Closer than Most 6
“I just have to say it once, you just need to hear it,” Damon said as he placed his hands on her upper arms. She was frozen under his gaze and her heart responded to his closeness immediately.
“I love you, Elena,” he finally said. “And it’s because I love you that,” he paused for a moment as if he was searching for just the right words, “I can’t be selfish with you. Why you can’t know this. I don’t deserve you, but my brother does.”
She felt the sting of tears behind her eyes at his words. Then he took a step closer to her as if he was going to kiss her. In that moment, that was all she wanted, no matter how wrong it was. Instead, he placed the softest of kisses to her forehead before pulling back to look her in the eye.
“God, I wish you didn’t have to forget this,” he whispered as his fingers tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “But you do.” His eyes held hers for a long moment before she closed her eyes.
Her eyes snapped open and she realized she was in her room, the same room that was in her dream. Every night that dream became more and more real. It almost felt like a memory. She could almost remember what events led up to that moment in her room. The memory would float into her mind and then disappear as quickly as it came.
She threw herself out of her bed with Damon on the forefront of her mind. She was so confused. She felt like she knew him, really knew him and that he was someone she could trust. Yet, Stefan’s words still echoed in her mind. He loved Katherine and she looked like Katherine. She wanted to push him out of her life, but her heart was not going to let her. She still wanted to be near him, to talk to him, to bicker with him. She wanted to have the same effect on him that he had on her. She hated not being in control of her emotions.
---BREAK---
He was listening to the busty blonde talk his ear off about God knows what. He really didn’t care, but she was easy on the eyes and after everything that happened with Elena, he could use an easy lay. His old style would just be to feed off her, fuck her, and then probably kill her. However, killing people wasn’t as easy anymore with a human conscious.
This game he was playing with Elena was a dangerous one. He wanted her just as much as he did as a vampire, maybe more with the way his human emotions reacted to her. He wanted her, he wanted her the way he had her the night before she left. But he needed to be honest with her. It wasn’t safe for her to be in the dark about her past. He was afraid. Damon Salvatore was afraid. He didn’t want her to go running in the other direction, he didn’t want her to leave again. Even if he could only stare at her from afar, he’d settle for that.
He felt her presence as soon as she entered the building. He turned to see her and his eyes almost bulged out of his sockets. She was wearing jeans that fit like a second skin and disappeared into boots that started just below her knees. She had a shimmery tank top on with a black leather jacket over it. Her hair had a slight curl to it. He almost would have thought it was Katherine who just walked in if it wasn’t for the way she wobbled slightly on her stilettoed boots. Their eyes met and she sauntered over to the bar.
“Hello, Damon,” she said as she slid onto the stool next to him, her breasts rubbing his arm as she moved next to him. With her so close, he could see how low cut her shirt was and all he wanted to do was run his fingertips and lips over the swells that teased him.
“Elena,” he said as he tipped his glass to her. The blonde next to him let out a dramatic sigh from being ignored.
“I’ll have a Bourbon on the rocks, please,” he heard Elena order as he turned away from her and back to his new friend. She happily continued whatever story she was telling before and Damon pretended to listen wholeheartedly when instead he was listening to Elena shamelessly flirt with the bartender. He knew exactly what she was doing.
She was driving him mad, but he wouldn’t cave first. He could almost hear her frustrations because he wasn’t paying attention to her. He smiled to himself when he heard her huff and down the shot that the bartender sweet-talked her into. She was giggling at everything he said, clearly intoxicated.
Abruptly, he stood and held out his hand to the blonde, whose name he learned was Vanessa. “Would you like to dance?”
She smiled enthusiastically and he lead them to the small dance floor- a new addition to the Grille in the past year. He snuck a glance at Elena who was looking right at them- well, she was more shooting daggers at his female companion. Vanessa immediately pressed her body into his as they moved to the music with the other people crowding the dance floor. Elena’s eyes locked on his as he continued to gyrate against Vanessa. He could almost see the anger tinting her cheeks pink before she turned her attention back to the bartender and flirted with him earnestly. He leant up onto the bar and crossed her arms under her chest, clearly giving him a show. Damon felt the possessive beast in him trying to claw its way out. He knew she was just doing it to piss him off, but it was working. She was his, whether she knew it or not. He took his eyes off her and gave his dance partner all his attention as she shamelessly ground her body on him.
Suddenly, everyone’s attention moved to the bar and he heard men’s voices cheering. He looked up to see- a totally smashed- Elena dancing on the bar. She looked sexy as hell up there, but he knew she was wasted. She’d be so embarrassed come morning and she remembered what happened. He stopped dancing immediately and pushed his way through the crowd of people to Elena.
“Elena, get down!” He yelled over the music at her. She glanced at him and shot him a smirk identical to his.
“Go away, Damon!” She said before she started dancing again.
“Dammit, Elena!” He cursed. “Don’t make me come up there!”
She continued ignoring him, so he sucked up his pride and climbed onto the bar with her.
“Damon! What are you doing?” She screeched at him. He caught her as she swayed on her feet. He couldn’t stop his eyes from roaming over her body. She was gorgeous, even while shit-faced drunk.
“We’re leaving,” he answered as his grip tightened around her upper arms.
“I’m not going with you!” She slurred and swayed again. He took advantage of her confusion and jumped off the bar and pulled her down with him.
