Strangers in Red, by cmar and germankitty, Jason/Tommy, Wes/Eric, Jason/Eric
Title: Strangers in Red
Chapter: Closed Doors
Authors: cmar and germankitty
Relationships: Jason/Tommy, Wes/Eric, Jason/Eric
Rating: R
Warning: Strong sexuality, language
"So - we headed back to the car, to drive to Jason's room."
It was almost as if he could smell the ocean again on that beach in San Diego, hear the faint background murmur of waves on the sand and the closer sound of those unwelcome voices, and feel the cool breeze over the heat of kisses and a heady rush of lust that had driven out all other thought, as Eric let his voice trail off. But all it took was a glance at Wes's profile beside him, gazing up at the ceiling expressionlessly, to bring him crashing back to his bedroom in Silver Hills.
"Hey, I'm sorry," he said after a moment.
"For what?" Wes asked.
"You didn't need to hear that." Eric propped his head on one hand, watching Wes's face, and hesitantly touched his partner's shoulder. Maybe it would have been better to refuse to say anything, even the edited version he had just finished telling Wes of that hot, dark night on the beach. But - he knew from experience that sometimes imagination would create scenes worse than the reality.
"It's okay. I asked for it, after all." Wes shifted his eyes to Eric's, and tried to smile. He had known from the beginning of their romantic relationship what Eric had been like years ago, but this was the first time it had really sunk in - that the man he loved had spent years going to gay bars, picking up guys, and having sex with them in alleys, in bathrooms, in dark corners, wherever - and on beaches, apparently. Did it bother him? Yes, he had to admit that, at least to himself. Did it matter? Not as long as Eric wasn't doing it now.
"It was a long time ago. Things were different then. I did things I wouldn't do now," Eric said, almost seeming to echo his thoughts. "But that was the last time. I was already changing, even if I didn't know it yet, and that night was part of it."
"Yeah?" Wes reached up to take the hand Eric had left on his shoulder, and smiled. "So tell me the rest."
"The rest. Well, like I said, we decided to go to Jason's dorm room."
"Yeah ... Was what you told him the real reason you didn't want to go to your hotel - because of a noisy neighbor?"
"No," Eric said. "I didn't want to bring him where he might find out my last name, and I didn't want to have to deal with him maybe wanting to sleep there. I ..." He gave a little snort of laughter. "I didn't want to bring a stranger to my room."
"What's funny?"
"It's just sorta - ironic, I guess, the way it turned out."
"So tell me what happened."
"Are you sure...?"
"Yes, I'm sure. Go on."
"We left the beach, and I drove him back to his college. To his dorm ..."
---
"Take a left here. It's the building on the right. Yeah, park anywhere."
"Okay." Following Jason's instructions, Eric pulled into a small parking lot beside a rambling three-story building that loomed out of the darkness before them. He took a better look as he reached to turn off the ignition and noted that only a few of the windows were lit. "You sure it's okay for me to go in?" he asked.
"Why should anyone stop you?" Jason flashed him a quick grin in the dim light as he opened his door. "You're my guest. Besides, you look like a student."
"Thanks, I guess," Eric muttered. True, he wasn't much older than Jason and most of the other students here, although he felt as if a gulf much larger than a few years loomed between himself and them. Getting out and locking the door, he looked up again at the brick walls, half expecting them to be covered with ivy. "So this is what a college dorm looks like."
"Haven't you ever been on a campus before?"
"No. I lived in a dorm for a while in a prep school. Not college."
"Yeah? Where was that?"
"A little town north of here. You wouldn't know it." Eric shook off the reminder of Wes and started for the walkway at the side of the lot. "Well, are we going in or what?"
"Yeah, we're going." Jason caught up with him, pointed, and then led the way to a side door almost hidden by a clump of bushes. He fished in his pocket for a key ring and unlocked it, went in and held the door for Eric. "We can take the stairs," he said.
A minute later Jason was unlocking another door, one of a line along each side of a hotel-like hallway. He pushed it open, stuck his head in, then flipped on the light and looked back out at Eric. "Okay, the coast is clear," he said. "Come on in."
