Serge gets fantastical with his electric accordion
Did you read that weird, kevin bacon-ey telenovela thing I left for you, Lor? Even if you didn't I'd like to add this little bit to it. I forgot to mention that the broad who plays super bitch Isa on Niños Ricos was also in El Autentico Rodrigo Leal. Of course you remember that novela. It's the one I found a month ago on Pasiones where Martin Karpan stars as Rodrigo, the guy on that reality show telling everyone he's gay while harboring a massive, non-gay boner for one of the show's hosts. (The other host is gay, and his husband is named Santiago. They have a pet turtle named Madonna. I thought you would want to know that, Lor) Yeah, Isa's in that as one of the other participants of the show. While not as much of a bitch on that novela, she was almost sold into prostitution by one of the seedy guests on their reality show hotel. And that makes me happy.
One more update on Amores de Mercado, the dude who plays Diego and the girl who plays Alex are in it, you already know this (or you should) but I found something new out today. The rich kid school the two of them attend? It's GMS! It's not called GMS here, obviously, but it's the same building. Also, their unis are cool! The boys wear pistachio green pants (really!) and blue plaid jackets/blazers with orange and matching green. The girls wear the same blue/orange/green plaid pattern on their skirts, of course. For some reason, "Diego" is such a long-haired douche in this he started picking on Alex's character. Her sister actually puts up the dukes and challenges him to a fight and he doesn't know how to react now that his dumb-ass buddies have stopped laughing at everything he says.
So then this girl totally punches him in the face.
And one more bit that I know you will absolutely adore.
Before Niños Ricos, there's a novela airing called Más Sabe el Diablo and guess who's in that shit! Gosh, what was her name, now? Paloma? From Passions? She's totally in that and I've been meaning to tell you since, like, forever. Like, I think before NR even started airing. True story. I'd tell you to check it out, but I know you won't. Not even for a Martimmy.
Now....Hello, LJ!
I would like to ramble about some muzak now, if I may.
I really want my own theme song. I want something with fat gee-tar licks, a thumping bass line and, oh what the hell, some disco violin. I would nominate Loba, but I need a song without so many female genitives in it (See below re: me being all that is man)
Okay, how about...gameboy soundchip synth, accordions and disco blips? No? I'll find it. Even if I have to scour the globe for some Colombians, Venezuelans, two Mexicans, a small Greenlandic girl with three names, all of which mean snow, and one geeky white guy, start my own band, and write it myself. I'd buy that.
I apologize to anyone who has read this far down, I seem to have gone too far in embracing this whole "not sleeping well" business. I am so amused by this right now, you don't even know.
Actually, no, stick with me. If any of you have any suggestions for possible Serge theme song-itude, send them my way. I will look it up, listen, and get back to you on the matter.
Has anyone seen the new Nelly Furtado video? What the hell is this shit? I've never been a fan Nelly Furtado, and her singing in Spanish again when she can't even speak the fuckin' language to pander to the latino market is just trashy. The English subtitles don't even reflect what is being sung. They're maybe 60% accurate at best.
Example! Me: Nelly Furtado sucks and is lame.
Subtitles: Nelly Furtado is fucking tits!
So now I know why Nigga calls himself Nigga. He's from Panama. He doesn't know any better. I do, however, keep accidentally calling him nigger. Shit, maybe he knew exactly what he was doing. What a little bitch, that Nigga. Haha, bitch Nigga.
I crack my shit up sometimes.
I swear, I must have seen the music video for Tokio Hotel's Monsoon, like, 20 times within this past week on Telehit. Mexico effing loves them. Are they very big here? I have absolutely no idea. And their singer, that is a guy, right? Is it creepy of me to ask for proof? It's nothing sexual, I just really want to know. This is purely in the interest of science. Usually a lack of boobs is all I need to go on, but these days it's just not that simple anymore.
If such proof were necessary for me to give I would do so gladly. But this is just not the case. Everyone already knows Serge is all that is man.
Speaking of manliness, I went back to Jack in the hizzy because I felt my Plex and Muno figures were quite lonely without a Brobee to chill with. They charged me for the toy this time, but that's cool. I still got the other two for free, suckas. All that is man.
Oh my God, where's my adam's apple?
Just kidding.
The US totally kicked some Trinidad & Tobagan ass! And then Mexico laid the hammer down on Honduras. It was their own fault. They were stupid enough to foul Giovani Dos Santos within sight of goal. The result was a scoring penalty kick. And then Honduras got mad and started playing like a bunch of little bitches. Sigh.
But oh my goodness, Mexico plays Colombia on the 30th! Ooh. The motherland versus the land of...well, you know. Sweet, sweet telenovela bliss!
Happy Beatles day, everyone! I'd like to make the purchase of some newly re-mastered CDs, but my shit is broke. Ditto for Beatles RockBand. And also 'cause I don't currently own any of the platforms that game is available on. Damn! Soon, though. Soon.
Still interested in what's goin' down on Niños Ricos? Good! Here's Monday's ep. I know it's kind of long, but it's mostly Santi/Diego goodness. Plus a fire at the end.
Santi and Diego are at Hard bar! They're still in good spirits over Matías and his brutal beatdown at the hands of fagdom! Oh, I think I like that better than fantastibad misadventures in vaginal spelunking. No, I can't choose! I love all my children equally.
Santiago says to Diego, he says, "I don't even know why we keep going to those parties."
'I do! I'm glad we went. I don't know where I got the strength to take Matías down like that!'
"That was amazing! I still can't believe you did that! It's a little embarrassing, but at that moment I felt really proud to be one of your friends. I know how corny that sounds, but it's true."
'You played a part, too. Thanks for taking me to the party.'
"Well, I had to do something to redeem myself, I'm really sorry about what I did at school."
'Hey, forget it.'
Aw! And once again, their bonds of friendship are renewed. So Diego says,
'Do you want something else to drink?'
"Yeah. Let's get something stronger."
'But you don't have an ID.'
"Oh, hell yes I do! Look at this!" Pfft, rich kids and their fake IDs.
'Okay, then! You're buying.'
Oh, I get so chatty when focusing on those two. This next part is important, though. All roads lead to Santiago.
So, Veronica couldn't get her plastic surgeon to do any work on her because he said she was perfectly fine and didn't need any work done. Veronica's thoughts: Uh, bullcrap!
