dream...
pay no mind what other voices say. they don't care about you like i do.
i scrambled frantically over the floor, looking for what was playing the music. it was a perfect circle's, "lullaby", and i was going crazy trying to find where it was coming from.
i grabbed books and threw them off the shelf. i dumped everythig out of my closet. i dug through my laundry basket, but i couldn't find where the music was coming from.
i crawled under my bed, and started throwing things out from under it. "Where the fuck are you!" i yelled, tosing things in every direction.
then i saw it. my little pink notebook. on the inside, was clipped the note from sean, the one that said "i love you nyssa" and clipping behind it was a couple of razor blades that i had used for cutting before.
i dug the razor into my arm, and drew it across. the pain was soothing. i became numb, and dug again and again, until my blood was everywhere. all over my bed, all over the books and clothes i had dumped on teh floor in my mad search.
the song stopped, and i woke up.
i lay there in bed a couple of minutes, and i had the mad urge to cut.
i dug through under my bed to find the little pink notebook. it was there. i removed the razors, and brought them into the bathroom, where i flushed them down the toilet. and i sat on the bathroom floor, fighting the urge to cry.
but i suddenly felt relief. i felt strangely.... happy....
could this be the beginning of the end...?
i scrambled frantically over the floor, looking for what was playing the music. it was a perfect circle's, "lullaby", and i was going crazy trying to find where it was coming from.
i grabbed books and threw them off the shelf. i dumped everythig out of my closet. i dug through my laundry basket, but i couldn't find where the music was coming from.
i crawled under my bed, and started throwing things out from under it. "Where the fuck are you!" i yelled, tosing things in every direction.
then i saw it. my little pink notebook. on the inside, was clipped the note from sean, the one that said "i love you nyssa" and clipping behind it was a couple of razor blades that i had used for cutting before.
i dug the razor into my arm, and drew it across. the pain was soothing. i became numb, and dug again and again, until my blood was everywhere. all over my bed, all over the books and clothes i had dumped on teh floor in my mad search.
the song stopped, and i woke up.
i lay there in bed a couple of minutes, and i had the mad urge to cut.
i dug through under my bed to find the little pink notebook. it was there. i removed the razors, and brought them into the bathroom, where i flushed them down the toilet. and i sat on the bathroom floor, fighting the urge to cry.
but i suddenly felt relief. i felt strangely.... happy....
could this be the beginning of the end...?