Inside, Eric glanced over two twin-size beds, one on each side of the room; two small dressers, and two desks with various books strewn over them and on two shelves set on the walls above. It looked like exactly what it was; a room designed to house two people in reasonable comfort in as little space as possible. Another door opening off the short entranceway revealed a small but apparently private bathroom.
"So - what do you think?" Jason asked.
Eric shrugged. "A lot like the prep school dorm. Quieter, though."
"A lot of the guys go home on weekends." Jason paused, watching him. "You didn't go to college at all?"
Eric looked up sharply. "No. Something wrong with that?"
Jason shrugged and smiled. "Of course not. You just seem like a smart guy to me. I was wondering why not."
Eric snorted faintly. "Why? No money is why. That's why I enlisted - I like eating and having a roof over my head."
"But you said you went to a prep school. Don't those cost money?"
"Scholarship. Got taken away."
"Oh. That's too bad. And - I guess your family couldn't afford college?"
"My 'family' was long gone by then," Eric said shortly, in a tone he hoped would discourage more questions.
Apparently it worked. "Sorry to hear that," was all Jason said.
But now he had a pitying look on his face that Eric decided he didn't like. "I've done okay for myself," he muttered.
"Obviously."
Eric crossed the room to where Jason was leaning on one of the desks and stepped in close, shifting his weight to press his lower body against the other man's. All this talking - Jason's curiosity was just another sign that he hadn't done this kind of thing before. Eric had been willing to be considerate of his inexperience so far, but that went only up to a point - a point they had just reached. "Did you bring me here to get my life story or are we going to do what we came to do?" he growled. Without waiting for an answer he reached a hand up and curled his fingers around the back of that strong, thick neck, bringing them together into a harshly demanding kiss, thrusting his tongue into Jason's mouth as soon as it opened for him, feeling teeth grazing lips with bruising force.
Jason responded, his arms closing around Eric's body and squeezing powerfully. The guy was strong, excitingly strong. Eric ran his hands over broad shoulders and down, bringing one between them. Jason shuddered as Eric explored his growing hardness, rubbed for a moment, withdrew long enough to grind their bodies together so Jason could feel him too, and then fumbled with the zipper.
Then Jason was reaching down too, his hands pulling at Eric's belt, loosening it. They struggled with each other's clothing to the tune of their own rapid breathing. Finally Eric got the zipper on Jason's jeans worked open, and leaned back to unfasten his own.
Jason straightened up from the desk and pressed against him again, his hands sliding under the back of Eric's pants and then pushing them down as far as he could. Eric reached inside Jason's underwear to finally touch and grasp a column of bare flesh, hearing him moan, sucked at his earlobe and trailed nips and kisses down his throat. A moment later Jason's hands were busy too, freeing Eric from his own underwear and encircling him with eager fingers.
They spent perhaps a minute standing like that, stroking each other, both looking down to watch. Then Jason moved again, turning them so that Eric was pushed against the desk. He looked down again and back up, the tip of his tongue running over his upper lip. His voice was hoarse and abrupt as he said, "Do you want me to ...?"
"Yeah, do it," Eric said, his own voice husky. He watched Jason slowly sink to his knees, his free hand wandering over Eric's chest and stomach on the way, until he leaned forward, hesitating only for a moment.
Eric leaned back, resisting the urge to hold the dark-haired head bent before him. The kid wasn't the best he'd ever had, but he had a talented mouth, and lots of enthusiasm. And now, combined with the excitement they had built up on the beach - it was more than enough to bring him to the point of release in only minutes. He closed his eyes, muttered a breathless warning that Jason ignored, and held back all but a low groan as it hit, almost buckling his knees with its pent-up intensity.
Turnabout was fair play ... When Jason climbed to his feet again Eric was still trying to catch his breath, but he reached down and stroked with expert fingers. Judging from the deep moan that produced and the way Jason was thrusting in response, it wouldn't take long - what he was doing would probably be enough, but he wanted the taste and the feel of it in more than his hand. Eric knelt, taking Jason into his mouth, not even minding much when blunt fingers ran through his hair and tugged him forward, once, twice ... and it was over, almost before he had gotten started.
