LJ Idol Week 11, Part 2: If the Creek Don’t Rise
A rite of passage, it seems, for new parents is to withstand the barrage of unsolicited advice. She should eat this, but she shouldn't eat that. If she’s unhappy, onlookers readily assess the problem as if you haven’t spent literally every day of her life with her and cannot possibly understand what causes a shift in her mood.
Sometimes it’s not even advice; sometimes it’s some irrelevant or useless fact thrown in to the conversation as if you aren't already doing too many things at once. I took Aurora’s temperature on Christmas while my parents were visiting because she felt warm and was abnormally cranky and my mother had to remind everyone that my temperature ran low as a child before then attempting to diagnose a problem that didn’t exist.
My mother-in-law, who lives closer than my parents and, therefore, we see more frequently, has a history of giving us unwarranted advice. When we were struggling to breastfeed and had to supplement with formula, she made numerous comments about how much better breastmilk was than formula despite the fact that I was pumping every two hours instead of sleeping. When Aurora started eating solid food, she chastised us for the amount of carbs and fruit we were giving Aurora.
Because of a special schedule that meant I had classes to teach on days I am normally not on campus, my mother-in-law watched Aurora one day last week. When I got home to relieve her, she made a couple comments regarding Aurora’s skills that stuck out to me. First, she commented on Aurora’s speech and how she’s putting four words together now and, second, she shared that she was surprised with the amount of letters and shapes Aurora can identify. Third, she reveled at how naturally Aurora put her toys away before getting new toys out. Then she continued by suggesting we should enroll Aurora in preschool instead of her in-home daycare that she currently goes to three days a week as if she forgot her compliments only moments ago that have been the result of hard work by myself, a teacher who literally gets paid to teach students to read, and that daycare she seems so against despite knowing nothing about what it has to offer other than not being her or her idea.
I haven’t quite gotten to the point where I’m comfortable speaking my unfiltered mind--I do a lot of noncommittal grunts and nods--to my mother-in-law, but one of these days, I won’t be able to hold back the flood.
Sometimes it’s not even advice; sometimes it’s some irrelevant or useless fact thrown in to the conversation as if you aren't already doing too many things at once. I took Aurora’s temperature on Christmas while my parents were visiting because she felt warm and was abnormally cranky and my mother had to remind everyone that my temperature ran low as a child before then attempting to diagnose a problem that didn’t exist.
My mother-in-law, who lives closer than my parents and, therefore, we see more frequently, has a history of giving us unwarranted advice. When we were struggling to breastfeed and had to supplement with formula, she made numerous comments about how much better breastmilk was than formula despite the fact that I was pumping every two hours instead of sleeping. When Aurora started eating solid food, she chastised us for the amount of carbs and fruit we were giving Aurora.
Because of a special schedule that meant I had classes to teach on days I am normally not on campus, my mother-in-law watched Aurora one day last week. When I got home to relieve her, she made a couple comments regarding Aurora’s skills that stuck out to me. First, she commented on Aurora’s speech and how she’s putting four words together now and, second, she shared that she was surprised with the amount of letters and shapes Aurora can identify. Third, she reveled at how naturally Aurora put her toys away before getting new toys out. Then she continued by suggesting we should enroll Aurora in preschool instead of her in-home daycare that she currently goes to three days a week as if she forgot her compliments only moments ago that have been the result of hard work by myself, a teacher who literally gets paid to teach students to read, and that daycare she seems so against despite knowing nothing about what it has to offer other than not being her or her idea.
I haven’t quite gotten to the point where I’m comfortable speaking my unfiltered mind--I do a lot of noncommittal grunts and nods--to my mother-in-law, but one of these days, I won’t be able to hold back the flood.