31 Texts From last Night Day 26 (1/2)test_kard_girlJanuary 27 2013, 20:32:18 UTC
(859): I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
"Finn! Finn, what the hell are you doing?" Kurt hollars, staring dumbstruck as he watches his step-brother-- and New Directions suspiciously missing leading man-- flailing contentedly around on the rooftop. He's lying on his back, staring at the fluffy white summer clouds like he's never seen them before.
"Oh god, this is AWESOME!!! How've I never been, where is, why am I up here...?"
"Why is he up here??" Kurt repeats shrilly, swinging his head round and glaring at Puck, who's just stooped down to pick a packet of what Kurt's pretty sure is Ketamine off the tarry asphalt. Taped to the front of the box is a note on official Carmel High headed paper.
"...'Sorry you missed the competition. love, VA'..." Puck reads, scrunching up the paper in annoyance. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Kurt presses a finger to the headache pulsing between his eyes. It all makes agaonizing sense: "He probably wasn't meant to wake up so soon." He muses. "They dosed his coffee. I knew those free drinks were suspicious...Someone should've reminded Jesse St Numb-nuts Finn has the body-fat density of a reindeer."
"WOW, this is... INCRAZY!!" Finn shouts gleefully, having rolled over and now hanging his face over the edge of the rooftop.
"He's making up words now." Puck realises flatly. "Making up words. It's like someone gassed him at the dentist."
"As long as he doesn't start singing Britney Spears, we're probabl--WOAH FINN!!!"
Kurt darts forwards, grabbing Finn's ankle as the other boy tries to yank himself over the very edge of the rooftop. It's only Puck grabbing the other one that stops him throwing both of them to multiple-fracture-ville.
"Oh god, you guuuys..." Finn whines sulkily, and Kurt grits his teeth and digs his nails in harder.
"How the hell can we get him down?" He hisses, glowering at his boyfriend's face across three inches of asphalt.
Puck makes a face: "...Don't suppose you got any super-sneaky ninja skills you can bust out right about now?"
"I was hoping for useful suggestions Noah!"
Finn struggles harder, like a marine under a cargo-net, and the other two boys hang on for dear life.
"Shame Jesse didn't leave any of that Ketamine in the packet, we could knock him out again."
"Then what?" Kurt snaps "Slide him head-first down the fire-escape??"
"Not like he would feel it..." Puck's voice trails off, and Kurt blinks at that familiar look of schemey confidence that trickles over his features.
"What?" Kurt hisses. But Puck just lifts an eyebrow:
Re: 31 Texts From last Night Day 26 (2/2)test_kard_girlJanuary 27 2013, 20:32:38 UTC
Kurt's mouth gapes for a moment; but Puck just lifts his head and hollars in the direction of their tranquelized friend.
"Hey! Finnessa!"
Finn stops struggling, going rigid like a startled deer.
"I had sex with your girlfriend."
What?
"What?" Kurt spits, before he can stop himself.
"...Wha??" Finn sounds like he didn't understand all the words.
"Yeah. Rachel. Your girlfriend. Sexed her up all over the place while you were still getting your guilt-shit together."
Kurt presses his forehead briefly against Finn's ankle: "I don't believe this..."
"But...She's my...But you're not..."
"--Yeah, she's not that bad. Y'know, if you're not into boobs. The legs make up for it--"
"--You're making me ill." Kurt pronounces, but Puck ignores him 'cos Finn is trying to clamber back to his drunken feet.
"Rachel's my girl-frien'. She wouldn' cheat on me, not with you, you're datin' Kurt."
His drugged-up anger is weirdly intimidating. Kurt and Puck scramble backwards, getting out the way as flaily-Finn pulls himself straight again; takes a few jerky steps away from the edge of the rooftop. It's less Bambi and more Frankenstein's monster.
"Yeah." Puck acknowledges, holding up his hands and grinning that crowing-bastard grin he's so good at.
"I cheated on your brother, with your girlfriend. How fucked up is that?"
Puck takes a couple of steps backwards, leading Finn with eye-contact like baiting a gorilla. He looks close to hilarity, but Kurt is finding absolutely nothing funny about any of this.
"You, you what, did you????" Finn's tongue's too big for his mouth, but he looks furious.
Puck just smirks:
"You wanna know which one gives better head?"
That does it. Frankenstein-Finn swings for Puck's face, all fury and no coordination, and Puck uppercuts him smartly to the jaw and he collapses to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
For a long minute, the two boys stare at their unconscious baritone, breathing heavily, and realising their snazzy competition costumes are going to look mighty suspicious when they get up on stage later this afternoon.
Slowly, the ambient cheerfulness of summer-day birdsong and far-off Regional heats replaces the pounding heartbeat in Kurt's ears.
"...I still don't know how we're going to get him off the roof." He comments eventually, reflexively smoothing his bangs back into place.
