When You're the Best of Friends, 16/?
Title: When You’re the Best of Friends
Chapter Title: Best Years of Our Lives
Author: xLessxThanx3x
Rating: PG-13
Character(s)/Pairing(s): Kurt Hummel, Noah Puckerman, Burt Hummel, Azimio, Karofsky, New Directions, mentions of Carole Hudson Current Pairings: Barole
Genre: angst, filler
Warnings: AU, bullying scene
Spoilers: Nothing past "Britney/Brittany"
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee nor the lovely song "Best Years of Our Lives"
Author Notes: Part of a series
Summary: AU. Puck and Kurt hold hands, cuddle, know each other’s biggest secrets, and make the other a priority…but they’re not dating, they’ve just been best friends for years. Multi-chapter. Eventual Puckurt. Based off a Puckurt meme prompt.
(Chapter Summary: What happened during those summer months and when the boys went back to school.)
Word Count: 5,000+
It always seemed like the world wanted to make Kurt into a cold person. First he was made fun of by all of his classmates for every year he was in school. Then his mom, the light of his life, died suddenly and painfully from ovarian cancer. Then he had to deal with being gay and very obviously so in a less than accepting atmosphere. But the world had never planned on him having Noah Puckerman in his life.
Puck was like him, a boy who was hurt by people from a young age, a boy who had difficulties letting people see who he really was, someone who had anger underneath a mask of apathy. But he was also different enough for Kurt to complement him. Whereas Kurt loved to play with dolls and his tea set, Puck played superheroes and videogames. Kurt was always challenged in his relationship with Noah, he always had to be on his toes since Puck knew him, Puck was him, but Puck was also someone he would never be. That's how they worked, two peas in a pod but peas of different shape, color, and texture, like some experiment of Mendel's gone wrong.
But now he was alone in his pod. The world had caught up with him and realized that his life wasn't sucking enough so they had to take his best friend.
So, fine, he wasn't closed off enough to the world, he wasn't cold enough or unhappy or angry enough? Fine. He would just close himself off in his not half-empty pod and not trust anyone anymore. He was tired of fighting the world.
-
Birthday
"Happy birthday!" came the chorus of Kurt's friends as he opened the door in the morning.
He looked completely shocked, "How did you guys know it was my birthday? I didn't tell anyone."
"Facebook, duh," Mercedes said, leading everyone into Kurt's house. "So I thought I'd get everyone we could together to celebrate at lunch since I'm sure your dad has some dinner planned."
"Yeah, every year," Kurt said looking around at the Gleeks Mercedes managed to get to come to his house during summer, an anxious look on his face he seemed to have now whenever people did something nice to him.
"I still can't believe you're actually the oldest kid in Glee club," Tina teased, "Seeing as you only started looking like a teenager a few months ago."
Kurt gave her a half-smile for that, "What can I say; I age well."
"Yeah, well, you'll be everyone's best friend in college when you're 21 before they are," Artie pointed out as they went to the living room. Kurt sat down across from Artie and was suddenly reminded of the only other time Artie was in his house, how he was there to try to get Kurt to forgive Puck. He swallowed a lump in his throat and tried to smile for his guests.
"True," Kurt said, bending his legs by his chest, a physical barrier between him and the world.
"Hey, I think I hear a birthday boy!"
Kurt rolled his eyes but still smiled, "Good morning, Dad."
Burt walked into the living room, waving at Kurt's friends as he went over to his son. Making him stand up, he hugged him tightly. Kurt finally smiled for real, hugging his dad back.
When he was finally released from the hug, Kurt sat back down. "So, dinner at Chez Pierre tonight?"
"Of course, you know how your birthday dinner works," Burt said. "The only difference is that Carole and Finn will be there." But both of them knew the other big difference; Noah wasn't going to be there.
Kurt smiled weakly and brought his legs back to his chest, "So, let me see these presents then."
-
Puck was restless throughout the whole day. He did all his chores and even some or Sara's, he cleaned his room, he mowed the lawn, he even rearranged the family DVD collection. If anyone asked, he'd say it was before he was just bored from being out of school. But Mae wasn't fooled; in fact, she asked him why he ended up joining her and Sara for dinner.
