(no subject)

[pumpkinking13]

I am so happy kinda..I have 2 days off in a row. That is soooo shibiness but the bad thing about it after those 2 days I am gonna have to work 7 straight days until next Wed. July 5th. until I have my next day off. Oh well Im enjoying it. I found one of my rings i liked to wear but lost yea!!!!!!! A couple days ago I bought myself a ring with the August birthstone(forget who to spell the name) in the center . It is 10k gold. I dont normally wear gold but I liked that ring very much. Instead of buying my birthstone(April) I bought the stone that I was concieved(or whatever). Anyway yea for both!!! I am reading a Nirvana book(again) it is called"Come as you are: the true story of Nirvana" and in it it basically telles the story about everybody and all of that. In it it tells about a guy Kurt made friends with and Kurt found out he was gay and he was like I dont mind as long as you dont try anything with me. And after awhile people would start to pick on him and beat him up because they thought he was gay because he was hanging out with a gay guy. After awhile after that they all started to stere clear of him and Kurt said something that will be on my head for the rest of my life----"I was proud of the fact I was gay even though I really wasn't"-OMG!!! IF ONLY THAT WAS TRUE I WOULD DIE A HAPPY MAN SWEETNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I get my first paycheck this Thursday I think Ill get around 450 to 500 dollars. Im gonna cash it at walmart and then go buy fireworks to surprise my baby brother like me and Austin did for him on New Years. Then Ill take some for myself and save it when I go up to my dads for 2 weeks Ill buy Summer the Lacuna Coil cd and the rest Ill give to my mom to help with things. I dont care what she says shes gonna take it. I was gonna do some things outside today around the yard but my mom says its gonna rain and whatnot so it looks like Ill just do some things around the inside of the house. Or maybe not and just be lazy hahahahahaha I dont know. Yesterday when I was bringing in some karts I went in to help someone do a carryout and all the workers that saw me said I looked like death gone bad. I thought it was funny until I looked in the mirror then after I got some gatorade I sat down and when I tried to get up I couldnt I started to breath really heavy and had to lay down for a couple minutes. Last night my mom was "disiplineing" my baby brother and whenever she does she does it harder then she ever did me and Austin just to prove that she does disipline him because me and Austin always told her she never did so whenever she does it she doesz it harder just to try to prove us wrong when in fact she justs proving that she has no idea whats shes doing. Then she started going off on me and was like if I catch you with more than one thing one in your room at a time your paying the electric bill from now on. I was like 1 dont yell at me just because your yelling at my brother 2 dont fucking tell me that becayse Austin always listened to music watch tv had the light on he read constantly and then he was on the phone like 3 times as much as me and yet I get yelled at if Im watching tv and my lights on whil Im reading a book or whatever. She says she treats us the same when in fact she is a total liar about that shit. Compared to him she treats me like fucking crap! She says she doesnt play favorites and she does. I thought of running away plenty of times but the only thing that is keeping me here is my baby brother because I love him to much and I dont want to leave him here alone with the crazy mom(sometimes) when she "tries" to disipline. Nikis at the beach for 2 weeks and then I go to Boston for 2 weeks so it looks like Im gonna be waiting to see her even longer than I expected but Ill be willing to wait for her throught hells flames and all the torture Ill get and am. I wanna get me a pet snake not just any snke but an Albino snake. I was so happy on Fri I believe. I was at work and Bryan came to try to talk to the guy he got interviewed by and was just hanging out there with me while I was getting karts. Then he left to do something so I didnt even really notice then he came back and he brought SNEAKY!!!!!!!!!( Jeremy) I was like yea!!!!!!!! I was so happy to see him I havent since I graduated and was always like where is he and all. So he got my number so we can finally hang out and do shit and whatnot. Austin called and started to talk to my mom yesterday when I was at work and he was like(kinda screaming) How come Cliff is ignoring Nicole online and the phone?!?! My mom told me that and I was like BULLSHIT!!!! That is so fucking false I havent even seen her online for like 3 weeks. And she hasnt even called here since Austin left because by the way if you guys dont know she is so fucking obessed with him. Anyway Austin called back and I was like Austin what the hell! She calls you just to complain about us anymore if thats the case tell her not to come over anymore(like we want her in the first place) I told him I havent seen her online for like 2 weeks and she hasnt called since u left so tell her to fucking stop telling lies because frankly I got sick of it a long time ago. Lately I have been getting out of the type of heavy music and getting in more of like th "Grunge" type of music but I still enjoy some heavy metal music but not as many as I used to. I also found one of my favorite books 2 days ago when I opened a drawer I havent opened in awhile. It is the book "Sabriel" I love that book I have no idea why I just like reading it. Yea! I can finally watch the entire wrestling show tonight and not just part of it. I so want Jeff Hardy back to the WWE. I want the Undertaker to switch over to RAW and then Undertaker win the WWE title and Jeff the IC title then them team up and win the WWE tag team titles. I know thatll never happen but I can dream cant I?!? It is wierd Ive been talking to Ellie more than I did before and I have no idea why beats me dont know its outta sight outta mind as they say. But whos not outta my mind is Niki I weant her here and no one else around us for the rest of our lifes. Hopefully tomorrow me and Bryan can hang out for a little bit befor eI have to work for 7 days straight. I also want to get some more flannel and some more jeans and shit.
I love you Niki very much!!! Luv everyone else also byez now!