What's an aging woman to do? Find some skeezy unscrupulous plastic surgeon who just wanna get paid. One of his co-worker nurse dudes has a conscience and asks Veronica for any emergency contacts, you know, just in case. She gives him gardener boy Gabriel's number.
So! Again.
So! Long story short, this doctor totally bitches up her face and she's, like, going into shock 'cause they fucked up on the anesthetic. Or some shit. Don't hate me but when there's a De La Torre onscreen and it's not Santiago, I kinda space out a little bit. So sorry!
So! Nurse dude calls up Gabriel and says he needs to get over here 'cause something's gone wrong with this procedure they were doing on Veronica. The Dr. is super pissed that nurse dude did that, 'cause they need to get the bitch out of here without drawing undesirable attention onto their loverly establishment. Gabriel shows up and the Dr. is all like...naw, bitch, ain't nobody here. We don't do that kind of shit.
So! Gabriel thinks somebody's prankin' him or some shit, but then nurse dude calls him again and says he's brought Veronica to the ER in Central Hospital. That's all he can do for her, he'll have to come by and sort things out.
So! Gabriel gets to Central Hospital but the doctors can't really tell him a whole lot because he isn't a family member. They need immediate family to sign off on some things so they can tend to her.
So! Gabriel calls his sister Martha, who is a maid in the De La Torre house, and asks for her to get in touch with Roberto, who is currently renting out a room at their place.
So! Martha says to Gabriel that she hasn't been able to get a hold of Roberto for a few days
So! Martha has to call Santiago instead!
See, I told you so.
So now we're back at Hard Bar, and the boys are enjoying what still looks like cola (whatever) Santi's phone rings and he's like "Mm, no. I don't know that number."
'Answer it. You never know. It might be an emergency?' How does he do that shit?
"Hello? Martha! Hi! What are you up to, calling at this hour?"
She tells him what's goin' down in Veronicatown.
'Santiago, your mom's in the hospital.'
"Haha, really? Don't tell me she's making a big deal over being drunk again. She'll be fine by tomorrow morning. Really."
But then she tells him she's in the ER and they may need to perform surgery on her and Santiago's face goes like this --> O_o
"Diego, I have to go. My mom's in the hospital."
'I'll go with you.'
"No. You don't have to leave, you can stay."
'Please, Santi. Let me come with you.'
He reluctantly agrees and off they go into the night!
When the two of them get to the hospital they meet up with Gabriel, Santiago wants to know why the crap they called him instead of a family member. Gabriel explains the situation to her as best he can and then the doctor shows up, Gabriel introduces Santiago as Veronica's son and Doc fills Santi in on how Veronica is comatose after some botched cosmetic surgery! Yay! They'll have to take her in for surgery to try and fix some of the damage that's been done but they need authorization from a family member first. Santi says he'll fill out or sign or do whatever the crap needs to be done for them to get crackin' on mommy.
Up in Jamaica, Isa can't get enough of calling Esteban impotent just like Esteban can't get his fill of calling Isa a repugnant, disgusting bitch. Esteban tries his luck calling Alex to see what she's up to. Alex very politely tells him to shove it up his ass. She asks him to not call her ever again, not talk to her at school ever again, "And if it's not too much trouble, go die!" <3
Diego's in the waiting room lookin' all nervous until Santiago comes back. He stands up and asks how His mom is doing. Santi explains the situation and Diego gives him a very loving hug. Santiago hugs him back and buries his head in his shoulder to have a good cry.
"This is all my fault, Diego!"
'what do you mean?'
"Things could have been different! If I wasn't giving her shit all the time for her drinking! And I could have maybe let her in and get to know me! The way I've treated her...if she dies it's my fault."
'It's not your fault, Santi. And she's not going to die.'
"How do you know?"
'Do you believe in God, Santi?'
"What? I don't know."
'Sure you do, all you have to do is have faith and pray. I want to take you someplace, Santi.'
"No, I'm not leaving."
'Santi, please. Let me take you. You'll see. Your mom's going to be all right.'
And together they leave, Diego with his arm around Santi's waist. (I mention it 'cause it was cute)
My Serge-sense is telling me there's some grief-stricken macking in their future. Actually, I thought Diego was going to try and kiss Santi when he buried his head in his shoulder. Oops. But hey, if Veronica pulls through, this could be a turning point in their mother/son relationship, which could lead to a turning point in Santiago accepting his outstanding gayness. You never know.
And you wanna know what Alex has been up to? Of course you do. Esteban's mom Monica hired some goons to set Guillermo's cabin on fire. With Guillermo, Lucía and Alex asleep within. They barely manage to escape the telenovelaBACKDRAFT! and Guillermo wastes no time telling the cops it was Monica San Miguel what done it. OoooOOoOooh~~
Anything else? Juan and Amelia finally fuck. And he recorded the shit out of it, yo.
See you tomorrow.
-
It's Tuesday! Diego has dropped off the face of the Earth, and Santi has minimal interaction with others. Some interesting stuff managed to happened, though.
Cesar comes home earlier than expected, only to find Juan and Amelia snugglin' up and asleep in his bed. He wakes them up all angry like and Juan, having done his damage, takes great pleasure in the situation. "Why, father, are you angry?"
He smart-asses his way through this whole scene. Oh, and he threw all of Amelia's clothes into the hot tub while she was asleep, so she's got nothing to wear but her undies. Which sucks for her, 'cause Cesar kicked both of them the hell out. Haw.
Also back from his dealings with Cesar and Jorge, Manuel's dad and COLOMBIAN DRUG LORD, YEAH!, Roberto is just getting in when Martha asks where he's been. "Did you miss me that much?" he jokes, but Martha's like, omg no something horrible's happened. Right away he's like, "Santiago?" but Martha's like omg no, he's fine, your wife is in the hospital. Like Santiago, he thinks she just had a few too many and says she'll be fine by the next day. But Martha's like, omg no your wife is in a coma and your ass needs to get to Central hospital.
Guillermo, Lucía and Alex have nowhere to go after their cabin almost burns down, but Eduardo takes them in. Karina gets to know Alex and takes a liking to her. Especially since she and Isa aren't exactly friends. She even gives her some clothes to wear.