"Oh man," Jason gasped as Eric stood again a few seconds later and straightened his clothing. "That was - great."
"Yeah, not bad," Eric said with a grin. "Fast, but - not bad." Even the quickness of it, after all that buildup, had been kind of a turn-on.
"Uhm ..." Jason sounded almost shy. "I'm up for more. I mean ..." He glanced down at himself. "Give me a few minutes and I will be. How about you?"
More? Eric could already feel the first stirrings of the urge to leave that usually followed these casual encounters - but as he took a second look at Jason's powerful body and handsome face, another stirring made itself known too. After all the delays and frustrations of the evening one quickie wasn't enough, especially when he might not get another chance for awhile. So why not? He could stay another hour or so; with the edge off they could take their time and make things more interesting. He nodded. "Sure, more sounds pretty good."
"Mind if we take our clothes off this time?" Jason was grinning.
Eric returned the smile and peeled his t-shirt off, watching Jason's eyes run appreciatively over his bared upper body, and then venture lower as he pulled off shoes, socks, and jeans, and finally briefs. He did some staring too, as the other man quickly stripped to reveal every inch of smooth, bronzed skin over the contours of hard muscles.
"This bed's mine," Jason said, gesturing.
Eric took a step, then stopped as his hand grazed a picture frame that had already been pushed to the edge of the desk during their previous activities. With a flash of metal, it tumbled to the carpeted floor and landed with a faint thud. Automatically, Eric stooped to pick it up. Standing again, he saw the picture was of Jason himself, looking several years younger, surrounded by five other smiling teenagers. One of them, a boy with long brown hair, was next to Jason with an arm slung over his shoulders.
"Sorry," he said.
"No harm done." Jason reached out to take it and looked down at it for a moment, his mouth momentarily turning into a hint of a frown before he laid it back on the desk - face down. "Just me and some friends from high school," he added.
"Yeah, I guessed." The picture of that happy bunch of kids had cast an unexpected shadow over Eric's mood, with its image of the kind of friends that he had never had himself in school. Except for one - he had his own image of a warm smile and blue eyes, as vivid as any photograph. Deliberately, he replaced it with the sight of the bed as Jason pulled back the blanket, climbed onto it, and lay down looking at him expectantly.
A moment and a couple of steps later he was stretching out on top of the sheets himself, relaxing before letting his hand wander to the expanse of that smooth chest. Eric ran a light finger downwards over firm flesh, tracing the midline of Jason's body, over his navel and following the faint trail of hair leading down. He could see some signs of life again already, and could feel them in himself.
"You're in really great shape," Jason murmured, his own hand slowly skimming over Eric's shoulders and chest.
"Thanks. So are you."
"Gotta be, for martial arts. And sports. You must work out a lot too."
Eric shrugged absently, his attention on a leisurely exploration of Jason's very impressive body from powerful arms to tightly muscled thighs. "When I get a chance. Wasn't a problem in the Army; there was always a gym I could use. My new job is gonna be good that way, too."
"Yeah? What is it? Your new job, I mean."
Eric frowned slightly. "It's - security work. Protection."
"Interesting. Where?"
"A company in Silver Hills ... What's with all the questions?" Eric's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
Jason held up his hand. "Hey, I'm just curious. Just interested. I mean, don't you want to know something about someone when you're - uh ...?"
"Fucking him?"
"Well, yeah, I guess."
"Why should I?" Eric said, frowning again at the echo of Nick's voice that intruded on his mind. 'I just don't like doing it with strangers ...'
"I just think it would be nice. Who knows, maybe we have something in common. Maybe we'd even like each other if we got to know each other."
"You're a hot guy. That's all I need to know." And Eric silenced Jason in the best and fastest way he knew how, by pulling the younger man's head closer for a hard, long kiss, his tongue probing insistently.
