on the gas and sped back up to his weaving, dangerous routine, and quickly got far ahead of me.
Here's where I go from pissed off to happy as a clam, and back to pissed off again.
Through the traffic, I'm keeping my eye on him as he makes a hard swerve from the inside-edge to the outside-edge of a sweeping corner (they're not so "sweeping" when you're doing 100 mph). How about that early apex? Exactly as expected, his car went off the road, sliding completely sideways, and throwing up an enormous dust cloud like you see in the picture above, before re-entering the road and carrying on. Somehow, he avoided hitting the guardrail, entirely out of sheer luck.
Fifteen seconds after this happened, the cloud was still there behind us, and a CHP officer entered the highway, having missed everything.