Tears, smiles...never knowing what to show.
I really dont know anything. Im as ignorant as they say. Maybe im not tht grlfriend material... i dont know much about dating. i know more how to be a friend. My friend Jaime says i'm the coolest grl to be around, i'd be the best grlfriend to have... i only wish tht were true.
I think ever since tht whole thing about ur friends saying tht you care about ur bf more than ur friends... hurt me. b/c it was never true. ppl just dont get it.obviously if me and my bf are good, and one of my friends need me, then fuck i'll be there for them. But if my bf needs me, i'll be there for him.
Sometimes i had wished tht i didnt exist. I didnt ache. I wish tht i wasnt human. to feel no emotion. to not feel love. to not feel anything. so i could never ache.
I love him so much.
Old feelings returned. Tht old feeling i had when i was with tht other guy. The feeling tht anything i did wouldnt fix anything. a feeling of being worthless. it came back on saturday. i didnt know how to do anything. little did he know tht i was trying to scheme a way to make him smile. But nothing came to mind. i felt worthless. i felt like i didnt know him. when i know tht if any little cute thing i do, any little silly thing i could do would make him smile. cause he would know my effort to make him happy.
Then the way he spoke to me...made me feel like i wasnt what he needed, i wasnt what he was looking for. Again, my worthlessness showed. I felt like dying, cause i couldnt heal him, and i couldnt even heal myself, like i had to be strong for both of us, but i realized i couldnt, i realized im too weak for anything. My strong character fell apart b4 my eyes. And this morning...i couldnt do anything right, just cry like a little bitch and hide in a corner b/c its all i've been reduce to in my life, for as long as i could remember.
I dont know anymore. Yeah, its the downfall of my relationship. forget it. all i have is the power of prayer, and hope.
Just put on my smile for the world, and act like everything is alright.
Pretty grl is suffering
While he confesses everything...
Thts what you get for falling again
You could never get them out of your head...
Its the way tht he makes you feel,
The way tht he kisses you,
Its the way tht he makes you fall in love...
I think ever since tht whole thing about ur friends saying tht you care about ur bf more than ur friends... hurt me. b/c it was never true. ppl just dont get it.obviously if me and my bf are good, and one of my friends need me, then fuck i'll be there for them. But if my bf needs me, i'll be there for him.
Sometimes i had wished tht i didnt exist. I didnt ache. I wish tht i wasnt human. to feel no emotion. to not feel love. to not feel anything. so i could never ache.
I love him so much.
Old feelings returned. Tht old feeling i had when i was with tht other guy. The feeling tht anything i did wouldnt fix anything. a feeling of being worthless. it came back on saturday. i didnt know how to do anything. little did he know tht i was trying to scheme a way to make him smile. But nothing came to mind. i felt worthless. i felt like i didnt know him. when i know tht if any little cute thing i do, any little silly thing i could do would make him smile. cause he would know my effort to make him happy.
Then the way he spoke to me...made me feel like i wasnt what he needed, i wasnt what he was looking for. Again, my worthlessness showed. I felt like dying, cause i couldnt heal him, and i couldnt even heal myself, like i had to be strong for both of us, but i realized i couldnt, i realized im too weak for anything. My strong character fell apart b4 my eyes. And this morning...i couldnt do anything right, just cry like a little bitch and hide in a corner b/c its all i've been reduce to in my life, for as long as i could remember.
I dont know anymore. Yeah, its the downfall of my relationship. forget it. all i have is the power of prayer, and hope.
Just put on my smile for the world, and act like everything is alright.
Pretty grl is suffering
While he confesses everything...
Thts what you get for falling again
You could never get them out of your head...
Its the way tht he makes you feel,
The way tht he kisses you,
Its the way tht he makes you fall in love...