(no subject)
paint, write, read, sing, mourn the saddening expectations held of a purposelessly fruitful existence.
if i was to climb to a height and shriek, would the sound carry down to the crowds, the swarms of scattering insects, all too busy, too self-distracting to stop and scream themselves?
Only if they were already colder than I could they hear me.
the others would see the look on my face and wonder... why is she not grateful?
or, i wonder what unlucky tragedy has befallen her?--not realizing their tragedy may be all the greater for sharing my own and choosing to ignore.. by self-distraction, self-denial, self-destruction.
"If you're reading this, you can still save yourself" and if you don't stop and count to 10 before you let out your shriek, maybe you get it. if you hesitate, you'll suck you back in and your chance will be gone
and you'll melt and fade to black just like the rest of us.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i want at the very least to be known
if never understood
never related to
even if i will rest forever alone
in my thoughts
in my quandaries
my questions
i don't ask for answers
to share is not in hope of resolution
but to be heard
to be felt
to be known
i wonder how can someone love me
who has never heard my heart
for at my core is so much more
than what they choose to see
take me down to a basic unit of humanity
suffering in my way from my
existential etant-perdue
if i could be seen as not a body + personality
but as me
what i wouldn't give for that chance
my final wish
then i wonder, if someone laid themselves before me
all of them, for me to see
would i see?
perhaps i ought cultivate my own eyes
and learn to better display
before i ask you to look at me
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
emotionally ill, with a twist of anti-internalization by way of flat out rejection
if i was to climb to a height and shriek, would the sound carry down to the crowds, the swarms of scattering insects, all too busy, too self-distracting to stop and scream themselves?
Only if they were already colder than I could they hear me.
the others would see the look on my face and wonder... why is she not grateful?
or, i wonder what unlucky tragedy has befallen her?--not realizing their tragedy may be all the greater for sharing my own and choosing to ignore.. by self-distraction, self-denial, self-destruction.
"If you're reading this, you can still save yourself" and if you don't stop and count to 10 before you let out your shriek, maybe you get it. if you hesitate, you'll suck you back in and your chance will be gone
and you'll melt and fade to black just like the rest of us.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i want at the very least to be known
if never understood
never related to
even if i will rest forever alone
in my thoughts
in my quandaries
my questions
i don't ask for answers
to share is not in hope of resolution
but to be heard
to be felt
to be known
i wonder how can someone love me
who has never heard my heart
for at my core is so much more
than what they choose to see
take me down to a basic unit of humanity
suffering in my way from my
existential etant-perdue
if i could be seen as not a body + personality
but as me
what i wouldn't give for that chance
my final wish
then i wonder, if someone laid themselves before me
all of them, for me to see
would i see?
perhaps i ought cultivate my own eyes
and learn to better display
before i ask you to look at me
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
emotionally ill, with a twist of anti-internalization by way of flat out rejection