Work Sux then you die.
So this morning, I'm driving into work, crying because the week-long headache that subsided a little over the weekend is back in full force. I know I've only been at my job for 5 months but I am ready to admit that I made a bad decision in taking this job and move on. The job as presented to me (manager with hire/fire, decision making and such) was a lie. I am basically a middle manager that has to constantly ask for permission. And then I'm asked to be proactive. But every time I make a decision without asking my manager (there are 6) I am told I should have asked for permission. And then when I ask for permission, I'm told that I should be proactive. I wanted to fire a worker for being rude and insubordinate, but instead my manager threw me under the bus with my higher up manager (who I am not supposed to talk to about HR stuff because it makes us look bad). It's a constant struggle to force myself to come here daily. I am in charge of "morale" for a team of 85 people and there IS a budget, but not one of my expense reports has been paid. I refuse to spend any more money until I see those come back. You can't pay me this little and then ask me to dig into my pockets further. It's so disorganized and convoluted. Now we're interviewing people for other manager's teams, and people are being added to our teams without us even meeting them. It's ridiculous. I need out. I would rather be digging ditches. But the job market is fierce. You all know I'm not a whiner and I try to make things work when I can but I'm throwing up my hands. Let me know if you hear of anything. I don't care if it's QA or Games or whatever. Thanks.