Working past the stress
~~~~~~~~~~~Ugh, those panic attacks..
I'm trying hard to make it pass those horrid panic attacks. I try to make it a point to get up, and out each day, if only for a coffee or frozen coffee.
I smile at the neighbors, and try to be happy. They say pretending to be happy has a funny effect, you wind up smiling on your own. It seems to be working.
~~~~~~~~~~~~I love being a girl!...
I like the new hairstyle, its pretty different for someone like me. Purple streaks? But I get compliments, and I need the ego boost. A girl with cute tattoos said it was great, she was signing up people for a blood drive by the supermart. Ego boost!
Took my cousin a few days to noticed.. hey Paula, do you know your hair is purple on top? D'uh, yes Mark! (yes, another Mark.. sheesh) My son actually didn't hide. He knows I'm going thru this fashion thing lately. No more "mom" slacks. No more hiding in huge guy teeshirts.
I'm finally hitting a girl-y phase. Well, it took me long enough. Another cousin of mine, a bit older, just started getting a body full of tattoos. and shocking pinkish hair. Not me, needles scare the shit out of me. Blood draws make me woozy. The only tat I'm getting is a rub-on tattoo.
But I can play with my hair, my makeup, my clothes. I'm having fun, putting myself on a little fashion show.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Still on track!
Still on a health conscious thing, still shying away from eating crap like cookies cakes and candy. Lost another pound. Yay!
Now don't believe for a moment that I don't miss my Oreos, cheesecake, and other assorted crap. Especially chocolate, my downfall.
But having a goal, and a mental picture, makes it much easier.
I don't know if I'll get back down to my honeymoon weight. I was a slim size 8 then, and somehow thought I was fat. Ha!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back history...
Maybe having a size 3 sister gave me poor self esteem. Then again the other sister was as big as a Mack truck. So I was alright. I got whistles from construction workers; I suppose that was a thumbs up.
~~~~~~~~~~~I'm not emo!...
Okay, didn't do my hair in shocking pink, or rainbow stripes. It's not age, just... I dunno, it's not me right now. But a few streaks of purple against the bright red looks good in the sun, and I can brush it under if I need to look more.. businesslike? Whatever. Even that guy who supposedly sold out to "the man" has some hot pink in his hair. So I guess I'm not all that wild.
~~~~~~~~~~I like myself...
My hair's a bit Sharon Osborne, but that's okay. I like it. I like me. Things are working out much better at home too. Had a spat with hubby, and he felt bad. He's sick with a bad cold, and thinks of it as his punishment. My lips are sealed, let him stew!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~Still on regimented eating...
I'm having a "light" Coffee Coolata, skim milk, Splenda, and cinnamon flavor. That, and my daily bran. Blech, but fiber is supposed to be good when losing weight. Well, it does have it's good effects; filling, and other stuff. I had a coupon for a free doughnut, but skipped it.. willpower! I'll give the next coupon to Scott, he doesn't need to worry about being fat, just doing his weights (stop dropping them hard on the floor, you make me jump out of my skin!!!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~So...
So, should I get rainbow hair.... nah. Maybe a few retro tie dye shirts? Or something with a flirty neckline. I can deal with that. I'm a female, I'm tired of hiding in loose fitting jeans and over-sized shirts.
I'm okay, and I like myself today too. Hugs for me, hugs for you, hugs for everyone!
I'm trying hard to make it pass those horrid panic attacks. I try to make it a point to get up, and out each day, if only for a coffee or frozen coffee.
I smile at the neighbors, and try to be happy. They say pretending to be happy has a funny effect, you wind up smiling on your own. It seems to be working.
~~~~~~~~~~~~I love being a girl!...
I like the new hairstyle, its pretty different for someone like me. Purple streaks? But I get compliments, and I need the ego boost. A girl with cute tattoos said it was great, she was signing up people for a blood drive by the supermart. Ego boost!
Took my cousin a few days to noticed.. hey Paula, do you know your hair is purple on top? D'uh, yes Mark! (yes, another Mark.. sheesh) My son actually didn't hide. He knows I'm going thru this fashion thing lately. No more "mom" slacks. No more hiding in huge guy teeshirts.
I'm finally hitting a girl-y phase. Well, it took me long enough. Another cousin of mine, a bit older, just started getting a body full of tattoos. and shocking pinkish hair. Not me, needles scare the shit out of me. Blood draws make me woozy. The only tat I'm getting is a rub-on tattoo.
But I can play with my hair, my makeup, my clothes. I'm having fun, putting myself on a little fashion show.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Still on track!
Still on a health conscious thing, still shying away from eating crap like cookies cakes and candy. Lost another pound. Yay!
Now don't believe for a moment that I don't miss my Oreos, cheesecake, and other assorted crap. Especially chocolate, my downfall.
But having a goal, and a mental picture, makes it much easier.
I don't know if I'll get back down to my honeymoon weight. I was a slim size 8 then, and somehow thought I was fat. Ha!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~Back history...
Maybe having a size 3 sister gave me poor self esteem. Then again the other sister was as big as a Mack truck. So I was alright. I got whistles from construction workers; I suppose that was a thumbs up.
~~~~~~~~~~~I'm not emo!...
Okay, didn't do my hair in shocking pink, or rainbow stripes. It's not age, just... I dunno, it's not me right now. But a few streaks of purple against the bright red looks good in the sun, and I can brush it under if I need to look more.. businesslike? Whatever. Even that guy who supposedly sold out to "the man" has some hot pink in his hair. So I guess I'm not all that wild.
~~~~~~~~~~I like myself...
My hair's a bit Sharon Osborne, but that's okay. I like it. I like me. Things are working out much better at home too. Had a spat with hubby, and he felt bad. He's sick with a bad cold, and thinks of it as his punishment. My lips are sealed, let him stew!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~Still on regimented eating...
I'm having a "light" Coffee Coolata, skim milk, Splenda, and cinnamon flavor. That, and my daily bran. Blech, but fiber is supposed to be good when losing weight. Well, it does have it's good effects; filling, and other stuff. I had a coupon for a free doughnut, but skipped it.. willpower! I'll give the next coupon to Scott, he doesn't need to worry about being fat, just doing his weights (stop dropping them hard on the floor, you make me jump out of my skin!!!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~So...
So, should I get rainbow hair.... nah. Maybe a few retro tie dye shirts? Or something with a flirty neckline. I can deal with that. I'm a female, I'm tired of hiding in loose fitting jeans and over-sized shirts.
I'm okay, and I like myself today too. Hugs for me, hugs for you, hugs for everyone!