I'll build a wall and we can keep them on the other side.
Recently I beheld the sight of a setting sun, yielding to a clouded sky and sinking below the belt of the horizon. I had almost forgotten the simplistic beauty of nature amidst my own introverted angst. Ever look in the mirror at your own reflection after cleansing and find yourself feeling just a bit different? Sprucing up for no particular reason, I had gone clean shaven and even went as far as to try out a new scented lotion/aftershave I had recently been given. Snaring a pair of neatly folded khaki slacks and a preppy tee shirt to accommodate the summer eve, from the corner of my eye I spied the fat book lent to me by my girlfriend--an interesting piece of work taking place in fabled mystical times. As I set foot out into the day just before the stroke of dusk, I nodded quietly to the occasional passerby as I flashed a lopsided grin. My pleasant stroll came to a halt as I approached a humble little park shaded by trees. Casting a wayward glance down the street to the residence of my beloved girlfriend, quiet steps carried me into the park as I found a quiet spot upon a wooden bench. Casually leaning back on the bench as if I owned the place, I began reading a few chapters into the book I held, idly hearing the faint sounds of birds chirping overhead. Just as I found myself immersed in the story, suddenly a movement caught my attention from the corner of my eye. Blinking once, I turned my head just in time to see a young black and white cat hopping around in a small patch of grass, apparently trying to tramp on some poor unsuspecting bug. I couldn't help but smile as I watched the cat hop to and fro, that was until it finally spotted me. As if it had just seen a ghost, the little cat stared at me, and just as I was about to look away, the little cat began stalking towards me, keeping its head down and staying very quiet, as if it thought that just maybe I couldn't see it. Eventually, the sky darkened too much to read and I left the park, sauntering off towards the store to get a snack as I peered up at the sky, billowy clouds of midnight blue hovering over a violet sky which faded into a silver horizon. Utterly beautiful.
My girlfriend and I have scarcely gone out as of late thanks to the bidding of one particular parent (grrrr), just last week we, along with Justine and Val, all went out to pay a visit to the book store Borders. My arms wound around the waist of my baby girl, holding her close as I peered across the vast shelf of Japanese manga, the occasional giddy squeal or distasteful grunt heard from the girls as they flipped through different manga booklets (mostly the only ones with bishounen on the cover). As we all continued seeking out worthwhile manga, Val had ushered me to speak with her alone. Surprised she had known of news involving myself and my girlfriend, I listened as she spoke and gave a nonchalant shrug as I explained a bit of our plan for the future. Afterwards, I snared my girl by the waist as we made way to the coffee lounge to have something sugary. Eyeing the plump fellow working the coffee machine as he seemed to pay close attention to my girl, I gladly hopped up to get the drink when he was finished making it (some time ago a girl working there had been eyeing me--so this tends to happen). Departing from the book store, we decided to stroll along the strip to find what else the area had to offer. Unbeknownst to me then, my girlfriend had held a grudge against the Hallmark company, therefore the sight of it spurred her to innocently walk right up to the front window .. and promptly spew a mouthful of coffee drink goodness against it, which then rightfully so caused all of us to go running away. My highlight of the night was most likely when I spotted (figures it would be me) a Victoria Secret nearby. Almost immediately, my girlfriend hurriedly walked to it with me in tow. Within, we ended up for the most part commenting on how shapely and anatomically correct the mannequin hips were. My highlight--as I mentioned earlier, came in the form of my girlfriend finding something for herself, that which I greatly approved of.
Aside from our assembled trip to the Borders, a memorable experience for me was when my girl and I walked hand in hand to the park just down the street (the very same park aforementioned), and as she sat down upon the swing, I pushed her on it. It was just the two of us, no intervening parents, no drama involving other friends, the world was just the two of us. Of course, it wouldn't have been complete without one of us doing something playful, and therefore as I held on to the chains which held up her swing, she took it upon herself to give my tender region a love tap with her feet. Conveniently, just after she had given me a swift tap between the thighs, somewhere nearby a horrid little child laughed. The world can be so very cruel. So where do I go from here? What kind of person do I become? My ideals have changed significantly (and in my opinion, for the better) recently, i'm no longer the would-be family man who wants only to put right what his father did wrong. I want something great for my life, something impressive. I've already begun to work out how i'm going to get back to school, and I have an idea now of what it is I want to focus on. Love may not be the basis of my life after all, although I would do almost anything to make my girlfriend happy. I'm ecstatic with my girlfriend, i'm just not happy with my own situation right now. My situation with finding employment has become ridiculously frustrating, i've filled applications out and called in, yet no answer. I keep doing what I can to get back into the working class as quickly as I can, and this fucking town is not making an easy task of it. I need to vent, I need to vector out frustration that's been building inside even though i've done my best to bottle it up and keep on keeping on. Times like these are when I wish my comrade were here, so that it could be like those nights out on the back deck, when the frustration of life couldn't follow. Anything to make this frustration go away. My girlfriend has been the only thing keeping me going, and I love her so much.
