Down to Two
A few hours after the run-in with the M'Fashnik demons, Faith and I were again on our own. At the bar, Ms. Finn had been rather cagey about her identity and just what she was doing fighting demons in downtown Las Vegas, but after being informed about Faith's and my backgrounds, Sam became a sight more talkative. I'd heard about the Initiative and
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Fuck. I wanted to cry, cuz even though he'd said it before? The hurt was just a little bit more... gone now. Every fucking sweet thing he said to me just made it all slowly better. Couldn't tell him that, though. So I just stood there, staring up at him as he stepped even closer to me and then I had to fight to not touch him, to not tell him that he was making it all better.
Fuck, why couldn't he just make it all better?
"I think... I think I know you better, somehow...And I don't mean just because we slept together. I'm talking about really knowing you."
"Really?" Didn't think anyone really knew me, except maybe Angel. Well, even then? Angel didn't know everything. Shit, I wasn't sure I knew the real me. How could Wes be sure?
I wanted it, though. So bad, I wanted him to know me. I think... I think I needed someone to know me.
And to not fucking bolt after they did.
"I think about how much I wanted-- and still want-- to help you, and how you told me that you didn't need saving. And you? Do you think about it?"
"Don't need any help, Wes, just need my Watcher," I whispered as I managed to pry my eyes away from his to stare at the ground again. Seemed I was either totally entranced by those eyes, or scared shitless of them.
"I think about it," I admitted, scared of telling him the next part but fuck it. I could always beat the shit outta him if he laughed at me.
"I'm thinking about it right now."
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