Over in Jamaicatown, Esteban and Isa are still both un-sexed and miserable. She kicks Esteban out of the room for the night and says they're flying back home in the morning.
The next morning! Isa arrives at home and is wondering why the shit Alex is in her house. And wearing her clothes. Oooh! They get all catty again until Eduardo gets pissed and physically picks his daughter up and drags her into the house.
That same morning! Esteban arrives at home and mom is txting on her phone like a little schoolgirl. The cops come by and they want to question her about the fire that burned up Guillermo's cabin the previous night. Esteban is pretty pissed when he hears Alex could have died in that fire (Oh, and his dad, too, I guess) and knows his mom is perfectly capable of doing some crazy shaz like that.
Roberto arrives in the hospital and Santi's like, wtf dad, where the crap have you been? He tries to explain that he was on an important business trip that could get them out of the poorhouse. After filling out the paperwork so the doctors can get to work on Veronica, they finally get shit stabilized.
Once they hear about Veronica, Guillermo, Lucía and Alex get to the hospital, too. Santiago and Alex hug all cute while Roberto asks Lucía to move back in with them. He says Veronica's going to be needing her after this.
Veronica wakes up with Roberto in her hospital room. First she's like, where the crap am I? Why the crap am I here? What the crap are these bandages doing on my face? She asks for Santiago, Roberto says he's in the waiting room and Veronica says she needs to see him, aw.
Trying like crazy to find Alex, Esteban calls Santiago. "Where've you been?"
'I'm at the hospital. My mom was sent to the ER.'
"Really? Is she okay?"
'Do you care?'
"Of course I do."
'Uh-huh.'
"Alex isn't there with you, is she?" Now Santi understands.
'...Yeah, she's here somewhere.'
And off Esteban trots to the hospy.
Only when he gets there, Alex ain't happy to see him at all. "What the crap are you doing here?"
'How's your aunt?'
"Go ask Santiago. I think he's in the cafeteria right now." And she ignores his shit from then on. So Esteban has nothing else to do but try and talk to Santi.
This doesn't work very well, either. As Santi kindly tells him to save his bullshit lies for Alex, 'cause he ain't buyin' it. Esteban says he was just worried about how Alex was doing.
"Haven't you heard?"
'Heard what?'
"Somebody set the cabin Alex was staying in on fire with her, your aunt and my dad still asleep inside it. They barely managed to get out."
'What!? Why didn't she tell me?'
"I guess she didn't want to worry you? Maybe she figured you had enough to problems as it is."
Santi goes like this :O
"I'll call you later to ask how your mom is doing."
And just like that, Esteban leaves a bewildered Santiago by himself.
Whatever will happen tomorrow?
-
As it turns out, not that much. Welcome to Wednesday anyway.
Roberto, Lucía, Santiago and Alex are still at Central Hospital. The doctor on call tells them that Veronica is only allowed one visitor. Santi wants to stay but Roberto says he's been here all night and he should go home with Lucía and Alex to get some rest, he can come back early in the morning and take dad's place. Santiago reluctantly agrees, and he and Alex hold hands as they leave; it was so precious it makes you want to cough up puppies. I love when they do cute cousin stuff together like hug and hold hands. It's aw. Not that I do those things with any of my cousins, but I'm not all curly-haired and adorable, so it's different.
Here we is again, at the De La Torre house. Santi and Alex are hanging out in his room all comfy in their PJs and playing with his soccer ball throw pillows. I used to think those were actual soccer balls. Santi hits on a touchy subject,
"Why didn't you tell me about the cabin burning down?"
'Oh, I didn't want to bother you with something silly like that.'
"It's not silly Alex, you could have died! Somebody tried to kill you!"
'How do you know that?'
"I heard your mom talking to my dad."
Then talk of ever so slightly less unpleasant matters, that being Esteban. Alex swears that she's done with his shit and Santi hopes that's true but warns her to be careful and says that women are at their weakest when it comes to that one guy they like. And we all know Santi is an expert on that one guy he likes. Oh no, that's Diego. And Santi is that one guy he likes. haw.
Back at school the next morning, Dorotea lets the boys know that she knows she was drugged and when they ask if she has any proof she's like HELL YEAH I do! Mauro took her to the hospital so they have the results for all the tests they ran, and with them, definitive proof that she was..how do you spell that? Roofied? Rufied? Neither of those look right to me. My point is: They done fucked with a drink in a flagrant attempt to diddle Dorotea. Scandal! Oooh-aah.
She also reads to them the suicide note for the girl who killed herself whose name I can't remember. If she did this to make those rich little shits feel guilty she failed miserably. Juliana was even checking herself out on her laptops webcam while Dorotea was reading the note.
At Central Hospital that morning, Santiago is reading in his mom's hospital room when she wakes up, they get to talk for the first time since she comes to. They're fallin' all over each other with the apologies and shit. Santi is too adorable. Veronica asks Santiago to forgive him and he says there's nothing to forgive, you've heard this kind of stuff before, so let me get to the part where Veronica asks why she's got all those bandages on her head again and starts freakin' out hardcore while Santi tries to calm her down. She eventually stops shitting herself and one of the nurses come in and asks Santi to wait outside for a few minutes while she changes Veronica's dressings.
Outside, Santi asks his dad how they're going to pay for this. Manny's lawyer Vanessa gave Roberto a big fat chunk of change for coming along to discuss the conditions for Manny's dad's surrender to the government, so he tells Santiago he doesn't have to worry about it, he's made a deal that could save them from their money troubles. Santi tells him to be careful, 'cause he's super good at landing in trouble.
And that's really all of the super important stuff that happened today. Except for at the end, when David goes to Dorotea's office and says to her that he's the admin for the website the rich kids were using to exhibit their drugged up girlie friends. And he may have had something to do with that girl what killed herself. Oh shit, son!
-
It's Thursday, cousin!
So what the crap was David talking about? He says he posted the dead girl's pictures to the colegialalindacolegiala.com shortly before she killed herself. Man! I can't believe I forgot that website! Can you believe I've yet to visit it? My honor as a Niños Ricos fanchild has been compromised. So anyway, Dorotea says all that shit doesn't necessarily mean he had something to do with the girl committing suicide, but the fact that he doesn't want to divulge any names doesn't help her very much.
