Jan 19, 2005 22:47
ugh bad day.
everyother day this week has been awesome.
well today was too.
until like 8 oclock
hrjfgh4klre
ive pretty much decided i need to leave my softball team..
first time ive been that upset since riot
lemme explain the whooole story
and theres gunan be profanity so if you get offended easily..dont read. im using it to show how much im upset/sad/torn/pissed.
okay so a few weeks ago i was asked to go to mammoth with my two best friends.
of course i checked my scheduale and said yes.
becuase i was free.
but then the rain came
and washed my softball try-outs out.
and they rescheduled them for THIS SUNDAY.
and i will be in mammoth THIS SUNDAY.
and my parents read the flyer and thought it was last sunday.
so we didnt think there was a problem.
until we read the flyer agaian.
so tonight my mom called my coach to see if it was okay,
and he said 'well i wish i could go to mammoth this weekend.."
and then conituned saying 'well ill leave it up to you guys [my parents] for what you want brooke to do"...[which is way unfair to my parents..all they wanted is to see if it would affect my outcome of making the team becuase i already playd a whole seaosn for them]
and then he said."..you know i honestly think freddy might say 'well we already have her uniform...'"
which BASiCALLY means
we dont need anything form her except her uniform
so that makes me feel great
i spent a year of my life literally WORKING MY BUTT OFF FOR YOU?
and all that means to you is she has our fuckin jersey?
in my opininon thats sooo messed
when im on a team i give 46798% and then some
and to do that
and think evertythings okay
to hearing you are and were worthless to us..
uh THANKS coach THANKS.
dont get me wrong...i love the girls on that team so much
its bonding liek always
and the coached are probably the best coaches ive ever had.
and and and
this sucks
but i think ive decided to quit this team..
i mean someday im gunna look back on this and maybe not even remember it?
but will i rmember the weekend i spent with my bets friends?
you better believe it.
and this is gunna so sound ridiculous.
but ive cried over this decision.
you hear me?
CRIED.
i dont cry very often.
and im bawling over this.
shows you how much they mean to me huh?
but i dont wanna look back on life and see all the would,coulda,shoulda's that held me back
just becuase softball was #1
i dont know,
please help me people.
what should i do?