Grasping at Shadows [4/5] (Suikoden II, Jowy and the Highlanders)

[puella_nerdii]

Shorter chapter this time, and then there's just one left to go. Am I actually going to finish a solo longfic for once in my fannish life? Yes. Yes I am.

And someone needs to shake Jowy and tell him if once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. Seriously.

Title: Grasping at Shadows [4/5] (AO3)
Author:

Comments

[puella_nerdii]

SHE REALLY IS. Lord, it's so hard to write intentionally vague dialogue, I swear.

I think Leknaat and Jillia were trying to say very much the same thing to him (and Riou will, too, at the very very end), that there's more to taking responsibility than self-flagellation, that while the ways in which he's willing to accuse himself and punish himself speak well of his moral sense, they don't actually gratify anyone or anything beyond his own feeling that he ought to be punished.
This is me doing another happy dance, because yes, god, that is precisely his problem. He knows he's dishonoring himself, he knows he's doing awful things, and he keeps doing them. I mean, a lot of why I love him is because of the horrible decisions he makes, but writing this fic is pretty much a constant stream of "Jowy, Jowy no, Jowy stop making decisions you are not allowed to make decisions."

I actually do think I'm going to continue with Jowy to the end of the game! There's a lot of interesting stuff that happens with him after Luca's death, after all. I probably need to tell that part of the story in a slightly different format, though. This story is such a step-by-step retelling of II, but we see a lot more of Jowy after he becomes king and I don't want half the fic to be a recap of the game. But I am not remotely tired of writing him yet, and lord knows I'm writing more Suikoden. Mith and I are working on the first installment of the band AU now, actually! And we're planning something that makes the scope of this fic look like nothing...

[lindenleaves]

Oh, I'm so glad you're writing more Jowy! Some of his most interesting decisions happen after Luca's death (including most of the ones that make me give him a hard time, so maybe you'll be able to cast him in a better light). And the band AU is still happening, too! So much good stuff on the horizon. :)