Dec 07, 2005 15:30
WHITE WOMEN:
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out a
bit.
Third date: You get to have sex but only in the
missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have
sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive
restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes
spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you &
insists on a 3-carat ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together &
hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a Mistress.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date: You get terrific head.
Second Date: You get even more great head.
Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head
again.
CHINESE WOMEN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but
nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive
dinner. Nothing happens again.
Third date: You don't even get to the third date and
you've already realized nothing is ever going to
happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive
dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her girlfriends a
real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She's pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk
on Tequila, and have sex in the back of her car.
Second Date: She's pregnant.
Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother,
father, his girlfriend, her two sisters, her brother,
all of their kids, her grandma, her father's
girlfriend's mother, her two cousins, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in and
you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life
in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like
a home along the Tijuana strip.
ARAB WOMEN:
First Date: Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters,
Cousins, Aunts, Uncles, Friends and entire Arab
community finds out.
Second Date: Guy is shot dead.
No third date.