Dusting Off The Crystal Ball
The fucking noise came back yesterday when I woke up. Ugh. I woke up around 10:30 to be ready for my appointment. It’s a good thing I use the vibrator on my cell phone as an alarm. It’s also a good thing I woke up when I did because just a few minutes later the electric went off. I went upstairs and it was off in the whole house. Sis was calling RG&E. I dressed and went to Advanced for my appointment at 11:30. I noticed on the way that the traffic lights were out too so it appears the blackout was a wide one. There were traffic lights on a few roads down on the way so I figured it was only part of the area.
I got to Advanced but their electric was off too. The man there said I should probably go back home and call back since there was no definitive time when the electric would be back on. On the way home I noticed the traffic lights were working. When I got home the electric was back on. Apparently there was a wire that fell somewhere in the area and cut off the electric to a wide swath of the county. They fixed it pretty quick though. Seeing as my tinnitus was bothering me again real bad I waited a little over a half hour and has Sis call Advanced to try to get me back in. They were able to fit me in at 1:30.
I met a new audiologist this time and eventually found out the last guy who worked with me is no longer there. Which is a good thing because I was just not comfortable with him. I explained my situation and she explained that tinnitus is still one of those unknown mysteries of the ears. There is no specific cause, there may be several and treatment is a rather touch and go area since there is no medication for it. There are hearing aids that help some people address the issue but they are more expensive than the ones I own. She suggested I stop drinking Pepsi Max since it has ginseng in it which may possibly exacerbate it. She also made some minor adjustments to my hearing aids. And suggested I clean my left ear.
I got home and didn’t feel like doing much of anything. When the noise is loud it is extremely distracting and agitating. I went up for dinner w/Chef and Sis (Ham was next door). Chef made gnocchi and sauce that was not really sauce because it was actually the canned tomatoes that she thought would turn into sauce. I went back down to my room watch my shows and then came back up to watch L&O: SVU w/Sis.
When it was done Sis decided she wanted to talk to me about things w/me. She is aware that I have been in the habit for a long time of coasting on empty and living day to day rather than considering the bigger picture of the future. Mainly what’s going on w/the van and employment. She wasn’t upset about anything in particular, she just wanted to bring my attention to this particular fact because she didn’t want me waking up 10 years from now and having nothing to show for my life. She caught me off guard because it’s the first time she’s initiated any discussion on a rather heavy handed topic. It was late and I was flustered because true enough, I am stuck in a huge rut and have not given enough consideration how I’m going to get out it. And I admitted that much. I really do have a hard time wrapping my head around my life which is why I spend most of it on the computer or watching TV and expecting that things will just turn out fine w/out much action on my part. Acknowledging this and trying to figure out what to do about it at 11:30pm at night was a task. What came to mind and I suggested to my sister is that I start by putting both big and small things in writing or at least make the attempt. And then for me to review certain tasks and goals w/her on a semi regular basis. We agreed on that much and then I went downstairs.
The biggest problem right now is the damn tinnitus. It is very difficult to sleep. I watched TV for a while and was up on and off all through this afternoon. There was a point when I thought it might’ve gone away so I fell back asleep only to awaken w/it back. I eventually forced myself to get out of bed and go upstairs since Sis was home.
Sis told me that Dad and his wife are coming for dinner. Ham was at Nurse’s but she didn’t know where Chef was and wasn’t sure who else was coming for dinner. Eventually she found out that Nurse was coming and bringing Ham along with Emo and Dora. Chef had an appointment all day and went to work for the evening right after. We had roasted chicken and a bunch of vegetables. And the usual conversation about my dad’s health and other nonsense things. Dad agreed to take me to my appointment on Monday which is one thing I don’t have to worry about. Nurse had to run an errand. The kids were being rather rambunctious which is not completely unusual but was getting annoying. Later I was cleaning up and Sis remarked pretty much that sentiment. I told her I’m not sure what she expected from them at their age especially when Emo is constantly taunting two girls their age who enjoy screaming and yelling for the heck of it. I try to make a point of not making comments about the parenting choices that are often made since it’s just not my place. I may act as an authority figure at certain times but I make sure I don’t overstep my bounds.
I cleaned up and watched The Big Bang Theory downstairs, came up to finish cleaning and watched CSI. I had Sis put in Debrox in my left ear to clean it out since an exam yesterday showed I had a lot of wax. After CSI I watched The Mentalist which had my WTFing all the way through.
At this point the ringing went away in my right ear. My left ear is not ringing like my right one but there is still some residual mild whistling which though annoying in as much as it’s not completely quiet is much less so than the incessant and often loud ringing in my right ear. There might still be some wax in there and well, it’s wet from the cleaning. I really don’t know what’s causing these phantom noises I just want it to stop. I’m hoping that laying off the Pepsi Max and cleaning my left ear will help. I don’t really know what else to do. My sister saw an ad in the paper about a place that specifically deals with tinittus so if it doesn’t get any better I may give them a call. I’m going to watch OLTL and maybe clear out my DVR some. I hope I’m not up all night again though. And I hope the ringing doesn’t come back. Given a choice I'd rather deal with not hearing anything rather than I can with hearing something I can't stop.