Jason responded with a thrust of his own tongue and made a soft sound as Eric moved his hand back down, ran his fingers over the hardness he found there for a few seconds, and then reached around to squeeze the round firmness of that butt he had been wanting all night. He felt his way in and down until his fingers found their target and brushed over it, withdrawing as Jason tensed slightly. Sliding down a little, Eric kissed Jason's neck and throat, teased the hollow between Jason's collarbones with his tongue, and took his time sucking and then gently biting first one nipple and then the other. Jason groaned and bucked his hips, pushing himself against Eric's stomach, hands moving urgently over Eric's shoulders and then trying to push his head farther down.
But Eric had other ideas. He lifted up, his hand between them stroking again, and asked, "Hey, you got any lube here?"
"Any what?" Jason's tightly closed eyes opened, hazy with arousal.
"Lube. I left mine in the car." Eric sat up and reached for the jeans he had dropped on the floor. A moment later he had found what he was looking for and had a foil packet in his hand. "How about oil? Hand lotion?"
"No, I ... what's that?" Jason asked.
Eric glanced down at his own hand. "It's a condom, of course. Don't tell me you don't use them."
Jason propped himself up on his elbows. "No. I mean, I don't do that."
"Don't do what?" Eric asked. "If you want to ride bareback, sorry, that's something I don't do. Not with all the shit going around these days."
"Not the condom. I mean I don't do - you know, anal." Jason was eyeing the condom as if it was some medieval implement of torture.
"What's the problem? You a top? You wanna do me?"
"No!" Jason looked like he was horrified at the idea but trying not to show it. "I just don't do it. I never have and I don't want to now."
"Why not?"
"I guess I'm not ready yet."
"Well, you're not going to know if you're ready unless you try, will you?" Eric asked. "Who knows, maybe you'll like it."
"No. I just don't want to do that with-" Jason cut himself off abruptly.
"With what?" Eric asked softly.
Maybe Jason mistook his gentler tone for understanding instead of the beginnings of anger, because he explained. "I don't want to do it with someone I don't know very well. I mean, no offence, but we just met tonight - maybe someday if we saw each other again and got to be friends or whatever - it's just that I don't like the idea of doing something like that with a ..."
"A stranger?" Eric asked, his voice cool now.
Jason shrugged, looking uncomfortable. "Well, yeah. It's nothing personal."
"Okay. Wouldn't want you to do anything you don't want." Eric got off the bed, bent to pick up his briefs, and pulled them on.
"What are you doing?" Jason asked.
"What's it look like? Getting dressed."
"Hey, you don't have to leave. We can still do other stuff, like before." Jason swung his feet over the edge of the bed and sat up.
"Been there, done that. I'm not in the mood," Eric said as he zipped up his jeans and fastened his belt.
"So because I won't do exactly what you want, you're going to - to take your balls and go home?" Jason demanded, his voice disbelieving and beginning to be angry.
Eric glanced up, amused despite himself, to see the other man glaring at him. "Yeah, I guess that's a good way to put it."
"You're a selfish bastard, you know that?"
"Been told that before." Eric finished putting on his shoes, pulled his t-shirt over his head, and tucked it into his pants. "Well, so long, and nice meeting you," he said, and walked to the door, accompanied by a stony silence. He turned for a last look at the still-naked young man sitting on the bed watching him. For an instant a little voice asked him, 'Are you crazy? Walking out on a guy who looks like that when he's sitting there wanting more?' but a stronger voice was repeating the word, 'Stranger'.
---
Eric could almost feel Jason's angry glare on his back, and could almost hear the sound of the door that had closed between them five years ago. But another sound - Wes's voice - pulled him back from memory into the quiet darkness of his own bedroom and the man lying beside him.
"Why did you leave? Just because Jason wouldn't let you...?"
"No. Not because of that, not really." Eric paused, unsure of how to explain the feeling that had driven him out of that small college dorm room. No, the reason he had walked out was not because he was angry or disappointed or wouldn't have been satisfied with other means of gratification. It was... "It was because we were strangers," he said softly. It was because in the moment when he had said the word, Eric had realized what had been at the edges of his mind all evening, nagging at him without his realizing it.
"Strangers?"
"The sex had been good, but it wasn't enough anymore. I wanted more. I didn't even know what, or didn't want to know, but I knew I wasn't going to find it there and I wasn't going to find it with Jason. All I knew for sure was that I wanted more than sex with a stranger."
