It feels a bit like, in the beginning Himchan is actually there. Like, as a living person. Then at "... and before he got a reply, himchan left", this (for me) is not only Himchan walking away in that moment, but also leaving completely, as in dying, because the next line goes "that's the only time they've ever spoken to each other". Then Daehyun mentions non-verbally talking to Himchan and (again, for me) this is already when he starts seeing Himchan's spirit/ghost/?, you know?
Am I even making sense? Aish ;n; But anyways, this is what I read into it... I absolutely love the things you put in brackets, also. I don't know, they add to the feel of the story. It is very vague and kind of... fractured, like a few pieces loosely tied together, and I think the stuff in brackets just fits very nicely, like tiny pieces hurriedly added to the whole story to make it complete. It also really fits the relationship portrayed here, kinda like a broken/unfinished relationship that Daehyun tries to mend by mentally piecing things together like talking with each other, complimenting each other, confessing and kissing? Sort of what he wishes for, in a way. I love how Daehyun silently compares Himchan to the stars and how Himchan then voices it out, sort of like working as a medium for Daehyun's wishes again. And the tiny detail of Daehyun feeling a "cold breeze" after Himchan leaves, even though it had been a "nice spring day", that really has a strong feel.
The line that kind of struck the most was "... the oncoming darkness (the sky’s and what’s about to come)", it's a short, but in my opinion really beautiful line and omfg, I applaud you for this one. And for the whole story, actually! I love stories like this one... and you did so well! I envy you~
You got the "sad and angsty" quite well, to be honest! And the title does make sense... because constellations are stars and both Daehyun and Himchan compared each other to the stars. It's actually a really great and fitting title!
Overall, awesome piece of writing! I'm definitely going to come back and reread it when I want some angst or HimDae... or both! :D
It feels a bit like, in the beginning Himchan is actually there. Like, as a living person. Then at "... and before he got a reply, himchan left", this (for me) is not only Himchan walking away in that moment, but also leaving completely, as in dying, because the next line goes "that's the only time they've ever spoken to each other". Then Daehyun mentions non-verbally talking to Himchan and (again, for me) this is already when he starts seeing Himchan's spirit/ghost/?, you know?
Am I even making sense? Aish ;n; But anyways, this is what I read into it... I absolutely love the things you put in brackets, also. I don't know, they add to the feel of the story. It is very vague and kind of... fractured, like a few pieces loosely tied together, and I think the stuff in brackets just fits very nicely, like tiny pieces hurriedly added to the whole story to make it complete. It also really fits the relationship portrayed here, kinda like a broken/unfinished relationship that Daehyun tries to mend by mentally piecing things together like talking with each other, complimenting each other, confessing and kissing? Sort of what he wishes for, in a way. I love how Daehyun silently compares Himchan to the stars and how Himchan then voices it out, sort of like working as a medium for Daehyun's wishes again. And the tiny detail of Daehyun feeling a "cold breeze" after Himchan leaves, even though it had been a "nice spring day", that really has a strong feel.
The line that kind of struck the most was "... the oncoming darkness (the sky’s and what’s about to come)", it's a short, but in my opinion really beautiful line and omfg, I applaud you for this one. And for the whole story, actually! I love stories like this one... and you did so well! I envy you~
You got the "sad and angsty" quite well, to be honest! And the title does make sense... because constellations are stars and both Daehyun and Himchan compared each other to the stars. It's actually a really great and fitting title!
Overall, awesome piece of writing! I'm definitely going to come back and reread it when I want some angst or HimDae... or both! :D
- Dae
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and wow! thank you for your lovely comment. i was completely blown away!! you really analyzed this omg that's so flattering thank you!!!
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