Diego and Lesbian Girl Laura are talking about the dead girl, and how they're not going to be bullied into doing the same thing when they get to Diego's car. Much to their chagrin, someone has taken it upon themelves to write HOMOS GET OUT across Diego's windshield. Laura freaks out and grabs on to Diego, but he ain't gonna take no shit, remember? He yells, to no one in particular that he's not afraid of whoever did this.
Santi's still in the hospital, still getting his read on, when Diego stops by to visit. Santi is delighted.
"Hey! What's up?"
'Santi, you look so tired! How's your mom?'
"She's doing a lot better now, thanks."
'Can I see her?'
"She's asleep right now."
'Then why don't we go for a drive, get a bite to eat or something?'
"I don't want to leave her alone."
'But she's sleeping, she won't even know you're gone.'
"Well...all right."
So off they trot, yo!
They're barely out the door when Gardener boy Gabriel comes in to see Veronica. Ooh~!
Veronica is delighted, only not at all. She doesn't want Gabriel to see her like this, she wants to be purdy for him. Gabe don't care (not so long as her giner still works!) he just wants to know that she's okay.
As luck would have it, Gabriel is leaving just as Santi and Diego are coming back!
The three of them meet each other in the hallway and Santi says, "What the hell do you think you're doing here, Gabriel?"
'I wanted to know how Miss Veronica was doing.'
"Why are you so worried? And why were you the one they called when they sent my mom to the ER over her own family?"
'I don't know. They must have found my number on her cell.'
"Just what kind of relationship do you have with my mother, Gabriel?"
'Strictly a gardener/boss relationship, young sir.'
"Listen, I don't think it's a good idea for you to come to the house anymore. Do I make myself clear?"
'No, young sir. Not at all.' And like that his shit is gone, yo. A politely confused Diego asks, 'Um, Santi? What was that?'
"That was me trying to hold what's left of my family together, Diego."
'I don't understand.'
"...That man is my mom's lover."
-
Aaaaand, nothing absolutely important (Read: regarding the boys you enjoy so much) happened for Friday. And yet, some halfway interesting shit managed to go down. Oh, boy!
Tonight's episode is called Manuel's Excellent Adventure!
But before that, let's go to the San Miguel house. Esteban's holding a glass and Monica's like, what the shit, I don't want you drinking in the house. Then Esteban's like, omgyoufuckinghypicriteeatmyshit, I'm just chewing on ice. She's heard along the grapevine that Isa's tellin' everybody and they' mama that he can't get it up. Esteban's like, nah, I just hate that bitch. Monica thinks the reason Esteban can't get it up is 'cause he's in wuv with Alex. And she says she'd rather see Alex dead than with Esteban. Oooh~
Vanessa gets a call from Cesar saying that she needs to keep a really fucking close eye on Manuel right now because now that various underground types are catching wind that Don Jorge intends to turn himself in they're goin' after his son. So get this, Vanessa calls Manuel to try and warn him of potential craziness, when she's too fucking late.
Manny's in one of his Narco-mobile SUVs with a bunch of bodyguards when this other SUV (haw) cuts them off and a bunch of dudes with big-ass guns jump out and start shooting at Manny's caravan. So now his bunch of dudes with big-ass guns jump out and start shooting back. When they push Manny to the floor of the car he drops his phone and you can see Vanessa calling on screen. Also you can see by the date on the phone that this scene was filmed the day after my birthday. Hoo-rah!
Vanessa freaks out 'cause Manuel won't answer his phone. Manuel's bunch of dudes won't answer the phone either, and now she thinks he's been kidnapped. Or maybe he's dead! He's not.
Having apparently been defeated, the other dudes take the fuck off. After the gun battle one of Manuel's bodyguards has been shot in the arm. Oh, and that guy over there? The one not really doin' a whole lot of anything? Yeah. He's dead. Their priority is to get Manuel the hell out of there but Manny wants to know what they're gonna do about that guy over there I just mentioned. The other guys are like, he knew what the job was. But Manny still wants medical attention for him, and for the guy who's got a bullet in his arm. They're like NOPE! And they push his ass back in the car and speed off to a safer place. And no phone contact with anyone 'cause somebody might be listening in! Oh, what fun!
Out for a joyride, Matías, Juan and PSP kid Miguel come up to a roadblock. Lots of police tape and a vehicle that's been shot to hell. Miguel's like, "Hey, isn't that one of Manuel's cars?"
"Oh my God, it is! What the hell happened here?"
"You think Manuel got all shot up?"
"Shut up, Matías, that's not funny!"
"Hey, I think I see a body over there!"
"Rest In Peace, my friend."
"Shut the hell up, Matías!"
"Hey, Miguel, give Juan some tissues, I think he's about to start crying like a little bitch."
"I'm not crying, Matías! But I don't want to think about Manuel being injured or dead."
Eventually Manny's like...you know what? I'm Manuel-Motherfucking-Cervantes and I'm giving the orders here, bitches! So he's basically like, Here's what's goin' down, chumpies! First they're to take Manuel to a safe place, then they take Cesar, the bodyguard what got shot in the arm, to a hospital. Afterwards they pick him up and once it's safe to contact each other again, they come for Manny.
So where is it he wants them to send him where he'll be safe? Ha! It's Rocío's place!
Meanwhile, at Rocío's place, gardener boy Gabriel is trying on a suit 'cause he's got a date with Isa tonight. That's right! A date with Isa. Sort of.
See, Isa is determined to get back at Esteban (and in the process maybe get a little piece of lower class ass) by hiring Gabriel as her new gardener. To celebrate this new business union she even invites Gabriel to dinner. Hence the suit. What Rocío has to say about Gabriel in a suit is priceless. You know that saying about lipstick on a pig? Well, we have that in Spanish, too. Only it's about silk. And a monkey!
Manuel shows up at Rocío's apartment complex and shoos away his bodyguards. No one would think to look for him here so he doesn't need them crampin' his style. Gabriel answers the door when he knocks and Manny just walks in. "Hi, Gabriel. I need your help." Gabriel says what he needs is to get up out of his house. He pushes him out of the door and shoves him all the way to the front gates, with Rocío and Martha following behind wondering what the hell is going on.
