Cold Comfort
The last few moments were still as amazing as it all had been, but I wasn't so lost that I couldn't feel something change. The tears on Faith's cheeks flowed too freely, and there was something she said that I couldn't make out, but there was nothing in the way it sounded that was right.
When I came, and Faith swallowed me down, I drifted into the release of it, let myself fall into the feel of her mouth surrounding me, but only for a moment.
Afterwards, Faith looked back up at me, and through the curtain of dark soft curls, returned to me as lost and sad an expression as I'd ever seen. Certainly not the face I'd expected to see after what we'd just done, the pleasurable memory of which was fading quickly.
"Sorry... I'm sorry... just... fuck..."
Her voice was low and shook with a tone that unbalanced me and all the preconceptions I'd ever had about this young woman. With a sob, she turned away, clutching a pillow to herself, and curling closed as tightly as she could.
For a moment, I watched her shoulders tremble with crying. My heart dropped out of my chest, a cold, horrified space in place of it.
What had I done? I'd shown Faith more of what I was capable of, more of the man inside of myself than anyone had seen since Lilah-- and even she had never forced the kind of honesty out of me that I'd known just a few minutes ago. Faith had seen me... and it was wrong.
There was a darkness in me, I knew that, and I had thought that it would resonate, somehow, with hers, allowing me to finally give her the help I knew she needed. Instead, she was turning from that shadow, and I had to wonder whether that was truly the right thing to do.
What I did feel the need to do, though, was to at least try to help and salvage the damage I'd done. My hand reached out and touched lightly onto Faith's shoulder.
"Faith... I'm-- I'm sorry."
She looked so very vulnerable in that moment, and that was the last straw for me. The Faith I knew was not that, was strong and self-assured, and could weather anything. She didn't deserve for me to break that resolve. Hoping that she wouldn't turn away what little comfort I could offer, I sidled my body up behind hers, curling my arm around her, on top of her own.
"Do you... do you want me to go?"
((Open to Faith.))
When I came, and Faith swallowed me down, I drifted into the release of it, let myself fall into the feel of her mouth surrounding me, but only for a moment.
Afterwards, Faith looked back up at me, and through the curtain of dark soft curls, returned to me as lost and sad an expression as I'd ever seen. Certainly not the face I'd expected to see after what we'd just done, the pleasurable memory of which was fading quickly.
"Sorry... I'm sorry... just... fuck..."
Her voice was low and shook with a tone that unbalanced me and all the preconceptions I'd ever had about this young woman. With a sob, she turned away, clutching a pillow to herself, and curling closed as tightly as she could.
For a moment, I watched her shoulders tremble with crying. My heart dropped out of my chest, a cold, horrified space in place of it.
What had I done? I'd shown Faith more of what I was capable of, more of the man inside of myself than anyone had seen since Lilah-- and even she had never forced the kind of honesty out of me that I'd known just a few minutes ago. Faith had seen me... and it was wrong.
There was a darkness in me, I knew that, and I had thought that it would resonate, somehow, with hers, allowing me to finally give her the help I knew she needed. Instead, she was turning from that shadow, and I had to wonder whether that was truly the right thing to do.
What I did feel the need to do, though, was to at least try to help and salvage the damage I'd done. My hand reached out and touched lightly onto Faith's shoulder.
"Faith... I'm-- I'm sorry."
She looked so very vulnerable in that moment, and that was the last straw for me. The Faith I knew was not that, was strong and self-assured, and could weather anything. She didn't deserve for me to break that resolve. Hoping that she wouldn't turn away what little comfort I could offer, I sidled my body up behind hers, curling my arm around her, on top of her own.
"Do you... do you want me to go?"
((Open to Faith.))