the tangled web.
Estrous strikes again. Isn't that a sexy word? I didn't think so, either. My last Human Sexuality paper was on women going into heat. Anyway, it definitely happens...
I hadn't seen this guy in a month. Let's call him C. Not including one brief interlude with N, where my heart really lies, I hadn't been to see Mr. Nice Guy (C) since Halloween. It took a moment to get used to, but as encounters go, it was absolutely perfect.
I was aching for affection, and he gave it to me in spades. First we cuddled in front of the TV until I finally managed to maneuver him to the bedroom. Two roommates were still watching TV so I didn't want to be too conspicuous, but I was starting to not care anymore. I stripped down and he pushed me against the wall and did amazing things to my breasts. (He said later he would remember that incident for a long time.) Then he went down on me (which he's VERY good at) until I wanted to overpower him and rape him. He teased me a little while with his cock before fetching a condom and slowly pushing it in. I couldn't get enough of him, though trying to whisper, begging him loudly to fuck me as fast as he could, and he obliged eagerly while making those sexy noises he makes. It's usually difficult to make him come, but he said he had a hard time not blowing his wad when I was on top of him. Since that's when I came, I should've told him to do it then.
He said he forgot how fantastic I was at giving head. I always find that kind of flattering, especially since he's very large.
Then he told me he was in love with me. I was strangely not taken aback. He has been acting like he's been thinking about me, but I figured it was a poly-courtesy kind of thing. "I'm thinking of you... and I'm thinking of you, and you too." I was a little concerned about not giving him enough time. Anyway, it felt good to have someone say that. He's in love with at least one other person, so since his feelings are distributed elsewhere I'm not too worried about his feeling hurt. I would go ballroom dancing with him.
N is probably gonna move his stuff out of my house over the next couple of days. I've loved having him. Unfortunately his self-hatred has been causing him to resent me, somehow. I don't take it personally, but it still hurts a bit. I'm still rather in love with him, but realistic about it. I know I don't need him. But he is an incredible, beautiful person. And I can't make him happy.
I hadn't seen this guy in a month. Let's call him C. Not including one brief interlude with N, where my heart really lies, I hadn't been to see Mr. Nice Guy (C) since Halloween. It took a moment to get used to, but as encounters go, it was absolutely perfect.
I was aching for affection, and he gave it to me in spades. First we cuddled in front of the TV until I finally managed to maneuver him to the bedroom. Two roommates were still watching TV so I didn't want to be too conspicuous, but I was starting to not care anymore. I stripped down and he pushed me against the wall and did amazing things to my breasts. (He said later he would remember that incident for a long time.) Then he went down on me (which he's VERY good at) until I wanted to overpower him and rape him. He teased me a little while with his cock before fetching a condom and slowly pushing it in. I couldn't get enough of him, though trying to whisper, begging him loudly to fuck me as fast as he could, and he obliged eagerly while making those sexy noises he makes. It's usually difficult to make him come, but he said he had a hard time not blowing his wad when I was on top of him. Since that's when I came, I should've told him to do it then.
He said he forgot how fantastic I was at giving head. I always find that kind of flattering, especially since he's very large.
Then he told me he was in love with me. I was strangely not taken aback. He has been acting like he's been thinking about me, but I figured it was a poly-courtesy kind of thing. "I'm thinking of you... and I'm thinking of you, and you too." I was a little concerned about not giving him enough time. Anyway, it felt good to have someone say that. He's in love with at least one other person, so since his feelings are distributed elsewhere I'm not too worried about his feeling hurt. I would go ballroom dancing with him.
N is probably gonna move his stuff out of my house over the next couple of days. I've loved having him. Unfortunately his self-hatred has been causing him to resent me, somehow. I don't take it personally, but it still hurts a bit. I'm still rather in love with him, but realistic about it. I know I don't need him. But he is an incredible, beautiful person. And I can't make him happy.