Today was Kurt's birthday after all.
Merely shrugging, Puck ate the rest of his meal in silence. When he tried to rush through cleaning the dishes, his Ma sent Sara out of the room and cornered him. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing, Ma," Puck said defensively, drying off the last dish.
"Yeah, and I'm a devout Catholic," Mae said, rolling her eyes. "What's wrong with you and Kurt?"
Puck bristled at the mention. "None of your business, Ma. Sometimes people just grow apart." Not bothering with putting the dishes away, he stormed out of the kitchen and went to his room. He immediately pulled out his phone and texted Santana to see if she'd be up for a booty call and some booze; he needed to forget what day it was.
-
Father's Day
Puck always hated Father's Day.
Well, actually, that wasn't true. He used to like it. When he was younger it meant that he got to leave the house so his dad could rest all day, his Father's Day wish every year, and so Puck got to play at the arcade and then run around with Kurt. Then after his dad left, he spent Father's Day with the Hummel's.
It was the first Father's Day the Hummel's would be spending without Kate. Kate always made the day special for Burt despite it being a holiday few showed much respect for. She'd cook his favorite meals and not nag him about cholesterol, she'd get him presents, she'd let him have movie marathons, and, after Puck got older, Puck realized that getting him to help fix the shower was just a clever ruse to get them away from Kurt and Puck for an hour or so. He never told Kurt that, just letting Kurt believe that the shower just broke easily.
So the Hummel's were feeling quite a loss that Father's Day as well. But Mae made latkes, her specialty, while Kurt and Puck watched a John Wayne marathon, Burt's request, intently. And Burt focused on Sara, the little toddler with nothing to do. He played games with her, read with her, and even let her sit on his lap during dinner. With that the two broken families created a new tradition together.
Burt always had a watchful eye for Sara after that. He'd always scoop her up in his arms when he saw her and she started calling him Papa Burt, which he never discouraged unlike when Noah called him that (having the guy you assumed would be your future son-in-law call you that seemed weird to Burt, but Sara was just so cute when she did it; Noah assumed he just wasn't worthy of using the title of "dad" on him).
So Puck used to like Father's Day with the smell of latkes in the air and the action movies blaring on the television as Sara played with Burt like Kurt used to play with him. But this one was completely different.
No calls were made to plan out which house it would be at; Noah assumed the Hummel's would be spending it with the Hudson's anyways. Just another way that Kurt could upgrade his life and move on while Puck stayed behind. Puck told his mom he was going to the arcade but he ended up standing in front of the 7/11 until someone took enough pity on him to buy him some drinks so when he got home he could sit in his room get drunk.
Sara and Mae still had latkes but besides that, they didn't do anything they wouldn't do on any other day. But, secretly, they had sent out a card a few days earlier with words of gratitude for Burt. Sara gave him the project she had made at school before it ended for summer, a silly little poem and her school picture on a doorknob hanger. Mae added a message about how she hoped their sons would work out whatever was wrong soon (their "lover's quarrel", as she put it).
-
Kurt set the heart healthy breakfast for an egg white and spinach omelet (and, okay, a bit of cheese to be nice), freshly squeezed orange juice, and whole-wheat toast in front of his dad, smiling. "Happy Father's Day, Dad," he said, clapping him on the shoulder. "I have your favorite John Wayne movies, True Grit and The Quiet Man, ready to go when you finish, and we'll have dinner with Carole and Finn at six o'clock at Breadstix."
"Sounds great, kiddo," Burt said, and he really meant it. It was nice seeing his son genuinely happy these days. He started eating his omelet when Kurt bolted back up.
"Oh, forgot to bring in the mail yesterday, sorry! I'll go get that and the newspapers," he said, putting on a pair of flip-flops so his bare feet didn't have to touch the scorching pavement. Burt nodded, laughing to himself at Kurt's pants; he obviously needed to buy some since he was having yet another growth spurt.
A few minutes later, Kurt came in his face pained as he held a brown enveloped along with the newspaper. "Kurt?" Burt asked, feeling weary. Kurt merely put the envelope in front of Burt, the return address label reading The Puckermans.