TBC...
List of 22: Photograph
Chapter: Closed Doors
Authors: cmar and germankitty
Relationships: Jason/Tommy, Wes/Eric, Jason/Eric
Rating: R
Warning: Strong sexuality, language
"So - we headed back to the car, to drive to Jason's room."
It was almost as if he could smell the ocean again on that beach in San Diego, hear the faint background murmur of waves on the sand and the closer sound of those unwelcome voices, and feel the cool breeze over the heat of kisses and a heady rush of lust that had driven out all other thought, as Eric let his voice trail off. But all it took was a glance at Wes's profile beside him, gazing up at the ceiling expressionlessly, to bring him crashing back to his bedroom in Silver Hills.
"Hey, I'm sorry," he said after a moment.
"For what?" Wes asked.
"You didn't need to hear that." Eric propped his head on one hand, watching Wes's face, and hesitantly touched his partner's shoulder. Maybe it would have been better to refuse to say anything, even the edited version he had just finished telling Wes of that hot, dark night on the beach. But - he knew from experience that sometimes imagination would create scenes worse than the reality.
"It's okay. I asked for it, after all." Wes shifted his eyes to Eric's, and tried to smile. He had known from the beginning of their romantic relationship what Eric had been like years ago, but this was the first time it had really sunk in - that the man he loved had spent years going to gay bars, picking up guys, and having sex with them in alleys, in bathrooms, in dark corners, wherever - and on beaches, apparently. Did it bother him? Yes, he had to admit that, at least to himself. Did it matter? Not as long as Eric wasn't doing it now.
"It was a long time ago. Things were different then. I did things I wouldn't do now," Eric said, almost seeming to echo his thoughts. "But that was the last time. I was already changing, even if I didn't know it yet, and that night was part of it."
"Yeah?" Wes reached up to take the hand Eric had left on his shoulder, and smiled. "So tell me the rest."
"The rest. Well, like I said, we decided to go to Jason's dorm room."
"Yeah ... Was what you told him the real reason you didn't want to go to your hotel - because of a noisy neighbor?"
"No," Eric said. "I didn't want to bring him where he might find out my last name, and I didn't want to have to deal with him maybe wanting to sleep there. I ..." He gave a little snort of laughter. "I didn't want to bring a stranger to my room."
"What's funny?"
"It's just sorta - ironic, I guess, the way it turned out."
"So tell me what happened."
"Are you sure...?"
"Yes, I'm sure. Go on."
"We left the beach, and I drove him back to his college. To his dorm ..."
---
"Take a left here. It's the building on the right. Yeah, park anywhere."
"Okay." Following Jason's instructions, Eric pulled into a small parking lot beside a rambling three-story building that loomed out of the darkness before them. He took a better look as he reached to turn off the ignition and noted that only a few of the windows were lit. "You sure it's okay for me to go in?" he asked.
"Why should anyone stop you?" Jason flashed him a quick grin in the dim light as he opened his door. "You're my guest. Besides, you look like a student."
"Thanks, I guess," Eric muttered. True, he wasn't much older than Jason and most of the other students here, although he felt as if a gulf much larger than a few years loomed between himself and them. Getting out and locking the door, he looked up again at the brick walls, half expecting them to be covered with ivy. "So this is what a college dorm looks like."
"Haven't you ever been on a campus before?"
"No. I lived in a dorm for a while in a prep school. Not college."
"Yeah? Where was that?"
"A little town north of here. You wouldn't know it." Eric shook off the reminder of Wes and started for the walkway at the side of the lot. "Well, are we going in or what?"
"Yeah, we're going." Jason caught up with him, pointed, and then led the way to a side door almost hidden by a clump of bushes. He fished in his pocket for a key ring and unlocked it, went in and held the door for Eric. "We can take the stairs," he said.
A minute later Jason was unlocking another door, one of a line along each side of a hotel-like hallway. He pushed it open, stuck his head in, then flipped on the light and looked back out at Eric. "Okay, the coast is clear," he said. "Come on in."
