WARNING: This won't make much sense.
I'm very scattered these days. Perhaps I'm doing too much? Or not enough? I'm not quite sure. It's most likely all in my head. I've yet to do things I said I would do back in May (pretty much since I got back home). I do feel like the summer has been rather decent. I've done a lot. I went to Cape Cod four times. Saw a lot of movies. Bought some new albums which I love. I just hope there's more romance this fall and winter. We've been so busy, and as a result the summer zipped by. I am happy about one thing though: I don't fear this fall. I am excited about this fall. Usually I'm afraid to let go of the summer, which I still feel, but this season looks promising. And a big plus is I won't be leaving again, I'll just be working. As much as I liked being in Toronto, I'm happy I'll be home this time. I still have weird flashbacks, and I sometimes wake up thinking I'm still there. But then there are times when I forget and it's like it was all a dream. I am glad that the one real friend I had is still keeping in touch with me. I feel like it means we'll see each other again and possibly do some work together. Makes me want to contact the other friend, whom I think was a real friend. But at the end of the day, I'm glad I'll be in Worcester this fall...yes, shocking. It's strange that, this was the third summer Ashley and I have spent together, but this will only be the second fall. Which is probably why I'm more excited this time around. I missed Thanksgiving last year too. Christmas was rushed. Yeah I'm looking forward to this season. We're going to see Rilo Kiley, Smashing Pumpkins; Dane Cook has two new movies and an album coming out. Not to mention that I have two musical projects and two jobs to boot (thanks friend). I feel like I'm set for this season, but I wonder about 2008. I still have to persue the things that I love, I just don't know where to begin. Basically I'm somewhat set with music: we're playing, attempting to record, and booking shows. I'm content with that. But my film "career" has been sitting on the crapper and I wonder if it has climbed out the window since...I'm not even sure what that means, but...it's true! I did purchase a new mini-DV though. Not the best, but cheap. I have ideas for starter projects. It's just the matter of organizing them. Then there's the writing. It feels good to write this entry. I haven't really written this much since...? I think it's all the matter of turning off my brain and just hitting the cruise control. Having two jobs and two musical projects has boosted my self esteem. It has. Now I just need to backtrack and pick up some pieces. So, do I have this all figure out now that I have written it out? We shall see. Little things seem to bring me down majorly lately. It's terrible. I need to build some strength. Keep on keepin' on, I suppose. The weirdness continues...