When Manuel tries to run back inside the gates to convince them to help him out Gabriel actually picks him up and carries him across his shoulder because Manny is so adorable and tiny. He's all, "Seriously! Please! I really do need your help!"
Once he can get Gabriel to listen, he tells them he was almost kidnapped, and how he really wants to stay because it seems Rocío is the only friend he's got.
See you next Monday!
¡Pásatelas super duuuper!
I'll wait, and I'll sit and watch the clouds as they go by
Totally un-tip-over-able!
Serge
One more update on Amores de Mercado, the dude who plays Diego and the girl who plays Alex are in it, you already know this (or you should) but I found something new out today. The rich kid school the two of them attend? It's GMS! It's not called GMS here, obviously, but it's the same building. Also, their unis are cool! The boys wear pistachio green pants (really!) and blue plaid jackets/blazers with orange and matching green. The girls wear the same blue/orange/green plaid pattern on their skirts, of course. For some reason, "Diego" is such a long-haired douche in this he started picking on Alex's character. Her sister actually puts up the dukes and challenges him to a fight and he doesn't know how to react now that his dumb-ass buddies have stopped laughing at everything he says.
So then this girl totally punches him in the face.
And one more bit that I know you will absolutely adore.
Before Niños Ricos, there's a novela airing called Más Sabe el Diablo and guess who's in that shit! Gosh, what was her name, now? Paloma? From Passions? She's totally in that and I've been meaning to tell you since, like, forever. Like, I think before NR even started airing. True story. I'd tell you to check it out, but I know you won't. Not even for a Martimmy.
Now....Hello, LJ!
I would like to ramble about some muzak now, if I may.
I really want my own theme song. I want something with fat gee-tar licks, a thumping bass line and, oh what the hell, some disco violin. I would nominate Loba, but I need a song without so many female genitives in it (See below re: me being all that is man)
Okay, how about...gameboy soundchip synth, accordions and disco blips? No? I'll find it. Even if I have to scour the globe for some Colombians, Venezuelans, two Mexicans, a small Greenlandic girl with three names, all of which mean snow, and one geeky white guy, start my own band, and write it myself. I'd buy that.
I apologize to anyone who has read this far down, I seem to have gone too far in embracing this whole "not sleeping well" business. I am so amused by this right now, you don't even know.
Actually, no, stick with me. If any of you have any suggestions for possible Serge theme song-itude, send them my way. I will look it up, listen, and get back to you on the matter.
Has anyone seen the new Nelly Furtado video? What the hell is this shit? I've never been a fan Nelly Furtado, and her singing in Spanish again when she can't even speak the fuckin' language to pander to the latino market is just trashy. The English subtitles don't even reflect what is being sung. They're maybe 60% accurate at best.
Example! Me: Nelly Furtado sucks and is lame.
Subtitles: Nelly Furtado is fucking tits!
So now I know why Nigga calls himself Nigga. He's from Panama. He doesn't know any better. I do, however, keep accidentally calling him nigger. Shit, maybe he knew exactly what he was doing. What a little bitch, that Nigga. Haha, bitch Nigga.
I crack my shit up sometimes.
I swear, I must have seen the music video for Tokio Hotel's Monsoon, like, 20 times within this past week on Telehit. Mexico effing loves them. Are they very big here? I have absolutely no idea. And their singer, that is a guy, right? Is it creepy of me to ask for proof? It's nothing sexual, I just really want to know. This is purely in the interest of science. Usually a lack of boobs is all I need to go on, but these days it's just not that simple anymore.
If such proof were necessary for me to give I would do so gladly. But this is just not the case. Everyone already knows Serge is all that is man.
Speaking of manliness, I went back to Jack in the hizzy because I felt my Plex and Muno figures were quite lonely without a Brobee to chill with. They charged me for the toy this time, but that's cool. I still got the other two for free, suckas. All that is man.
Oh my God, where's my adam's apple?
Just kidding.
The US totally kicked some Trinidad & Tobagan ass! And then Mexico laid the hammer down on Honduras. It was their own fault. They were stupid enough to foul Giovani Dos Santos within sight of goal. The result was a scoring penalty kick. And then Honduras got mad and started playing like a bunch of little bitches. Sigh.
But oh my goodness, Mexico plays Colombia on the 30th! Ooh. The motherland versus the land of...well, you know. Sweet, sweet telenovela bliss!
Happy Beatles day, everyone! I'd like to make the purchase of some newly re-mastered CDs, but my shit is broke. Ditto for Beatles RockBand. And also 'cause I don't currently own any of the platforms that game is available on. Damn! Soon, though. Soon.
Still interested in what's goin' down on Niños Ricos? Good! Here's Monday's ep. I know it's kind of long, but it's mostly Santi/Diego goodness. Plus a fire at the end.
Santi and Diego are at Hard bar! They're still in good spirits over Matías and his brutal beatdown at the hands of fagdom! Oh, I think I like that better than fantastibad misadventures in vaginal spelunking. No, I can't choose! I love all my children equally.
Santiago says to Diego, he says, "I don't even know why we keep going to those parties."
'I do! I'm glad we went. I don't know where I got the strength to take Matías down like that!'
"That was amazing! I still can't believe you did that! It's a little embarrassing, but at that moment I felt really proud to be one of your friends. I know how corny that sounds, but it's true."
'You played a part, too. Thanks for taking me to the party.'
"Well, I had to do something to redeem myself, I'm really sorry about what I did at school."
'Hey, forget it.'
Aw! And once again, their bonds of friendship are renewed. So Diego says,
'Do you want something else to drink?'
"Yeah. Let's get something stronger."
'But you don't have an ID.'
"Oh, hell yes I do! Look at this!" Pfft, rich kids and their fake IDs.
'Okay, then! You're buying.'
Oh, I get so chatty when focusing on those two. This next part is important, though. All roads lead to Santiago.
So, Veronica couldn't get her plastic surgeon to do any work on her because he said she was perfectly fine and didn't need any work done. Veronica's thoughts: Uh, bullcrap!
What's an aging woman to do? Find some skeezy unscrupulous plastic surgeon who just wanna get paid. One of his co-worker nurse dudes has a conscience and asks Veronica for any emergency contacts, you know, just in case. She gives him gardener boy Gabriel's number.
So! Again.
