conclusions
So lately...ive been doing lots of thinking. Its kinda funny how things in life go sometimes. Like take friends for instance...who would have thought that my one best friend...i wouldnt be friends with anymore over the person that im dating? Its not only one person whose screwed up..its both. Me and her. I ran to him all the time...while she stood with the rest of them who didnt like him. Its funny how your enemies tell you what you need to hear like "You're not dating him for us..you're dating him for you." now i look around...and im not friends with the people that i was when i started college...but she was right...im dating him for me and the way that he makes me feel...and this Feb 4th...it will be a year..something must be right. I kinda knew that i would lose her friendship in the end...and hell i wish that she was still here, but i guess thats not how life is...and its not even about drinking or the alcohol. i dont think it ever was. I made the decision the be with him more than them and i will accept the end result for it...and i have. It just seems like "well fuck you..." and all i have to say is
"I hope you're happy
Now that you're choosing this
I hope it brings you bliss
I really hope you get it
And you don't live to regret it
I hope you're happy in the end
I hope you're happy, my friend"
And my mom wants to me to stay around, so if she falls, she will have someone...i just can't. I dont want her to crash and i dont think that she will and thats a good thing. But i can't sit around hoping that she will finally remember that i was her best friend at one point. And if in the end...he and i dont work out...I wont go crawling back...i have other friends.
so why write something like this...becuz i need to get it out of my system...its been there a while..and i just needed to write it out. Do i think she will ever read this? no....i dont think she will and im ok with that. I knew what i had to do and i made my peace with it a long time ago back when she made plans to live with someone else for the next sem. I couldnt hang on her forever...
Goodbye old friend...may life treat you well
"I hope you're happy
Now that you're choosing this
I hope it brings you bliss
I really hope you get it
And you don't live to regret it
I hope you're happy in the end
I hope you're happy, my friend"
And my mom wants to me to stay around, so if she falls, she will have someone...i just can't. I dont want her to crash and i dont think that she will and thats a good thing. But i can't sit around hoping that she will finally remember that i was her best friend at one point. And if in the end...he and i dont work out...I wont go crawling back...i have other friends.
so why write something like this...becuz i need to get it out of my system...its been there a while..and i just needed to write it out. Do i think she will ever read this? no....i dont think she will and im ok with that. I knew what i had to do and i made my peace with it a long time ago back when she made plans to live with someone else for the next sem. I couldnt hang on her forever...
Goodbye old friend...may life treat you well