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[NEWS] 181202 #Junsu;

Kim Junsu, tears at concert after military discharge "Unable to go on broadcast for 9 years, even had the thought to stop being a singer" https://t.co/f0s91GYzZi pic.twitter.com/VYETiI6CKk
- 돖. (@shinkipeia) December 3, 2018



"When I release song, even if it is one or two times, I want to sing on the broadcast stage. I am not hoping for the 1st place. That was all but that was also very difficult. It was so suffocating that suddenly I was tearing."
- 돖. (@shinkipeia) December 3, 2018

Click to view

some points he mentioned, in case you don't watch the full vid:

• he thought it would be impossible for him to perform at the Jamsil Indoor Stadium again (which is where he held his last concerts before enlistment ~2 years ago; capacity 11~12k)
• he finds it surprising that he has teenage fans especially because it's been about 9 years since he's been able to have exposure (via broadcasts/television) aside from the EBS Space Empathy program and the articles written by journalists/news
• he doesn't feel like he's a celebrity because he doesn't get to go on broadcasts and wonders if he should even be called a celebrity
• it's not a level playing field since he doesn't get to go on broadcasts and promote properly, but he's okay with it since it's a path he chose
• even though they won the lawsuits and all, he didn't expect that he wouldn't be able to go on tv for this long
• when he was watching tv in the barracks with his fellow soldiers, he saw some actress and comedian appear on a variety show who had been on a blacklist for some 10 years or so and because of administration change were able to come on tv again, and he wanted to cheer them on
• he realized that a lot of people/general public think either (a) he doesn't go on tv because he doesn't want to (not true - he would like to be able to go on shows) or (b) assume he has been appearing on tv; so they don't know that he's not able to go on broadcasts
• what he wants is just to be able to sing his song at least once or twice on TV to properly promote his new albums/songs, he's not asking to appear on variety shows to tell his story (although that'd be nice) or even get 1st place
• thinking about all this, for the first time in his life, his self esteem hit rock bottom and he thought about quitting being a singer, around jan/feb of this year, because it was making things hard for his fans
• "You guys can let go of being a fan when it wears you down. Really. When work and life catches up on you, and it's exhausting, isn't it? And so it's okay. As long as enjoy today and cherish each moment as it comes...that's all we need to do."
• it's painful for him to see his fans fighting so hard for him, so he wants to tell them that it's not needed, it's okay as long as they enjoy each moment together - it doesn't matter if the number becomes smaller, he'll always try his best and work hard to have more fun/enjoyable moments with the fans, all they need to do is enjoy themselves and they can communicate through music and concerts

A comment by Sergeant Kim Kyungryul (who was the sergeant on the team Junsu was in during his enlistment) on the video linked above:






sources: withxiahcom (youtube), @shinkipeia ( 1, 2), newsen, @xianonymity ( 1, 2) - they subbed the vid + comment

i really wanted to share this because it was really heartbreaking to read/watch about this, i hope it's ok mods! ;; it's something we already know, but for him to openly address it like this and open up about his recent struggles, it was really hard to watch :( i'm glad he's continuing on though! on a bright note, in his latest vlive, jaejoong mentioned that he's filming for some show (not online one like photo people) and he's been spotted with comedian lee jinho and fti's jonghoon, so i'm hoping it's able to be broadcasted and it means things are somewhat looking up!!