Burlington Coat Factory - Part 2
"How'd everything fit?" was what Joe asked as I exited the fitting room. "Uh good, good" I choked out. I did my best to slink away though the jungle of expensive suits but he shadowed me, blocking my escape. He smiled and asked me if I was looking for anything else today, but I lied and said No, hoping to disappear before he noticed the sweat stains surrounding my armpits. Before I could get my legs moving, he says "Hey, can I ask you a question?" This is it. Hes going to ask me out. I'm about to have the most awkward conversation of my young life. I could feel the blood start to creep up my neck toward my cheeks, the sweat starting to pour out from every gland. All moisture evaporating from my mouth as my mind raced, trying to find an acceptable way out of this situation, but coming up with nothing. My brain had failed me. "Where did you buy those jeans? They look great on you" he asked.
Just then, a woman's voice broke through on the intercom, requesting Joe's assistance at customer service. "I, uh, th-think they're from American Eagle...." I said. I remember the words sounds far away as I said them, almost like an echo. "Oh! My daughter loves that place! I'll be back hun, I've got to help the help!" Shocked, and probably hyperventilating, I turned and quickly zigzag my way through the department behind the fitting room. I still needed to buy a sports coat, but finding a suitable place to hide was more important. I found a cozy spot in the far corner of the store between winter coats and strange looking tween outfits. I took a knee, pretending to look at something on the bottom shelf, trying to calm myself down. "What is wrong with me?" I thought. "Why am I hiding in the little girl section of a department store? What am I going to do?" Run, tell him off, or play along. What am I going to do...
After a few minutes I nonchalantly got up, looked around and headed in the direction of the sports coats. Arriving there, the selection of coats in my price range was underwhelming. Like before, every few minutes I would look around and make sure I was alone and again, thankfully I was. I was doing my best to try on jackets as quickly as possible, but also trying to find one that fit well so I would never have to come back to this store again. "Hey, Andrew! ANDREW!" someone yelled from a few racks over. Confused, I turn to find Joe calling for me. "Uh...me?" was all I could manage. "Well, you look like an Andrew. And you never introduced yourself to me. So do you have a name, or do you want me to call you Andrew?" I smiled and introduced myself because, I must admit, that is a pretty good pick up line to start a conversation with. "So you're not done shopping yet I see Brandon" he started, still smiling. Trying to stay calm, I answered "I guess I forgot that I needed a sports coat too. Does this fit me?".
The loudspeaker boomed again, requesting Joe to customer service once more. Before leaving, his reply was "Yeah, you look hot." I could feel the blood starting to rush back into my face but Joe had already turned and started walking toward the registers, so I hoped he hadn't noticed. Looking back at the mirrors, my face was cherry red and my hair was wet with sweat. In a moment of vainness, I thought I must be pretty attractive to still be getting hit on while I look like I was trying not to shit my pants. I put the coat back on the hanger, which also had a pair of pants included for free. The pants were too big, so I ditched them in the rack of coats and made my way for the register. I thought I was almost free. I just needed to pay and I could escape this strange hell. But today was just not my day.
To be continued....
Just then, a woman's voice broke through on the intercom, requesting Joe's assistance at customer service. "I, uh, th-think they're from American Eagle...." I said. I remember the words sounds far away as I said them, almost like an echo. "Oh! My daughter loves that place! I'll be back hun, I've got to help the help!" Shocked, and probably hyperventilating, I turned and quickly zigzag my way through the department behind the fitting room. I still needed to buy a sports coat, but finding a suitable place to hide was more important. I found a cozy spot in the far corner of the store between winter coats and strange looking tween outfits. I took a knee, pretending to look at something on the bottom shelf, trying to calm myself down. "What is wrong with me?" I thought. "Why am I hiding in the little girl section of a department store? What am I going to do?" Run, tell him off, or play along. What am I going to do...
After a few minutes I nonchalantly got up, looked around and headed in the direction of the sports coats. Arriving there, the selection of coats in my price range was underwhelming. Like before, every few minutes I would look around and make sure I was alone and again, thankfully I was. I was doing my best to try on jackets as quickly as possible, but also trying to find one that fit well so I would never have to come back to this store again. "Hey, Andrew! ANDREW!" someone yelled from a few racks over. Confused, I turn to find Joe calling for me. "Uh...me?" was all I could manage. "Well, you look like an Andrew. And you never introduced yourself to me. So do you have a name, or do you want me to call you Andrew?" I smiled and introduced myself because, I must admit, that is a pretty good pick up line to start a conversation with. "So you're not done shopping yet I see Brandon" he started, still smiling. Trying to stay calm, I answered "I guess I forgot that I needed a sports coat too. Does this fit me?".
The loudspeaker boomed again, requesting Joe to customer service once more. Before leaving, his reply was "Yeah, you look hot." I could feel the blood starting to rush back into my face but Joe had already turned and started walking toward the registers, so I hoped he hadn't noticed. Looking back at the mirrors, my face was cherry red and my hair was wet with sweat. In a moment of vainness, I thought I must be pretty attractive to still be getting hit on while I look like I was trying not to shit my pants. I put the coat back on the hanger, which also had a pair of pants included for free. The pants were too big, so I ditched them in the rack of coats and made my way for the register. I thought I was almost free. I just needed to pay and I could escape this strange hell. But today was just not my day.
To be continued....