lots of thinking
I've already decided I'm going back to school. I'm looking at what I need to do to finally finish college. I'm glad to realize I'm doing this for me. Verizon will actually give me up to $4,000 a year in tuition money. I have a lot of money saved but this will GREATLY help and is something I look forward to taking advantage of.
I broke up with my boyfriend a few days ago and it got me thinking. I'm through wasting my time and their time if I know in my heart they aren't the one, no butterflies in the stomach. I'll be 25 years old this month and I am finally on my way to becoming the woman I want to be. With that comes the thought that maybe I won't find that butterflies in the stomach kind of love again, and maybe that's ok. I guess it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I learned so much about myself in those times and also learned what I wanted in a man, and what I didn't want. If I don't find it again, if that dream of getting married and having kids doesn't work the way I hoped it would, then I need to come up with a plan B.
I've been thinking on and off about adopting. There are a lot of asian people in San Jose and every time I see a little asian baby girl I feel like I've never seen anything more adorable in my life. If plan A doesn't work out then I want to adopt. I want to go back to school for me, so that when and if I do decide to adopt I can provide a stable loving home for that child. Just thinking about a plan B kind of has me excited. Just knowing that my life doesn't depend on somebody else, that I can be happy living my life the way I want to, makes me feel free. It's funny how things don't work out and how sometimes they do. :)
I broke up with my boyfriend a few days ago and it got me thinking. I'm through wasting my time and their time if I know in my heart they aren't the one, no butterflies in the stomach. I'll be 25 years old this month and I am finally on my way to becoming the woman I want to be. With that comes the thought that maybe I won't find that butterflies in the stomach kind of love again, and maybe that's ok. I guess it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. I learned so much about myself in those times and also learned what I wanted in a man, and what I didn't want. If I don't find it again, if that dream of getting married and having kids doesn't work the way I hoped it would, then I need to come up with a plan B.
I've been thinking on and off about adopting. There are a lot of asian people in San Jose and every time I see a little asian baby girl I feel like I've never seen anything more adorable in my life. If plan A doesn't work out then I want to adopt. I want to go back to school for me, so that when and if I do decide to adopt I can provide a stable loving home for that child. Just thinking about a plan B kind of has me excited. Just knowing that my life doesn't depend on somebody else, that I can be happy living my life the way I want to, makes me feel free. It's funny how things don't work out and how sometimes they do. :)