[ADS]
Turkeys For Sale!!
[an audio clip, recited unwaveringly by a woman who seems to be trying to cram all of this and her own forced cheerfulness in with one breath:] "Starting today until the end of the month, Mike's Exotic Animals will be selling LIVE turkeys for all your Thanksgiving and Christmas needs. A rare bird reported to have lived hundreds of years ago, the turkey is a staple of holiday dinners and is traditionally cooked and stuffed with herbs and spices. Mike's have been hand raised and fed on only the finest of cornmeal, growing to resemble the exotic two-beaked, six-legged, three-winged bird of old. In addition to the still-living variety, we'll also be also selling them precooked and prepared for a reduced price.
If you stop by our stall at the Farmer's Market before 11am, you'll be eligible to enter our grand raffle where you have the chance to win one of these gorgeous birds for FREE! With these deals, there's no excuse for your family not to have a turkey of their very own this Thanksgiving. Don't delay - take one of Mike's home today!"
Flea Market
From noon to 6pm, a student-run flea market will be held at the Cambridge Junior and High school. All proceeds raised will go to the Lost Boys Unisex Orphanage. Please come and check out our treasures!
Free Clothes
My son is moving out and has no use for clothes that have been laying in the back of his closet for years. I don’t think I can get much money for them, so I’m just giving them to anyone who wants them. They look like they’ll fit anyone who’s between 16 or 18 as they are a little on the large size. Please contact Alex McReady for details.
LOOKING FOR A FUN NIGHT
I am a twenty-three year old male seeking a partner who is equally as fun loving and bold as I am. Because I am a natural dom, I’m only seeking partners who are submissive at heart, but I don’t mind if you have a little bite in you. This isn’t for a full-blown relationship, but rather a kinky, wild night between the two of us that will include some of the following:
- Sensual full body massages
- Having me bathe you by hand with a washcloth while you relax and let me play with your feet
- Role-play with you as the naughty little schoolgirl/boy and me as the stern teacher
- You handcuffed to my bed, begging for release as I make your body tingle in ways it’s never experienced before
I’m traditional and would prefer female companionship, but I’m not against male bonding either. ;) Please reply to my ad anonymously so we can work out a date and meeting place for the beginning of our erotic adventure. I am 100% real and serious about this.
Cheap Cooking Ware
Selling an old set of cooking utensils to get the money for new ones. Full set includes two skillets and pots, both stainless steel, a steel colander, and a set of knives good for cutting bread and dicing vegetables. Components have seen some wear, but are still usable. Contact Adriana Josephs with offers.
Custodian Wanted
[another audio clip. a teen girl speaks enthusiastically and unfailingly.] "The Silver Star theater is looking for real dedicated kids and young adults with a strong work ethic to join our staff. Duties include cleaning up the theaters after the audience lets out, making sure that the toilets aren't all gross, and keeping our snake bar stocked with, like, candy and popcorn and all that good stuff. You don't have to be experienced, but it would really, really help your chances of getting the job. And you can't be, like, twelve or something; you've gotta be at least sixteen or older to apply and schedule an interview.
"If you have any questions or wanna see how we do things, just come by and ask for Sally, the general manager. That's me!" [a giggle before the clip cuts out.]
Wanna own a piece of history?
I’m a collector of antiquities from the old world and Mutant paraphernalia. Recently, I was able to purchase a very old looking item from an Awakened, made out of wood with strings attached to it. I think it might be a primitive musical instrument of some sort, but I have no way of finding out for certain as instruments are not my specialty. It was sold with a case for easy transport and looks very weathered, but the seller assured that it was still functional; the only abnormality is the word “Miller” written on the back of the instrument in what looks like ink, but it’s so faded that you hardly know it’s there and can be painted over.
Due to the price I paid for it and obscure nature of the item, I would like to resell it for $2000. I’ll accept trades of equal value, but not haggling. SERIOUS BUYERS ONLY! My CLD username is adams_sundries, so don’t hesitate to message me with offers and insight to what this bizarre thing is!