So! Long story short, this doctor totally bitches up her face and she's, like, going into shock 'cause they fucked up on the anesthetic. Or some shit. Don't hate me but when there's a De La Torre onscreen and it's not Santiago, I kinda space out a little bit. So sorry!
So! Nurse dude calls up Gabriel and says he needs to get over here 'cause something's gone wrong with this procedure they were doing on Veronica. The Dr. is super pissed that nurse dude did that, 'cause they need to get the bitch out of here without drawing undesirable attention onto their loverly establishment. Gabriel shows up and the Dr. is all like...naw, bitch, ain't nobody here. We don't do that kind of shit.
So! Gabriel thinks somebody's prankin' him or some shit, but then nurse dude calls him again and says he's brought Veronica to the ER in Central Hospital. That's all he can do for her, he'll have to come by and sort things out.
So! Gabriel gets to Central Hospital but the doctors can't really tell him a whole lot because he isn't a family member. They need immediate family to sign off on some things so they can tend to her.
So! Gabriel calls his sister Martha, who is a maid in the De La Torre house, and asks for her to get in touch with Roberto, who is currently renting out a room at their place.
So! Martha says to Gabriel that she hasn't been able to get a hold of Roberto for a few days
So! Martha has to call Santiago instead!
See, I told you so.
So now we're back at Hard Bar, and the boys are enjoying what still looks like cola (whatever) Santi's phone rings and he's like "Mm, no. I don't know that number."
'Answer it. You never know. It might be an emergency?' How does he do that shit?
"Hello? Martha! Hi! What are you up to, calling at this hour?"
She tells him what's goin' down in Veronicatown.
'Santiago, your mom's in the hospital.'
"Haha, really? Don't tell me she's making a big deal over being drunk again. She'll be fine by tomorrow morning. Really."
But then she tells him she's in the ER and they may need to perform surgery on her and Santiago's face goes like this --> O_o
"Diego, I have to go. My mom's in the hospital."
'I'll go with you.'
"No. You don't have to leave, you can stay."
'Please, Santi. Let me come with you.'
He reluctantly agrees and off they go into the night!
When the two of them get to the hospital they meet up with Gabriel, Santiago wants to know why the crap they called him instead of a family member. Gabriel explains the situation to her as best he can and then the doctor shows up, Gabriel introduces Santiago as Veronica's son and Doc fills Santi in on how Veronica is comatose after some botched cosmetic surgery! Yay! They'll have to take her in for surgery to try and fix some of the damage that's been done but they need authorization from a family member first. Santi says he'll fill out or sign or do whatever the crap needs to be done for them to get crackin' on mommy.
Up in Jamaica, Isa can't get enough of calling Esteban impotent just like Esteban can't get his fill of calling Isa a repugnant, disgusting bitch. Esteban tries his luck calling Alex to see what she's up to. Alex very politely tells him to shove it up his ass. She asks him to not call her ever again, not talk to her at school ever again, "And if it's not too much trouble, go die!" <3
Diego's in the waiting room lookin' all nervous until Santiago comes back. He stands up and asks how His mom is doing. Santi explains the situation and Diego gives him a very loving hug. Santiago hugs him back and buries his head in his shoulder to have a good cry.
"This is all my fault, Diego!"
'what do you mean?'
"Things could have been different! If I wasn't giving her shit all the time for her drinking! And I could have maybe let her in and get to know me! The way I've treated her...if she dies it's my fault."
'It's not your fault, Santi. And she's not going to die.'
"How do you know?"
'Do you believe in God, Santi?'
"What? I don't know."
'Sure you do, all you have to do is have faith and pray. I want to take you someplace, Santi.'
"No, I'm not leaving."
'Santi, please. Let me take you. You'll see. Your mom's going to be all right.'
And together they leave, Diego with his arm around Santi's waist. (I mention it 'cause it was cute)
My Serge-sense is telling me there's some grief-stricken macking in their future. Actually, I thought Diego was going to try and kiss Santi when he buried his head in his shoulder. Oops. But hey, if Veronica pulls through, this could be a turning point in their mother/son relationship, which could lead to a turning point in Santiago accepting his outstanding gayness. You never know.
And you wanna know what Alex has been up to? Of course you do. Esteban's mom Monica hired some goons to set Guillermo's cabin on fire. With Guillermo, Lucía and Alex asleep within. They barely manage to escape the telenovelaBACKDRAFT! and Guillermo wastes no time telling the cops it was Monica San Miguel what done it. OoooOOoOooh~~
Anything else? Juan and Amelia finally fuck. And he recorded the shit out of it, yo.
See you tomorrow.
-
It's Tuesday! Diego has dropped off the face of the Earth, and Santi has minimal interaction with others. Some interesting stuff managed to happened, though.
Cesar comes home earlier than expected, only to find Juan and Amelia snugglin' up and asleep in his bed. He wakes them up all angry like and Juan, having done his damage, takes great pleasure in the situation. "Why, father, are you angry?"
He smart-asses his way through this whole scene. Oh, and he threw all of Amelia's clothes into the hot tub while she was asleep, so she's got nothing to wear but her undies. Which sucks for her, 'cause Cesar kicked both of them the hell out. Haw.
Also back from his dealings with Cesar and Jorge, Manuel's dad and COLOMBIAN DRUG LORD, YEAH!, Roberto is just getting in when Martha asks where he's been. "Did you miss me that much?" he jokes, but Martha's like, omg no something horrible's happened. Right away he's like, "Santiago?" but Martha's like omg no, he's fine, your wife is in the hospital. Like Santiago, he thinks she just had a few too many and says she'll be fine by the next day. But Martha's like, omg no your wife is in a coma and your ass needs to get to Central hospital.
Guillermo, Lucía and Alex have nowhere to go after their cabin almost burns down, but Eduardo takes them in. Karina gets to know Alex and takes a liking to her. Especially since she and Isa aren't exactly friends. She even gives her some clothes to wear.
Over in Jamaicatown, Esteban and Isa are still both un-sexed and miserable. She kicks Esteban out of the room for the night and says they're flying back home in the morning.
The next morning! Isa arrives at home and is wondering why the shit Alex is in her house. And wearing her clothes. Oooh! They get all catty again until Eduardo gets pissed and physically picks his daughter up and drags her into the house.
