Vacation Bible School Blues
An ethical dilemma, but first, some highlights:
- I am now at 191 lbs.! (This after about two months of yo-yoing back and forth around 195 like I was caught in the combined gravitational well of a double star-system with bi-polar disorder.) My goal this week is to at least maintain that weight, if not go down a little more. If I maintain, I will be satisified. Of course, I just ate the last two and 1/2 pices of my birthday fruit tart that Linda made me, but I took off 10 xtra points from next week to help offset that. I know you're not supposed to do that, but meh, they're optional to be eaten anyway. Look at me rationalize, folks!
- I am now helping to instruct (along with my training partner Greg) in my Tai Chi class. It feels good, but also is a fair bit intimidating, since it shows me obviously how little actually know. Like when this guy Jeremey, a multiple degree black belt in Hapkido and I are working on Fa-jing punches and kicks, and he asks me if the kicking in Tai Chi is any different than inother styles (specifically his). I just draw a blank look and mumble my way through the best explanation I can pull out of my ass at the time. I didn't say anything that wasn't technically true (In the case of the front snap kick, you chamber, but let the lower half of your leg swing up freely, and you inhale on kicks, as opposing to exhaling on punches) But I still felt like a bit of a wonk.
- Onto the dilemma. Two years ago, I agreed to hekp out with our (Mine and Lisa's) church VBS (Vacation Bible School). I wanted to be involved in the church community and be of some service, and this seemed like a way I could use my talents (I run the "Faith Fusion Finale" which involves a little ating, some improvisation, and the ability to make yourself heard over thirty rowdy kids). Most of the lessons, like I said, are fairly harmless from my standpoint. Trust in God. Care for Others. Pray. etc etc. I can get behind all that. Its just when, somewhere around the 4th or 5th day (and this seems to be a common thread), the instructional packet that goes along with the whole thing (In the case of this particular VBS cycle, the theme is "Crocodile Dock", a southern Bayou theme, and the character of the day is a Possum named Blossom. And the Bible verse is "Don't be Afraid...he is risen from the dead". Obviously talking about Jesus H Christ here, you know the story, so lets go on. The case here is, that I am supposed to teach how 1)Jesus died for our sins, because God hates sin, and he needed someone to be punished for man's sin, Jesus took that, and died for us. and 2) He rose from the dead, so everything is Kosher again.
1) I don't know what to believe about Jesus dying for our sins. I like to believe in a God that wouldn't require that as some kind of cosmic penance. Though i certainly can imagine and take a leap of faith that the kind of man I hope Jesus was, he would've certainly been capable of giving his life for others, the idea that sin can separate us from God in that way does not mesh with my experience. yes, because of sin, I feel separated from God, but I believe God is still there with me, and that nothing can separate me from God's love, least of all God. I'll state my blief here plainly: I don't believe Jesus HAD to die on the cross for our sins. Because of our sins, yeah, but not for them. Plus, then the materials give us suggestions on how to get kids to accept Jesus into their lives.
2) I guess as an older person, I can see the flip side of this coin. What if, as a kid, I DON'T accept Jesus? (They never mention hell and torment, but when you think about it, where else would it lead?) That's my problem here. I don't believe anyone has to accept Jesus. Nor should they accept him exactly as given by the people at the VBS supply company. I am a Christian, I do my damndest to live a good life, do the right thing, and love my neighbor as best as I am able to. I pray to God. I admit I'm a sinner, just like everyone else. But if I don't say that "jesus died for me and his blood washed away all my sins", then WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WILL HAPPEN TO ME?
The thing is, i know that part of sin is self-absorbtion and selfishness, and thinking that somehow my theological leanings are somehow more important than our church's need to minister to the kiddies is probably just as sinful as anything I could think of.
And to answer Lisa's inevitable question. Yes, part of this is the fact that VBS is so Goddamn cheesy that it makes me want to go out and buy some tortilla chips and rent a good movie,
- I am now at 191 lbs.! (This after about two months of yo-yoing back and forth around 195 like I was caught in the combined gravitational well of a double star-system with bi-polar disorder.) My goal this week is to at least maintain that weight, if not go down a little more. If I maintain, I will be satisified. Of course, I just ate the last two and 1/2 pices of my birthday fruit tart that Linda made me, but I took off 10 xtra points from next week to help offset that. I know you're not supposed to do that, but meh, they're optional to be eaten anyway. Look at me rationalize, folks!
- I am now helping to instruct (along with my training partner Greg) in my Tai Chi class. It feels good, but also is a fair bit intimidating, since it shows me obviously how little actually know. Like when this guy Jeremey, a multiple degree black belt in Hapkido and I are working on Fa-jing punches and kicks, and he asks me if the kicking in Tai Chi is any different than inother styles (specifically his). I just draw a blank look and mumble my way through the best explanation I can pull out of my ass at the time. I didn't say anything that wasn't technically true (In the case of the front snap kick, you chamber, but let the lower half of your leg swing up freely, and you inhale on kicks, as opposing to exhaling on punches) But I still felt like a bit of a wonk.
- Onto the dilemma. Two years ago, I agreed to hekp out with our (Mine and Lisa's) church VBS (Vacation Bible School). I wanted to be involved in the church community and be of some service, and this seemed like a way I could use my talents (I run the "Faith Fusion Finale" which involves a little ating, some improvisation, and the ability to make yourself heard over thirty rowdy kids). Most of the lessons, like I said, are fairly harmless from my standpoint. Trust in God. Care for Others. Pray. etc etc. I can get behind all that. Its just when, somewhere around the 4th or 5th day (and this seems to be a common thread), the instructional packet that goes along with the whole thing (In the case of this particular VBS cycle, the theme is "Crocodile Dock", a southern Bayou theme, and the character of the day is a Possum named Blossom. And the Bible verse is "Don't be Afraid...he is risen from the dead". Obviously talking about Jesus H Christ here, you know the story, so lets go on. The case here is, that I am supposed to teach how 1)Jesus died for our sins, because God hates sin, and he needed someone to be punished for man's sin, Jesus took that, and died for us. and 2) He rose from the dead, so everything is Kosher again.
1) I don't know what to believe about Jesus dying for our sins. I like to believe in a God that wouldn't require that as some kind of cosmic penance. Though i certainly can imagine and take a leap of faith that the kind of man I hope Jesus was, he would've certainly been capable of giving his life for others, the idea that sin can separate us from God in that way does not mesh with my experience. yes, because of sin, I feel separated from God, but I believe God is still there with me, and that nothing can separate me from God's love, least of all God. I'll state my blief here plainly: I don't believe Jesus HAD to die on the cross for our sins. Because of our sins, yeah, but not for them. Plus, then the materials give us suggestions on how to get kids to accept Jesus into their lives.
2) I guess as an older person, I can see the flip side of this coin. What if, as a kid, I DON'T accept Jesus? (They never mention hell and torment, but when you think about it, where else would it lead?) That's my problem here. I don't believe anyone has to accept Jesus. Nor should they accept him exactly as given by the people at the VBS supply company. I am a Christian, I do my damndest to live a good life, do the right thing, and love my neighbor as best as I am able to. I pray to God. I admit I'm a sinner, just like everyone else. But if I don't say that "jesus died for me and his blood washed away all my sins", then WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WILL HAPPEN TO ME?
The thing is, i know that part of sin is self-absorbtion and selfishness, and thinking that somehow my theological leanings are somehow more important than our church's need to minister to the kiddies is probably just as sinful as anything I could think of.
And to answer Lisa's inevitable question. Yes, part of this is the fact that VBS is so Goddamn cheesy that it makes me want to go out and buy some tortilla chips and rent a good movie,