“Come, we’re leaving,” he repeated while he tugged her along with him. He received boo’s and dirty looks from the men whose entertainment he just took away.
“Why? Because you’re jealous?” Elena asked as she stumbled along next to him.
“No, because I’m embarrassed,” he snapped at her once they exited the building. He came to a stop in front of her and her hurt expression made him change his tone, “This isn’t you, Elena.”
“You don’t know anything about me,” she snarled as she ripped her arm from his grasp and started walking away with slow, wobbly steps.
“Elena, where are you going?” He asked exasperated.
“Home,” she yelled without turning around.
“You’re drunk, just get in the car and I’ll drive you home,” Damon yelled back, ignoring the looks he got from the few people in the lot.
“I don’t need anything from you,” she swiveled her head around and glared at him.
“Just let me get you home safely, ok?” He said as he held his car door open for her. She mulled that over for a few moments before she caved and stomped over to the car. She said nothing as she slid into the passenger seat.
“Why do you care so much?” Elena said, breaking the tense silence as they drove.
Damon sighed heavily, “We’re not getting into that tonight.”
“Then tell me why you keep showing up in my dreams,” she slurred. His grip tightened against the steering wheel. Someone must have been getting into her mind. That thought sent red hot anger flooding in his veins.
“What happens in these dreams?” He asked, trying his hardest to sound nonchalant.
She shrugged before answering, “It’s always the same dream. You show up in my room, tell me you love me, then tell me that your brother deserves me.”
He almost had a heart attack right then and there. Was she actually remembering? Was she breaking through the compulsion? He would understand if she broke through Stefan’s since he was so much weaker, but Damon had been drinking human blood for more than a century. His knuckles turned white from his grip on the steering wheel.
He didn’t know what to say. What could he say? He turned to her only to find her asleep. Relief washed through him. Thankfully he’d be able to dodge that question for the time being. He pulled up in front of her house and got out of his car. He pulled her out of the passenger seat and into his arms before walking her up to the door. Ric’s car wasn’t anywhere to be seen, so he dug through Elena’s pocket and fished out her house key. He pushed the door open and closed it with his boot.
“You are so beautiful,” she mumbled as he carried her up the stairs. He looked down at her and laughed. “You should laugh more, it sounds like music,” she continued with a silly smile on her face.
“And you are drunk,” he responded as he entered her bedroom.
He set her on her bed, but she got up as soon as his arms left her small frame. He turned to shoot her a glare, she was just not cooperating.
“I need to put pajamas on,” she said innocently.
“Well, I leave you to it,” he said as he moved toward her door.
“Damon?” Her voice was quiet and tired. He turned toward her, his curiosity getting the best of him.
She gave him a mischievous smirk, meeting his eyes dead on, and lifted her hands over her head. He tilted his head to the side and gave her a disbelieving look.
“Elena,” he warned.
“Please?” She said while batting her big, brown doe eyes. He sighed and caved. He approached her slowly and pushed her leather jacket off her shoulders. His eyes didn’t leave hers as his fingers grasped the hem of her shirt and slowly peeled it off her body. He could hear her heavy breathing and he could almost see her heart pounding in her chest. His eyes couldn’t resist roaming her bra-clad chest. She was still perfect, if not more so.
He smiled to himself as he turned away to fish her pajamas out of her dresser. When he turned back she had removed her bra and stood shamelessly in front of him with a sly smirk on her face. Her satisfied look only increased when his eyes widened and landed on her bare breasts.
“Elena,” he sighed. Never, ever would he let her get that drunk again.
She closed the distance between their bodies and she looked up at him from under her lashes.
“How do you get in my dreams?” She asked in wonder as her hand caressed his cheek. Rather than wait for a response she rose up on her tip toes and pressed her lips to his. His self control could only handle so much and he gave into her quickly. It had been too long since he had Elena in his arms. Her hands fisted into the fabric of his shirt and pulled him closer.
But when her fingers started to head toward the button on his jeans, his hands reached out to still her questing fingers. He kissed her once more before he pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. They stood like that until their breathing returned to a semi-normal pace.
She pulled away suddenly and coverer her chest, realizing how exposed she was. Damon handed her the shirt he pulled out and moved to the far side of her room to let her dress. When he heard her getting into bed behind him, he turned back around. She looked up at him sheepishly.
“Goodnight, Elena,” he said quietly and moved around her bed to leave. Her small hand shot out and caught his arm to keep him from leaving.
“Please don’t leave me alone,” she asked softly. Her pleading eyes almost destroyed his resolve, but come the morning, she’d realize that wasn’t what he wanted. He didn’t want to deal with that rejection.
“I can’t. Come the morning you will regret asking me that,” Damon said with a humorless laugh, but when he saw the rejection on her face, he felt horrible. “But how about I stay until you fall asleep,” he suggested and that seemed to please her. He sat on the edge of her bed and watched her snuggle into the pillows. As her eyes closed, she looked just like an angel. He allowed his fingers to trace over her soft cheeks. He missed her so much. He wanted so badly to go back in time and stop her from asking Stefan to take her memories away.
He stayed a little while after her breathing evened out; he just couldn’t get himself to leave. He wanted to hold her, to kiss her, he just wanted her back. He rose from her bed and placed a light kiss on her forehead before he turned and walked straight out of her house.
She was starting to remember and he wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Sooner or later she would need to know the truth and he did not look forward to that day.