That same morning! Esteban arrives at home and mom is txting on her phone like a little schoolgirl. The cops come by and they want to question her about the fire that burned up Guillermo's cabin the previous night. Esteban is pretty pissed when he hears Alex could have died in that fire (Oh, and his dad, too, I guess) and knows his mom is perfectly capable of doing some crazy shaz like that.
Roberto arrives in the hospital and Santi's like, wtf dad, where the crap have you been? He tries to explain that he was on an important business trip that could get them out of the poorhouse. After filling out the paperwork so the doctors can get to work on Veronica, they finally get shit stabilized.
Once they hear about Veronica, Guillermo, Lucía and Alex get to the hospital, too. Santiago and Alex hug all cute while Roberto asks Lucía to move back in with them. He says Veronica's going to be needing her after this.
Veronica wakes up with Roberto in her hospital room. First she's like, where the crap am I? Why the crap am I here? What the crap are these bandages doing on my face? She asks for Santiago, Roberto says he's in the waiting room and Veronica says she needs to see him, aw.
Trying like crazy to find Alex, Esteban calls Santiago. "Where've you been?"
'I'm at the hospital. My mom was sent to the ER.'
"Really? Is she okay?"
'Do you care?'
"Of course I do."
'Uh-huh.'
"Alex isn't there with you, is she?" Now Santi understands.
'...Yeah, she's here somewhere.'
And off Esteban trots to the hospy.
Only when he gets there, Alex ain't happy to see him at all. "What the crap are you doing here?"
'How's your aunt?'
"Go ask Santiago. I think he's in the cafeteria right now." And she ignores his shit from then on. So Esteban has nothing else to do but try and talk to Santi.
This doesn't work very well, either. As Santi kindly tells him to save his bullshit lies for Alex, 'cause he ain't buyin' it. Esteban says he was just worried about how Alex was doing.
"Haven't you heard?"
'Heard what?'
"Somebody set the cabin Alex was staying in on fire with her, your aunt and my dad still asleep inside it. They barely managed to get out."
'What!? Why didn't she tell me?'
"I guess she didn't want to worry you? Maybe she figured you had enough to problems as it is."
Santi goes like this :O
"I'll call you later to ask how your mom is doing."
And just like that, Esteban leaves a bewildered Santiago by himself.
Whatever will happen tomorrow?
-
As it turns out, not that much. Welcome to Wednesday anyway.
Roberto, Lucía, Santiago and Alex are still at Central Hospital. The doctor on call tells them that Veronica is only allowed one visitor. Santi wants to stay but Roberto says he's been here all night and he should go home with Lucía and Alex to get some rest, he can come back early in the morning and take dad's place. Santiago reluctantly agrees, and he and Alex hold hands as they leave; it was so precious it makes you want to cough up puppies. I love when they do cute cousin stuff together like hug and hold hands. It's aw. Not that I do those things with any of my cousins, but I'm not all curly-haired and adorable, so it's different.
Here we is again, at the De La Torre house. Santi and Alex are hanging out in his room all comfy in their PJs and playing with his soccer ball throw pillows. I used to think those were actual soccer balls. Santi hits on a touchy subject,
"Why didn't you tell me about the cabin burning down?"
'Oh, I didn't want to bother you with something silly like that.'
"It's not silly Alex, you could have died! Somebody tried to kill you!"
'How do you know that?'
"I heard your mom talking to my dad."
Then talk of ever so slightly less unpleasant matters, that being Esteban. Alex swears that she's done with his shit and Santi hopes that's true but warns her to be careful and says that women are at their weakest when it comes to that one guy they like. And we all know Santi is an expert on that one guy he likes. Oh no, that's Diego. And Santi is that one guy he likes. haw.
Back at school the next morning, Dorotea lets the boys know that she knows she was drugged and when they ask if she has any proof she's like HELL YEAH I do! Mauro took her to the hospital so they have the results for all the tests they ran, and with them, definitive proof that she was..how do you spell that? Roofied? Rufied? Neither of those look right to me. My point is: They done fucked with a drink in a flagrant attempt to diddle Dorotea. Scandal! Oooh-aah.
She also reads to them the suicide note for the girl who killed herself whose name I can't remember. If she did this to make those rich little shits feel guilty she failed miserably. Juliana was even checking herself out on her laptops webcam while Dorotea was reading the note.
At Central Hospital that morning, Santiago is reading in his mom's hospital room when she wakes up, they get to talk for the first time since she comes to. They're fallin' all over each other with the apologies and shit. Santi is too adorable. Veronica asks Santiago to forgive him and he says there's nothing to forgive, you've heard this kind of stuff before, so let me get to the part where Veronica asks why she's got all those bandages on her head again and starts freakin' out hardcore while Santi tries to calm her down. She eventually stops shitting herself and one of the nurses come in and asks Santi to wait outside for a few minutes while she changes Veronica's dressings.
Outside, Santi asks his dad how they're going to pay for this. Manny's lawyer Vanessa gave Roberto a big fat chunk of change for coming along to discuss the conditions for Manny's dad's surrender to the government, so he tells Santiago he doesn't have to worry about it, he's made a deal that could save them from their money troubles. Santi tells him to be careful, 'cause he's super good at landing in trouble.
And that's really all of the super important stuff that happened today. Except for at the end, when David goes to Dorotea's office and says to her that he's the admin for the website the rich kids were using to exhibit their drugged up girlie friends. And he may have had something to do with that girl what killed herself. Oh shit, son!
-
It's Thursday, cousin!
So what the crap was David talking about? He says he posted the dead girl's pictures to the colegialalindacolegiala.com shortly before she killed herself. Man! I can't believe I forgot that website! Can you believe I've yet to visit it? My honor as a Niños Ricos fanchild has been compromised. So anyway, Dorotea says all that shit doesn't necessarily mean he had something to do with the girl committing suicide, but the fact that he doesn't want to divulge any names doesn't help her very much.
Diego and Lesbian Girl Laura are talking about the dead girl, and how they're not going to be bullied into doing the same thing when they get to Diego's car. Much to their chagrin, someone has taken it upon themelves to write HOMOS GET OUT across Diego's windshield. Laura freaks out and grabs on to Diego, but he ain't gonna take no shit, remember? He yells, to no one in particular that he's not afraid of whoever did this.
