Letters

Sep 14, 2009 15:32

Dear Special Agent,

Please stop calling me cakes. At first it was cute, kind of like an inside joke, but now, it's really annoying. WTF does it even mean?? Also, I'm more excited about apple picking than I am about seeing you, because I don't even know how to act around you, much less if I really like you.

Love,

The Perpetual Flirt

Dear Bus Boy,

I saw you flirting with that girl today, don't tell me you weren't. Of course I didn't say hi, I didn't want to look like a puppy dog following your every move. I ran across the street on purpose, and kept walking away from you. Only you called, and honestly I wouldn't have answered if not for my phone that is a touch screen and malfunctioned and answered itself. I don't feel like talking, so that's why I said I was late to work. I hope I don't see you tomorrow.

Love,

Avoiding you like the plague

Dear BFF,

I'm not mad at you. I'm simply anti-social. Why? I don't know. Don't ask me. Just let me be. That's what she said.

Love,

Antisocial Girl

Dear Teachers Pet,

I hate sharing an office with you. I hate that everyone in my office loves you except for me. I don't care what you do, just don't talk with me, because I'm certainly not talking to you. That is unless I have to.

Love,

Me

Dear Asshole,

I don't know why I bother to try and make plans with you. I really don't like you anymore, and I'm forcing myself to see you. That's why I've canceled on you the past three times. I don't really want to see you at all. You+me=over.

Love,

I'm-so-not-your-girl-anymore

Dear Law School Wannabe,

I wish I had $30,000 saved up. But I'm just not as cheap as you. I spoil myself when I feel like it.

Love,

Financially Ignorant
Previous post
Up