Valentine's Craziness
I was going to wait and tell this story to Gina before she would read about it here, but I need to get this down. Too much is happening in my head and I want to make sure it's preserved for posterity... or me six months from now, reading back over this stuff. Anyhow, to elaborate:
Tonight, they had this thing for a pre-Valentine's Day Fundraiser, where you donate a dollar and then you make a little sign that says "To: Whomever, From: Whomever, Happy Valentine's Day" and you decorate it and tie it onto a bottle of Crush soda and it gets delivered on Valentine's Day. Really cheezy, really fun, all for a good cause. Well, Shea's liked this particular boy for a long time and he goes here too and lives in Middle Earth - I've met him, and they're good for each other even if I don't know what she sees in him - so between me and Rupal, we dragged her to the thing and got her to make a bottle for her crush. (She still claims she was forced, but the thing is in her handwriting, even if Rupal had to look up his room number and I had to front the dollar. She even wrote out a second one when decorating the first went awry.)
Anyhow, while we were there, I said, "Hey, I've got another dollar, so if it'll make you feel better, I'll send one to Kevin. Okay?"
She agreed and I paid the other dollar and got to work. Neither one of us signed our names, though we're (Rupal and I) pretty much going to make sure Shea's boy knows who it came from and mine was signed "Your suite-mate". There's a specimen of my handwriting on my door and I'm betting he's going to figure out it's me without much trouble. I've already pledged that, if he asks me about it, I'm going to be totally honest, though I'm also betting that he won't ask me about it. He can be pretty shy, as I've mentioned before. But at the least, it feels good knowing I've probably made his Valentine's Day. And that I've taken a step in a positive direction instead of pussyfooting back and letting things "happen" as they will, not even moving when it's clear a little nudge from me would have started something (SEE: Phillip, who I think was just waiting for a call from me to bring things to a head; Josh, who I was literally THISCLOSE to kissing at the NIN concert - oh what could have been!).
Kevin is not going to be a regret like that. I won't allow it. I feel like I'm in a good enough place where I can make a move, maybe he'll reciprocate my interest and maybe he won't, but I feel like I'm good enough as a person that he might be interested. And if he's not, well then, I'll know that and quit worrying about him and find me somewhere else to have some fun.
I'm feeling good about this. Nervous, but good.
I really want it to be tomorrow so that I can find out what happens next in this saga!
Tonight, they had this thing for a pre-Valentine's Day Fundraiser, where you donate a dollar and then you make a little sign that says "To: Whomever, From: Whomever, Happy Valentine's Day" and you decorate it and tie it onto a bottle of Crush soda and it gets delivered on Valentine's Day. Really cheezy, really fun, all for a good cause. Well, Shea's liked this particular boy for a long time and he goes here too and lives in Middle Earth - I've met him, and they're good for each other even if I don't know what she sees in him - so between me and Rupal, we dragged her to the thing and got her to make a bottle for her crush. (She still claims she was forced, but the thing is in her handwriting, even if Rupal had to look up his room number and I had to front the dollar. She even wrote out a second one when decorating the first went awry.)
Anyhow, while we were there, I said, "Hey, I've got another dollar, so if it'll make you feel better, I'll send one to Kevin. Okay?"
She agreed and I paid the other dollar and got to work. Neither one of us signed our names, though we're (Rupal and I) pretty much going to make sure Shea's boy knows who it came from and mine was signed "Your suite-mate". There's a specimen of my handwriting on my door and I'm betting he's going to figure out it's me without much trouble. I've already pledged that, if he asks me about it, I'm going to be totally honest, though I'm also betting that he won't ask me about it. He can be pretty shy, as I've mentioned before. But at the least, it feels good knowing I've probably made his Valentine's Day. And that I've taken a step in a positive direction instead of pussyfooting back and letting things "happen" as they will, not even moving when it's clear a little nudge from me would have started something (SEE: Phillip, who I think was just waiting for a call from me to bring things to a head; Josh, who I was literally THISCLOSE to kissing at the NIN concert - oh what could have been!).
Kevin is not going to be a regret like that. I won't allow it. I feel like I'm in a good enough place where I can make a move, maybe he'll reciprocate my interest and maybe he won't, but I feel like I'm good enough as a person that he might be interested. And if he's not, well then, I'll know that and quit worrying about him and find me somewhere else to have some fun.
I'm feeling good about this. Nervous, but good.
I really want it to be tomorrow so that I can find out what happens next in this saga!