If you're reading this, LJ is back up...
Some more t-shirts for your summer clothing needs! I figured that since America's sci-fi TV landscape currently lacks much of a space program, a joint effort with the UK was needed to get things rolling again. And the great thing is, once it's up and running, we can go back and get the whole plan started several decades earlier! The other one is pretty self-explanatory for those of a Minecraft mindset. Just when you just about get things the way you want them and your building project is coming together, some killjoy shows up and wipes out your hard work. That whole thing with Lando Calrissian and the Millennium Falcon was just a cover-up, after all. The Empire ragequit afterwards and closed down their server, claiming they were going off to play "The Old Republic" instead, but we know the real reason they left, don't we?
Anyway, Steven Spielberg seems about to set Jurassic Park 4 into motion. Uncle Steven is a fairly solid deliverer of goods where movies are concerned, mostly. He does hate to end on a downer, it seems, but that's where I think the JP franchise should go. From what I understand, he left a line off of the end of "Minority Report," after we learn the pre-crime system had been dismantled, telling us that murders had started again, and several were unsolved. Like the "Alien" franchise, the JP movies took a look at the next logical step in the story and blinked: "Alien 3" should have been the Xenomorphs making it to Earth. Jurassic Park 2 should have been Dino-pocalypse, and there should have been no defeating of velociraptors via gymnastics. I think there needs to be a major dino-incursion, because that would set up a new plot dynamic, it could be seen as a metaphor for [insert disease or social ill here], and it allows the writers (and audience) to ignore everything but the first movie. Adding some of the spooky concepts from the original JP book that hinted the 'raptors had more going on in their skulls than "who's for lunch" would be welcome, too. Besides, it would allow for JP5 to be more along the lines of another nostalgic property with some great toy potential.
I think I've just found the reason that most of my friends who melt at a British accent will be going to see "The Hobbit." Benedict Cumberbatch (star of the BBC's "Sherlock") will be the voice of Smaug. That should make for an interesting conversation in the wyrm's lair between him and Martin Freeman (Bilbo/Watson). This will, naturally, lead to many geek-offs over the merits of Smaug vs. Draco from "Dragonheart."
More hackery from the land of video game companies. Bioware was the target, and the hackers took what probably falls into the category of artifact/relic: data from a decade-old Neverwinter Nights forum. I'm guessing someone, somewhere really wanted an embarrassing post about THAC0 or elven mating rituals taken down and revenge to be sought on those who mocked it. Even if it isn't, that'd be a great rumor to start, which is keeping with the spirit of D&D tavern rumor tables, don't you think? They also took down some other site that probably makes video games, too, or something.
Here's something that might make you look askance at your next console-related purchase. Certain games might make you more susceptible to buying antique furniture. As a fan of "Fallout" and player of "Bioshock, two of the most subversive games in this area, I'm outraged that I'm being so... manipulated. Here I was, trying to hold back my barely-contained desires to go shoot myself full of mutagens, grab some power armor, and go out on a murderous rampage for bottle caps in an undersea complex that I was totally unprepared to resist the siren song of fine woods, retro vinyl, and time-worn brass. I just have to face up to the fact that our media is in the pocket of "Big Antiques" and they won't be satisfied until laws demand us all to have something from over fifty years ago is in every home. :)
Hmmm. That previous item might explain why I have three office chairs with me that predate my own birth by several decades. Naugahyde seems to last pretty well, if nothing else. Here's a few things I hope don't come off as smelling of an old barn full of antiques and uninvited livestock:
- A new Simon's Cat cartoon. What more needs to be said?
- JK Rowling taunts the internet with a site called "Pottermore." Pottermore? I didn't even touch her in the first place! (rim shot)
- The actual headline for this story was five sentences into the article: In a tunnel 86m long, they unearthed what is believed to be the largest deposit of human excrement ever found in the Roman world.
- In the alternate universe where we got HBO's "Game of Thrones" but our video game tech hadn't progressed past the 8-bit stage, the music from the console game might sound a little something like this.
- Here's something that might never have occurred to anyone traveling by TARDIS: sex with people from the future could be hazardous to your health. Well, for brine shrimp, anyway. And if that reminds you of a reverse-plot from an episode of "Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends," you're not alone.
- I think this might be the best Muppet movie parody trailer yet. I still miss the original voices, though. Also, I'd love a Swedish Chef movie.
- Sure, not being able to blow up everything in one go may seem like a buzzkill, but Kaboomz 2 still involves a cannon, so that's got to count as a point in its favor.
- Like something out of the dystopian world of Max Headroom comes a DirecTV channel where you stare at a rotating hamburger, clicking an arrow on your remote when prompted to get a free BK Whopper. And if you asked "what's Max Headroom?" you can shut up and watch the food spin.
- Sticking with faux frogs, if you're so inclined, you could own a Thor Frog bust. Yes, I have that comic somewhere, too...
- Learn to Fly 2 is a launch/upgrade game sequel with a difference: You not only have to fly far but destroy obstacles as well in a quest to get revenge on an iceberg.
- In this next link, scroll down past Pyramid Head to see Buzz Lightyear by way of "Starcraft" and Woody as if he'd just come from "The Dark Tower."
- If you really want to impress people with your secret society's lair, you need a globe made up of 10,000 OLEDs.
- This looks like a collection of door locks from Castle Heterodyne, along with one from the 18th Century version of The Umbrella Corporation.
- Scriptsource is a site devoted to the various modes of writing in a plethora of languages from all across the globe, and is kind of cool to browse.
- DJ Lobsterdust has some interesting mashup MP3s for download, including a Jefferson Airplane/Fatboy Slim one that's pretty catchy.
- Some lost footage from "Star Wars" has been released, demonstrating that it's never as easy to knock people out as you might think.
- Galactic conquest has never been so relaxing to watch as in Solarmax. Increase your fleet population, conquer planets, move your new armies on to enemy worlds. All to a "Music From The Hearts of Space" ambient soundtrack.