(no subject)
Why am i such a bastard? Seriously. Perhaps it's a medical condition. I shoud have it checked. Or maybe even a gene. God...but why wouldn't she check on me? Just...just to show me that she cares? I know she cares...why else would she get so upset? Why else would she tell me she loves me all the time? But...why...why would she just let me rot? Why doesn't she want to spend time with me? Why does she just blow me off?
If you're reading this, then TOO DAMN BAD if it hurts. Deal with it. You hurt me too...only with actions.
I didn't tell her because i wanted to avoid a fight. We've already talked about it. But...somehow what i did was wrong. Avoiding her during lunch to NOT fight was apparently stupid. She doesn't see the fact that i needed her, the fact that i needed to talk. She kept asking me in the hallways. "Whats wrong?" and i replied "nothing" for two reasons. 1) it was basically what we've already discussed, and i told her i wouldn't bring it up so much. 2) WE'RE IN A FUCKING HALLWAY.
I didn't want to say or do anything that would make her worry during class. I just tried to cope with it, since thats apparantly what i'm supposed to do. I did need to finish some work, thats not a lie. But, i didn't leave to find her because i wanted her to find me. I guess it was a test, that she FAILED with a capital F for FUCK YOU ELLIS. I get that alot.
I hate this keyboard, it almost hurts to type.
*slaps face a few times*
Thats better, i was getting drowsy.
Umm...i don't know what else to say. Just seems like...like she's blowing me off. She never askes her dad if she can do something until the last minute. Then she makes plans over ours. then she doesn't even want to make more plans...i dunno
It's not even the fact that she can't come over. If she feels that its not a good idea to ask, or if she's JUST ASK and the answer is no, i'd be fine. It would be nice if she just asked her dad. Called towards the end of the day and asked. It would be a) so very very nice to spend time with her and b) easier to get her to the phonathon. Perhaps she's unconfertable with going to my house. If so,she should have just said so. Maybe she just doesn't want to. JUST FUCKING SAY SO. it would hurt, but i'd be a hell of a lot better about it than this whole load of shit.
I'm done for today...my mind is out
I'm fading fast guys...
I love you Laura, but i don't know why you do this. Perhaps i am wrong, but it doesn't matter now. You do what you want, and i'll just be waiting i guess.
there it goes...good bye mind
If you're reading this, then TOO DAMN BAD if it hurts. Deal with it. You hurt me too...only with actions.
I didn't tell her because i wanted to avoid a fight. We've already talked about it. But...somehow what i did was wrong. Avoiding her during lunch to NOT fight was apparently stupid. She doesn't see the fact that i needed her, the fact that i needed to talk. She kept asking me in the hallways. "Whats wrong?" and i replied "nothing" for two reasons. 1) it was basically what we've already discussed, and i told her i wouldn't bring it up so much. 2) WE'RE IN A FUCKING HALLWAY.
I didn't want to say or do anything that would make her worry during class. I just tried to cope with it, since thats apparantly what i'm supposed to do. I did need to finish some work, thats not a lie. But, i didn't leave to find her because i wanted her to find me. I guess it was a test, that she FAILED with a capital F for FUCK YOU ELLIS. I get that alot.
I hate this keyboard, it almost hurts to type.
*slaps face a few times*
Thats better, i was getting drowsy.
Umm...i don't know what else to say. Just seems like...like she's blowing me off. She never askes her dad if she can do something until the last minute. Then she makes plans over ours. then she doesn't even want to make more plans...i dunno
It's not even the fact that she can't come over. If she feels that its not a good idea to ask, or if she's JUST ASK and the answer is no, i'd be fine. It would be nice if she just asked her dad. Called towards the end of the day and asked. It would be a) so very very nice to spend time with her and b) easier to get her to the phonathon. Perhaps she's unconfertable with going to my house. If so,she should have just said so. Maybe she just doesn't want to. JUST FUCKING SAY SO. it would hurt, but i'd be a hell of a lot better about it than this whole load of shit.
I'm done for today...my mind is out
I'm fading fast guys...
I love you Laura, but i don't know why you do this. Perhaps i am wrong, but it doesn't matter now. You do what you want, and i'll just be waiting i guess.
there it goes...good bye mind