Eh Hem....
From: Harry [mailto:harrydreamware@sify.com]
Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2005 2:58 AM
To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Subject: Adv: Regarding your website Design www.XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.com
June 8, 2005
To
Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX
999 XXXXXXX XXX
XXXXXXX, XX
Dear Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX,
Congratulations on making a brilliant decision to go online with your domain name XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.com. I am writing this email specifically to you.
My company has won 5 prestigious Internet awards for designing outstanding web sites, and I thought I should share the following important information with you.
Broadly speaking, there are two types of websites, 1) Informative website and 2) Marketing Website. Most websites that are designed by people with limited web experience end up being 'informative' by nature, and are generally ineffective in making any positive, financial difference to the owner of the website. Most template and non custom-designed sites fall into this category.
In our professional opinion, an outstanding website is a 'marketing' site, and it works 24 hours/day, and generates notable revenues to the owner of the site. A good website should deliver the following with very few clicks: a) what the company does, b) the company's strengths c) what differentiates them from their competition, and d) any other powerful, unique features/solutions that they offer.
A 'thinking' site is a site that achieves all of the above objectives with 'No' clicks, instead of a few clicks. When we design websites for our customers, we create and dedicate a small portion of the viewing area to continuously do 'marketing' of our customer's products/services, and deliver powerful messages nicely. This way, the risk of a website viewer not getting our customer's message becomes negligible. Here is an example of a good thinking and marketing site that we did for one of our clients recently: http://www.myathletique.com
Quality: Also, please take a look at our impressive portfolio at http://www.dreamwareinc.net/ where you will see a number of examples.
Plans & Prices: We create outstanding Internet presence very economically. Please see our plans at http://www. dreamwareinc.net
Send an email to me at harry@dreamwareinc.net with your contact information and the best time to call, and I will call you.
Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX , I thank you very much for taking the time to read this important email. I sincerely appreciate it, and would love to have your association. I sincerely hope that I have not wasted your time. If you choose to not respond to this email, I will conclude that you are not interested in our services, and I assure you that you will not get another email from me. In that case, please accept my sincere and profuse apology for taking your time.
Looking forward to hearing from you!
Yours Truly,
Harry Wilson
http://www.dreamwareinc.net
Email: harry@dreamwareinc.net
Essence of compassion: Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant with the weak and wrong... because sometimes in our lives we will have been all of these.
Note: Unless you respond favorably, you will not receive any more emails from us. Guaranteed.
When Hell Freezes Over, 2005
To:
Mr. Asshat Spammer
of dreamwareinc.net
doesn't even use his own @domain for a return e-mail address.com
Dear Mr. Harry Wilson,
Congratulations on being stupid enough to spam a web development company with canned marketing spam for another web development company. There are two types of people in this world, 1) Those that create things and make things using their own talent and diligence and 2) those who pretend that they create things but really only act as middle-men and capitalize on the profound ignorance of others. Most of the people in category 2 could probably be eliminated from the face of the planet, and everyone else would be exponentially happier and more content.
In my professional opinion, you are a parasitic asshat. My recommendations are that you a) take your marketing and stick it where your head usually goes, b) stop spamming the administrative contact e-mail address of every random domain you find, c) promptly go back to dog grooming school, and d) figure out that making running lists for everything is not an effective marketing technique.
A "thinking" human being actually takes the time to do a little research before they cold-contact any potential client. If this doesn't "click" then I suspect that your intelligence quotient is negligible. How can you expect me to take your example of "good thinking" seriously when you aren't even aware of who you are contacting and you persist in utilizing incomplete sentences?
Quality: Exactly what quality are you trying to convey? If it's the quality of a bland cookie cutter "business" web site, then I'll have to concede that you are indeed successful.
Plans & Prices: Your chart is extremely vague and misleading. I'm glad to see that you get up off your couch every 5 to 7 days to call some high school student so they can cut and paste content into a WYSIWYG program. I'd call you, but I'm afraid that you'll still be in your underwear.
Mr. Harry Wilson, you'll have to forgive me for not really appreciating that you wasted my time with your spam email. At least, I derived a small amount of entertainment from it while I was composing this reply. I assure you that if I do get another e-mail from you, I'll send well over 2000 copies of this reply directly to your harrydreamware@sify.com email address and completely /. your web site. If this is the case, please accept my sincere condolences at the loss of your monthly bandwidth allowance, but don't expect me to apologize profusely.
Look forward to your own demise!
Psymonetta Isnoful, MSCEA
Agent Provocateur
New Bohemian Grove
What the fuck are you trying to say with that lame, randomly generated quote?
Note: I have 650+ domains registered at this email address. I assure you that your guarantee is meaningless.
Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2005 2:58 AM
To: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Subject: Adv: Regarding your website Design www.XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.com
June 8, 2005
To
Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX
999 XXXXXXX XXX
XXXXXXX, XX
Dear Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX,
Congratulations on making a brilliant decision to go online with your domain name XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.com. I am writing this email specifically to you.
My company has won 5 prestigious Internet awards for designing outstanding web sites, and I thought I should share the following important information with you.
Broadly speaking, there are two types of websites, 1) Informative website and 2) Marketing Website. Most websites that are designed by people with limited web experience end up being 'informative' by nature, and are generally ineffective in making any positive, financial difference to the owner of the website. Most template and non custom-designed sites fall into this category.
In our professional opinion, an outstanding website is a 'marketing' site, and it works 24 hours/day, and generates notable revenues to the owner of the site. A good website should deliver the following with very few clicks: a) what the company does, b) the company's strengths c) what differentiates them from their competition, and d) any other powerful, unique features/solutions that they offer.
A 'thinking' site is a site that achieves all of the above objectives with 'No' clicks, instead of a few clicks. When we design websites for our customers, we create and dedicate a small portion of the viewing area to continuously do 'marketing' of our customer's products/services, and deliver powerful messages nicely. This way, the risk of a website viewer not getting our customer's message becomes negligible. Here is an example of a good thinking and marketing site that we did for one of our clients recently: http://www.myathletique.com
Quality: Also, please take a look at our impressive portfolio at http://www.dreamwareinc.net/ where you will see a number of examples.
Plans & Prices: We create outstanding Internet presence very economically. Please see our plans at http://www. dreamwareinc.net
Send an email to me at harry@dreamwareinc.net with your contact information and the best time to call, and I will call you.
Mr. XXXXXXX XXXXXXX , I thank you very much for taking the time to read this important email. I sincerely appreciate it, and would love to have your association. I sincerely hope that I have not wasted your time. If you choose to not respond to this email, I will conclude that you are not interested in our services, and I assure you that you will not get another email from me. In that case, please accept my sincere and profuse apology for taking your time.
Looking forward to hearing from you!
Yours Truly,
Harry Wilson
http://www.dreamwareinc.net
Email: harry@dreamwareinc.net
Essence of compassion: Resolve to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant with the weak and wrong... because sometimes in our lives we will have been all of these.
Note: Unless you respond favorably, you will not receive any more emails from us. Guaranteed.
When Hell Freezes Over, 2005
To:
Mr. Asshat Spammer
of dreamwareinc.net
doesn't even use his own @domain for a return e-mail address.com
Dear Mr. Harry Wilson,
Congratulations on being stupid enough to spam a web development company with canned marketing spam for another web development company. There are two types of people in this world, 1) Those that create things and make things using their own talent and diligence and 2) those who pretend that they create things but really only act as middle-men and capitalize on the profound ignorance of others. Most of the people in category 2 could probably be eliminated from the face of the planet, and everyone else would be exponentially happier and more content.
In my professional opinion, you are a parasitic asshat. My recommendations are that you a) take your marketing and stick it where your head usually goes, b) stop spamming the administrative contact e-mail address of every random domain you find, c) promptly go back to dog grooming school, and d) figure out that making running lists for everything is not an effective marketing technique.
A "thinking" human being actually takes the time to do a little research before they cold-contact any potential client. If this doesn't "click" then I suspect that your intelligence quotient is negligible. How can you expect me to take your example of "good thinking" seriously when you aren't even aware of who you are contacting and you persist in utilizing incomplete sentences?
Quality: Exactly what quality are you trying to convey? If it's the quality of a bland cookie cutter "business" web site, then I'll have to concede that you are indeed successful.
Plans & Prices: Your chart is extremely vague and misleading. I'm glad to see that you get up off your couch every 5 to 7 days to call some high school student so they can cut and paste content into a WYSIWYG program. I'd call you, but I'm afraid that you'll still be in your underwear.
Mr. Harry Wilson, you'll have to forgive me for not really appreciating that you wasted my time with your spam email. At least, I derived a small amount of entertainment from it while I was composing this reply. I assure you that if I do get another e-mail from you, I'll send well over 2000 copies of this reply directly to your harrydreamware@sify.com email address and completely /. your web site. If this is the case, please accept my sincere condolences at the loss of your monthly bandwidth allowance, but don't expect me to apologize profusely.
Look forward to your own demise!
Psymonetta Isnoful, MSCEA
Agent Provocateur
New Bohemian Grove
What the fuck are you trying to say with that lame, randomly generated quote?
Note: I have 650+ domains registered at this email address. I assure you that your guarantee is meaningless.