Burt looked up uneasily at Kurt. Kurt just crossed his arms and said, "Open it. It's for you." Burt wanted to tell him no, but the stony look on Kurt's face stopped him cold. He sighed and opened the envelope to find a gift from Sara and a small envelope reading To Burt in Mae's scrawl.
Kurt swallowed the lump in his throat, his face tight. He had hoped against all hope that maybe, just maybe, he would have actually sent something, that maybe it would somehow fix everything. "Come get me when you want to watch the movies; I'll be in my room, Dad," Kurt said softly, turning around and ignoring Burt's call of his name, "Happy Father's Day."
Throughout the rest of the day Kurt was quiet and distant once again, barely saying anything as he pushed the meatball from his spaghetti all over his plate with his fork. He didn't even take the bait when Burt complimented the pair of earrings Carole was wearing that he knew Kurt had helped her choose. Eventually he tried to at least smile for his dad, but it was so fake and insincere Burt would've preferred the cold expression Kurt seemed to have permanently etched on his face.
-
The rest of the summer went very similar for the two boys. Kurt forced himself to meet up with Mercedes or Tina or whoever whenever they texted. He bought some more pants, got a new haircut, tried to be a whole new person after his growth spurt, ready to enter the first day of school without his best friend-well, his real best friend, since Mercedes tried to fill the role as best as she could, but she was no Noah.
What Kurt didn't know was that Noah wasn't really Noah anymore. He had fully accepted his assumed fate as Puck, the Lima Loser who was a big enough sleaze ball to knock up his friend's girl and then ditch her (what people thought he did), the guy who would never leave Lima in his wildest dreams. Puck sexed up whomever he could find and worked out whenever he wasn't sleeping or getting drunk or watching Sara, his muscles even more pronounced. He was ready to enter school by himself, just like he deserved to be.
-
Back at School
Puck was totally nailing the Jacob Ben Israel interview. He got to talk about his vasectomy (so the girls knew he could fuck them condom free) and he got to talk about working out and making money (so the girls knew he had money and even more killer guns), so, basically, he got to talk about how awesome he was. Then the little dweeb had to throw him off.
"What is your response to the rumors that you spent the summer heart broken because you and your former best friend, Kurt Hummel, stopped talking because of a mistake you made?"
Puck froze, his heart pounding. How the fuck did he even know about that? He looked at the camera, then Jacob, then back at the camera so he could push it away. "No comment."
-
Kurt had been slushied quite a many times. He had been slushied by every flavor the cafeteria had to offer in all major wings of the school in various different outfits by various people, one of them even being himself. The slushies were why he always had a spare outfit in his locker, because even having the resident badass as your best frien didn't leave you immune from them. But never in his life had he been slushied in such a public, humiliating way: right in front of the camera after giving a great speech about bravery and honesty.
"Welcome back to school, freak!" Azimio laughed, trading a high five with Karofsky as Kurt struggled to wipe the slushie away. And, of course, Jacob refused to edit that part out. So Kurt had no choice but to set his jaw and bare it and change into his spare outfit. He had to get used to it anyways now that Noah was out of the picture.
-
Puck sat down in the corner of the chairs in the choir room, hoping to avoid sitting next to anyone. Not that anyone would want to sit next to him after the Kurt thing, but he might as well avoid it.
Slowly other kids started trickling in; Santana and Brittany, Finn and Rachel, Quinn (who at least had the decency to sit far away from him and avoid eye contact), Mike and Tina (well, that was a surprise), a glaring Artie, and Mercedes. The last person to arrive was, somehow, magically, Kurt.
Puck felt his stomach drop in dread while his heart leapt, still instinctively happy to see his best friend, or ex-best friend. He looked great; he was taller, more graceful, elegant, regal. But the cold shield he had up at school seemed at least ten times as thick, so thick Puck could swear he felt a chill in the air. He shrunk in his seat, looking at the door in hopes that Mr. Schue would get there soon.
Kurt studied Puck out of the corner of his eye. He was glad to see that he had decided to keep the Mohawk off. Puck looked even more muscular, more like an adult than ever. His brain was full of conflicting emotions of wanting to run over and hug him, run over and slap him and berate him, or just ignore him. But Mr. Schue came in before Kurt could ponder it further, ready to lead the kids in a recruiting gig.
