(no subject)
So my life has taken some interesting twists in recent months. I became single for the first time in 4 years, realized that the Asshole (the non-affectionate nickname) was not who I thought he was, and have slowly but surely been trying to pick up the pieces of life since then. Let me tell you, it hasn’t been an easy battle- up-hill, against the current, tide, or wind all the way with way too many bumps in the road to count. I guess this is what I get for being happy for so long. But anyway, in my new-found singledom, I have realized some things about myself. I used to be envious of those girls who could and did flirt with anything and everyone… until I became one. And when I had the safety net of a relationship, all was well in my world, because as far as I was concerned it didn’t mean anything and the guys always knew that they couldn’t do anything. But I’m not protected like that anymore. And it makes it uncomfortable sometimes to be around certain people who don’t truly understand that I am just not interested. And the worst part is that maybe AH was right- maybe I am too nice for my own good, but I feel bad telling these people to get lost, for all intents and purposes. But as much as I don’t know what I want anymore, I do know some of what I don’t want. Maybe I will eventually get to the point where I will be able to tell people that. Sigh. I sound like such a brat. But this is the first time I have written in this thing in, what, I don’t know, a long time. For a reason. Ugh… and now I make no sense even to myself…
So really, I miss the normal guys in my life. I spent way too much time with them- the straight, beer-drinking, football/baseball watching MEN who I adore… and now I miss them. Some of them are busy like I am, and some of them are lost to me forever. And it sucks. I’ve always had my girls, but now it’s the guys I miss.
This was depressing, so I am going to stop.
In lighter, much happier news: Congrats to Mara and Jay on their new son- I can’t wait to meet him! Everyone needs to come see Footloose at Bayway in July- it’s going to kick ass. Eventually I will put up the details.
Miss most of you,
Jen
So really, I miss the normal guys in my life. I spent way too much time with them- the straight, beer-drinking, football/baseball watching MEN who I adore… and now I miss them. Some of them are busy like I am, and some of them are lost to me forever. And it sucks. I’ve always had my girls, but now it’s the guys I miss.
This was depressing, so I am going to stop.
In lighter, much happier news: Congrats to Mara and Jay on their new son- I can’t wait to meet him! Everyone needs to come see Footloose at Bayway in July- it’s going to kick ass. Eventually I will put up the details.
Miss most of you,
Jen