i dono where to start
Life is what you make of it right? The glass is half full or is it half empty? I guess it depends on what day you ask, what time it is, and what the weather is like outside. I have come to relise that nothing is for certin. You think you have it figured out, then wam, it turns right back around to smack you in the face. At one point in my life I welcomed all the changes and never knowing what was around the next corner. But now I am sick of it. I want plans, I want dates, and I want a fucking time limit.
I have figured out that I can't go day by day. I need my shit planed out. I need to be orginzed. Atleast when it comes to my baby. I envy all of you who get to hold the one you love every night. I have been married now for a lil' over 5 months and hardly even seen my love. On top of all of it, he is going through shit that I can't be there to help him.
So I also have been trying to atleast say my last good byes to people as the time comes near for me to leave this fucking state. I feel like there is nothing here anymore. Everyone has moved on with their lives and didn't even look back to see if anyone needed help. For the past few months I really needed friends. Maybe needed is the wrong word. It would have been nice to have a sholder to cry on, someone to tell me it was gonna be ok (even if they had no idea it would be), just a friend who could try and understand. I didn't want anyone to try and fix my life, but just a resurance that someone was gonna be there when everything went to hell. But over the past few months I relised that I am not gonna have anyone to fall back onto. No one cares, when they have all of their shit to do and deal with.
I feel like I did my end though. So this goes out to everyone who knows me, I hope the glass will always be half full for you, and if it isn't fuck it maybe tomorrow will be a better day.
Trist you are always in my heart love.
I have figured out that I can't go day by day. I need my shit planed out. I need to be orginzed. Atleast when it comes to my baby. I envy all of you who get to hold the one you love every night. I have been married now for a lil' over 5 months and hardly even seen my love. On top of all of it, he is going through shit that I can't be there to help him.
So I also have been trying to atleast say my last good byes to people as the time comes near for me to leave this fucking state. I feel like there is nothing here anymore. Everyone has moved on with their lives and didn't even look back to see if anyone needed help. For the past few months I really needed friends. Maybe needed is the wrong word. It would have been nice to have a sholder to cry on, someone to tell me it was gonna be ok (even if they had no idea it would be), just a friend who could try and understand. I didn't want anyone to try and fix my life, but just a resurance that someone was gonna be there when everything went to hell. But over the past few months I relised that I am not gonna have anyone to fall back onto. No one cares, when they have all of their shit to do and deal with.
I feel like I did my end though. So this goes out to everyone who knows me, I hope the glass will always be half full for you, and if it isn't fuck it maybe tomorrow will be a better day.
Trist you are always in my heart love.