-
Puck slid up in front of Quinn. "'Sup, MILF," he said, referencing the words he had used on her when he found out she was pregnant.
Quinn tensed her jaw, "What do you want, Puck?" She stuck her hip out in attitude, her Cheerios skirt showing off a delicious amount of leg.
"I was just thinking that you're the Head Cheerio again and I'm still the resident Bad Ass. Since we already have a history that made something pretty fucking perfect, maybe we can do this again," Puck said, gesturing between the two of them.
Quinn shook her head, "This year is about me, Puck. I'm finally focusing on me and what I really want."
Puck looked at her in disbelief, "Oh, so last year wasn't about you at all?"
"I mean about me trying to get to know me," Quinn snapped. She sighed, "Look, I'm not dating people this year. And I know you're only asking me about this because of…her. And, well, because of him."
"Who?" Puck asked, not following who the him was for a moment. "Wait, you mean Kurt?" The name sounded and felt foreign on his tongue after not uttering it for so long.
"Yes, Kurt, the guy who's supposed to be your best friend," Quinn said, her eyes narrowing at Puck's tone. "I don't know what the hell happened with you two-no one does because Kurt won't talk about it and you disappeared off the face of the planet for the past two months-but you need to work this out and fast." She turned around and started walking down the hall in the opposite direction before turning back and walking back to him. "You know, you two were just a great inspiration for what real, unconditional love was. I'm really sorry to see that gone." That time she really did stalk off.
Puck didn't understand why she thought it was simple. He had fucked it over by saying what he did to Kurt and Kurt didn't deserve to forgive him, even if Kurt had fucked up things first. He didn't deserve to be forgiven. He didn't deserve to have anyone in life. He only deserved to be alone, like he was now, like Quinn basically confirmed by walking away.
He punched the locker next to him and stalked off, eyes stinging at tears he was so not going to shed.
-
"Wait, so where's Kurt?" Artie asked Finn. Mike and Puck were already there and Sam was standing in front of them awkwardly, waiting to start.
Finn blanched, "Oh…I was just thinking he'd show up with Puck. I was so used to that." Artie nodded sadly and they both told Sam he could start talking about himself.
"Dude, your mouth is huge," Puck said after Sam shared some basic information about himself, "How many tennis balls can you fit in there?"
Artie face palmed as Sam answered. He just had to get more proof of Puck totally not being straight after he and Kurt stopped talking to one another, didn't he?
-
Kurt never realized how truly good he had it bullying wise. People stayed away from him more often than not because they were afraid of Puck beating their ass. Of course every now and then he got slushied or locker checked or thrown in a dumpster, but nothing major.
Not anymore.
It didn't take long for the school to realize that he and Puck weren't friends anymore, and soon after that he was being attacked as if they were making up for lost time. Dumpster tosses seemed to be a fad that was over for good, but slushies were, evidently, never going out of style; he couldn't count all the bruises he had received from being slammed into lockers; and the names he was called were enough to make him feel sick to his stomach (and made him think their moms needed to wash their mouths out with soup).
But he didn't tell anyone. None of it happened in front of people and it wasn't like he couldn't handle it. If his dad knew he'd freak out and Principal Figgins wouldn't be able to change anything, Mercedes would try to make sure he was followed everywhere, and Puck…Puck wouldn't care.
So he dealt with it all silently. Some would say he was just being a martyr, but he just knew he had no other choice. Some would say his growing bouts of yelling in anger at school were a result of the bullying and his frustration with Puck, but he would just tell those people to shut the fuck up and mind their own damn business.
-
It was kind of worrying how much Kurt was holding onto this need to do Britney at the assembly. No one really knew what it was about, but Puck sort of assumed it was because of him, Kurt's way of getting back at him.
Puck had no problem with Britney, he really didn't. She was smokin' when she wasn't, you know, bat shit insane and shaving her head and stuff, and her music was catchy as fuck. But he couldn't help but think of when Britney first came about on the scene.
Kurt was obsessed with her back then, playing "Baby One More Time" and "(You Drive Me) Crazy" so much he wore out the CD. He learned some of her easier dance moves and when Oops!...I Did It Again came out, Puck had to learn the dialogue for the title song and "Lucky" so he could reenact it with him. For years, Puck was dragged into Kurt's obsession.
