FFS scheduled for Nov 9th... (cross posted to partners_of_tg)

[prtyldy]

I could type about this for days, but I want to keep this short. I am a cisgender female with a trans woman partner. She was out when we first met, but did not start transitioning until we had been together for 6 months. Fast forward 2 years: last week we booked for FFS with Dr Spiegel in Boston. She is pretty much getting the works

Comments

[outofsynch]

zoe and i were talking about old photos of her the other day. I've been taking pictures as the months go on so she can see how her face and body are changing because of the harmones. she brought up that she had some really old photos I'd be shocked to see, and we started talking about high school yearbook photos and how she thinks those would be hard for her to look at on her own, much less with someone else (maybe me, maybe). She feels like a different person than she felt back then. those pictures feel like a different life to her, even though she maintains that she's always been true to her inner self no matter what it looks like from the outside.
I think it's ok to have a lot of conflicting and confusing emotions. This whole thing is one crazy journey for both of you. I think about the beginning of my relationship with zoe, her insecurities, her appearance, and it feels like a world away from the person and the body that's here now. I have no idea what it's going to be like when she goes in for SRS. I'm scared, and worried. and i try to remind myself to breathe and take one day at a time. it might help you to do that too.
a support group is useful, people you can talk to about how you feel and what you see, that you feel safe discussing A. with. I think you probably just need to be able to communicate with yourself about how you feel and a group of people is a good way to do that.
you can talk to me if you want (I'd love to have more people to talk to who are dating people like our girls, and some of the stuff I just forget to write about), and there's these lj outlets that appear to be pretty helpful.

[prtyldy]

=) It helps me so much talking to everyone on here. I don't know why I have neglected livejournal so much lately. I think I have just been withdrawing from everyone lately, trying to be as strong as I know Anna needs me to be...

[outofsynch]

well, then stop punishing yourself like that. you can't be strong if you don't take care of yourself. :) it's easy to withdraw and then to feel like you have no one to turn to. but really, all you need to do is reach out to those support networks and someone will be there, even if you've been m.i.a. for a while.