Inside, Eric glanced over two twin-size beds, one on each side of the room; two small dressers, and two desks with various books strewn over them and on two shelves set on the walls above. It looked like exactly what it was; a room designed to house two people in reasonable comfort in as little space as possible. Another door opening off the short entranceway revealed a small but apparently private bathroom.
"So - what do you think?" Jason asked.
Eric shrugged. "A lot like the prep school dorm. Quieter, though."
"A lot of the guys go home on weekends." Jason paused, watching him. "You didn't go to college at all?"
Eric looked up sharply. "No. Something wrong with that?"
Jason shrugged and smiled. "Of course not. You just seem like a smart guy to me. I was wondering why not."
Eric snorted faintly. "Why? No money is why. That's why I enlisted - I like eating and having a roof over my head."
"But you said you went to a prep school. Don't those cost money?"
"Scholarship. Got taken away."
"Oh. That's too bad. And - I guess your family couldn't afford college?"
"My 'family' was long gone by then," Eric said shortly, in a tone he hoped would discourage more questions.
Apparently it worked. "Sorry to hear that," was all Jason said.
But now he had a pitying look on his face that Eric decided he didn't like. "I've done okay for myself," he muttered.
"Obviously."
Eric crossed the room to where Jason was leaning on one of the desks and stepped in close, shifting his weight to press his lower body against the other man's. All this talking - Jason's curiosity was just another sign that he hadn't done this kind of thing before. Eric had been willing to be considerate of his inexperience so far, but that went only up to a point - a point they had just reached. "Did you bring me here to get my life story or are we going to do what we came to do?" he growled. Without waiting for an answer he reached a hand up and curled his fingers around the back of that strong, thick neck, bringing them together into a harshly demanding kiss, thrusting his tongue into Jason's mouth as soon as it opened for him, feeling teeth grazing lips with bruising force.
Jason responded, his arms closing around Eric's body and squeezing powerfully. The guy was strong, excitingly strong. Eric ran his hands over broad shoulders and down, bringing one between them. Jason shuddered as Eric explored his growing hardness, rubbed for a moment, withdrew long enough to grind their bodies together so Jason could feel him too, and then fumbled with the zipper.
Then Jason was reaching down too, his hands pulling at Eric's belt, loosening it. They struggled with each other's clothing to the tune of their own rapid breathing. Finally Eric got the zipper on Jason's jeans worked open, and leaned back to unfasten his own.
Jason straightened up from the desk and pressed against him again, his hands sliding under the back of Eric's pants and then pushing them down as far as he could. Eric reached inside Jason's underwear to finally touch and grasp a column of bare flesh, hearing him moan, sucked at his earlobe and trailed nips and kisses down his throat. A moment later Jason's hands were busy too, freeing Eric from his own underwear and encircling him with eager fingers.
They spent perhaps a minute standing like that, stroking each other, both looking down to watch. Then Jason moved again, turning them so that Eric was pushed against the desk. He looked down again and back up, the tip of his tongue running over his upper lip. His voice was hoarse and abrupt as he said, "Do you want me to ...?"
"Yeah, do it," Eric said, his own voice husky. He watched Jason slowly sink to his knees, his free hand wandering over Eric's chest and stomach on the way, until he leaned forward, hesitating only for a moment.
Eric leaned back, resisting the urge to hold the dark-haired head bent before him. The kid wasn't the best he'd ever had, but he had a talented mouth, and lots of enthusiasm. And now, combined with the excitement they had built up on the beach - it was more than enough to bring him to the point of release in only minutes. He closed his eyes, muttered a breathless warning that Jason ignored, and held back all but a low groan as it hit, almost buckling his knees with its pent-up intensity.
Turnabout was fair play ... When Jason climbed to his feet again Eric was still trying to catch his breath, but he reached down and stroked with expert fingers. Judging from the deep moan that produced and the way Jason was thrusting in response, it wouldn't take long - what he was doing would probably be enough, but he wanted the taste and the feel of it in more than his hand. Eric knelt, taking Jason into his mouth, not even minding much when blunt fingers ran through his hair and tugged him forward, once, twice ... and it was over, almost before he had gotten started.