Then in 2002, everything changed. A little Canadian girl said fuck it to the normal Britney and Christina sound and wrote an album called Let Go. As soon as Puck heard the first song from it and saw her in her ties and camouflage pants in her first video, he was in love. Kurt was suddenly thrown into something Puck was obsessed with, constantly singing the not very punk but not very pop songs of Puck's favorite artist. Avril Lavigne had been a part of Puck's life ever since.
So the two friends both had their pop idols. They switched out listening to them and would gush about them, but never said a bad word against the other. Then eight-year-old Puck made some statement about Avril being so great because she didn't sound so unoriginal like her musical peers, she wrote a completely different sound. He mentioned Britney in his list of pop wannabees and Kurt was livid.
It was the first time they ever fought.
So he could only see Kurt's insistence on Britney as an attack on his musical choices. He couldn't tell if it really was or if the little smirks he saw on Kurt's lips were his own imagination or not.
But it didn't matter what Kurt thought. Kurt wasn't his friend anymore. Puck didn't have friends. He was fine just by himself.
Puck knew he didn't deserve other people, but he still let himself have Avril Lavigne.
But, of course, this wasn't something he admitted to anyone. People thought she was a poser because of her more pop-sounding album (oh how Kurt talked his ear off about that one sounding like Britney whether Puck liked it or not), that she wasn't cool, and he honestly didn't understand why. She was a total badass, refusing to let anyone tell her how to change her sound, ready to flip off paparazzi for getting to close, an she was even mature enough to stay close friends with her ex-husband. And when Tim Burton made a new version of Alice in Wonderland, she just flat out asked if she could write a song for it, and how many women just went out and took what they wanted? She was cool.
So when he spent nights alone, a lot of times he'd listen to her angstier music to get through not having Kurt anymore, skipping over The Best Damn Thing to blast Under My Skin and Let Go (he was so excited to know that her next album was coming out spring of the next year).
After Kurt's first insistence of Britney, Puck cruised through iTunes and found a new single of hers he had never listened to before. It was technically just a song featuring her, but it was written and performed by her best friend, Evan Taubenfeld, a song called "Best Years of Our Lives". He didn't even question buying it.
The beginning was so haunting, the melody was captivating, and Avril sounded absolutely amazing on it. But it took several listens for Puck to finally catch all the lyrics.
"It's been so quiet since you've gone," Avril sang after Evan sang a few lines, "And everyday feels more like a year. Sometimes I wish I could move on; the memories would all just disappear."
"So many things I would've said when I had the chance," Evan sang.
"So many times we took it all for granted," they sang together before going into the chorus. "I never thought this would ever end, never thought I'd lose my best friend. Everything is different now; can we stop the world from turning? I never thought I'd have to let you go, never thought I'd ever feel this low. I wish I could go back and we'd stop the world from turning."
"Looking back on better days," Evan sang as it went back to a verse
"When we were young and thought we knew so much," Avril finished.
Then they sang together, "Now it seems so far away, I'm wondering if I was good enough…"
As the song kept playing on repeat, Puck felt his heart twist. Yet again, Avril had written a song that was just meant for him.
In less than a day it became his top played song on iTunes.
-
"Hey, Hummel, nice skirt."
Kurt rolled his eyes and looked up at Azimio. "Thanks, Azimio, but it's a kilt specifically made for the male body, designed by one Alexander McQueen." He turned away from him; he could just take another way to Glee club.
"Doesn't look like a kilt to me," Karofsky sneered, blocking Kurt's path, "Looks like a fucking skirt. So you're a girl now officially?"
"Shut up," Kurt said, backing up right into Azimio again.
"Aw, the bitch is barking already," Azimio jeered, grabbing Kurt's arm.
"Let me go," Kurt said as calmly as possible.
"No please?"
Kurt looked at Karofsky like he was nuts, "You've got to be kidding me."
"Looks like the homo's not gonna be polite about it," Azimio said, twisting Kurt's arm a bit. Not enough to do damage but enough for Kurt to yelp in pain.
