blah
so here i am in tn at my job ... my job is soooo boring.. but i love my house and the town... its great so far.. .things are crazy...
cassidy asked me to marry him at while ago and weve finally decided to start sharing that bit of info with our friends/family. im excited about it. i dont have a ring yet but im hoping he will save out of a paycheck and get me one.. but if he doesnt its no big deal.. im not really into material things that much... i love him, i love him like ive never loved anyone before... i really hope things work out... hes great to me... i may not be the best to him .. but i try .. i have lots of problems... i worry too much.. i hold things in.. i dont like to tell cassidy if im upset because of something hes done.. if im upset i just soak i up.. i look upset.. i act upset... but i wont share why i am.. i have to fix that... ive been trying to tell him more lately.... i did manage to tell him that it upset me when he wouldnt help me do something that i asked him to do for me... i dont think he actually understands that i feel like i do a lot of things for him and get only a few things back.. im not really complaining.. but it hurts to know that if he asked for something or asked me to do something i would do it.. and usually i would do it immediately because i love him and i want to make him happy... for example usually he will lie down and ask me to go get the stuff to doctor his spider bite... even though im lying down and he just came outta the bathroom where the stuff is usually i will get up and get it and take care of the spider bite... but if i were to ask him to do the same for me i dont think it would happen.... things will get better.. i mean really its not like its a huge thing... i just want some help with things sometime.... blahness... i havent been able to write what im thinking much lately so im just letting everything go now.. maybe if i do this later ill feel better and not have so much on my mind... i dont know how the house thing is going to end up... things are already getting weird... but oh well im not going to talk about that... all i can think about is getting married .. we havent really discussed when or where yet.. i dont know when.. i have no clue.. ima let him pick the date around his familys schedule.. but i know we should do it in ms or la.. that way we can be sure that all of our family can come... blahness.. i just called my momma.. i havent told her yet.. i dont really want to tell her lol.. ill tell her after she comes down in october... so much is changing... its craaaaaaaaazy
cassidy asked me to marry him at while ago and weve finally decided to start sharing that bit of info with our friends/family. im excited about it. i dont have a ring yet but im hoping he will save out of a paycheck and get me one.. but if he doesnt its no big deal.. im not really into material things that much... i love him, i love him like ive never loved anyone before... i really hope things work out... hes great to me... i may not be the best to him .. but i try .. i have lots of problems... i worry too much.. i hold things in.. i dont like to tell cassidy if im upset because of something hes done.. if im upset i just soak i up.. i look upset.. i act upset... but i wont share why i am.. i have to fix that... ive been trying to tell him more lately.... i did manage to tell him that it upset me when he wouldnt help me do something that i asked him to do for me... i dont think he actually understands that i feel like i do a lot of things for him and get only a few things back.. im not really complaining.. but it hurts to know that if he asked for something or asked me to do something i would do it.. and usually i would do it immediately because i love him and i want to make him happy... for example usually he will lie down and ask me to go get the stuff to doctor his spider bite... even though im lying down and he just came outta the bathroom where the stuff is usually i will get up and get it and take care of the spider bite... but if i were to ask him to do the same for me i dont think it would happen.... things will get better.. i mean really its not like its a huge thing... i just want some help with things sometime.... blahness... i havent been able to write what im thinking much lately so im just letting everything go now.. maybe if i do this later ill feel better and not have so much on my mind... i dont know how the house thing is going to end up... things are already getting weird... but oh well im not going to talk about that... all i can think about is getting married .. we havent really discussed when or where yet.. i dont know when.. i have no clue.. ima let him pick the date around his familys schedule.. but i know we should do it in ms or la.. that way we can be sure that all of our family can come... blahness.. i just called my momma.. i havent told her yet.. i dont really want to tell her lol.. ill tell her after she comes down in october... so much is changing... its craaaaaaaaazy