Puck turns his head, glancing at his boyfriend, amused:
"Finn! Finn, what the hell are you doing?" Kurt hollars, staring dumbstruck as he watches his step-brother-- and New Directions suspiciously missing leading man-- flailing contentedly around on the rooftop. He's lying on his back, staring at the fluffy white summer clouds like he's never seen them before.
"Oh god, this is AWESOME!!! How've I never been, where is, why am I up here...?"
"Why is he up here??" Kurt repeats shrilly, swinging his head round and glaring at Puck, who's just stooped down to pick a packet of what Kurt's pretty sure is Ketamine off the tarry asphalt. Taped to the front of the box is a note on official Carmel High headed paper.
"...'Sorry you missed the competition. love, VA'..." Puck reads, scrunching up the paper in annoyance. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Kurt presses a finger to the headache pulsing between his eyes. It all makes agaonizing sense:
"He probably wasn't meant to wake up so soon." He muses. "They dosed his coffee. I knew those free drinks were suspicious...Someone should've reminded Jesse St Numb-nuts Finn has the body-fat density of a reindeer."
"WOW, this is... INCRAZY!!" Finn shouts gleefully, having rolled over and now hanging his face over the edge of the rooftop.
"He's making up words now." Puck realises flatly. "Making up words. It's like someone gassed him at the dentist."
"As long as he doesn't start singing Britney Spears, we're probabl--WOAH FINN!!!"
Kurt darts forwards, grabbing Finn's ankle as the other boy tries to yank himself over the very edge of the rooftop. It's only Puck grabbing the other one that stops him throwing both of them to multiple-fracture-ville.
"Oh god, you guuuys..." Finn whines sulkily, and Kurt grits his teeth and digs his nails in harder.
"How the hell can we get him down?" He hisses, glowering at his boyfriend's face across three inches of asphalt.
Puck makes a face: "...Don't suppose you got any super-sneaky ninja skills you can bust out right about now?"
"I was hoping for useful suggestions Noah!"
Finn struggles harder, like a marine under a cargo-net, and the other two boys hang on for dear life.
"Shame Jesse didn't leave any of that Ketamine in the packet, we could knock him out again."
"Then what?" Kurt snaps "Slide him head-first down the fire-escape??"
"Not like he would feel it..." Puck's voice trails off, and Kurt blinks at that familiar look of schemey confidence that trickles over his features.
"What?" Kurt hisses. But Puck just lifts an eyebrow:
"Don't worry; I got this."
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Kurt's mouth gapes for a moment; but Puck just lifts his head and hollars in the direction of their tranquelized friend.
"Hey! Finnessa!"
Finn stops struggling, going rigid like a startled deer.
"I had sex with your girlfriend."
What?
"What?" Kurt spits, before he can stop himself.
"...Wha??" Finn sounds like he didn't understand all the words.
"Yeah. Rachel. Your girlfriend. Sexed her up all over the place while you were still getting your guilt-shit together."
Kurt presses his forehead briefly against Finn's ankle: "I don't believe this..."
"But...She's my...But you're not..."
"--Yeah, she's not that bad. Y'know, if you're not into boobs. The legs make up for it--"
"--You're making me ill." Kurt pronounces, but Puck ignores him 'cos Finn is trying to clamber back to his drunken feet.
"Rachel's my girl-frien'. She wouldn' cheat on me, not with you, you're datin' Kurt."
His drugged-up anger is weirdly intimidating. Kurt and Puck scramble backwards, getting out the way as flaily-Finn pulls himself straight again; takes a few jerky steps away from the edge of the rooftop. It's less Bambi and more Frankenstein's monster.
"Yeah." Puck acknowledges, holding up his hands and grinning that crowing-bastard grin he's so good at.
"I cheated on your brother, with your girlfriend. How fucked up is that?"
Puck takes a couple of steps backwards, leading Finn with eye-contact like baiting a gorilla. He looks close to hilarity, but Kurt is finding absolutely nothing funny about any of this.
"You, you what, did you????" Finn's tongue's too big for his mouth, but he looks furious.
Puck just smirks:
"You wanna know which one gives better head?"
That does it. Frankenstein-Finn swings for Puck's face, all fury and no coordination, and Puck uppercuts him smartly to the jaw and he collapses to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
For a long minute, the two boys stare at their unconscious baritone, breathing heavily, and realising their snazzy competition costumes are going to look mighty suspicious when they get up on stage later this afternoon.
Slowly, the ambient cheerfulness of summer-day birdsong and far-off Regional heats replaces the pounding heartbeat in Kurt's ears.
"...I still don't know how we're going to get him off the roof." He comments eventually, reflexively smoothing his bangs back into place.
Puck turns his head, glancing at his boyfriend, amused:
"You know it's you, right?"
"Of course it's me."
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Not sure an unconscious Finn is going to be easier to move than a drugged one though.
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