"Oh man," Jason gasped as Eric stood again a few seconds later and straightened his clothing. "That was - great."
"Yeah, not bad," Eric said with a grin. "Fast, but - not bad." Even the quickness of it, after all that buildup, had been kind of a turn-on.
"Uhm ..." Jason sounded almost shy. "I'm up for more. I mean ..." He glanced down at himself. "Give me a few minutes and I will be. How about you?"
More? Eric could already feel the first stirrings of the urge to leave that usually followed these casual encounters - but as he took a second look at Jason's powerful body and handsome face, another stirring made itself known too. After all the delays and frustrations of the evening one quickie wasn't enough, especially when he might not get another chance for awhile. So why not? He could stay another hour or so; with the edge off they could take their time and make things more interesting. He nodded. "Sure, more sounds pretty good."
"Mind if we take our clothes off this time?" Jason was grinning.
Eric returned the smile and peeled his t-shirt off, watching Jason's eyes run appreciatively over his bared upper body, and then venture lower as he pulled off shoes, socks, and jeans, and finally briefs. He did some staring too, as the other man quickly stripped to reveal every inch of smooth, bronzed skin over the contours of hard muscles.
"This bed's mine," Jason said, gesturing.
Eric took a step, then stopped as his hand grazed a picture frame that had already been pushed to the edge of the desk during their previous activities. With a flash of metal, it tumbled to the carpeted floor and landed with a faint thud. Automatically, Eric stooped to pick it up. Standing again, he saw the picture was of Jason himself, looking several years younger, surrounded by five other smiling teenagers. One of them, a boy with long brown hair, was next to Jason with an arm slung over his shoulders.
"Sorry," he said.
"No harm done." Jason reached out to take it and looked down at it for a moment, his mouth momentarily turning into a hint of a frown before he laid it back on the desk - face down. "Just me and some friends from high school," he added.
"Yeah, I guessed." The picture of that happy bunch of kids had cast an unexpected shadow over Eric's mood, with its image of the kind of friends that he had never had himself in school. Except for one - he had his own image of a warm smile and blue eyes, as vivid as any photograph. Deliberately, he replaced it with the sight of the bed as Jason pulled back the blanket, climbed onto it, and lay down looking at him expectantly.
A moment and a couple of steps later he was stretching out on top of the sheets himself, relaxing before letting his hand wander to the expanse of that smooth chest. Eric ran a light finger downwards over firm flesh, tracing the midline of Jason's body, over his navel and following the faint trail of hair leading down. He could see some signs of life again already, and could feel them in himself.
"You're in really great shape," Jason murmured, his own hand slowly skimming over Eric's shoulders and chest.
"Thanks. So are you."
"Gotta be, for martial arts. And sports. You must work out a lot too."
Eric shrugged absently, his attention on a leisurely exploration of Jason's very impressive body from powerful arms to tightly muscled thighs. "When I get a chance. Wasn't a problem in the Army; there was always a gym I could use. My new job is gonna be good that way, too."
"Yeah? What is it? Your new job, I mean."
Eric frowned slightly. "It's - security work. Protection."
"Interesting. Where?"
"A company in Silver Hills ... What's with all the questions?" Eric's eyes narrowed suspiciously.
Jason held up his hand. "Hey, I'm just curious. Just interested. I mean, don't you want to know something about someone when you're - uh ...?"
"Fucking him?"
"Well, yeah, I guess."
"Why should I?" Eric said, frowning again at the echo of Nick's voice that intruded on his mind. 'I just don't like doing it with strangers ...'
"I just think it would be nice. Who knows, maybe we have something in common. Maybe we'd even like each other if we got to know each other."
"You're a hot guy. That's all I need to know." And Eric silenced Jason in the best and fastest way he knew how, by pulling the younger man's head closer for a hard, long kiss, his tongue probing insistently.
Jason responded with a thrust of his own tongue and made a soft sound as Eric moved his hand back down, ran his fingers over the hardness he found there for a few seconds, and then reached around to squeeze the round firmness of that butt he had been wanting all night. He felt his way in and down until his fingers found their target and brushed over it, withdrawing as Jason tensed slightly. Sliding down a little, Eric kissed Jason's neck and throat, teased the hollow between Jason's collarbones with his tongue, and took his time sucking and then gently biting first one nipple and then the other. Jason groaned and bucked his hips, pushing himself against Eric's stomach, hands moving urgently over Eric's shoulders and then trying to push his head farther down.
