my basic

Jan 25, 2005 04:56

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nenya_kanadka March 20 2005, 16:17:50 UTC
that i had an expectation in my psyche of a protective providing comforting etc system 'over' me
and that i had the character qualities associated with that: loyalty, dedication, deference to leadership etc
and these qualities are transferable, that is, if there were no structure for me to depend on it would not be out of character for me to be involved in building one just to have the sense of security that it offers me

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was saying for me. :)

Reading your posts below and finding them interesting... Most of the time I don't worry much about this stuff, but every so often it comes around and bugs me again. I suppose when I posted my comment about this, that was one of those times.

Have had two dreams in the last week involving Evergreen. That hasn't happened in ages. Wasn't sure if they were "about" the farms or about stuff I'm going through here--fairly unconnected--or even books I'm reading. But it was telling that *that* (feelings and people from Evergreen) was what came up in my dreams, as opposed to something like, say, Star Trek. Lots of strong emotions that I'd forgotten what they felt like.

Anyway. *hugs* Wanted to reply to this and let you know that I had read it in fact.

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where to live (choose your depth) prophetpeter March 21 2005, 19:26:29 UTC
well thank you for reading this
i'm not trying to get you to "worry" but this stuff is in fact down inside, and it is well known that ignoring it tends to drive it deeper (but not away!)
this is ironic because my current (chosen?) lifestyle leaves me less than the minimum time required to develop a healthy inner life (you know, consistent, conscientious, etc) and yet i claim to believe that this is the primary thing and that the inner stuff is reality whereas the outer stuff is just a vapour
sigh
i don't have many people to share this kind of stuff with these days, but i don't want to dump on you any of my thoughts beyond what may continue to interest you. Mom is still the one i can share most with, and she understands a lot (though we don't agree on everything--and usually we agree that that's a good thing!). :)

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Re: where to live (choose your depth) nenya_kanadka March 22 2005, 10:16:15 UTC
Well I don't have very many people that I can still talk about this stuff with--most of my friends from when I was seeing Kathy and going to "river" meetings are people I've lost contact with for various reasons. I live a lot differently inside my head than I did a few years ago, for better or worse...but sometimes I want to talk to someone who thinks that way (inner healing etc). It's good not to dump on me, true. But I do like talking with my dad and attempting to understand him (along with trying to understand How The Universe Works).

More later...got to write some stuff up for linguistics class. :)

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Re: where to live (choose your depth) prophetpeter March 22 2005, 15:43:52 UTC
well at least we share a common dialect (eg the book by i think it was francis mcnutt on inner healing, which you said you liked and which makes sense to me too--as well as lots of others) and enough common experiences to facilitate a dialogue
and the way you live inside your head is flexible enough that you can go through the effort of translating when needed
i admire the quest to understand How The Universe Works, but as you know i spend more of my psychic time/energy/interest on How The INNER Universe Works
more later...got to write up some stuff for a native adult student...

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Re: where to live (choose your depth) nenya_kanadka April 22 2005, 03:12:20 UTC
i admire the quest to understand How The Universe Works, but as you know i spend more of my psychic time/energy/interest on How The INNER Universe Works

Ahh, but what I meant just there was How The Inner Universe Works (and How What Goes On In My Head Connects With Larger Spiritual/Emotional/Philosophical/Political Reality)...

Heh...

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