I got to Advanced but their electric was off too. The man there said I should probably go back home and call back since there was no definitive time when the electric would be back on. On the way home I noticed the traffic lights were working. When I got home the electric was back on. Apparently there was a wire that fell somewhere in the area and cut off the electric to a wide swath of the county. They fixed it pretty quick though. Seeing as my tinnitus was bothering me again real bad I waited a little over a half hour and has Sis call Advanced to try to get me back in. They were able to fit me in at 1:30.
I met a new audiologist this time and eventually found out the last guy who worked with me is no longer there. Which is a good thing because I was just not comfortable with him. I explained my situation and she explained that tinnitus is still one of those unknown mysteries of the ears. There is no specific cause, there may be several and treatment is a rather touch and go area since there is no medication for it. There are hearing aids that help some people address the issue but they are more expensive than the ones I own. She suggested I stop drinking Pepsi Max since it has ginseng in it which may possibly exacerbate it. She also made some minor adjustments to my hearing aids. And suggested I clean my left ear.
I got home and didn’t feel like doing much of anything. When the noise is loud it is extremely distracting and agitating. I went up for dinner w/Chef and Sis (Ham was next door). Chef made gnocchi and sauce that was not really sauce because it was actually the canned tomatoes that she thought would turn into sauce. I went back down to my room watch my shows and then came back up to watch L&O: SVU w/Sis.
When it was done Sis decided she wanted to talk to me about things w/me. She is aware that I have been in the habit for a long time of coasting on empty and living day to day rather than considering the bigger picture of the future. Mainly what’s going on w/the van and employment. She wasn’t upset about anything in particular, she just wanted to bring my attention to this particular fact because she didn’t want me waking up 10 years from now and having nothing to show for my life. She caught me off guard because it’s the first time she’s initiated any discussion on a rather heavy handed topic. It was late and I was flustered because true enough, I am stuck in a huge rut and have not given enough consideration how I’m going to get out it. And I admitted that much. I really do have a hard time wrapping my head around my life which is why I spend most of it on the computer or watching TV and expecting that things will just turn out fine w/out much action on my part. Acknowledging this and trying to figure out what to do about it at 11:30pm at night was a task. What came to mind and I suggested to my sister is that I start by putting both big and small things in writing or at least make the attempt. And then for me to review certain tasks and goals w/her on a semi regular basis. We agreed on that much and then I went downstairs.
The biggest problem right now is the damn tinnitus. It is very difficult to sleep. I watched TV for a while and was up on and off all through this afternoon. There was a point when I thought it might’ve gone away so I fell back asleep only to awaken w/it back. I eventually forced myself to get out of bed and go upstairs since Sis was home.
Sis told me that Dad and his wife are coming for dinner. Ham was at Nurse’s but she didn’t know where Chef was and wasn’t sure who else was coming for dinner. Eventually she found out that Nurse was coming and bringing Ham along with Emo and Dora. Chef had an appointment all day and went to work for the evening right after. We had roasted chicken and a bunch of vegetables. And the usual conversation about my dad’s health and other nonsense things. Dad agreed to take me to my appointment on Monday which is one thing I don’t have to worry about. Nurse had to run an errand. The kids were being rather rambunctious which is not completely unusual but was getting annoying. Later I was cleaning up and Sis remarked pretty much that sentiment. I told her I’m not sure what she expected from them at their age especially when Emo is constantly taunting two girls their age who enjoy screaming and yelling for the heck of it. I try to make a point of not making comments about the parenting choices that are often made since it’s just not my place. I may act as an authority figure at certain times but I make sure I don’t overstep my bounds.
I cleaned up and watched The Big Bang Theory downstairs, came up to finish cleaning and watched CSI. I had Sis put in Debrox in my left ear to clean it out since an exam yesterday showed I had a lot of wax. After CSI I watched The Mentalist which had my WTFing all the way through.
At this point the ringing went away in my right ear. My left ear is not ringing like my right one but there is still some residual mild whistling which though annoying in as much as it’s not completely quiet is much less so than the incessant and often loud ringing in my right ear. There might still be some wax in there and well, it’s wet from the cleaning. I really don’t know what’s causing these phantom noises I just want it to stop. I’m hoping that laying off the Pepsi Max and cleaning my left ear will help. I don’t really know what else to do. My sister saw an ad in the paper about a place that specifically deals with tinittus so if it doesn’t get any better I may give them a call. I’m going to watch OLTL and maybe clear out my DVR some. I hope I’m not up all night again though. And I hope the ringing doesn’t come back. Given a choice I'd rather deal with not hearing anything rather than I can with hearing something I can't stop.