"Please let me go," he said desperately, shame immediately coursing through his body at actually begging for it.
"Don't ever wear that again, homo," Azimio said in a growl. He let go of Kurt's arm with a push, Kurt colliding into Karofsky softly. He scrambled out from between them, their laughs echoing in the hallway.
That interaction was all he could think of the rest of the day. Every stare and whisper when people say his outfit of choice-which he had worn before for crying out loud!-seemed ten times louder. It used to be that reactions like that would just make him roll his eyes and stand up straighter. Now he felt shame and guilt at every movement. It was hard to even walk at a normal pace.
When he finally got to Glee club, he had had enough. He had enough of people bullying him, he had enough of taking everything silently, and he definitely had enough of Mr. Schuester telling him no without even listening to his idea.
"Mr. Shue, you're letting your own personal issues get in the way of something that we are all telling you we really want to do," Kurt said as calmly as he could manage given his state. "I mean, this club regularly pays tribute to pop culture, and Britney Spears is pop culture; to suggest otherwise is heretical!"
"Kurt, I'm done talking with you about this."
"Geez! Let loose a little, would you! Stop being so frickin' uptight all the time!" Kurt practically screamed. He sat back, tense as what he had said hit the group. They all seemed to find it funny, and he couldn't believe he was being laughed at again.
"Kurt…I'll see you in the principal's office," Mr. Schue said.
Kurt stood up and felt the kilt whishing around his lower thighs. With his head held high, he walked out of the choir room and to Principal Figgins' office.
Mr. Schuester sighed, "I'll be back, in a couple of minutes, guys."
As soon as the teacher left, everyone turned to each other. "Oh my God, Kurt telling off Mr. Schue might've just made my life," Rachel said.
"I know, right?" Tina said. "It's about time someone did."
As the kids continued to chatter, Puck watched the door. Why was Kurt doing that? The only times Puck could remember him full out lashing out at someone, sarcastic and catty comments aside, was when he was upset about something else and he took it out on other people. He kind of wanted it to be because of him, that he actually was important enough for that, because then Kurt missed would was missing Puck as much as Puck missed him, but that didn't make sense because he hadn't acted like this until the past few weeks.
But for whatever reason it was, he really didn't appreciate how everyone was acting like it was a great, inspiring moment. Something was wrong and they were all too dumb to see it. "Wow," he finally said darkly, "You guys suck real bad." He grabbed his bag and stuffed his ear buds in, playing "Best Years of Our Lives" as he left the school.
A few moments after Puck left, Artie said, "So no one knows what happened with those two, right?"
Mercedes sighed, "All I know is that during the last week of school Kurt was thrown in the dumpster and Puck just walked by him. Something must have happened right before it."
"So it was something to do with…you know," Tina said, looking at Quinn uncomfortably. Quinn tensed her jaw but nodded in agreement.
"And no one knows anything from Puck's side?"
"Well, are any of us really friends with him?" Mike asked, speaking up for once. When everyone looked at him (well, Artie glared), he explained, "I think of him as a friend because of football and Glee, but I never really talk to him or hang out with him outside of those two things. Finn definitely doesn't and I don't think anyone else does. Kurt at least has Mercedes and some of you girls. Puck really has been more of a loner except for Kurt, y'know?"
"Hey, I spent time with him this summer," Santana pointed out.
"Spending time with your legs in the air isn't really the type of time we're talking about," Quinn said with a smirk.
"Oh, screw you, you bi-"
"Stop the violence!" Brittany insisted again. Both girls glared at each other for a moment longer but then looked away, letting it drop.
"So, all we know is that-"
"Okay, guys, back to Christopher Cross," Mr. Schue said as he came jogging back in before the teens could say anything else on the issue at hand.
-
When Kurt got home that day (he was told if he spoke out like that again he could get suspended or expelled), he went on iTunes to check out some new music, needing something loud to make him forget about Britney and Glee club and stupid Karofsky and Azimio.
After some searching he managed to find a song by some guy he didn't know. "'Best Years of Our Lives'," Kurt read. With a shrug, he bought it with a leftover gift card from his birthday, not even looking at the words ft. Avril Lavigne.
By the end of the day, it was tied with "Bad Romance" for his top played iTunes song.