Does a broken heart ever mend?
I used to think yea it does.. but its been so long.. my heart hasn't healed yet.. I'm starting to think it never will. I only hope I could find someone as good as 'you' maybe I'll find someone better. I'll never know and I'm sure I wont know til its gone.. cuz thats the way my life seems to work. Life is getting harder and I'm slipping.. and I'm almost falling down and if I do.. I don't think I'll ever get up. When I think I'm numb to all the pain that I've been having/feeling, it turns around and punches me hard in the stomach making my eyes swell and tears stream off of my face. I wish I could just cry out all my bad things.. to someone.. have them be here for me.. to hold me and love me, But even if the opertunity came up I would hide my tears and not show my true feelings. Why!? I don't even know. I don't really care if someone sees me cry I just look horribly ugly so I'm not afraid of someone thinking I'm weak or something.. unless I'm crying over something really stupid and small, then I feel weak and stupid. Sometimes when I'm around someone and I'm sad and I want to cry to them.. I want to.. but I can't nothing will come out.. til I'm alone.. generally after they left or in the shower. People have said I'm an easy person to love.. if thats so true why can't I keep the ppl I love in my life?! What's so wrong with me!? I wish someone would come along and mend my stupid heart already, but then again.. so does a lot of ppl. **sigh** I wish I could say good bye to the memorys they hurt so bad I want them gone yet.. I'm afraid if they do dissapear what would happen to me, would I be the same person.. or would I be different. Would I have a heart of rock solid ice?! Sometimes I wish I did. Then maybe I wouldn't be so sensitive and hurt so easily and well love so easily. EHHH
*~*FuCk LoVe*~*
*~*FuCk LoVe*~*