Santi's still in the hospital, still getting his read on, when Diego stops by to visit. Santi is delighted.
"Hey! What's up?"
'Santi, you look so tired! How's your mom?'
"She's doing a lot better now, thanks."
'Can I see her?'
"She's asleep right now."
'Then why don't we go for a drive, get a bite to eat or something?'
"I don't want to leave her alone."
'But she's sleeping, she won't even know you're gone.'
"Well...all right."
So off they trot, yo!
They're barely out the door when Gardener boy Gabriel comes in to see Veronica. Ooh~!
Veronica is delighted, only not at all. She doesn't want Gabriel to see her like this, she wants to be purdy for him. Gabe don't care (not so long as her giner still works!) he just wants to know that she's okay.
As luck would have it, Gabriel is leaving just as Santi and Diego are coming back!
The three of them meet each other in the hallway and Santi says, "What the hell do you think you're doing here, Gabriel?"
'I wanted to know how Miss Veronica was doing.'
"Why are you so worried? And why were you the one they called when they sent my mom to the ER over her own family?"
'I don't know. They must have found my number on her cell.'
"Just what kind of relationship do you have with my mother, Gabriel?"
'Strictly a gardener/boss relationship, young sir.'
"Listen, I don't think it's a good idea for you to come to the house anymore. Do I make myself clear?"
'No, young sir. Not at all.' And like that his shit is gone, yo. A politely confused Diego asks, 'Um, Santi? What was that?'
"That was me trying to hold what's left of my family together, Diego."
'I don't understand.'
"...That man is my mom's lover."
-
Aaaaand, nothing absolutely important (Read: regarding the boys you enjoy so much) happened for Friday. And yet, some halfway interesting shit managed to go down. Oh, boy!
Tonight's episode is called Manuel's Excellent Adventure!
But before that, let's go to the San Miguel house. Esteban's holding a glass and Monica's like, what the shit, I don't want you drinking in the house. Then Esteban's like, omgyoufuckinghypicriteeatmyshit, I'm just chewing on ice. She's heard along the grapevine that Isa's tellin' everybody and they' mama that he can't get it up. Esteban's like, nah, I just hate that bitch. Monica thinks the reason Esteban can't get it up is 'cause he's in wuv with Alex. And she says she'd rather see Alex dead than with Esteban. Oooh~
Vanessa gets a call from Cesar saying that she needs to keep a really fucking close eye on Manuel right now because now that various underground types are catching wind that Don Jorge intends to turn himself in they're goin' after his son. So get this, Vanessa calls Manuel to try and warn him of potential craziness, when she's too fucking late.
Manny's in one of his Narco-mobile SUVs with a bunch of bodyguards when this other SUV (haw) cuts them off and a bunch of dudes with big-ass guns jump out and start shooting at Manny's caravan. So now his bunch of dudes with big-ass guns jump out and start shooting back. When they push Manny to the floor of the car he drops his phone and you can see Vanessa calling on screen. Also you can see by the date on the phone that this scene was filmed the day after my birthday. Hoo-rah!
Vanessa freaks out 'cause Manuel won't answer his phone. Manuel's bunch of dudes won't answer the phone either, and now she thinks he's been kidnapped. Or maybe he's dead! He's not.
Having apparently been defeated, the other dudes take the fuck off. After the gun battle one of Manuel's bodyguards has been shot in the arm. Oh, and that guy over there? The one not really doin' a whole lot of anything? Yeah. He's dead. Their priority is to get Manuel the hell out of there but Manny wants to know what they're gonna do about that guy over there I just mentioned. The other guys are like, he knew what the job was. But Manny still wants medical attention for him, and for the guy who's got a bullet in his arm. They're like NOPE! And they push his ass back in the car and speed off to a safer place. And no phone contact with anyone 'cause somebody might be listening in! Oh, what fun!
Out for a joyride, Matías, Juan and PSP kid Miguel come up to a roadblock. Lots of police tape and a vehicle that's been shot to hell. Miguel's like, "Hey, isn't that one of Manuel's cars?"
"Oh my God, it is! What the hell happened here?"
"You think Manuel got all shot up?"
"Shut up, Matías, that's not funny!"
"Hey, I think I see a body over there!"
"Rest In Peace, my friend."
"Shut the hell up, Matías!"
"Hey, Miguel, give Juan some tissues, I think he's about to start crying like a little bitch."
"I'm not crying, Matías! But I don't want to think about Manuel being injured or dead."
Eventually Manny's like...you know what? I'm Manuel-Motherfucking-Cervantes and I'm giving the orders here, bitches! So he's basically like, Here's what's goin' down, chumpies! First they're to take Manuel to a safe place, then they take Cesar, the bodyguard what got shot in the arm, to a hospital. Afterwards they pick him up and once it's safe to contact each other again, they come for Manny.
So where is it he wants them to send him where he'll be safe? Ha! It's Rocío's place!
Meanwhile, at Rocío's place, gardener boy Gabriel is trying on a suit 'cause he's got a date with Isa tonight. That's right! A date with Isa. Sort of.
See, Isa is determined to get back at Esteban (and in the process maybe get a little piece of lower class ass) by hiring Gabriel as her new gardener. To celebrate this new business union she even invites Gabriel to dinner. Hence the suit. What Rocío has to say about Gabriel in a suit is priceless. You know that saying about lipstick on a pig? Well, we have that in Spanish, too. Only it's about silk. And a monkey!
Manuel shows up at Rocío's apartment complex and shoos away his bodyguards. No one would think to look for him here so he doesn't need them crampin' his style. Gabriel answers the door when he knocks and Manny just walks in. "Hi, Gabriel. I need your help." Gabriel says what he needs is to get up out of his house. He pushes him out of the door and shoves him all the way to the front gates, with Rocío and Martha following behind wondering what the hell is going on.
When Manuel tries to run back inside the gates to convince them to help him out Gabriel actually picks him up and carries him across his shoulder because Manny is so adorable and tiny. He's all, "Seriously! Please! I really do need your help!"
Once he can get Gabriel to listen, he tells them he was almost kidnapped, and how he really wants to stay because it seems Rocío is the only friend he's got.
See you next Monday!
¡Pásatelas super duuuper!
I'll wait, and I'll sit and watch the clouds as they go by
Totally un-tip-over-able!
Serge