But Eric had other ideas. He lifted up, his hand between them stroking again, and asked, "Hey, you got any lube here?"
"Any what?" Jason's tightly closed eyes opened, hazy with arousal.
"Lube. I left mine in the car." Eric sat up and reached for the jeans he had dropped on the floor. A moment later he had found what he was looking for and had a foil packet in his hand. "How about oil? Hand lotion?"
"No, I ... what's that?" Jason asked.
Eric glanced down at his own hand. "It's a condom, of course. Don't tell me you don't use them."
Jason propped himself up on his elbows. "No. I mean, I don't do that."
"Don't do what?" Eric asked. "If you want to ride bareback, sorry, that's something I don't do. Not with all the shit going around these days."
"Not the condom. I mean I don't do - you know, anal." Jason was eyeing the condom as if it was some medieval implement of torture.
"What's the problem? You a top? You wanna do me?"
"No!" Jason looked like he was horrified at the idea but trying not to show it. "I just don't do it. I never have and I don't want to now."
"Why not?"
"I guess I'm not ready yet."
"Well, you're not going to know if you're ready unless you try, will you?" Eric asked. "Who knows, maybe you'll like it."
"No. I just don't want to do that with-" Jason cut himself off abruptly.
"With what?" Eric asked softly.
Maybe Jason mistook his gentler tone for understanding instead of the beginnings of anger, because he explained. "I don't want to do it with someone I don't know very well. I mean, no offence, but we just met tonight - maybe someday if we saw each other again and got to be friends or whatever - it's just that I don't like the idea of doing something like that with a ..."
"A stranger?" Eric asked, his voice cool now.
Jason shrugged, looking uncomfortable. "Well, yeah. It's nothing personal."
"Okay. Wouldn't want you to do anything you don't want." Eric got off the bed, bent to pick up his briefs, and pulled them on.
"What are you doing?" Jason asked.
"What's it look like? Getting dressed."
"Hey, you don't have to leave. We can still do other stuff, like before." Jason swung his feet over the edge of the bed and sat up.
"Been there, done that. I'm not in the mood," Eric said as he zipped up his jeans and fastened his belt.
"So because I won't do exactly what you want, you're going to - to take your balls and go home?" Jason demanded, his voice disbelieving and beginning to be angry.
Eric glanced up, amused despite himself, to see the other man glaring at him. "Yeah, I guess that's a good way to put it."
"You're a selfish bastard, you know that?"
"Been told that before." Eric finished putting on his shoes, pulled his t-shirt over his head, and tucked it into his pants. "Well, so long, and nice meeting you," he said, and walked to the door, accompanied by a stony silence. He turned for a last look at the still-naked young man sitting on the bed watching him. For an instant a little voice asked him, 'Are you crazy? Walking out on a guy who looks like that when he's sitting there wanting more?' but a stronger voice was repeating the word, 'Stranger'.
---
Eric could almost feel Jason's angry glare on his back, and could almost hear the sound of the door that had closed between them five years ago. But another sound - Wes's voice - pulled him back from memory into the quiet darkness of his own bedroom and the man lying beside him.
"Why did you leave? Just because Jason wouldn't let you...?"
"No. Not because of that, not really." Eric paused, unsure of how to explain the feeling that had driven him out of that small college dorm room. No, the reason he had walked out was not because he was angry or disappointed or wouldn't have been satisfied with other means of gratification. It was... "It was because we were strangers," he said softly. It was because in the moment when he had said the word, Eric had realized what had been at the edges of his mind all evening, nagging at him without his realizing it.
"Strangers?"
"The sex had been good, but it wasn't enough anymore. I wanted more. I didn't even know what, or didn't want to know, but I knew I wasn't going to find it there and I wasn't going to find it with Jason. All I knew for sure was that I wanted more than sex with a stranger."
TBC...
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