Am I really your knight? Do I reach my aspirations in hoping even in the darkest of moods I can make you smile? I would give anything just to see you smile at me, that which makes my eyes glisten like a little boy looking upon the first crush in his entire life. I am never satisfied by my words of affection to you, my mind is at unrest, constantly wanting to one-up myself to make you happier. With you, I want to share everything. For the first time in my life, I feel as though I don't feel selfish, I find myself only happy when you're okay. Our lives are changing, and we always say it will be for the better. Without you, I honestly don't feel right. I feel as though my insides are made of ice and that sick feeling just doesn't go away. Regardless of all the hardships we've had to endure just to see one another, I find myself so proud to say you are my girlfriend, to say you are who I want to spend the rest of my life with. People think you and I don't know that the world can be a cruel place, when in reality you and I know this better than they know. We are unlike many people, we carry a burden inside of us that is not easily lifted, but I want you to know that I will be right there beside you all the way, I will see my beloved become a success, and I will do all I can to ensure you are happy for the rest of your life. You mean so very much to me. Aishiteru.
Why do the mistakes I make cost me so dearly?
Alas, now I bask in the subconsciousness of my slumber.
My girlfriend and I have scarcely gone out as of late thanks to the bidding of one particular parent (grrrr), just last week we, along with Justine and Val, all went out to pay a visit to the book store Borders. My arms wound around the waist of my baby girl, holding her close as I peered across the vast shelf of Japanese manga, the occasional giddy squeal or distasteful grunt heard from the girls as they flipped through different manga booklets (mostly the only ones with bishounen on the cover). As we all continued seeking out worthwhile manga, Val had ushered me to speak with her alone. Surprised she had known of news involving myself and my girlfriend, I listened as she spoke and gave a nonchalant shrug as I explained a bit of our plan for the future. Afterwards, I snared my girl by the waist as we made way to the coffee lounge to have something sugary. Eyeing the plump fellow working the coffee machine as he seemed to pay close attention to my girl, I gladly hopped up to get the drink when he was finished making it (some time ago a girl working there had been eyeing me--so this tends to happen). Departing from the book store, we decided to stroll along the strip to find what else the area had to offer. Unbeknownst to me then, my girlfriend had held a grudge against the Hallmark company, therefore the sight of it spurred her to innocently walk right up to the front window .. and promptly spew a mouthful of coffee drink goodness against it, which then rightfully so caused all of us to go running away. My highlight of the night was most likely when I spotted (figures it would be me) a Victoria Secret nearby. Almost immediately, my girlfriend hurriedly walked to it with me in tow. Within, we ended up for the most part commenting on how shapely and anatomically correct the mannequin hips were. My highlight--as I mentioned earlier, came in the form of my girlfriend finding something for herself, that which I greatly approved of.
Aside from our assembled trip to the Borders, a memorable experience for me was when my girl and I walked hand in hand to the park just down the street (the very same park aforementioned), and as she sat down upon the swing, I pushed her on it. It was just the two of us, no intervening parents, no drama involving other friends, the world was just the two of us. Of course, it wouldn't have been complete without one of us doing something playful, and therefore as I held on to the chains which held up her swing, she took it upon herself to give my tender region a love tap with her feet. Conveniently, just after she had given me a swift tap between the thighs, somewhere nearby a horrid little child laughed. The world can be so very cruel. So where do I go from here? What kind of person do I become? My ideals have changed significantly (and in my opinion, for the better) recently, i'm no longer the would-be family man who wants only to put right what his father did wrong. I want something great for my life, something impressive. I've already begun to work out how i'm going to get back to school, and I have an idea now of what it is I want to focus on. Love may not be the basis of my life after all, although I would do almost anything to make my girlfriend happy. I'm ecstatic with my girlfriend, i'm just not happy with my own situation right now. My situation with finding employment has become ridiculously frustrating, i've filled applications out and called in, yet no answer. I keep doing what I can to get back into the working class as quickly as I can, and this fucking town is not making an easy task of it. I need to vent, I need to vector out frustration that's been building inside even though i've done my best to bottle it up and keep on keeping on. Times like these are when I wish my comrade were here, so that it could be like those nights out on the back deck, when the frustration of life couldn't follow. Anything to make this frustration go away. My girlfriend has been the only thing keeping me going, and I love her so much.
Am I really your knight? Do I reach my aspirations in hoping even in the darkest of moods I can make you smile? I would give anything just to see you smile at me, that which makes my eyes glisten like a little boy looking upon the first crush in his entire life. I am never satisfied by my words of affection to you, my mind is at unrest, constantly wanting to one-up myself to make you happier. With you, I want to share everything. For the first time in my life, I feel as though I don't feel selfish, I find myself only happy when you're okay. Our lives are changing, and we always say it will be for the better. Without you, I honestly don't feel right. I feel as though my insides are made of ice and that sick feeling just doesn't go away. Regardless of all the hardships we've had to endure just to see one another, I find myself so proud to say you are my girlfriend, to say you are who I want to spend the rest of my life with. People think you and I don't know that the world can be a cruel place, when in reality you and I know this better than they know. We are unlike many people, we carry a burden inside of us that is not easily lifted, but I want you to know that I will be right there beside you all the way, I will see my beloved become a success, and I will do all I can to ensure you are happy for the rest of your life. You mean so very much to me. Aishiteru.
Why do the mistakes I make cost me so dearly?
Alas, now I bask in the subconsciousness of my slumber.