Send in the clowns
This is for joss100
Title: Send in the clowns
Author: killerweasel
Rating: R
Character(s): Lindsey McDonald, Angel
Prompt: 078. Root of all Evil insane challenge
Word Count: 552
AU after Underneath
Send in the clowns
“Lindsey, do I even want to know what the hell that thing is?”
Angel had brought me up from my cell because no one on the current staff had a clue as to what had just appeared in the lobby. I was just happy to be free for a few minutes. That cell was a rather boring place to be. I turned my head and sucked in a breath. “Oh shit.”
His eyebrows went up. “What do you mean ‘oh shit’?”
“A lot of people don’t like clowns, right?” He nodded. “Ever wonder why?”
“Not really, no.”
I rubbed my temple. “Few hundred years ago, one of those guys over there showed up and the Senior Partners made them a deal. They could steal souls as long as they disguised themselves as something that would amuse children.”
“That thing is creepy.”
“That thing is a demon that’s older than you are. And you need to go over and talk to him before he starts sucking souls out of anyone who gets too close.”
Angel pushed me in front of him. “You go deal with it.”
“Oh fine. You’re a big baby, you know that?”
Plastering a smile on my face, I walked over to where the demon was. “They’re overdue on the tribute, right?”
He hissed something at me before glaring at Angel. I swallowed a few times. “Angel, did you tell his people that you weren’t providing souls any longer? He seems to be under the impression that you told him to fuck off.”
“I’ve never seen him before.”
The demon snarled, shifting shape into something that looked almost human. “How about now?”
“Oh.”
“What was the arrangement before he took over here?”
I actually took a step back as the demon launched into a rant, pacing back and forth. Every once in a while, he turned and muttered something at Angel before looking at me again. “Angel if you don’t fix this, he’s going to...” I frowned, wondering if I had the translation wrong. He repeated the last sentence and I tried not to laugh. “He’s going to send in the clowns.”
“We said we weren’t dealing with soul stealers any more, he’s out of luck.”
This was obviously not what the demon in front of me wanted to hear. The next thing I knew, I was flat on my back with his claws on my throat. Why the hell was he attacking me if Angel was the one being an ass? I whispered something in his language, which made him pause.
“Lindsey, are you okay?”
“Shut up for a minute.” Angel sputtered something. “Clowns are the root of all evil in this area, you jackass. You don’t piss them off.”
The demon grinned down at me, shifting back into its original form before vanishing in a cloud of smoke. “What did you say to him?”
I go to my feet and flipped Angel off. “I told him that there was a school of mimes three blocks from here. Mimes and clowns are sworn enemies.”
“So you just sent a bunch of demons to go kill some humans?”
“Mimes aren’t human because humans aren’t that disturbing. I’m talking rival clans here. With any luck, they’ll wipe one another out. Either way, the world will be just a little less evil.”
Title: Send in the clowns
Author: killerweasel
Rating: R
Character(s): Lindsey McDonald, Angel
Prompt: 078. Root of all Evil insane challenge
Word Count: 552
AU after Underneath
Send in the clowns
“Lindsey, do I even want to know what the hell that thing is?”
Angel had brought me up from my cell because no one on the current staff had a clue as to what had just appeared in the lobby. I was just happy to be free for a few minutes. That cell was a rather boring place to be. I turned my head and sucked in a breath. “Oh shit.”
His eyebrows went up. “What do you mean ‘oh shit’?”
“A lot of people don’t like clowns, right?” He nodded. “Ever wonder why?”
“Not really, no.”
I rubbed my temple. “Few hundred years ago, one of those guys over there showed up and the Senior Partners made them a deal. They could steal souls as long as they disguised themselves as something that would amuse children.”
“That thing is creepy.”
“That thing is a demon that’s older than you are. And you need to go over and talk to him before he starts sucking souls out of anyone who gets too close.”
Angel pushed me in front of him. “You go deal with it.”
“Oh fine. You’re a big baby, you know that?”
Plastering a smile on my face, I walked over to where the demon was. “They’re overdue on the tribute, right?”
He hissed something at me before glaring at Angel. I swallowed a few times. “Angel, did you tell his people that you weren’t providing souls any longer? He seems to be under the impression that you told him to fuck off.”
“I’ve never seen him before.”
The demon snarled, shifting shape into something that looked almost human. “How about now?”
“Oh.”
“What was the arrangement before he took over here?”
I actually took a step back as the demon launched into a rant, pacing back and forth. Every once in a while, he turned and muttered something at Angel before looking at me again. “Angel if you don’t fix this, he’s going to...” I frowned, wondering if I had the translation wrong. He repeated the last sentence and I tried not to laugh. “He’s going to send in the clowns.”
“We said we weren’t dealing with soul stealers any more, he’s out of luck.”
This was obviously not what the demon in front of me wanted to hear. The next thing I knew, I was flat on my back with his claws on my throat. Why the hell was he attacking me if Angel was the one being an ass? I whispered something in his language, which made him pause.
“Lindsey, are you okay?”
“Shut up for a minute.” Angel sputtered something. “Clowns are the root of all evil in this area, you jackass. You don’t piss them off.”
The demon grinned down at me, shifting back into its original form before vanishing in a cloud of smoke. “What did you say to him?”
I go to my feet and flipped Angel off. “I told him that there was a school of mimes three blocks from here. Mimes and clowns are sworn enemies.”
“So you just sent a bunch of demons to go kill some humans?”
“Mimes aren’t human because humans aren’t that disturbing. I’m talking rival clans here. With any luck, they’ll wipe one another out. Either way, the world will be just a little less evil.”